Twilight stared in complete shock at the sight of her mother. Her red eyes had lost all anger as she looked into the terrified blue eyes at the one that had given birth to her. "Mom, what are... You... What are you doing here?"
Her mother just trembled as she looked around to the surrounding area. Buildings slowly burned as the fire grew, causing some to collapse down on top of each other. "Twilight, wh-what... What are you?"
Unsure what to say, Twilight sat open mouthed for a moment before stepping forward. "I... This is..." She had no idea of how to explain what was happening to herself. "This isn't my fault.
Twilight Velvet backpedaled as her daughter took a step towards her. "What happened to you? What have you done to this place?"
Looking around, Twilight saw the destruction that she had caused. The entire area of Canterlot around her had been turned into a swirling mix of fire and wreckage. Screams from ponies running down the streets echoed in the air and rang inside of her ears. Her eyes then travelled down to the small filly still trembling against the wall, the one she was just trying to kill moments earlier. The thing that got to her the most however was her reflection in a nearby window.
Her burning mane flickered above her head and illuminated her bleach white coat. The sinister red eyes she possessed seemed to pierce her own soul as she stared at herself. "Mom, I just..." She turned and stepped towards her mom, "It wasn't my fault, I-
"Stay back..."
Twilight ears laid flat against her head at the words that came out of her mother. "What's wrong? I'm not going to hurt you, it's me."
"I said stay back!" Velvet yelled out. "Get away from me. You aren't Twilight."
That final statement pierced right through Twilights heart and caused it to shatter. Her own mother saw her as a monster and evil. But unlike every other time when she felt anger towards the ones against her, she felt pain
That caused her to hate herself. She looked down to her bleached hooves, and then noticed the small drops falling onto the ground below her. After a few moments, she realized they were her tears.
Her mind began spinning as her thoughts and emotions began surging back and forth against each other. Before the voice inside her head was guiding her to whatever was happening, but now, she felt lost without a guide to tell her what to do. One thing did come to her mind in that moment was to just get away from everything here. Closing her eyes, she quickly teleported out of Canterlot. She didn't even aim for a specific location. She just jumped to the limit of her ability away from what she had done.
---
Spike stared out of the window of the train as it bounced along the tracks toward Canterlot. His mind was racing in concern for Twilight as his friends talked behind him. While on the train ride to the capital, Pinkie Pie began having another powerful doozie shake, this one even stronger than the ones that had happened before.
Clenching his claws, the young dragon looked up into the star filled sky. "Twilight, Please be okay." He said to himself. He could only hope that Twilight would be fine by the time they all arrived there.
In the center of the cart, the others all circled around Pinkie Pie in an attempt to find out what was happening. "Come on Pinkie, y'all have to have some idea what's happenin'." Applejack pressed.
"I have no idea Applejack, these doozie shakes aren't like my normal senses..." Pinkie insisted, "the only thing I can tell is that what's happening is in Canterlot."
There's nothing else you know?" Rainbow asked, "come on, anything."
"Nope, that's it. I'm sure it will all be fine though." Pinkie said with a big smile. "Both of the princesses are there, so nothing bad should happen."
Despite her friends positive look on the situation, Rainbow couldn't help but feel that something really wrong was happening. She knew that whatever was going on was not something small that they shouldn't worry about, but something much bigger. She could feel it in her gut.
A moment later, the train slowed to a stop as it reached the train station. Eager to get to the palace as fast as he could, Spike hopped off the seat and ran to the door. "Come on girls, lets go!"
Rarity chuckled at his enthusiasm. "Easy darling, we are all going. No need to sprint like you’re in the equestrian games." Her smile however disappeared when Spike thrust the door open and ran out. "Or you can just go..."
To everyone else's surprise, Rainbow Dash also took off out of the cart after the small dragon. "Lets go Spike!" She yelled out as she shot through the air.
Back in the cart, Fluttershy looked to her remaining friends. "Um, should we go fast too?"
"Ah think ah'll just go at mah own pace." Applejack smirked as she stepped out of the cart. "Come on, lets get goin'."
