After the events of the apple family reunion, Applebloom receives a letter from her favorite cousin. This isn't out of the norm for these two fillies as they often write each other but this letter is different...
Wow, you kinda crashed that plotline like a train into a solid iron wall. Like, no joke, you made this the most awkward fic with those letters to eachother between Babs Seed and Applebloom. However, it was funny and I couldn't help but poke a bit of fun at it. I say it's a good humor fic, but not a sexy one. Good job.
Well that "Train" as you called it is gonna break through a couple more solid brick walls and it's called "The hilarity express" and is going to pit-stop at the incest depot along the way!
Wow... I feel like the plot just jumped out of the computer, glued my head to the carpet and proceeded to bash my head in with a garden hoe. Then, the hilarity of the fic made it all better. Definitely following this one!
oh yeahhhhhh time for some babs and bloom lovin lol. I kinda wonder just what the pictures she sent looked like and how she was able to take them. I mean any good ones of her ya know like in a wolf costume? hehehe. I'd say I feel bad for poor bloom seeing as she is my fave crusader but honestly i don't i'm all for cousins getting to know each other better, heck maybe scoots and sweetie can hold the camera and video recorder for them.
Wait wait wait... Plothole. You said the Applebloom showed Applejack the letter to explain that Babs was coming over. Which is quite odd considering how obviously suggestive like 90% of the letter was and Applejack would of figured out the "secret" right away.
okay some major flaws just got me first of all who is the farm pony? I'm not quite sure who you meant as the farm pony, USE Apple Bloom or Applejack, don't add a third name into the mix. it doesn't make sense as to whom is doing what. second of all READ IT ALOUD! you have problems with flow in some places. third your accent is toooooo heavy, even though applejack says one or two things like that, most of the time her English is very proper, she doesn't have huge complex words, but she has enough to imply she's not some inbred hic, farmers may not be the most well read, but I promise you they are very smart
and forth and most important I am enjoying your story, other than that it's very enjoyable
2435904 It's not that great, but it's definitely not terrible. I think my standards are just lower than yours, I have read some jaw-droppingly terrible writing in my time. I would give this writing about 5/10.
i.imgur.com/tfZQS.jpg
Wow, you kinda crashed that plotline like a train into a solid iron wall. Like, no joke, you made this the most awkward fic with those letters to eachother between Babs Seed and Applebloom. However, it was funny and I couldn't help but poke a bit of fun at it. I say it's a good humor fic, but not a sexy one. Good job.
2419519
Well that "Train" as you called it is gonna break through a couple more solid brick walls and it's called "The hilarity express" and is going to pit-stop at the incest depot along the way!
2419510
Will do when i wake up later!
2419546
So far so good. I look forward to seeing what you do with this story. Keep up the great writing!
Go on...
2419544
That would make for the most awkward commute ever...
i wonder if scootaloo and or sweetie belle will be in this.
Ah, Deathsia and filly-comedy-clop, goes together like peanut butter and jelly,,,and porn.
I laughed so much at this, I gotta see how AB deals with Babs.
Set course for another story to follow captain!
Wow... I feel like the plot just jumped out of the computer, glued my head to the carpet and proceeded to bash my head in with a garden hoe. Then, the hilarity of the fic made it all better. Definitely following this one!
Applebabs clopfic?
My only reaction to this:
Behold the poniefied version of sexting! Damn this gun b gud!
oh my gosh thats just great.
2419826
dashie.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw5406-37e.jpg
Okay...well it won't be rape...but....
2421427
THERE ARE NO RAPES ON THE BRAKE TRAIN
2421427 suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/18434597/images/1332573085106.jpg
that pic
2421447 THERE ARE NO TRAINS ON THE BRAKE RAPE
This gone be good!
:)))
I usually don't read Bab seed clop but when I do I read this one
2421447
But is there fighting in the war room?
oh yeahhhhhh time for some babs and bloom lovin lol. I kinda wonder just what the pictures she sent looked like and how she was able to take them. I mean any good ones of her ya know like in a wolf costume? hehehe. I'd say I feel bad for poor bloom seeing as she is my fave crusader but honestly i don't i'm all for cousins getting to know each other better, heck maybe scoots and sweetie can hold the camera and video recorder for them.
That moment where you're reading a clopfic like this, the number of views is 666, and you could care less
Wait wait wait... Plothole. You said the Applebloom showed Applejack the letter to explain that
Babs was coming over. Which is quite odd considering how obviously suggestive like 90% of the
letter was and Applejack would of figured out the "secret" right away.
2424801
...... dude... in the envelope caame 5 photos and 2 letters.
the 1st letter detailing whats in the 2nd which is what AJ saw.
not plothole. Just you not paying attention
I found it funny how even in the letters, the two retained their accents.
Other then that, I have no complaints.
Well maybe one or two; nothing big. You had some spelling errors that distracted me.
Onto the next chapter.
YOU WIN 1,000 INTERNETS
Badly written. Very badly written.
2426692 What? No it's not!
That is funny!
"Meh"
This is not how us southerners say me. Anyways. Great start
okay some major flaws just got me
first of all who is the farm pony? I'm not quite sure who you meant as the farm pony, USE Apple Bloom or Applejack, don't add a third name into the mix. it doesn't make sense as to whom is doing what.
second of all READ IT ALOUD! you have problems with flow in some places.
third your accent is toooooo heavy, even though applejack says one or two things like that, most of the time her English is very proper, she doesn't have huge complex words, but she has enough to imply she's not some inbred hic, farmers may not be the most well read, but I promise you they are very smart
and forth and most important I am enjoying your story, other than that it's very enjoyable
Accents in letters?... dafuq?
Not the Element of Consistency there, AJ.
fatwallet.com/static/attachments/251256_anchorman_well_that_escalated_quickly_966.jpg
Why are the letter written with accents?
I only started reading this b/c I fucking loved the coverart!
2433327i know right
I really like it! My only peeve with it: I don't think they'd put their accents in their letters. But otherwise,
2426887
Yes. Yes it is. Of course, the content is good and all. We aren't arguing that. The writing (especially the accents) is just terrible.
I'm gonna keep reading through it though. This can only end well.
2435904 It's not that great, but it's definitely not terrible. I think my standards are just lower than yours, I have read some jaw-droppingly terrible writing in my time. I would give this writing about 5/10.
Great content, but the accents and grammar... Just ugh.
The train has started...
CHOO-CHOO
i.imgur.com/nxtAjnh.gif
MOTHERFUCKER!
troll.me/images/brace-yourselves/brace-yourselves-for-the-greatest-shitstorm-of-our-time.jpg
prepare your anus Applebloom...
Oh pony, this may end badly.
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... ACTUALLY FUCK IT LET'S DO IT. ALL OF IT. HEYAEYEYEYEYAYEYEYEYE.