Crying All the Way to the Bank
Chapter 35
Crying All the Way to the Bank.
Heartbreak looked around the storage room a little bit before she heard the clock chime. There was a fancy chime that went off first denoting that it was half past the hour. She counted the rest of the chimes and concluded that it was eleven thirty.
“Huh, amazing how much time you can kill by looking through other p-p-pony’s old things,” She frowned as she stuttered on the word. Walking back out of the storage area she rolled her eyes. “You’d think that I would either get used to that little stutter or just give into saying, ‘pony,’” Not bothering to close the door behind her, she continued on her way to the kitchen area.
“Hmmm,” She looked over the kitchen. “Hello, future bane of my existence...” Tapping on the cupboards, she chuckled. “And by bane, I mean dishes and you guys. Fet, my hooves are such a fetting drag. Maybe I could work out a device or system where there are buttons I can push on you that make you open automatically... Something spring mounted... Yeah...”
Heartbreak smiled. “I haven’t been here a day and already I am thinking of what modifications I can make to you.” She looked around in a slightly paranoid manner. “And of course, I’m talking to myself. I ought to stop that right now.”
She looked around and took in the quietness of the house. The small creaks and groans here and there. The slow breezes and the sounds coming from the Everfree Forest as noon started to encroach.
“Wait, this is my house and my rules. And one of those rules is that I can talk to myself if I want to,” She looked around. “Though Rarity is going to be back here pretty soon... And I don’t feel like cleaning up... Yet. Hmmm, maybe I should go out there to meet her... I do feel bad about forcing her to come into my house,” Heartbreak started to giggle then snicker and finally burst out laughing. “Alright, yeah. There was a little part of me that enjoyed her discomfort in looking at all this. Truth be told, I’m half shocked that she didn’t just go into outright cleaning mode. Then again, she isn’t Twilight or Spike. Right! Going outside.”
Heartbreak looked at the front door. It looked like it was still attached by one hinge. The faded paint suggested that at one time it was red and the rest of the house; a maroon.
“Heh, I see the red door,” Heartbreak said without any musicalness in her voice. “And I want to paint it black. Maybe keep the original colours...” she mused as she walked to the mailbox, taking note that Rarity had knocked it over earlier.
‘Hmph, marshmallow keeps wanting to buy me things, maybe she should buy me a new mailbox...’ She thought as she peered inside of it. Just then she spied a sheet of paper. ‘Oh, oh? What this?’
Reaching in, she attempted to pull it out with her hoof, only to find that the paper kept getting pushed back. “Fet. Locks. Come on! It’s just a paper! Won’t you allow me a slip of paper!? Ugh, stupid hooves.” Frustrated, she stuck her muzzle in and pulled the paper out before it could get pushed back any further. Placing it on the ground she blew a raspberry at the box. “Once I get some decent funds? Mailbox, your days are numbered.”
She looked at the sheet and began to read:
“Current resident, I arrived here earlier this morning to run a routine inspection of lot number 350 subset B, but was unable to find you. As the door was open, (one of the structural defects that will be listed in the list below), I did however proceed with my inspection, finding several structural defects, that will need to be addressed with a local contractor, (list of contractors is provided on back of this paper). Be assured that most of these things are superficial for the time being, however should be taken care of before summer’s end, lest your property be deemed, ‘Unfit for habitation.’ Any future appointments can be obtained at Ponyville Town Hall for a nominal fee.
Signed, Inspector Pony Number Nine.
P.S.
Next time, please be on site for any future inspection at the time of the inspection. There was a removal of a wasp’s nest in the greenhouse area. This was done at my own risk. Thank you and have a pleasant day.”
Heartbreak frowned. “Fetting jerk... Not my fault that the train arrives when...” She took a deep breath. “Fet. Whatever. At least that’s one thing off my mind.” She picked the paper up and slid it into her saddlebags. “Now! Let’s go see if I can’t find Rarity!”
Heartbreak looked at her bike. “Do I want to walk to Ponyville or ride that gawd awful pink thing...” She sighed. “I want to get it painted and those hubs removed before riding it again. So, walking it is.”
==============================================================
I think that it took a good twenty minutes to get to the house before, and because I had to pedal slowly for marshmallow, it took me that long to walk all the way down this road.
The good news is that my hoof has become less achy when I walk. This is most likely because the nerves in that area have either become accustomed to walking or because they have died in that area. Looking up at the sign at this crossroad, I inspect my hoof just to make sure nothing’s stuck in it. Having a rock in your shoe is annoying as it is, having something stuck in a hole in your hoof would most likely be just as bad. Good. Clean as a whistle.