As the four ponies walked towards the castle, they started to notice that the ponies walking by had a look of terror spread across their faces. Fluttershy looked back and forth between her friends and the surrounding ponies. Hey, what's happening here? Did something-
"Miss Rarity!" A voice yelled from behind. The three mares turned around to see a pair of unicorn guards running their direction. "Miss Applejack, Miss Fluttershy. Miss Pinkie. We have been awaiting your arrival. We have been ordered to bring you to the castle immediately."
"You have been waiting for us?" Rarity questioned. "We were heading to the castle now, why do we need escorts and-
Her question was cut off as a bright flash was emitted from the unicorn’s horns, enshrouding all three of them. The next moment, they were all standing inside of the main lobby of the castle. Right by their side was Spike and Rainbow Dash, just as confused as they were. "Spike, Rainbow, they did the same thing to you and-
Rarity once again stopped talking when she looked around at the destroyed lobby of the castle. Large scorch marks littered the ground, along with the shattered doorway that sat behind them. "What... What in Equestria happened?"
"So you all finally made it."a calm voice emanated from the side. They all turned to see Celestia walking towards them. "It is good that you all made it here safely."
The small purple dragon walked up to the tall alicorn. "Princess, what is going on? Where's Twilight?"
Celestia shut her eyes tight and turned her head away in shame. She didn't want to speak of wht happened, but she knew Luna was right, he had to tell them what happened to their, and her good friend. She opened her eyes and looked to the guards. "Leave us."
Nodding, the group of guards trotted off towards the exit, but were knocked back as a white unicorn mare with a purple streaked mane shoved past them. Spike immediately recognized her immediately. "Twilight Velvet?"
"Princess!" Velvet screamed as she stormed up to the tall alicorn. Her eyes poured out tears as she stared up to her ruler. "What happened to her?"
Celestia came closer to the troubled mare. "Velvet, what did-
"What happened to my daughter!?"
All of the girls and drake sat still at the sudden mention of their friend. Rainbow ran up to the older mare in concern. "What's wrong with twilight? Did you see her?"
"See her?" Velvet huffed, "she nearly destroyed half of Canterlot... Now I want to know right now Princess, because I know you have something to do with this. What happened to Twilight?"
Rainbow just sat open mouthed at what she heard. "She... She what?" She turned up to Celestia, "What is happening?
Celestia took a deep breath as she looked at the confused faces of the ponies and dragon beneath her. While she had tried for so many years to keep everything that happened in the past, she knew that it was no longer an option to keep this information from them anymore. Summoning the tome Twilight brought, she lowered it down for the young drake."Spike, do you know of this book?"
Grabbing it out of the golden aura, Spike studied it for a moment. "Yeah, I do. I found this inside of a small hidden box in Ponyville library."
Frowning, Celestia trotted away for a moment as she thought to herself. 'Who could have hidden that book there? All of those books were ordered to be destroyed several hundred years ago.' Shaking the other problem she had to deal with, she turned back to the group. "Open the book to the section on one named Crimson Flames."
Confused, Spike did as he was told and began skimming through pages until he found the one he was looking for. "Here it is, Crimson Flames. But... What does this have to do with us?"
"Go to the page of the illustration of him."
Skipping several pages, he stopped, and at the same time nearly dropped the book in shock as he stared at the fire enshrouded unicorn. The others came up and also had the same reaction as well.
"Is... Is that what ah remember seein back then?" Applejack said to herself.
"I can't believe it..." Spike muttered at the page in his claws. "It looks like..."
"Hey! That's Twilight in a book!" Pinkie yipped out. As soon as she said it, she received several glares from the others. "What? I'm just saying."
Velvet moved over so she could get a view of the page. As she did, she gasped and put a hoof to her mouth. "Oh my gosh. What is this? Why... Why does my filly look like that?"
"Come with me," Celestia stated as she started walking down the halls of the castle, coaxing the others to come. When they didn't come at first, she turned around and stared at them for several moments before speaking. "You will all want to know of the truth I have kept hidden for all these years." Turning about face, she continued on, this time hearing there hoof steps behind.
