11 - Solecism
Sergeant Bristle was usually a rather friendly stallion. He had a commanding voice he rarely had to use—an imposing demeanor, sure. But when it came down to it, he was one of the most talkative and relatable stallions in the entire Crystal Guard. He prided himself on that fact; most knew not to get on his bad side.
So it was with great confusion and avoidance that the entire academy gave the Sergeant a wide berth as he angrily huffed down the hallway, an all-encompassing glare adorning his features. A few of those he’d consider friends chose not to greet him today, not when he was in this mood. They knew better than to interrupt. The one stallion that did try to stop him for a moment got a side eye and an uncaring response: “Not right now, rookie.”
Though this was a rather rare case for the respected Sergeant, it was all in all rather unsurprising when his path of anger led him straight to the door of his Corporal’s office. A hearty knock was ushered, and so too was Smoke Strike’s indifferent voice from the other end: “Come in.”
And Bristle did just that, opening the door swiftly and shutting it with a bit more strength than required. Smoke Strike immediately sat up with wide eyes as the sergeant’s glare washed over him. “Yes, Sarge?” Smoke asked.
“Don’t address me so informally, Corporal Smoke Strike.” Bristle growled back impatiently.
"Yes, of course. My apologies, Sergeant Bristle.” Smoke said back with a salute.
Bristle studied him for a moment longer and released another short growl, “Do you have any idea why I’m here?”
Smoke Strike’s eyes darted in confusion. “No, Sergeant. Did I perhaps anger the receptionist again?” He commented with a wry grin.
Bristle took a few more steps forward until he was right before his desk and slammed down two papers right before the confused stallion, eliciting a wide-eyed look. “A report of your behavior, straight from Sir Shining Armor AND Princess Cadance.” Bristle glared. “Mind explaining to me what you did yesterday to elicit such a response?”
Smoke Strike reached upward to grab the paper, but Bristle stopped it with his own grip. “No, I want to hear it from your own mouth. Not you reading it to me.” Bristle said with a huff. “I already know what you did. Do you know what you did?”
Smoke Strike knew better than to look for a way out of the situation or to downplay his actions to make himself look better. So with a heavy sigh, he retracted his hoof and softened his brows. “Yes, Sergeant. I may have made some… regrettable choices in my wording at the castle yesterday.”
“To whom?” Bristle pried with a raised eyebrow, expecting a fuller answer.
“To Kieran.” Smoke replied.
“And why is that?” Bristle asked further.
Smoke Strike sighed and rested his head in his hoof for a moment before looking back up apologetically. “Sergeant, you know I’m not good with foals. It’s just… yesterday, I was a bit on the angrier side. Kieran wouldn’t stop asking me questions. It was-”
“I don’t want excuses, Smoke.” Bristle cut him off.
“Then I won’t make any,” Smoke said with a heated sigh. “Do you want the truth, Sergeant?”
An expecting nod urged him on, and Smoke sighed. “I think the foal got off too easy. I feel he should’ve at least been put on civil duty for everything he put us through. And I’m not the only one who feels that way.” Sergeant Bristle narrowed his eyes but didn’t interrupt the stallion’s rant.
Smoke Strike raised his head and shook his head. “I personally think the royal family is being too generous. So what if the foal is a copy of their daughter? It’s clouding their vision. Kieran is nothing more than a hooligan coasting on the princess’s good will.”
“Ah, so you feel you understand the situation better than the two who’ve spent the most time with him? And you and the other hotheaded recruits have decided that you reserve the right to give punishment?” Bristle remarked a bit mockingly. Smoke had nothing else to say, and Bristle sighed again. “Regardless of your personal feelings, Corporal, I must remind you that Shining and Princess Cadance both have the final say on everything.
Smoke Strike begrudgingly nodded, a bit of disdain on his muzzle. Bristle huffed, “And when you do dumb things like insult the foal directly, it reflects badly on all of us. You’re a guard for the Empire, which means even if the royal family has someone you absolutely despise, it is still your duty to see to their safety.”
Smoke growled, "Yes, but-”
“You signed up for that!” Bristle interrupted, a bit of his earlier anger returning. “And honestly, he’s not a bad kid, Smoke; we all do stupid things in our foalhood.”
Smoke rolled his eyes. "Yes, but we got punished for it.”