“When I have the time? I’m talking to Pepper about that mechanical plug...” I mutter to myself. Looking around, I can see Fluttershy’s cottage from here. I can almost make out a few animals hanging around her place. Some birds and a random brown thing or two.
Just then, a whole flock of birds sets for the skies off in the opposite direction of my current position. I wouldn’t think anything of this until I see Fluttershy off in the distance reaching for the sky. She looks like she’s calling out to them. I can’t hear her from this distance, but then her head droops down and she looks sad. She then looks up and sees me. I wave at her. Even from this distance? She jumps and then shyly waves back. She then slowly walks backward into her little cottage before closing the door.
Fet-fuck. I was so happy about my new house just not too long ago. And now I have to face the, ‘realities,’ of my situation. Then again, maybe I’m reading too much into this moment. Maybe the birds were flying off somewhere else in search of food and Fluttershy was waving them off.
I walk past Fluttershy’s place and try not to make too much noise. But the place is now deathly quiet. Not an animal, insect or anything in sight. I take a deep breath. We don’t need to think about this sort of thing right now.
Right now we just need to find Rarity and do something of value today.
And lucky for me? I don’t have to wait too long in finding marshmallow! Walking along the main road, her soft little white head and purple mane sticks out like a sore thumb. She’s looking rather happy about something, and seems to be talking. I can’t tell if it is to someone or somepony or just herself.
Hope she doesn’t have too many plans.
“H.B!” She says as we meet up. “What are you doing out? I thought that we agreed to meet at your house at noon.”
“Well, it turns out that the inspector came early and left a list of things wrong with the house,” I frown. “And while he removed a wasp’s nest, he was pretty rude about it in the letter. But we have a list of things to work on and all we need now is a contractor and some p-p-ponies to do it!”
“Contractors? Who needs contractors when you have us!” Comes a familiar, tomboyish voice from down below.
Looking down, I see a face, well, three faces, to be precise. Fuck. It’s the three little fillies that I have wanted to avoid running into almost at all costs.
The Cutie Mark Crusaders.
Not because of their, ‘devil may care,’ reputation, not because of the fact that you can be bipolar about whether or not you like them, not because- Ok! Fine! Because of those two reasons and many more!
“Scootaloo! Sweetie Belle! Apple Bloom!” I shout almost involuntarily.
“She knows our names?” Sweetie Belle asks. Gah! She does squeak!
“Yeah, ah think Applejack told her,” Apple Bloom replies, walking under me. What the hell?!
I suddenly feel my tail getting tugged on and puffed up. “Wow, Rarity! You were right! Her tail does need a lot of brushing!” I turn suddenly and see Sweetie Bell giving me a wide smile that is accompanied with a small, ‘squee,’ noise.
Alright, things are getting too touchy! I jump away from the three little fillies and land right next to Rarity, my face twitching all the while.
Looking at these three fillies, I see something exceptionally wrong. We’ve reached a non-canon singularity here. What am I referring to?
The fact that these three still have blank-flanks.
I clearly remember them getting their cutie marks. I remember the joy, frustration, and frothing reactions of the bronies as they all watched this happen.
And yet here they are standing before me; flanks unbranded by fate.
Alright, I shouldn’t use those words to describe this meeting. But this has severe implications on what version of Equestria I have found myself in.
Is it an alternate Equestria? Has my arrival altered the timeline somehow, causing particular events never to take place? Is this somewhere before the last episode of Season Three?! What is happening here?! What’s going on! Ugh! If I keep over-thinking this I am going to panic and freak out in front of them!
I shake my head of my concerns. They can wait till I’m alone where I can make a list of the non-canon things I have been noticing. Right now, Rarity is looking at me with a shit-eating grin for some reason.
“Oh... You’ve brought...” I swallow hard as the three curious fillies look up at me with bright eyes. “Company...”
“Yes! You see, while I promised you that we would meet up back at noon,” Rarity begins, “I haven’t seen my precious little sister in over two months! So, I concluded that you wouldn’t mind if she, ‘tagged along,’ as it were, while we explore more of your new house!”
What are you doing, marshmallow? You were complaining that my house was a death trap! Now you want to bring- Ugh! Monologuing again! “Heh, Of course not, but-” I look at the three of them. “Girls, would you mind giving Rarity and I a little alone time for a private conversation?” I ask, attempting to pull Rarity to the side.
“Darling what is it?” Rarity asks me.
