Tales of the Equestrian Frostland

Lost_Data

Lost_Data #1 · January 13th · · · Are we going to have a Winterhorn here?! ·

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I liked this very much, I it going to be updated soon? I hope so

Felfox

Felfox #2 · January 13th · · · Are we going to have a Winterhorn here?! ·

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11797931
Yep, sorry for the delay, got a lot of stuff happening. If i don't get distracted the next chapter should be there in a few days

Lost_Data

Lost_Data #3 · January 14th · · · Are we going to have a Winterhorn here?! ·

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11798503
Thank you!

PonyDragon

PonyDragon #4 · March 6th · · · Are we going to have a Winterhorn here?! ·

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Suddenly, an almost deafening whistle rang throu the dark corridors of the coal mine.

I walked home through the city’s narrow alleys. They almost always looked improvised, as if they were quickly squeezed between the talll steel framed and wooden buildings that stand here right now in a rush, and then nopony bothered to make them into proper streets.

Most likely because that's exactly what had happened.

“What’s fake about it? Hey! Come back! What’s fake about it?!” I shouted at the painting, but the spirit seemed to leave me alone with my thoughts.
Fucking smartass, he knows that i’ll be thinking about it now!

Mission accomplished!

the piece of the Generator that protruded from above the house across the street continued to be cold and dark, encased in some kind of steel makeshift scaffolding.

That's not good...

It wasn’t supposed to break! Ever! It was supposed to be the finest of equestria’s engineering! Concept of The Twilight Sparkle herself!
I threw the paper on the ground, and began walking in circles and hyperventilating.

Rocky: "Just what would Twilight do?!"
Twilight:
derpicdn.net/img/view/2019/4/6/2004586.gif
Source.

I’ll go out into the frostland, and maybe, I won’t be able to actually do it, but at least, I’ll show them that I didn’t give up!

Go for it!

Good premise!
I enjoyed reading it.

Suggestion:
I noticed a few typos while reading this. Consider running your text through a spellchecker, and even if you just use the one build-in inside your browser.
(The one in my browser already found a few inside the quotes i posted.)

PonyDragon

PonyDragon #5 · March 8th · · · Better to turn back now ·

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Usually at this hour, ponies would gather in a massive column that would be heading to their workplaces, but now I only saw a few, some of them dragging their belongings on sledges behind them, running to the nearby cities probably. If I remember correctly, the nearest one was at least a few days of travel away.

Okay, that's better than I expected.
I mean there are other cities, and it's only days, not weeks of travel.
But hey, they did call it "Generator No. 243" earlier, so there is actually a high chance there are several more generators out there.
Also, it's good to see there is no one forcing them to stay. Or at least not yet...

“So leave me alone, I’m going to work!” Yeah! That's a good excuse! “I can’t just leave my job, somebody has to dig the coal.” I said firmly

He is not wrong.
Unless, at this very moment, he gets replaced by a newly finished automaton...

I sighed. At least I didn't do anything stupid yet.

That was a close one...

“Look!” He nodded towards where the last lamp hung on the wall of the tunnel. I just shrugged and murmured something.under my nose. “Don’t ya fuckin dare mine any further! There's nopony to build another roof support!”

Okay, that does sound dangerous...

I bit my companion's clothes on his back, and began dragging him towards the lift. I didn’t even know his name.

Didn't he bring a cart to carry the coal? maybe it can be repurposed to carry ponies. Also, wasn't his name Firm Keep?

“I don’t fucking know, I’m just a stupid coal miner!”

I just noticed something:
If you put enough pressure on coal, it will eventually be turned into diamond! Maybe that's a hidden reference between his job and his sisters name?

PonyDragon

PonyDragon #6 · March 9th · · · Better to turn back now ·

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He sighed, “Don’t worry, they’ll give me a prosthesis anyway. I’ll be like new. And it’s not like you came out of it without a scratch either.”
“What are you talking about?” I rose on the bed. He just tapped his left ear. Oh no. I launched my hoof to my head, to check for my ear, but it wasn’t there! At least, not entirely. I wanted to start swearing, or kick something, or maybe– or–
I just hid my face in my hooves, and took a long, deep breath. Could be worse. Definitely could be worse. Still a damn shame

Maybe you can get a prosthesis, too?