Bristle shook his head, turning his back on Smoke. “Smoke Strike, in this world, there are two types of people that upset the law… Those who do it because of greed and those who only know how to do it out of necessity for survival.”
Bristle looked back at him with disappointment. “And I’m just not sure I can ever think of retirement, when I’d be entrusting the guard to someone who can’t distinguish the two.”
Smoke stayed silent for a long while. “Sergeant… I-” But he cut himself off, not knowing how to continue on with his words.
Bristle took a long sigh, not even turning back to give him a glance. “Chin up, Corporal, due to your little stunt... Shining is coming in for a cursory check on the academy. I’d advise you to have a little more respect for your superiors today.” Bristle finalized his statement as he walked out the door, leaving the younger stallion to his devices as the door clicked shut.
Smoke nearly sneered, “More respect, always more respect.” He mocked with an eyeroll before gripping the report.
He scanned through it hastily, the edges of his brow curling in response. The letter forced another huff of indignation, and he released a growl before crumpling it up and tossing it to the side. “All of this over my comment on manners?” He ranted to himself.
“I told you, Cadance." I followed after her through the winding hallways of the castle hastily as a scowl adorned her features. It was definitely the first time I’d seen her truly angry.
But even my pleading attempts for her to stop were met with nothing more than her hasty clattering hoofsteps through the hallway, as I just barely managed to keep up. “It’s not that big of a deal!” I reassured her.
She huffed a laugh. “He’s in MY castle for barely five minutes, and he DARES to insult you? That very much makes it a big deal!” She argued back.
When Cadance was discussing the matter with Shining at breakfast, I didn’t expect it to evolve into this. I was genuinely very happy that I’d only told her about his comment on my manners and how he called me annoying. I figured that if I’d told her everything else he’d said, Smoke Strike would merely be pleading for his life at this point. I understood at least some of Smoke’s annoyance, so I genuinely felt bad as I followed her to her study.
“But Cadance, he wasn't wrong... I was kinda being annoying.” I admitted it as she stopped to unlatch the door from the inside. The two guards standing in front of the doorway stepped to the side with a short bow.
As she did so, she looked down at me sympathetically and said, “Kieran, honey, I understand that you’re sympathetic.” She smiled, and I smiled right back and nodded eagerly. But a moment later, she closed her eyes and growled, “Which is why I’m so angry! He upset you so much that you cried! Who does he think he is!?” She ranted before entering the room as the door clicked unlocked.
I stood there in disbelief for a second. “But..! I’m not even upset anymore!”
“Anymore?! How long did he make you upset for?!” Her alarmed voice rang back to me from the outside of the door.
The two crystal guards on either side of me snickered a bit as my face became flustered and I trotted inside. “No! You’re not listening!” I told her hastily.
My words were futile as she was already at her desk writing a report with fury, unbeknownst to even the most unlucky of guards. I hopped a few times on my back legs but could barely make it halfway up the desk. I clamored around, finding another seat and hopping up onto it, placing my two front hoofs on the desk with purpose. “Cadance!” I whined a bit uncharacteristically.
Her ears swiveled in my direction, which was the only indication that she was listening as her eyes burned holes in the letter and the quill wrote feverishly. I cleared my throat so as to try to sound more serious. Though nothing ever made having the voice of a young girl easy to ignore for me, “It’s just a minor disagreement, and blowing things out of proportion will only make the guards dislike me more, Cadance...” I paused, and she didn’t respond. “I know the tricks I pulled were wrong and mean, so let them think of me harshly until I can make it up to them!”
She finally signed her name off on the paper and stamped it before rolling it up and sealing it with the royal seal. My head fell dejectedly, and I sighed. Cadance laid the scroll down and turned to me, “Honey, look at me.” I didn't have to follow her request, as she gently guided my head with her hoof anyway.
Her smile was gentle and bright. “I understand.” She said with a nod, “I understand you; I understand the guards; I get it, I really do."
I huffed, “Then you’re not going to send it?”
Cadance sighed. “Sweetie, when you told me yesterday that he scared you, I was okay with writing it off. But insulting you is an entirely different problem!"
“But-”
She put her hoof over my mouth. “But nothing. Letting them think it’s okay to say those words in my castle, behind my back, to my charge? That’s ridiculous!”