“Rarity! Keep your voice down! Just what do you think you’re doing!?” I whisper harshly.
She looks at me with a near pouty face. “You always act like I’ve done something wrong!” She whimpers.
“Ooooh, don’t try that with me, Marshmallow!” Rarity jumps as I just outright use the special nick-name. “You were going on and on about how my house looks like a death trap not almost two hours ago! And now you’re bringing your sister and her friends to go and see it?!”
“Well, I had a change of heart!” She replies looking at me sympathetically. “After a little talk with Twilight and Applejack; I realized that I was over reacting and that your house really does just need a little, as you put it, TLC.”
I frown. “Rarity, you’re going to have to excuse me, but I have some serious doubts about your intentions here.”
“Come now, are you still upset about the auction?” Rarity asks me. “It did result in you getting a house. And one that you said that you absolutely loved,” Her smile, almost musical tone of voice, and the fact that there are three little impressionable little fillies not even five feet away from me, are making it really, really hard to express my true rage here.
“Rarity!” As I begin to attempt to explain all the things wrong in this situation, I feel a tapping on my shoulder. Looking down I see Apple Bloom.
“Miss H.B?” She begins, “We’d understand if ya don’t want us around.”
Fuuuuck. Fuck! FUCK! The three of them are looking up at me with the big cute eyes. I brush my mane back a bit and let out a nervous laugh.
“Look girls it isn’t-” Fuck! Those Eyes! Those fucking eyes! Why are they so fucking cute!? “I mean it isn’t anything, my house is just a bit of a-” I start to back away from the big eyed adorable pint sized fillies who... Fuck!!! “Ugh!” I glare at Rarity. “You have until after I set up a bank account to convince me otherwise! Okay!? Now, where is the bank?”
Apple Bloom points across the street. “Ya mean that one there? ‘Cause there are two banks in Ponyville.”
“Uhm,” Wow, how convenient. “I think that will do just fine. Thank you, Apple Bloom.”
==============================================================
As the ponies entered the Wells Cargo bank, Rarity silently cheered on the inside. Heartbreak almost seemed powerless before the mere glance of these three fillies. 'I dare say that I could almost get her to do anything with these three with me! Maybe even get her into a dress...' she bit her lip. 'No Rarity! Don’t abuse your newly found powers here! She’ll catch on too quickly if you do!'
“Oh hey!” Sweetie Belle exclaimed excitedly. “Maybe we could earn our marks in banking!”
“Banking?” Scootaloo asked. “Banking? Are you serious? Standing in one place all day and doing all that math? That’s just boring!”
“On the plus side, we’d be around a lot of money!” Apple Bloom said picking up a pen and attempting to fill out a small scrap of paper.
Heartbreak rolled her eyes. “Why don’t you three try to earn your marks in something you’re actually good at? For example-”
Suddenly Rarity grabbed Heartbreak’s mouth with her magic!
“H.B, Darling! Your hooves and face are just looking all sorts of dirty!” She said with a rather concerned look on her face. “Why don’t we take a moment and wash up before we set you up a bit account?” Rarity picked up three lollipops and offered them to the girls. “Why don’t you three stay out here and wait for us? We won’t be but a moment!”
Rarity glared at Heartbreak the moment that the bathroom door closed behind them. “Just what do you think you’re doing?!”
Heartbreak glared at Rarity and pointed out the fact that her muzzle was still being held in place by the unicorns’ magic. Rarity lightly giggled and let her muzzle go. “I hate whenever unicorns do that. Now, what the fet are you going on about? I know that I was being a bit harsh on the street but that’s no reason to-”
“This isn’t about what happened on the street! With what you know about everypony, tell me that you weren’t going to just outright tell my sister and her friends exactly what their real talents were just now!” Rarity replied with growing concern.
Heartbreak blinked nervously and looked around while raising a hoof. “Maybe... Why? Is that bad or something? Cause seriously, those three’s talents are as plain as the nose on my-”
“Is that bad!?” Rarity exclaimed trying to keep her voice down. “Is that bad!? Yes! That is very bad! I swear darling, you claim to know practically everything about us and yet you don’t know whether or not it is bad if you just outright tell a pony what their special talent is?!”
“Rarity, I don’t know everything that there is to know about Equestria. Just a lot of things. Now, please. Calm down and explain to me why we can’t just tell them.” Heartbreak said, rubbing her temples.
“Alright, to put it simply, a pony must find their special talent in order to earn their cutie marks. If they are outright told what their talents are? They’ll never earn their cutie marks!”