"The story begins over seventeen hundred years ago, back when both Luna and myself were still just young fillies. We were the first alicorns to ever be born. Back then, unicorns still controlled the movement of the sun and the moon, but for some unknown reason, our two souls were connected to the universe to where we could manipulate them ourselves. considered the start of a new era, ponies everywhere wanted us to lead them. To teach us how to use our powers for good, we became the personal students of Starswirl the Bearded."
"For years he trained us in the ways that we would be able to rule the ponies. He became like a father to us as we grew up under him. After time, we finally became the princesses of Equestria. Peace fell upon the land for years to come as ponies saw a new life on the horizon. Sadly though, Starswirl was still a mortal and could not live as long as we could. After fifteen years, he finally passed on." She lowered her head in memory of her departed master.
"Ah'm so sorry ya lost someone like that princess..." Applejack said, "but what does this have ta do with Twilight?"
"He taught me everything that I know, Applejack. If it weren't for his wonderous teachings, I would not be anywhere near where I am now. Because of what he did for me, I believed it would honor his life if I did the same to another; to take a pony under my wing and teach them how to use their potential to the best they ever could. To have my own personal student."
The princess came to her own personal quarters and opened the doors. Stepping into the lavishly decorated room, she walked directly towards the large brown wardrobe against the side wall. Using her magic, she pulled it to the side, revealing an old steel door behind it. Unlocking the many latches on its side, she forced the door open with a loud screech that sent chills down all the ponies spines. Through the opening was a dimly lit staircase going down to some unknown destination "What is this place?" Fluttershy shakingly asked.
"There is something that I must show you all." Celestia stated, no emotion in her voice whatsoever. "Please follow me." As she descended, the ponies and dragon kept close to the center of the stairwell while the torches barely gave enough light for them to see the steps below. Walking on, Celestia continued on with her story.
"I began to look for a pony that I saw had the potential to be the next one to take Starswirl’s place as head of the magical field for the castle. While there were many ponies that were already well known for their amazing talent, I believed the best thing to do was to find a young colt or filly like I was when Starswirl first took me. I wanted to find the right subject that with my training, would be able to become a great and noble pony. And then, I found him."
"Who?" Rainbow asked.
Celestia stopped walking at the question, causing the group behind to come to a halt. The normally level headed alicorn was slightly shaking as she thought back to that pony all those years ago; The one that caused so much horror to the land, but also left that longing pain in her heart that sat with her even to this day. Lifting her head up, she stared at the ceiling for a moment before she finally answered.
"Crimson Flames. The first student I ever had."
Every pony in the room gasped at hearing what was said. "Th-that pony in the book was your student?" Spike stuttered, "but it didn't say anything in there about that."
"There are many things in life that aren't written in books." Celestia continued down the steps as she revealed everything to them.
"I found Crimson in an orphanage near the castle. I had heard there was a young colt there that they could not keep anymore because of what he was. He had a powerful ability of able to create and manipulate fire to his will. I first met him when I went to the small home where he staying. His bright orange coat and red mane will always be burned in my mind, and then I saw why they didn't want him anymore."
Rarity raised an eyebrow curiously at hearing that. "Whatever do you mean? Why would the orphanage want to get rid of a young colt like that?"
"Yeah, that just sounds super mean!" Pinkie yelled with a frown across her muzzle.
"Crimson's power was very unstable back then. Several times he had started fires that had nearly destroyed the home he lived in. But that wasn't why they wanted him gone. They said there was something inside of his head that made him off. The caregivers told me that they have had many troubled and hurt foals come into the nursery, but that he was different than any other one before. They told it seemed like his personality itself was filled with anger towards any pony around him."
"I however saw a pony that had the potential to be much greater than he was. I also felt the pain in his heart, and thought that it only needed something to fill the emptiness. Seeing an opportunity to do good for another pony, I chose him to be my personal student. Luna was still younger than me and believed that I was making a mistake in trying to follow out masters hoof steps so early, but I believed that I could truly honor Starswirl by doing the same kindness he showed me."