I hung my head solemnly, and she leaned in and nuzzled the top of my head. “And all because a foal may have been slightly annoying.” She giggled. “Foals are silly and clumsy, and they do things that others disagree with.”
I nodded along as she huffed, “And if any guard of mine finds that to be annoying, well, they best keep that to themselves. It is not okay to say those things, and I don’t want you to think that it’s okay if others talk to you like that, Kieran.”
“Okay,” I said with a small sigh.
She lifted my head again. “What was that?” She asked with a raised brow. I smiled slightly, and she booped my nose. “Speak a bit louder, Kieran.”
I giggled and tried to push her hoof away. “I said okay.” I replied a bit louder.
“What? I still can’t hear you!” Cadance said playfully, poking both of my cheeks, “Are these things on? Are they working?”
I laughed at the feeling and futilely tried pushing both her hooves away from my cheeks. One of them found their way to my back hooves, “Oh? Is this on switch down here somewhere, maybe?”
The feeling of her hoof immediately elicited a squeal from me. “Stop!” I begged. Apparently I was ticklish down there, and unfortunately for me, Cadance had just discovered the same thing.
She smiled devilishly before moving both of her hooves down to assault my back hooves mercilessly. “I didn’t find the on switch, but it seems I found something even better.”
I looked at her pleadingly, “No Cadance!” I begged hopelessly.
Her devilish smile grew wider, and I now knew only fear for the creature standing before me. How had I never seen it all along? She was as merciless in her attacks as I’d always expected. The pink witch had returned!
She was calculated in her actions, keeping one hoof steadily on my chest so I couldn’t run as the other one drifted between each of my back legs. “Hmm… which one should I try first?”
“Neither?” I said hopefully.
She shook her head before suddenly saying, “Both!” And that was it for me. She mercilessly tickled the bottom of my hooves. Even going as far as to torture me by going between each hoof with her muzzle and blowing raspberries.
I laughed relentlessly as she attacked, only getting small moments of respite in between the assaults. “Okay okay!” I squealed.
She giggled heartlessly, taking enjoyment in my suffering. “I can’t hear you yet!” She said in mock panic, “Oh no, I need to try harder!”
I waited in horror as she picked me up with her magic and flipped me upside down. Positioning both of her hooves to tickle both of mine. “Please no…” I begged in terror.
“Still so quiet! This should do it.” She announced this before plunging her muzzle into my stomach as her hooves attacked mine mercilessly.
I don’t think I've ever felt so attacked in my life! She forced me to laugh for a long while, not allowing me to kick or do so much as scream for freedom. Until my breath was gone and I was barely able to vocalize, “I… give!” I told her in a last-ditch effort as I panted. “You win.” I huffed.
She momentarily halted her attacks. "Oh, my little Kieran, I heard you that time!” She flipped me back around and dropped me into her embrace. She giggled happily as she leaned in and nuzzled me.
“Of course… you did.” I said in between laughs.
“Dear Twilight,
I do regret having to bother you at such a hectic time of the year, but the best I could afford in terms of waiting was to write you a letter instead of contacting you directly. I assumed it would be less straining on you if it was only a letter.
But besides that, you may have noticed the other reports inside the letter. I also assume you’ve already been informed about Kieran and his entire situation, so I will spare those details. Inside these reports are some rather baffling and completely unprecedented data that I’ve collected whilst undergoing a thorough magic examination on the foal. If you’ll pay extra attention to form F-A through form F-D, you’ll see exactly why I felt it was so urgent to contact you.
I understand that a letter isn’t exactly perfect, but I would greatly appreciate yours and Starlight’s opinion on the matter. I hope that this gives you any extra ideas so that you have a baseline to start with once you visit your family in the Crystal Empire later this week. Inside is a detailed report of the effect these tests had on Kieran as well, and as you’ll see, they are rather concerning. I’ve never personally heard of a body that rejects magic, especially not at such a terrifying intensity that it causes great pain.
Anyway, you know me, I could write about the foal for days. But I think the research speaks for itself. I’ve already spoken with Starlight in depth, so if you have any additional questions, she should be able to help you. Thank you in advance, and Twilight, please don’t wear yourself out this year, alright? Or I’ll make Starlight take your throne for the day.
Your friend, Sunburst."