Heartbreak looked at Rarity blankly. “Are you pulling my leg here, Rarity?”
“I assure you that I am not pulling your leg, H.B! And the proper term is, ‘pulling ones tail,’” Rarity explained, turning on the faucet. “Please put your hooves in the sink. Part of the magic of a cutie mark is finding out what your special talent is! The journey, if you will!”
Heartbreak placed her hooves in the running water. “In your case, the journey was pretty long and ended with a rock...”
Rarity blinked and looked in the mirror before looking at Heartbreak. “Please don’t try to change the subject. The point here is that you can’t outright-”
“Tell them what their special talents are or they’ll never earn their cutie marks. Got it,” Heartbreak shook her hooves before arcing one in front of her and giving a faux smile. “The more you know.”
Rarity dried Heartbreak’s hooves. “I’m not sure I understand the reference...”
“Never mind me, Rarity. I’m just trying to amuse myself.” Heartbreak replied as she headbutted the door open. “Right! So let’s go set up that bit account!”
Rarity smiled. Heartbreak didn’t put up any fuss whatsoever! No arguments, no complaints, not even an outburst stating how stupid she found this!
“Alright, No lines,” Heartbreak said walking up to the counter. “Uhm, Rarity I haven’t a clue how to do this.”
“Darling, that’s what bank tellers are for, to help you out if you have questions...” Rarity replied.
“How old do you have to be to be a bank teller?” Scootaloo asked the chocolate brown stallion behind the counter. Heartbreak coughed and looked down. The little orange filly looked up and gave a nervous chuckle before getting out of the way before rejoining her friends as they tried to make head or tails of the withdraw slips.
The stallion looked over his gold rimmed glasses and gave a warm smile. “Hello, my name is Bit Counter, I’ll be your teller for today. What can I help you with?”
Heartbreak took a deep breath. “Hi, my name is Heartbreak and I’m new to... uhm, Ponyville and I am looking to start a savings account.”
“Alright, have you had an account with us before?” He asked.
“No, I have not...” Heartbreak answered.
“In that case, we will need to fill out some paperwork,” Bit Counter, replied placing a small stack of paperwork on the counter.
“Oh joy...” Heartbreak replied sarcastically. “Cause the best part of any day is mounds of paperwork...”
Bit Counter chuckled, “For me it is, Miss Heartbreak. Though I suppose that most ponies dread filling out lines and boxes. I find it a nice break from constantly counting piles of bits.”
Heartbreak looked over to Rarity who shrugged her shoulders as if to say, ‘Some ponies are just like that.’
“Right, whatever floats your boat. But if I am going to be banking at your bank... You should know two things about me, important things-” Heartbreak started.
“A good bank teller should know as much about their current, or future customers,” He leaned over the counter and waggled his eyebrows. “Please do enlighten me about these important things...”
Heartbreak felt her eye twitch a bit. “Right, three things now. One, don’t call me miss. Two, don’t call me Heartbreak. Please call me, ‘H.B.’ And three... Never say anything like that ever again while waggling your eyebrows. It’s fff-” her eyes glanced back at the three fillies behind her. Scootaloo had rejoined her friends sitting on the chairs near the doorway. “flipping creepy.” She said, grabbing the paperwork off the counter and turning away.
“H.B!” Rarity exclaimed.
“Just telling it like it is, Rarity.” Heartbreak replied.
Bit Counter rolled his eyes before blinking as Heartbreak started to walk away. “Hold up a second! Mis- I mean H.B!”
Heartbreak sighed and turned around. “Yes? Did you forget some more paperwork to fill out?”
“Uhm, not at all,” Bit Counter started to tap his hooves together. “Just a few questions if you will.”
Heartbreak turned around and spat the paperwork on the counter. “Fine, but make them quick, I have to see about some contractors with regards to fixing a house...”
“Well, that answers at least one of the questions,” Bit Counter coughed. “This might be an odd question, but do by chance have a hole drilled in your right hoof?”
Heartbreak quirked a little bit. “Yes, yes I do. I guess the rumor mill around here-”
“Oh, I didn’t hear this from the rumor mill,” Bit Counter waggled his hooves at Heartbreak, before looking her over once again. “Let’s see, blue eyes, brown mane and tail, black broken heart cutie mark,” He began to rummage through several stacks of paperwork on his desk. “A new homeowner... And hole in your hoof!”
“I... don’t like where this is headed...” Heartbreak said questioningly.
“Whatever do you mean, darling?” Rarity asked.