"Taking him in, I began to teach him everything that I knew in magic and spells. In only a few years, he had learned how to control his power so he did not cause damage to things around himself anymore. I was astounded in how quickly his powers grew from when I first met him and to what he had become. At a young age he easily could duel any member of my guard into submission with ease. His own personality seemed to turn for the better as well, since his hatred and anger was nearly gone. The more he trained and learned beneath me, I began to discover that he hadn't just become a student to me, he became something more."
"What do you mean 'more'?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"I raised him and taught him everything that he knew. We studied together, laughed together, did everything with each other. After time, I felt like I had a colt of my own. I..." Celestia took a deep breath, "I felt like he had become my own son."
Spike felt his jaw drop slightly at what Celestia said. he could hear in the painful tone of her voice that she was telling the truth. "But... What happened? If he was like that, why did he become bad like in the book?"
Celestia didn't answer as she came to the bottom of the steps. Leading the group down the stone hallway, she came upon another steel door that was also sealed shut. "I believed I finally found something that I had done right in my life. With hard work, Crimson had become a great and strong unicorn. But... It wasn't enough for him.
"He soon began to believe that he deserved to be stronger, that he was greater than the other unicorns. I tried to show him that no pony was above the others like I was taught, but he was convinced he was different. Pushing himself harder, he began demanding that I teach him the most advanced levels of magic, but I told him he wasn't ready for anything like that yet. Outraged, he began to sneak into the Starswirl archives and started secretly reading the ancient spells written by my master."
"As his knowledge began to grow, he began experimenting with dark magic and sorcery in an attempt to increase his knowledge. When I discovered what he was doing, I was outraged for going behind my back and doing that. While I was furious, he however was frustrated that I wasn't helping him. This continued on several more times, and soon I was coming to the end of my patience. I threatened that if he did not stop the experiments, I would make sure he would regret it. But before I could do anything, he pushed his tests even further."
"Crimson knew the story of Aligon, the hybrid that was made from Starswirls DNA and that of a dragons. Seeing how far combining genetics could in increase abilities, he had an idea of what to do for himself. He saw the power that phoenixes have and their connection to fire, he believed he found a way to truly go beyond any form of training could. Back then, Philomena was still young, but her genes were just what he needed. He kidnapped her from my care and..." Celestia lowered her head as she started to cry. "He started running experiments on her to extract some of the power that resided inside of her."
Fluttershy gasped and covered her mouth, "oh my gosh, that's horrible! How could he do something so cruel?"
"He almost killed her and he didn't even care..." The princess gritted her teeth as several tears dripped off her face and onto the ground. "When I finally found where she was, she could barely even breath. I broke her out of his laboratory and brought her back to Canterlot. I went back to find him, but he had escaped with the serum he developed. And then... He finally did it."
"He injected himself with the combined mutated genes of Philomena and the rest of his experiments, causing an unpredicted side effect; his body itself began changing, morphing into a form that could handle the exponential increase in power. The form in which you see in that book."
Flipping the cover open, Spike scanned back to the section of Crimson and stared at the picture of the burning unicorn. His heart sped up as he stared at the similarity between this and what Twilight went through. But before he could ask anything, the princess continued on.
"While his body had gone through a change, his mind was the part that was the most molded. The once calm unicorn that had lived with me for all those years became nothing like I had ever seen before. His soul became as sinister as those burning red eyes he possessed. With his newfound power, he saw everything else weak, and in a small way, he was right; never once after that time would a unicorn ever have the capabilities and sheer level of power he had. Not even King Sombra that you all met in the Crystal Empire was equal to Crimson. with his newfound skill, he believed that a world in fire was what he wanted. He went on to commit acts far worse than anything I had ever seen before."
"He went on a rampage, destroying any village or pony that stood in his way. The massive fires spread across the land, torching every living creature that was in its path. So many lives were lost in such a short time. He then had the plan of how to completely destroy the rest of the land in a single blow. He traveled to the Mount Volvack on the edge of Equestria in an attempt to create an eruption large enough to burn all of the land. Seeing I had no other choice, I went myself to fight him and end his destructive ways."