“Is it enough?” Sunburst asked himself quietly as he paced back and forth in his temporary office. “Did I not explain enough? Did I make it clear how dire the situation might be with my reports?” Sunburst continued to mumble a bit nervously to himself.
He read the page for what felt like the tenth time, finally releasing a sigh as he reprimanded himself. “Well, every second you ask yourself, that is a second wasted Sunburst.”
After a second of hesitation, he went back to pacing even faster than normal with his eyes fixed on the floor. “I need more data; can we really figure it out with just this?” He bit his lower lip. “But no, Kieran deserves to be left alone for now. Cadance wouldn’t entertain more tests anyway; just send the letter!” Sunburst argued with himself, gently hitting the side of his head with a hoof.
He thought back on the conversation he’d had with his wife and something she’d told him quite sternly:
“Sunburst, dear, I want to make this perfectly clear: I love you, but... This may be outside of your realm of understanding.” She told him gently.
“I know, I know,” Sunburst agreed with a sigh. “But there’s got to be something I can do.”
Starlight giggled. “Aside from becoming an alicorn, your options are limited.”
Sunburst smiled slightly. “But if I could just get a few more tests done-”
“No, Sunburst. Just compile all the data until it’s usable, unlike your usual chicken scratch, and send it to Twilight.”
“Are you sure?” Sunburst asked hopefully.
“Yes, she’s busy, but even Twilight would find time to help, especially since it’s so important to Cadance.” Starlight released a sigh. “You don’t have to do everything yourself.”
“Sunburst dear? We’re going out for breakfast; are you coming?” He heard his mother ask from the other side of his door.
"Yes, mother, one second!” He called back.
Fixing his paper with an agitated sigh, he gently folded it up and fit it inside with the rest of the reports. Sealing it shut with his own special sun seal, he closed it, enveloping it with his magic and making it disappear in a plume of orange smoke.
He looked out the window for a moment, fixing the crystal castle with a curious gaze as he mumbled quietly, “You don’t have to do everything by yourself, Sunburst. Some things are beyond even your understanding.” He found that thought humorous and decided that he needed to humble himself more often. “You’ve still got plenty to learn."
A while later, after lunch, me and Flurry were playing video games. Of course, I couldn’t play the ones that required much dexterity, as I tried to keep my grip to a minimum. A quick knock at the door was followed by Flurry’s call, “Come in!” Though she never broke her face of concentration, which involved her tongue sticking out slightly.
The door opened, and Cadance and Shining entered. “Having fun?” Shining asked us.
Flurry nodded as I turned around. “Yep!”
Cadance gave me a raised eyebrow. “You’re not using your hooves, right?” She challenged me.
“Nope, just using stubs to push buttons.” I said with a laugh. Though I was lying in that regard, I was keeping my grip to a minimum but still definitely using it every once in a while. Though I doubted telling her that would go over well.
Flurry paused the game and turned around as well with a curious look, until she saw Cadance, who had on a large scarf and all of her princess wear, like hoofshoes and whatnot. “Are we going somewhere, Momma?” Flurry asked excitedly.
Cadance smirked, “I thought you and I could go out and do a little hearth's warming shopping. Your aunties are all going to be here soon, and I don’t believe you have anything for them.” Cadance told her.
Flurry jumped to her hooves quickly in excitement and bounded over, “Yes! Oh, do you think Auntie Luna will like it if I get her video games?”
Cadance just laughed amicably. “I don’t know, dear; I’m not sure if she’s much into that.”
Shining stepped forward. “And I need to do a final check on the academy; do you want to come with me, Kieran?” He asked with a friendly smile.
I suddenly felt a lot less confident, and my body froze up a bit. “I… don’t know… Maybe I should just go with Cadance? Or stay here… I’m okay by myself.” I mumbled while rubbing my hoof over my fetlock.
Flurry shook her head. “Nuh-uh, girl’s shopping trip only!” She announced this while sticking her tongue out crudely.
I blushed deeply and looked down at my hooves. “Oh… okay.”
I heard Cadance mumble some sort of reprimand to Flurry before wandering over to me. "Kieran, honey, nobody should be alone during the holidays. This is a good opportunity for you to see that not all guards are like Smoke Strike in the academy.” She reassured me as she stroked my back.
Shining came over and leaned down as well. “Yeah! Plus, I’ll be with you the whole time, buddy; nobody’ll mess with you. I promise.”