“It sounds like he knows too much about me, Rarity. That kinda sets me on edge,” She replied.
“Isn’t terribly fun when the shoe is on the other hoof now is it?” Rarity quipped. Heartbreak shot her a dirty look. “I’m just, ‘telling it like it is,’ darling...”
“Ah-ha! Here it is! A newly started account for one, ‘Heartbreak,’ prefers to be called, ‘H.B.’ with all the traits that I have currently listed!” Bit Counter said as he set the paperwork on the counter.
“What?” Heartbreak replied blankly.
“It means that you already have a bit account with us,” He replied, tapping his hoof on the paperwork.
Heartbreak blinked, opened her mouth, turned and looked at the bank teller once again before shaking her head. “There must be some mistake. I haven’t even opened an account with you.”
Bit Counter looked back and forth. “Nope. No mistake, the paperwork was filed yesterday with all the details and...” He looked the paperwork. “Address provided. 350 Olde Miller Rd?”
“Alright, not only does that have to be a mistake, but that’s down right creepy,” Heartbreak replied, growing concerned. “I wasn’t here yesterday. Who started this account?”
Bit Counter adjusted his glasses. “That party wishes to remain anonymous.”
“Aaand the creepy factor just shot up. Rarity any thoughts?” Heartbreak said turning around.
“I wish I had some anonymous pony donating money to me in my name...” Rarity replied, wistfully.
Heartbreak put her hooves on Rarity’s shoulders. “Rarity this is serious. There is some strange p-pony that I don’t know starting bank accounts in my name, who knows where I live. In Mineighsota? Those could be grounds for filing a lawsuit. That p-p-pony could be using my information to perform illegal transactions or fund- I don’t know, whatever p-pones consider crimes around here!”
“Uhm, H.B.?” Bit Counter said waving his hoof. “Hi. Might I add that this anonymous donor left instructions, rather specific instructions, detailing that you, and only you, are allowed to said funds?”
Heartbreak rubbed her hoof on her temple. “Right, this is clearly a mistake; So, let’s start this over. My name is Heartbreak. Please call me, ‘H.B.’ I have come to your fine establishment to start an account. To do that I am going to have to file this paperwork.” She tried to grab the paperwork off the counter, however Bit Counter put his hoof down and pulled the paperwork back.
“Right. Hello, H.B., my name is Bit Counter. I am your bank teller for today. I am afraid to inform you that you already have an account with us. And that you won’t be needing to fill out the paperwork,” He replied.
Heartbreak chuckled and rubbed her temple again. “Right, you’ll have to excuse me but I’m foreign and something might be getting lost in translation here.”
Bit Counter chuckled. “I assure you that nothing is getting lost in translation, you already have a pre-existing account with a rather large sum that has been recently donated in your name and all that is needed to access this account is your hoofprint, a signature here, and a small drawing of your cutie mark right here...” He offered her the paperwork. Heartbreak glared and was about to open her mouth when Rarity stepped in.
“You’ll have to excuse her, as she said before, she’s foreign,” Rarity began. “Why exactly are you being so pushy about this? What do you have to gain from this?”
Bit Counter took a deep breath. “Right, I’ll level with you. The donor of the account took out a large loan with us. However, due to some rather sticky red tape and large amounts of paperwork, we can’t access that loan unless H.B.’s account is activated. And if I’m the one that performs this transaction, then I have the chance to get a promotion!”
Heartbreak face hoofed. “That is the second most convoluted explanation I have ever heard.” She looked at Rarity. “The second...” She turned back to Bit Counter. “And something about it sounds not only sketchy but sleezy. The only thing I can say that is positive here is that at least you’re being honest with your sleeziness. Unlike some p-p-ponies I know.”
“You’re not going to let that go for a while are you?” Rarity asked irritatedly.
“If I get to be an old nag and I’m asking it on your grave,” Heartbreak replied chuckling lightly.
Rarity glared at Heartbreak. “Charming.” She turned back to Bit Counter. “How much is in this account exactly?”
Bit Counter looked around nervously. “Uhm... Well... Let me write that down...” He quickly jotted down a number on a slip of scratch paper. “Uhm... Here.”
Rarity floated the paper up. “Alright let’s take a look and see what this fuss has been all aboooooo-!” Her eyes went wide and she covered her mouth.
Heartbreak looked over at the paper. “What is it... Holy FET!” She coughed and glared at Bit Counter. “There has to be some mistake. That is waaay too much.”