"When I arrived, he had already begun the start of the eruption. Seeing that he had grown tired from using so much power, I had the chance to defeat him and end his horrid reign. We faced each other in a final duel to decide who was the victor, but..." Celestia's body shook as her memories replayed that day on the volcano. "When I finally had my chance to strike him down, I... I couldn't do it."
The others just stared in silence as the princess quietly sobbed. "Even after everything that he had done to myself and the rest of Equestria, I still had a place in my heart where I still cared for him. I loved him too much to strike him down. He however did not keep the same compassion that I did, and used the chance to take advantage of the fight. I was nearly killed by my own personal student because I was too weak. Then, something happened that neither of us expected."
She stopped once again and walked up to the door she had been standing in front of. Opening it up, they came upon a small circular room with several torches lighting it up. Walking into it, all of them stared at the single statue that sat in the middle. Twilight Velvet felt her skin crawl at the sight of the very detailed stone Statue. it was of a unicorn stallion, bent over in an apparent crouching position. Both his mane and tail seemed to be made of flames that rose high above his body. The most terrifying part was across its face was what appeared to be a sinister grin. Velvet walked right up to the statue and stared into its still eyes. "This... This looks like..." She couldn't even finish her sentence as her eyes began to water again.
"Hey, that looks like Twilight!" Pinkie blurted out loud, causing a mix of glares her way again.
While she didn't say it, Fluttershy couldn't help but agree with Pinkie Pie. That time in the swamp was coming back to her now as she looked at the nearly perfectly done statue. "Is this a statue of what happened to your student?" She quietly asked.
"No Fluttershy, this is not a statue of Crimson..." Celestia felt her heart cringe as also stared at the stone. No matter how long it had been or what she tried to do, she would never forget what had happened.
"This here... Is Crimson Flames himself."
All of them screamed out in unison. "What!?"
"What do you mean this is him? That... That's his body!?" Rainbow looked back and forth between the stone and the princess. "You turned him into stone?"
"No, I didn't. I was too weak to perform a binding spell of that magnitude. But before he could kill me, his body began radiating an out uncontrollable amount of magic. While it granted him so much power, mixing the pheonix blood with his own was too much for him to handle, causing his power to begin spiraling out of control. I used all the strength I had to escape out of there. Then in a bright flash, his body gave off a massive explosion that in fact sealed the volcano back up and stopped the eruption from continuing. His power had actually stopped his own plan."
"But... I do not understand, if he died, why is this happening to Twilight?" Spike questioned the alicorn.
"Crimson sensed that he was going to die when his powers began acting up, but he did not lose that evil smile on his face. He warned me that while his body was to be destroyed, the soul inside of him would live on due to the power of the pheonix. His spirit would return in the body of another pony, one who was capable of containing the power that was once his, and that his goal would be accomplished. And... It seems Twilight is the one."
Rainbow felt her stomach drop. "His... His spirit lived on? You mean like a ghost that took over Twilight?"
"The last words that he said before I escaped were these: A Phoenix must die in flames, and be reborn from the ashes." Celestia swallowed the small lump built up in her throat. "His power was not fully developed when he had it, but a Phoenix adapts and grows stronger every time they are born again. I believe that his powers have actually grown stronger than before, and Twilight was chosen to be the vessel since her powers can control it as well."
Rainbow Dash sat down on the ground as all of this information piled up onto her. Her heart ached as she realized just how much pain Twilight was going through now. With everything she discovered now, she now felt even worse for never attempting to aid her friend through everything that had happened now. Her eyes became glossy as her guilt began building up even more now. 'Twilight, I'm so sorry.'
Velvet was knelt by the bottom of the statue, her head hung low as she wept. "My daughter has become this monster now..." Her eyes poured out tears as she let out all the emotion she had inside. "Why did this happen to my baby?"
Seeing the mare in pain, Celestia trotted up to her side. "I am so sorry that this has happened. If I could have found out she was the one sooner, I could have been able to possibly stop it." She draped a wing over Velvet's back. "I wish that I could have-
"Don't touch me!" Velvet screamed out as she smacked the large white wing away. She turned around and faced the shocked princess, her eyes filled with pain and anger. "This is all your fault."
