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Shadows Of Ponyville

For a uncurable disorder overtaking ponies is spreading, the six have to figure out what is happening and who - or what - has started this disaster.

Being detailed by:
Death-Psycho-Fiction (Me)

Jack5writesFIM

Chapters (2)

Comments ( 8 )

Viewing 1 - 50 of 8
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Evilpinkie42

Evilpinkie42 #1 · May 11th, 2013 · · · What is this?! ·

Interesting.... GOOD JOB TWI!!!!

Death-Psycho-Fiction

Death-Psycho-Fiction #2 · May 11th, 2013 · · · What is this?! ·

2559585
Thx

Death-Psycho-Fiction

Death-Psycho-Fiction #3 · May 15th, 2013 · · · What is this?! ·

2580559

I have to say you have edited the storyline too much. I was going to write a new story like a sequel sort of thing anyway - but her time had come to go in the story. OK, I know i'm being annoying but this is what I think you need to improve:
♥ Zecora was not standing AT the door, she was wondering through the wildernesses of Ponyville.
♥ Rainbow was not a 3 dimensional figure any more, it was her shadow on the ground with no details or anything.
♥ The town only grew dark since the shadows were walking about in them. It wasn't LITERALLY turning grey and whatnot.

Boy, I am picky!

But seriously, that's my opinion on it.

Death-Psycho-Fiction