I looked up at them, both of them giving me warmhearted looks—ones I could trust. Words that I could trust. Flurry chimed in from nearby. "Yeah, Kieran, you should go with Daddy!” she said excitedly as her horn glowed.
I finally nodded at them, “Sure… I’ll go.”
Shining ruffled my hair gently, and Cadance leaned in to kiss my cheek. She backed away, and Flurry hopped up onto her. “We’ll be back later, alright? You two, stay warm!” Cadance said with a smile.
We nodded, and Cadance waved before teleporting themselves out of the room. I was genuinely left in shock by the sudden action, but I guess I should’ve seen that coming. Why take the stairs if you can manifest yourself down them, y’know?
But now I was left with just me and Shining. He was really nice, but other than that, I could feel the growing amount of awkwardness bubbling up inside me. In all honesty, I didn't know him very well. “Well, Kieran, ready to head out?”
I looked up at him and nodded shortly. “Oh, sure." He watched me for a bit longer, and I laughed nervously and gestured behind him, “Lead the way."
His eyes widened, and he nodded. “Oh, of course.” He turned, and we began our trek.
Along with everything that happened with the letters and Smoke Strike… I had no idea why I’d said yes to going with Shining. I want to say peer pressure due to Flurry, but I was the one who accepted. I released a long sigh as the never-ending hallways gave me nothing to focus on.
A few times I’d fallen behind Shining and had to trot a bit faster to keep up. I usually had to be faster to keep up with any older pony, but it was as if Shining was walking faster. I quickly made the assumption that it was a royal guard thing. He glanced back. "Sorry, Kieran, I can carry you if you’d like." He offered.
I shook my head. “It’s alright, thanks."
A few more moments of silence passed as nothing, but our hooves rang out: “Will you be alright out there? It’s pretty cold.” He asked. It was then that I noticed the blue-striped scarf around his neck; it had blended in so well.
I hummed, “Should be; I’ve been colder…” I replied with a shrug.
He laughed sheepishly. "Well, I can’t deny that."
He led me out the front entrance of the castle, and it suddenly dawned on me that I had no clue where the academy was. Now that we were outside, I was really feeling what he meant. I guess my few days spent all cozy in the castle had completely wiped away my memory of just how rough it was here in the winter. I released a shiver before realizing I was falling behind as my eyes widened and I ran a bit to keep up.
Shining pointed ahead at a large building a good way away. It was recognizable by its large clock tower and pointed roof. But the building itself was massive, even from this far away. “That’s the academy!” He said proudly, “Also known as CEGA, or the “Crystal Empire Guardian Academy,” but that name is boring.” He said with a huff of laughter.
I rushed to keep up as I listened, watched where I was stepping, and tried to glimpse the academy all at the same time, which was quite a task. Shining continued on eagerly, “Due to the harsh conditions up here, even Canterlot likes to send their rookies here for training! Some even like it here more and decide to stay.” He said with a proud smirk.
He’d certainly fallen into tour guide mode, but as we continued, I was finding it harder and harder to keep up with the large snow drifts he was stepping over with ease. I had resorted to jumping between his leftover hoofprints in the snow, until I fantastically face-planted and ended up sinking around double my height in snow. My natural enemy.
“Anyway, the academy is where we train all our new-” His voice faded away as I spat snow out of my mouth and shook my head free. At some point, Shining must’ve noticed my absence as he turned around and called out my name, “Kieran! Kieran?!”
“Down here,” I said as he stood right above me.
He looked down in alarm at my predicament, my icy prison. And though his face showed alarm, I could see a smile curling the edges of his lips. He reached his hoof in and scooped me out. "Sorry, Kieran, I hadn’t noticed how deep it got.” He apologized. “Are you sure you wouldn’t like to ride on my back?"
I shook the vestiges of snow from my fur and shook my head with a blush. “I think I’ll take the offer now…” I said this as some snow drifted off my muzzle. He chuckled and wiped the rest of it off my face.
After we’d made a lot more headway, he’d finished with his brief history lesson on the academy. It was quite awkward for me, as the surrounding crystal ponies would greet Shining happily but look at me in curiosity. I didn’t know if they knew I was Kieran or Flurry, but they left me alone either way. “Shining,” I started slowly.