Celestia stepped backward at the accusation. "My fault? You blame me for this?"
"Everything you told me says you are to blame! You made an insane pony serve under you, and you made him stronger. And when he started to change, you were too weak to do anything. Now my own child has been taken over by this devil because you didn't get rid of him when you had the chance!"
Glaring back, Celestia stepped forward until she stood over the shorter mare. "I tried to stop him, but he was able to continue working in secret. Do you think I wanted him to become something like that? No, I loved him and tried to bring him back from that insane path he was on."
Despite knowing she was yelling at the princess,Velvet held her ground and snapped right back. "What about when he tried to blow up everything with a volcano? And I have knowledge of phoenixes as well; if you just killed him, he couldn't have been reborn, but you gave him the chance to come back. Now, my daughter has been turned into demon just like he was!"
"HE WAS MY SON!" Celestia screamed back, "I loved him and-
"He was not your son! You will never understand a true bond unless you have had your own foal."
Celestia felt like a knife had been shoved into her heart at that remark. Her eyes burned with anger as she brought her face closer to Velvet's. "any pony can grow a bond that powerful! I love Twilight as well, and that's why I couldn't kill her earlier when I-
"You what!?"
Celestia felt her heart stop when she realized what she had just revealed. She looked to the faces of the element bearers as they all stared at her in shock. Spike’s eyes were also wide with disbelief at hearing that his sister had almost been killed by the princess. She then looked back to Velvet who mouth slightly quivered as more tears began to come up. "You... You tried to kill my daughter?" The crying unicorn stuttered.
Sweating, Celestia tried to explain her reasoning. "I... I didn't want any of this to happen. When I found out Twilight was the one, I panicked and tried to keep my past from returning to destroy my home. But when I did get the-
WHACK!
The loud slap across Celestia's cheek echoed inside of the small room. Everypony was too shocked to even speak after seeing Twilight Velvet's hoof smack across the princesse’s face. Celestia herself just sat still, her cheek marked red by a hoof print from the impact. She slowly turned her eyes back to the mare below her.
Velvet just kept her watery eyes on the princess as she lowered her hoof down to the floor. She didn't even say a word as she turned around and walked out of the room and up the stairs.
cool story i kinda crie when i read this:(
Please... let Twilight live...
Wow That's funny. I was just thinking about when the next chapter would be, and long and behold. Unforchantly I'm to tired to read it right now.
Crimson Flare, bad guy, HUZZAH!
just curious as to how many more chappters this is gona have?
2673652
Are you a wizard?
But seriously. Even if it was just exposition it was good exposition. Velvet is probably not going to forgive Celestia ever. Should have listened to Luna.
'bout time celestia got put in her place.
Yes, I'll admit that this satisfied me. Although, I doubt you can repeat that so bring out the next chapter quickly.
2673636 some want her to die, some want her to live. We will see later
2673695 at least eight more, probably more
2673719>>2673771 I appreciate your support of that ending
2673851 you doubt this will satisfy you again?
Yeah, that was poorly thought out on Celestia's part. Twilight comes to her scared and afraid, asking her for help, and she tries to kill her.
Bitch deserved that, just sayin
>Recoils from daughter and tells her to "stay back"
>Slaps Celestia for trying to prevent planetary extinction
You know, Velvet, I'd sympathize with you more if you weren't a tremendous bitch.
celestia got bitch-slapped
Psycho pyromaniac stopped by her mum and then tries to explain. Seems legit.
Smack a hoe.
ALL HAIL TWILIGHT, OUR NEW FIRE OVERLORD!
Seeing the mare in pain, Celestia trotted up to her side. "I am so sorry that this has happened. If I could have found out she was the one sooner, I could have been able to possibly stop it." She draped a wing over Velvet's back. "I wish that I could have-
Celestia stepped backward at the accusation. "My fault? You blame me for this?"
Wow, how Celestia can still be so blind, pony what she though was her son wanted power and he secretly developed it again Celestia wishes, but Twilight was opposite, she not wanted power, she walked to Celestia with hope to gain help, Celestia did not discovered it to late, Twilight went to her in time, how can Celestia be so blind to not see that she is mostly responsible for Twilight going rampage, the harder she acted again Twilight, the more insane she made her, and even now when she explain everything to element bearers and Twilight mother, she still is blind to her own faults.
