The UNSC Deployed it's fireteam EQSC onto the planet Requiem, the spartans within the Pelican were preparing and readying themselves for the tough fight ahead.
About a month ago my teacher gave me a sheet with some homework on and it had a question in which i was alowd to write anything aslong as i used the words on the sheet. it was only ment to be a short paragraph or sentence for each word and well i wrote a 8 A4 pages of a Halo4 MLP crossover fanfic so yeh enjoy!
Cerain parts of the fic will seems as they don't directly want to shout out directly as a MLP crossover, this is because i made it as a scerect little reference to MLP cuz i love the show so much but i don't want to show it directly because well i could get bullied for it but saying that when i draw discord on every folder i have in school i think all of the chavs are just dumb anyway just go read.
Nice, Can't wait for more!
Wait did Fimfic change the one thousand words or more rule before submitting?
2346867 well it still does that 1000 word thing its just that its not fully published yet.
2346499
Believe me or not, I have never played any Halo games, therefore I felt little confused while reading these chapters. There was a lot of action induced by dialougues, but the number of descriptions (which would vastly enrich the story and improve the setting) was close to none. Also, why so short chapters? You could easily merge them to a single one, add some descriptions here and there, explain the purpose of those Spartans soldiers as well as their mission - that would do well for the quality of your story.
Anyway, good luck with writing it.
2547522
Firstly thanks you for the comment secondly i think until i get to about the chapter 6 the fic starts getting good there in my opinion i know the chapter are short but it never started out as an actual fic but then it developed and i decided to put it on to the site which would explain why some of the chapters are short.
This is strange fic indeed but I guess I'll let it slide since you said that it was a school project. But I felt that it could have been better, for example: adding more description about the SPARTAN IVs themselves like what they are and what they do for the people who are not familiar with the franchise and whatnot.
What I'm basically trying to say to you is that the story needs more detail and back story.
Oh and one question. The characters here are humanized, right? That or the whole UNSC in this story are bunch of ponies.
2551011
Oh they are humanized i belived i tagged it as humanized you mite have missed it.