“Look at the good side,” He said with his mouth full, “maybe it won’t impress any frostlander, but ponies who live here, the city mares. Oh they like scars like that. ll will be yours in no time, im telling you!” he chuckled

Heh. You can only hope...
(And what do you mean with "ll will be yours in no time"?)

I opened the doors to my family house, also with chalk signs written on them. On the inside there was a little bowl next to the door on the inside of the house, with a couple slices of apple in it. So much effort to convince the spirits to piss off, and that one glued himself to me anyway.

Now imagine the trouble you would be in if there were no spirit protection...

“There will be twenty hour shifts in the mines. Don’t go to work tomorrow, I'll talk to Sweet Conduct as soon as I can. There should be a lot of vacancies because lots of ponies fled to nearby villages and cities, and I helped her daughter get to the scouts and she still owes me for that.”

Not long until there isn't a single miner left...
Still, good to hear there are nearby villages and cities, meaning Equestria still has a chance to survive.

“Well the paper work's all here! I’m going to sigh in right now!” I growled, and punched my chest pocket in which i had the paper, ”You're gonna see for yourself!”

Go for it!
(And it's probably supposed to be "sign in", not "sigh in".)

Good chapter!
I enjoyed reading it and look forwards to see what happens next.

You think there will be a meeting/confrontation between him and Diamond later, maybe even in the middle of the mission?

Felfox

Felfox #7 · March 10th · · · Better to turn back now ·

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11845699
Damn i didn't expect anybody to put in so much work into commenting a random aah story. I appricieate
And yeah there's a lot of typos, for which i apologise. Ill try to get that fixed for the next chapter.
And about him meeting his sister, WEll you'll just have to stick around to find out.
I got my ass back to writing after i was busy with other stuff so it shouldnt take too long that to happen

Lost_Data

Lost_Data #8 · March 27th · 1 · · What would your sister do? ·

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Hope rises significantly

Discontent falls slightly.

ONWARDS! Into the Frost lands! Danger and Death stocks every turn.

PonyDragon

PonyDragon #9 · March 31st · · · What would your sister do? ·

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She smiled with satisfaction, “I don’t think you’ve got the time to be picky at the moment, Mr. Rocky.If something bad is gonna happen, it’s not gonna be because of me.”

Except it will be because of you.
For all you know not helping him might doom the city. And that includes you.

Then I looked towards the edge of the group, and saw a quite small navy blue unicorn mare. A parka that looked like it was older than her, hoofwarmers tied with a thin rope instead of laces. She looked weak, like she wouldn't even be able to pull her sled, and wasn’t pairing with anybody. Shy maybe?
Good, that's good. I won’t be seen as weak if I go with her.
I approached her without a word, she looked at me with a disoriented look, but followed me. as we joined the rest of the pairs in a neat line almost at the end.

Let's hope they make a good team, because this will be a very dangerous mission.

What if I’d be the slowest one then? I’d be an embarrassment to everybody! They’ll- They’ll laugh, or… talk about me behind my back. I’ll be ‘the guy that can’t even carry for himself’ An embarrassment.

Or they might say Look at that big, strong stallion! He is helping the small mare in her time of need so they can complete the mission! What an example for all of us! instead?

I had no idea the outside of the city could be so dangerous. It hadn’t even been a day and something like this already happens! Can’t something good happen to me for once!?

Diamond Chase: "Welcome to my world, little brother."

“Let’s fucking move! We have only a few hours till sunset!”

Probably won't feel like a few hours...

“‘Weapon Factory’? That’s one creative name,” I commented.
“At least it’s intuitive right? It’s the only still working weapons and ammunition factory in the frostland! It’s really an incredible story, like, imagine you’re just one pony, and–
“You’re sidetracking.”

No, please continue!

With every second, every passing moment, as the sun got closer, and closer to the horizon, I got more and more anxious being outside of that shaft.

I can feel the tension rising...

Hope rises significantly

It does... but you are not safe yet.

Good chapter!
I enjoyed reading it.

I wonder what happens next?
They will probably rest in the mine until sunrise, hoping the Ursa doesn't break through.
Then they will try to continue on their way.

But it may also be possible the mine itself plays a larger role.
Maybe it's mine shaft is leading towards their target (or something near it), allowing them to bypass the Ursa completely.
Maybe I'm reading too much into it, but the hole in the ground (in place of the elevator) implies you can get down, but not up.

On a side note: the captain really likes swear words, doesn't he?

Felfox

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