I am actually surprised that Velvet was the only one who smacked her and that other element bearers just stand and watch, they saw that Twilight went to Canterlot to ask Celestia for help and Celestia just said that she tried to kill Twilight, should not they figure it out ' Twilight went to ask for help + Celestia try to kill her = go rampage and destroy Canterlot ', princess or not, element bearers should point yell and point hooves on Celestia for not helping Twilight ( after all Twilight kept it under control for months and then she snap in 1 day, can it get any more obvious ? ).
And do I need to mention that Spike think of Twilight as mother, he saw Twilight being in terrible shape, he saw her going to Canterlot to ask Celestia for help, and here he find out that Twilight go rampage because Celestia tried to kill her, Spike should literally assault Celestia for it just like Velvet did if not more.
In next chapter they better make Celestia understand her mistake because it is so to obvious, she should figure it out 1-2 chapters ago.
You know, I totally understand Celestia attacking Twilight the first time was the catalyst of everything going wrong, thus she is to be blamed here. But Velvet didn't know how things happened. She does nothing for her daughter when she confronts her, even rejecting her, and then acts like a complete hypocrite. I mean, Velvet blames everything on Celestia for being uncapable of killing her own adoptive son to save the whole world (low blow there)... and then slaps her for even trying to save the world again, just because this time it was her daughter, even though Celestia accepts that she couldn't because she loves Twilight. Sorry but your Velvet is an inconsiderate bitch.
For some reason I want to kill her.....
2673881 I mean this satisfied me because of how confrontational Velvet Sparkle got with Celestia. Unless you were planning on repeating that with the rest of Twilight's family, I doubt I'll be satisfied if the next chapter takes so long.
needs more Saxton Hale...
EDIT: Saxton Hale can kill Crimson without touching Twilight, from Earth, while sleeping, with his DAMN BARE HANDS!
Good story - please continue.
Though I would recommend going over first few chapters and fixing missing capitalizations, etc.
Chapter 4 has 3 times wrong plural form - ponies not "pony's".
2674618
smack, smack, smack smack the hoe
smack, smack, smack smack the hoe
BITCH SLAP!
Poor Velvet This story is being better with each chap...great work!!
2674046>>2674269>>2674904>>2674935>>2678828 thank you all for your opinions. It's nice to see how each person reacts or feels a certain way to the different scenarios of the chapters. And while I have said I am trying to update faster, I really meant it. Work and other things in life are crazy, I have been trying to finish several stories and get them out of the way, and I caught a horrible case of the flu few days ago. Had to force myself to write this last chapter while sick
2678857
;( so sad, you feel betta right?
2678857
I understand Celestia motivation, but I do not like how blind she is, she just refuse to admit her faults.
I understand why in past she hesitate from killing a pony what was almost like son to her, the difference was that she tried to help him all the time until it was to late while he refused to take help.
In Twilight case, Twilight come and beg her for help and Celestia return with violence, sure, she refuse to kill Twilight in the end, but far to late, and the worse part is that Celestia do not see it, she still refuse to admit that Twilight going rampage is her fault.
All I want is for her to finally admit that she SCREWED UP, not by not killing Twilight, but by trying to kill her before even considering to help, can one of element bearers just tell her that Twilight was struggling for 3 months, it would make Celestia understand that Twilight had it under control for a very long time, and the only reason why she became evil is because of Celestia and Luna action, violence again Twilight created fear and fell of betray in her, fear lead to hate and desire for power to resist those who she fear, and fell of being betrayed lead her to desire for vengeance.
As much as I understand Celestia action, I hate that she act so stupid, lines like:
Seeing the mare in pain, Celestia trotted up to her side. "I am so sorry that this has happened. If I could have found out she was the one sooner, I could have been able to possibly stop it." She draped a wing over Velvet's back. "I wish that I could have-
Celestia stepped backward at the accusation. "My fault? You blame me for this?"