His ear swiveled. “Mhm? What’s on your mind, buddy?”
“How did you end up being a guard? Or marrying Cadance, for that matter?” I wondered genuinely.
He must’ve liked that question, as his smile grew. “Well, my family had known Cadance for a while before we actually met. I was just a teenager back then, but my parents would often leave Twilight with Cadance as a babysitter."
My eyebrows rose. “Wait, so your sister Twilight, ruler of Equestria, used to have Cadance as a babysitter? And let me guess, you both had a crush on each other?” I replied in amusement.
He chuckled deeply. “It was actually Cadance who made a move first! I thought she was so far out of the ballpark that I didn’t even consider her until she confessed one day.”
I poked his neck chidingly with a smug grin. "I bet you still liked her.”
“Pfft,” He spat with a chuckle, “Every stallion at school did; are you kidding me? We’ll just say… the feelings were mutual.”
I laughed, “So how does being a guard involve that?”
He hummed as he cleared his throat. "Well, ever since I was a foal, I'd wanted to be a royal guard. And as I got older, I only wanted it more and more—to protect the ones I loved. Especially back in the day, there was a new problem every week back then."
“Really?” I asked in confusion.
"Yep, there used to be some new threat to Ponyville or Canterlot seemingly on a daily basis. Things mellowed out as Twilight and her friends solved the underlying issues.” Shining chuckled a bit more. “I guess in the end, it was really Twilight and her friends protecting everyone.”
He kept a smile, but it was one where you could tell they were bothered by something still. I tried to clear that thought from him: “You protect Flurry, though. And everyone in the Crystal Empire always says great things about you. I think there’s merit in the amount of respect the ponies here have for you.”
His head turned a little bit. “Are they really that partial to me?” He asked with a bit more surprise than I imagined he would.
I nodded back. “When I was in the uh… streets, I would hear people talk about you all the time! They seem to really respect you, honestly."
He lowered his head to try and hide the large smile, but he chose not to hide it for long as he cleared his throat again. "Well, I'm very happy to hear that. I do try my hardest to keep everyone here safe and happy.” He paused walking for a minute in the busy section of the city. “I may be a guard, but I’m also a prince as well, and these are my subjects."
He looked back at me and said, “And you’re one too now, Kieran, someone else I need to protect.” He paused again as his eyes widened in realization, and he grinned. “Thanks for telling me that, buddy.” He gave me a short nuzzle. I nodded happily as we made our final small walk towards the academy.
Up close, the academy was even more impressive. More like a whole university campus than just a simple training building. Shining brought us up the large steps and through the comparatively massive doors. The inside was more about what I was expecting, though: a couple of guards and a reception room, with a pink mare with blue hair manning the desk. She looked up immediately with recognition and a large smile and said, “Sir Shining! Good afternoon.”
Shining nodded her way before stopping at the desk. "Hello, Miss Aurora. I’m here for an extra check on the academy before the holidays.”
She nodded. “I see you brought a little Flurry as well!” She happily waved at me.
I blushed, as Shining must’ve suddenly realized the predicament I was in and that everyone would call me Flurry. He quickly cleared his throat. “Actually, this is our other little troublemaker, Kieran."
The mare suddenly grew wide-eyed and ushered in multiple bows of apology. “I’m so sorry, you two!”
I knew this was going to happen, so I just sighed and gave her a reassuring smile. “It’s okay; it happens all the time.”
Shining laughed and turned to me, “You and Flurry would make a great tag team for pranks.” He commented, trying to lighten the mood.
I deadpanned back at him, “How do you know we haven’t?” I grinned evilly. “How do you know I’m not Flurry right now?”
He chuckled deeply and shook his head. “Flurry, giving up a position for a shopping trip?! Never!” He countered. He reached back and poked my chest. "Plus, she whines a bit more than you.”
“What? I don’t whine!” I said this while crossing my hooves. He just raised an eyebrow, which elicited a giggle from me.
Aurora cleared her throat after she composed herself a bit. “Um, yes, and now that I’m paying more attention, you both carry yourself very differently. Again, sorry for the misunderstanding.” I just waved her off amicably as Shining nodded, and we finally entered the academy.
On the way through the door and into the first hallway, Shining looked back at me worriedly. "Sorry, Kieran, if I’d thought about that in advance…” He trailed off.