Rarity grabbed Heartbreak. “Too much! Too much!? H.B. Darling! You are being offered, ‘free money!’ You’re rich!”
Heartbreak glared at Rarity. “Rarity, there is no such thing as, ‘free money!’ Particularly from a bank! That’s ten times what the Princess paid for the house I am living in!”
Rarity shook her hoof and muttered something to herself before bursting out in frustration. “H.B! This is a, ‘good thing!’ Some pony has seen your plight and is offering you a way to start your new life! Why are you so hesitant in taking it?!”
“Because nothing in life is free and everything comes with a cost!” Heartbreak argued. “This is money from a strange p-p-pony! You don’t let Sweetie Belle take candy from strange stallions in white vans do you?!”
Rarity shook her head. “I beg your pardon?”
“Let me rephrase that. You don’t let Sweetie Belle take candy from strangers pulling white carts do you?!”
“Of course not!” Rarity replied looking shocked at even the notion of such a thing.
“Right, then why should I take this money!?” Heartbreak asked.
“Because it is being generously offered to you and all you have to do is give a hoof print, a signature and a small drawing of your cutie mark! Then you can do whatever you want with it! Why with is this small fortune, you could hire the best contractors you like, make whatever modifications you want to that, ‘house,’ you have, or even just bulldoze the whole thing and rebuild a new one!” Rarity said exasperatedly.
Heartbreak’s head dropped. “And add another punch to my, ‘Mary Sue,’ card while I’m at it...” She sighed. “You know what. Fine. Fet it. I’ll sign the stupid paperwork.”
Rarity squeed in delight.
“But.” Heartbreak glared at Rarity. “I am going to make it clear that I am very unhappy about this, that if there are any negative repercussions in taking this money, that you; Rarity, as being one of my... uhm, guardians, or whatever it is that foreign diplomats have, are in part responsible and all the money is going to repairs on the house along with any expenses that go along with it. Nothing frivolous...”
Rarity took a deep breath as Heartbreak took the paperwork from Bit Counter. “That’s fine by me, darling. After all it isn’t my money to spend... Though if you have anything left over, perchance could I change your mind and interest you in some totally non-frivolous decorations designed by yours truly?”
Heartbreak lifted her head in frustration before hitting it on the counter. “Ugh!”
Stats
Page generated in 0.032 seconds
Total duration
904 users online
1,053,121 hits today, 1,960,719 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
Don't you dare think I didn't see that
3447131 Glad somepony caught that.
Well, three guesses as to who took out that loan, and the first two don't count. (I wonder how much petty cash this anonymous donor has...)
And the CMC not having their marks yet? The time stream being a little different? Not to mention just how HB knows how Rarity got her cutie mark... that's a mighty big hole y'got there, y'know, there ain't no need to keep diggin'.
At this rate, they're going to think HB's a changeling who's been spying on them for years.
(Also, that pic. Squee...!)
3447195 Cept' ya know, Celestia wouldn't have any of that. So, ya know, the First Story happening cancels their idea that she's a changeling spy...
...Its either Celestia, one of the 'rich' stallions from Minneighsota, or that mystery alicorn...I wonder...
3447170 One of my favorite songs, I've been listening to it on repeat since I saw that reference... That's right, you made me stop reading to look it up, good work.
Nice chapter. I wonder if it's the alternate timeline or if it's just earlier...
On a side note, I think the occasional reader who complains that the story is "progressing too slowly" just doesn't get it.
That's be sort of like complaining that Tetris doesn't have any assault rifles.
That's not the point of the game, and that's not the point of the story.
Its luna it has to be
sweet god that kind of creepy kind of stalker horror creepy honestly im glad im not HB right now brrr... rarity scary to me now.
Interesting use of the omnicient third person perspective in the first section. I seem to recall we don't get that too often unless there's another character around.
And the bank loan does indeed seem shifty. I wonder who will end up paying it off...
3447419 Damn straight. I prefer it when a story takes its time getting to the main point. It allows for more characterization and a more in-depth story.
Besides that, I'm just really curios about what H.B. will do next.
"You can't have your talent spelled out"
-Rarity
Now if I remember what I was told about season one, her horn did just that.
Also, it is sleazy not sleezy.
Also I am led to assume that HB can't open another account or simply go to the other bank and ignore the money she was just given?
So I guess someone took out a loan and stuffed the money into HB's account.
Was it Rarity, hoping to get HB to "buy" things from her so she can work around HB's rejection of gifts, while using the very same money to pay back the loan?
Would be a rather expensive way to be generous.