Just prove how blind she is, she say that she did not found out about it in time, but did not Twilight come to her when she still controled that being inside her, it was Celestia who wasted that opportunity, and why she refuse to take a blame for this, everything started to go downhill the moment she decided to kill Twilight without giving her a chance.
Can you please not make Celestia act stupid in next chapter, can she finally see for herself that she screwed up, please.
PS: I hope you will get better, stay healthy.
Velvet is a hypocrite. I get that you're pissed about someone trying to kill your daughter, but wait didn't you just reject her without getting an explanation? You know leaving her for dead because she had to run away from ponies who also didn't bother to get an explanation from her? Celestia deserved that, but not from you, there are better ponies who deserve to do that.
great chapter! i really like how you emphasize on celestia's "weakness", she is simply too kind to those she has formed an emotional bond with, but she won't share her burdens either, which means that stuff like this happens; it also doesn't go very well with her manipulator personality at times.
i liked the backstory about crimson, it didn't feel forced or out of place; it also explained very clearly how philomena was a part of that ordeal.
Heh, this fic, every time, at the end of each chapter, I'm really really intrigued to what will happen next.
A comment like 'MOAR' would kind of suffice what I mean I guess, but, well.This was a great chapter indeed. It shows that there still might be some hope for Twilight regaining control. Then again, so far, she seems to be on her own. Her friends haven't been able to reach her yet, and, both her motherly figueres have rejected her more or less.
This, you've written in a great way. Twilight confusion and pain can be understood from reading the few rows in the start of the chapter. I'm hoping, for everyones best, that her friends will be able to find her soon, and hopefully work something out. And yet, I could also buy a more tragic ending, hm, really looking forward to where you'll go with this.
I'll say that I like this take on the princesses. In this chapter, Celestia. She's shown with her own flaws and faults; as she gets blamed for her faults, she gets psychically hurt, and let's these hurt feeling reek onto the one blaming her.
[Incoming tangent]
- Is this OOC? Well, from what we know from the show itself, maybe a tiny bit, but, the show doesn't touch the characters reactions to sadness, or even less tragedies. After what've happened in this fic so far, and with the history of Celestia (and Luna) presented like this, her actions are really understandable, and therefor, in character as far as I can tell.
[/tangent]
So, summarizing this comment: The characterizations of each character so far has been great, and their, hm, development(?) has really been fitting along the storyline. And, as mentioned early on in this comment, every chapter leaves me truly wondering what'll happen next. So many outcomes possible. You have me stuck along the ride here, heh.
Thanks for writing this and putting it up for everyone to enjoy!
M
Velvet seems to have a large double standard here. It's ok for Celestia to kill her own child, but it's not ok to kill Velvet's child. Also, about the whole "wont understand 'til you have your own" argument, I could bring up people loving adopted children just as much as biological children, but I wont, and will instead focus on an interesting piece of fanon. Many authors that I have read have painted the princesses as unable to have children for one reason or another. In Celestia's case, having a surrogate child may be the closest thing she will get.
Motherly love can go a long way
Welp. Velvet freaked out, then slaps Celestia.
Then Celestia reveals backstory and proves a big point:
She's a dumbass.
~Skeeter The Lurker
Hey Celestia
1-media-cdn.foolz.us/ffuuka/board/tg/image/1371/84/1371846451009.png
When velv3t slapped celestia I thought she was gonna destroy her but alas I was wrong
Still waiting for the part where someone says how CELESTIA SPED UP TWILIGHT'S TRANSFORMATION BY PROVOKING HER BECAUSE CELESTIA HAS AN IQ OF 5. Or did I miss that part? :/
I like this new twilight. Reminds me of ... well... me...
-AManEatingRadiatedMaggot and Et Infernus Edicus
Well, Velvet's an arse of a pony in this story. Why does she always so obnoxious and stupid in some stories?
2858803
Yeah, so it seems. Sure biological children are one thing, but still she doesn't understand because she wasn't there. She's just hurt, but lashing out at Celestia isn't going to solve anything. Mortals... so terribly shortsighted.
Ahem... Bitch Slap.
Wait, Starswirl's her master?