• Member Since 12th Dec, 2011
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Impossible Numbers

"Gather ye rosebuds while ye may, Old Time is still a-flying, And this same flower that smiles today, Tomorrow will be dying."


Sea Swirl loves Sassaflash.

Sassaflash loves Caramel. Caramel loves Sassaflash.

It'd be so much easier if Caramel was a jerk. It'd be so much easier if Sassaflash really loved Sea Swirl all along. It'd be so, so, so very much easier if Sea Swirl didn't have a mind as wide and vacant as a deserted seabed.

The trouble is: love is like life, and both are like the sea. As simple as they look on the surface, they're so mind-bogglingly strange and complicated underneath that it's easy to get lost without a guide.

Life, love, and the endless sea: Sea Swirl herself can only manage one of those three. But she's always trying her best. And sadly, her best might not be good enough, not when it comes to the one thing that matters most:

A happily ever after.

Chapters (1)

From everyone's friend to everyone's enemy, Gladmane has always been larger than life.

He started off as a used cart salespony in a backwater desert village, but there was no way he was staying there. For he has dreamed the Equestrian Dream, and why be a small-time businesspony when you can be a king?

In a humble hotel, in Las Pegasus the city of dreams, where even the clouds are within an earth pony's grasp, Gladmane plans to show what a heart of gold he truly has. And to hide his mind of steel.

After all, he's good at making friends. He makes everyone happy. And he knows how mean and ruthless the world can be; it's what he's had to fight against just to get here.

So why does his conscience start to prick him, the closer and closer he gets to his greatest performance ever?

Chapters (1)

So once again the day is saved. Literally. In this case, by that new unicorn who came into Ponyville and fought Nightmare Moon, the nightmare that would never end (until it did).

They say this unicorn is strange. They say she's a princess and a witch, who lurks in dark libraries and tames mighty dragons.

Well, Dinky knows that's bunkum, but who cares? She's never turned down a quest, not with her Sisterhooves Sisters in tow.

What a team they are too: Odd Job, carrot-farming sister and cosmic punching bag; Apple Bloom, who's got the heart of an apple (and the imagination to match); Alula, the pegasus who couldn't be more pegasus if she tried (harder); and Piña Colada, who's what you get as a sort of add-on if you seek out Berry Punch's beverages.

Together, they will bravely and nobly discuss over drinks what to do about this new hero in their midst, and see if they can fit her into their usual playtime. After all, it wouldn't be much of a quest if it wasn't dangerous. Twilight will just have to take her chances.

Chapters (6)

Economic Fact of Life #1: A pony in Equestria should always check their own name before applying for a job.

Economic Fact of Life #2: You will successfully not die if you refrain from mentioning Ooh La La in Filthy Rich's face.

Economic Fact of Life #3: Movies are the opium of the working class.

Economic Fact of Life #4: You cannot solve all your financial problems with carrot cake.

Economic Fact of Life #5: Finding a good job is haaarrrd. But...

Economic Fact of Life #6: ...sometimes you get one by pure, blind luck.

Chapters (1)

Toola Roola is a special pony, just like everypony else. She's learned that fighting with your friends doesn't mean you have to stop being friends. It just means you should let them win sometimes, otherwise it looks suspicious.

She didn't learn that from her parents, who have no time for her except by appointment. She didn't learn that from her best friend, who has too much time for her and spends most of it fighting anyway.

And she especially didn't learn that from her ancestral homeland: the distant, enchanted land of Skyra, whence her oddball uncle cometh, but which - in her entire life - she has never, ever seen for herself.

No, she learned it from a book. Princess Twilight SparkleTM's Journal of FriendshipTM, only $12.99 at your local tree-made, cloud-made, or conventionally built magical bookshop! Buy your way to a meaningfulTM, satisfyingTM relationshipTM now, whileTM stocksTM lastTM!TM

Chapters (1)

Cloudchaser is the perfect big sister: cool, calm, collected, and carefree. Flitter is a lot of things – most of them insanely annoying – but she’ll always see her sister as a true paragon.

That’s because Cloudchaser’s determined to act like one. Always. No matter what the cost.

So when they both apply for the Wonderbolt Academy, and only one of them gets in, it’s a very bad time to let the façade crack under the sudden pressure.

Then again, why not crack? After all, she’s walked on the edge of the storm every day. She has to stop acting sometime.

Storms that strong can’t hide forever.

Chapters (1)

Scootaloo. A name out of the tougher side of history. The Rider. The Speed Demon. The Devil-Made Mare.

She dreamed of busting barriers. She dreamed big. They say she dreamed bigger than dreams themselves. And then she conquered them.

The history books say Scootaloo died long ago. But legends live for as long as you tell them. This is the tale that will never die.

Originally intended for Loganberry's Flashfic 150, June 2020: "Dream a Little Dream" event.

Chapters (1)

Apple Bloom wants to grow up. She's sure she does. Surrounded by the family that founded a town, shaped it, and made it what it is today, she finds herself all the more invested in becoming a part of this legacy.

Yet as Apple Bloom's interest in the legacy grows, so does her interest in a pony who never had one.

After all, sometimes there's a good reason to step outside. To fly on your own. To look beyond the herd.

Chapters (1)

The hive is dying. The queen is unfit to rule. The rebellion is nigh.

To a changeling, these are almost impossible concepts to grasp. Faith in the hive is paramount. Cooperation, a must. And ordinarily, Commander Chrysalis would agree. She is as devoted a changeling as a changeling can be.

However, the world is turning upside-down. The enemy is within. And Chrysalis will not rest until it has been purged utterly.

The enemy is strange. The enemy is terrifying.

The enemy is doubt.

Chapters (5)

Some might think Twilight Velvet is the luckiest mother in the world. Yet she hasn't seen her daughter since her little girl was crowned princess. Velvet isn't even royalty herself. How can she be a mother to someone so radically different? So far away? So unreal?

Worse, it's now Mare's Day - a day for celebrating motherhood - and the situation is so bizarre that Velvet is in the odd position of having to go visit her little princess in Ponyville, by appointment, to bring the flowers that Twilight will then give back to her as a Mare's Day gift.

Twilight Sparkle's mother, they call her. Always and always. Princess this and princess that. Wouldn't it just be nice if someone looked at her life from any angle other than "Twilight Sparkle's mother"? For a day, at least. A few hours. Anything.

So who should she stumble across in Ponyville but the oddest and most extraordinary mother of all: Derpy, a mail mare capable of looking from all kinds of angles indeed. Sometimes in ways other ponies can scarcely imagine...

Written for the May 2020 Pairing Contest. Full details can also be found here.

Chapters (19)
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