Wells Cargo...
That pun was painful.
Hmm, so Luna set up a bank account for HB. Nice of her.
Mary Sue Card: I have some thoughts on this. And no, I don't expect the story to change based on my opinions, unless HB is a fourth wall observer, or else asks Pinkie Pie for advice. This is a good rule set for authors. However, if you are an author avatar, in universe, and actually have no control over anything but yourself, don't follow these rules. If the "author" is trying to legitimately make you a Mary Sue, then, unless it involves the whole passive mind-rape (Consequences of Originality), or otherwise makes it, so that if you go along with it, it majorly harms yourself and others, or else enjoyment of life for those in that group. Hmm, that was really awkward wording...
Anyhow, I would work towards becoming a Mary Sue. Unless it involves mind-rape, then it will never actually result in the problems in the bad Mary Sue stories. (Lots of Mary Sue Traits are fine, its only when they ruin conflict, or make everyone 2 dimensional that there is a problem)
On the other Hoof, I would probably be cautious about the bank account, considering, as HB did, the risk of a con being run.
Telling a cutie mark breaking the ability to get one. Well, I have seen it damage their confidence, after an epic failure. I have seen it done correctly, sort of, where you manipulate them into the situation to discover it for themselves. Never saw it totally break it however. Still, assuming a lack of excessive failure on adult's part, I doubt they are unaware of probable talents. With that known, it is probable that they have to intentionally not tell them what their talents are.
On the whole Cutie Mark story thing, If she just went ahead and did the whole set. (Was an imagine, but I can't find it again, just have the download. Was a Charlie Brown Halloween reference.
H.B. Stop fighting everything. if you don't want what is left of that money once the repairs are done, You can give it away to charity, no better yet, the orphanage in Ponyville!
3448170
*gets image or Rarity and H.B. wearing boxing gloves and shorts and dukeing it out in the bank* hehe.....
...Did I miss an episode or something?
When did -that- happen?!
3447806 "Rarity, A rock!? My Destiny is a Rock!? What's your problem horn?!"
Sonic Rainboom and then gems.
Everything here is rather... vague.
3448564 HB looks at you blankly. Opens her mouth, closes it, opens it again, and then taps her chin.
"Why the fet didn't I think of that?"
3449288 That doesn't answer my question. Vagueness in a story is not an excuse. Except for contrivances and useless bickering these chapters are getting quite old and repetitive. No, especially the bickering and contrivances. If their arguments were a drinking game I would actually have to go out to buy alcohol. In fact I think I will make a game out of it. Every lover's squabble between HB and Rarity equals another sentence of a completely unofficial shipfic that I know you'll hate murder me.
3449514 You're too late. Some body already drew a horribly graphic clop scene with Rarity forcing HB into a dress.
I will neither read nor acknowledge your clop fic as cannon.
3449514 Also, your cries for death have fallen on deaf ears. When this story is over, only then do you have my permission to die.
3449822 Point one: I never said clopfic. Point two: I know it wouldn't be canon in the slightest. Point three: it's not too late; it's never too late. Point four: you are a terrible person for that reference. Pointsetter: I am a horrible person. Point six: I don't need your permission to die; especially when your definition of story is vague enough to mean within months or decades. Point seven: I would be terrified if you read it as I would only ever publish it with your permission. Point nine: I feel something was lost in this conversation. Point ten: This comment is shorter than it appears, I swear.
Uh oh... I do have some bad feelings about this bank account.
One day somepony is going to knock on the door and try to reclaim that favor...
Luna probably has plenty of money to burn, but if whoever it was took out a loan at the same time...
Could it be that mystery alicorn we met at the party? What is her deal, anyway...
3450163 These issues will be continued to be danced around due to the length of the stories. I'm not going to give too much away in these comments.
3450041 I kinda put shipfics and clopfics in the same area... I am sure there differences, but still.
3450319 No, not "but still"; there is a definitive difference as 3450346 points out in his comment(Of note that neither necessarily has to be believable but that's another argument entirely). They are the same as rectangles and squares are the same. A clopfic is (in almost all cases) a shipfic but a shipfic is not a clopfic. I feel as if this comment could go on forever so I'll leave it there and hope you fill in the gaps like we are being led to do through this story (though to a smaller extent I'll give you that much).
3449310 Dargon *rolls his eyes* You have Rarity bugging you, you learned that ponies who are supposedly told what their special talents are will never find them, yet they claim no adult lacks a cutiemark, and The crusaders are running around you.... I think I know why.
Oh, Jet_Black1980. After you explained I understood why H.B. does it. Don't force the story on my account. H.B. is strong!
*I pull out pompons and start cheering for her, hoping she can somehow sense my support.*
"H.B. H.B. I'm your fan,
'cause you do things that no one can.
When life has got me in a bind
To H.B. I turn for strength to find
Fay and princess seek her fall
Somehow she endures it all
*Shakes tail to the public and turns around again.*
Is she snarky? Is she mad?
Being sarcastic is her fad.
*ups the tempo*
Never one to hurt a child
Even when they drive her wild.
Puppy eyes will make her bend.
And get her hours of love to spend.
So if you are ever feeling down,
Like H.B. do not make a frown
Take a lesson from a master
And make yourself a lemon blaster.
*jumps up*
GOOOOOO H.B.
Another great chapter. I do not mind the pacing. It is Slice of Life for a while. Now what would be in the attic? Magic spell book, a ghoul, or some portals? Maybe a pet?
And what about the cellar? We are still left in the dark about whether or not there is a giant pony-eating plant down there. The anemone to the clown fish snapdragons.
As for the interaction between Rarity, the CMC, and H.B. wonderful
Just one question though: How exactly does that Large loan work? How does Bit Counter profit from it?
Oh, and I see romance and clop as something way different. I was actually planning a story about Derpy bringing the mail becoming a daily highlight of H.B.'s day. And in the end, she wonders if, when this is all over, it would be safe to get to know her a bit better.
Nothing romantic or dirty, just H.B. thinking about the future. I don't think she'll ever take a stallion, or even love a mare. But in my head Derpy is a lone hard working mother and she deserves all the love she can get.
That pony is a spy!
3450767 HB "...
It's been a while last I got a cheer or a song... And I so want a lemon blaster with exploding lemons now..."
3450917
Don't we all? I tried to fit in "When life gives you lemons..." but it didn't work out. So have this : ( at 1.18min.)
I am far from being a poet or songwriter, but I will continue to support H.B.! I'm just quite busy with some worldbuilding of my own, so I did not make a full coment on the previous chapter. But I will make a crossover story and let H.B. fry some Fay with draconic fire breath. Or do you prefer lightning, frost, acid, crystal, or sonic. I recommend Discorporating Breath to prevent them from ressurecting. Pesky supernatural creatures with their "I'll be back." rule.
You know, since H.B. technically counts as a changeling she could totally learn to breath fire. And then do a light show together with the snapdragons. Just feed them some Old Jokes. Those dead plants need to be removed anyway.
H H BBBB !!!
H H B B !!!
H H B B !!!
H H B B !!!
HHHH BBBB !!!
H H B B !!!
H H B B !!!
H H B B
H H @ BBBB @ !!!
3450917
"Want a Citrus Hat?
"
http://www.theage.com.au/ffximage/2005/06/25/sam_rock_narrowweb__200x304.jpg
Devil May Care!
White Carts!
Song references!
Bwahahaha!!!
That account sounds like it was set up by a Nigerian prince. This being fraud might require that the banker be in on the scheme to fake the amount and give incorrect papers to sign, but any vigilant person would be hesitant to touch it with a ten-foot pole.
Also, your version of Rarity would be an easy target for a scam.
I bet he got the money from manifest destiny as an apology or maybe something else
Your presecence itself created an alternate, temporal tangent. The original is still there as are all of the others.
The Illogic didn't do anything about that account.
cdn.alltheragefaces.com/img/faces/large/troll-i-lied-light-l.png
I think i know who started the account! Manifest destiny! It couldn't have been Luna because she was forbidden to help H.B. and Celestia wouldn't help get at all. No pony in ponyville has that kind of money so... manifest destiny.
I hate, hate, HATE Rarity right now.
Master fucking manipulator.
Manipulator Rarity, The Thief of Freedom.
why is my go to reaction for flies landing on me "god damnit bug I will set you on fire."?
6074194
Element of Fiscal Entrapment
image is off here too
5251965
Exactly what I was thinking, the Fae have created a time fork where one shouldn't have been, sort of like how The Legend of Zelda has one thanks to Ocarina of Time's events.
No telling what happens in this one, it's possible alicorn Twilight never comes to be.
8462302
You replied to a three year old comment?
8462307
Some three year old comments are worth responding to.
Change "where" to "were".
8462307
Ooohhh, why not? The FUN part is seeing if the other pony ANSWERS back
Correction: "When I have the time, I’m talking to Pepper about that mechanical plug..."