I shrugged. “She didn’t mean anything by it anyway, so it’s okay.”
He nodded and turned back around. “Just let me know if something or someone is bothering you, alright?”
"Mhm." I hummed back happily.
He smiled brightly at me, his voice becoming jovial, before he turned around and trotted in a rather exaggerated prance. "Then, with that in mind, let’s go scare these new recruits, shall we?” I just giggled at the thought.
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Isn’t the guard academy in the castle?
11726320
Nah, the academy is a different place from any previously mentioned area. If you're talking about canon I wouldn't have the faintest idea lol. In this story at least there is indeed a guard barracks in the castle, which I think I've mentioned before? Maybe, I don't know which chapter if so.
Great chapter love it
New chapter!!
Hehehee I like the diving into the snow part...imagining Kieran doing the fox thing whrn they hear mice skurring around under the snow...just jumping into the air then diving into the snow with there back half sticking out when they landed hoves straight out....hehhheheehhehhee
Great chapter as always!
Are ever planning on writing another story besides "A Fateful Flurry" and "Misplaced Wings" ?
Looking forward to Shining and Cadance coming down hard on Smoke Strike. The guy clearly doesn't see what he did was wrong.
I'm surprised that Keiran hasn't done anything to set him aside visually from Flurry. Not a different mane style, no dyed fur, no identifying clothes. I would think him wanting to hold on to his identity and not be seen as Flurry would make that an important distinction for him to make for others so there is no confusion.
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Right now he trying to figure out this new life and Considering he can't even do the basic of taking care of himself and and flurry can do that to a degree he hasn't really thought about it. He has only recently come to terms with his brother leaving him when he died and opening his heart back up. His brother was the only person he trusted before because he didn't know love outside of that. His foster parents did the bare minimum in care for him so love was not there with them. And depending upon how long he was in the system he might have latched onto his brother as something stable in his life. The guard should be old enough understand kids are a pain even when they don't mean to be. Comes with the territory of being a kid.
She's totally in Mama Bear mode. You aren't gonna change her mind. Though, hey; If he'd annoyed Celestia that much, he'd be cinders.
they should have someone get a makeover, maybe asking Kieran if they want to die their hair or something like that.
You can probably pronounce that acronym like...
Riiiiight.
https://recalledcomics.com/MyLittlePonyFriendshipIsMagic12Million.php
Now the town only needs repairs once a month or so.
Frankly the corpal should be gone
Gamer Luna! That is all.
I still think Kieran should dye his hair, maybe cut it too. Get some feeling of individuality.
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I agree! Giving him more visual individuality is indeed the plan. He just hasn't searched it out much yet due to being cooped up in the castle until now, since Shining and Cadance can tell them apart quite easily. Also, a small spoiler: It's something he seeks to fix during this small arc, so it won't be a long wait to see him seek it out.
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Thank you! And probably not on making new stories; maybe a few one-shot stories here and there. I do have some potential sequels for both stories planned, but they're likely all I'll be working on within this fandom. I'm starting to move away from fanfiction other than these two stories so I can construct my own original universe, which I plan on writing books for, and I'm quite excited about it!
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Or like the
emulatornaughty software we're not supposed to talk about..If you are able to expand on these 2 universes that will be great. Do you think you will ever return on fanfiction.net ?
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To wit, in my high school years (and some time after) I used to use ZSNES and VisualBoyAdvance on the regular. And MAME later.
The formal reprimand seems a bit harsh on the surface, but based on the corporal's reactions it seems there might be an underlying attitude issue. So what if a foal fooled around and gave you the runaround, it beats doing drills, right? The oddly held disdain and air of pompousness is quite indicative...
Of course it's naturally going to be difficult to differentiate at a glance, it's just not been a problem because there hasn't yet been a need...
An interesting situation. This could be quite interesting.
Looking forward to the Royal visit!!
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Sadly, it'd be fair to assume that it doesn't have a Cegata Sanshiro...
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He would at least make an effective guard.
Another great chapter, though the use of merely feels a bit off
Given its synonymous with words like just or only it sounds like you're saying that Smoke Strikes situation wouldn't be as bad even though pleading for his life is definitely the worst scenario, I hope I'm not overstepping my bounds saying this but probably better to just remove the use of the word there
It may read better if it was
collected whilst performing a thorough
I know with so much appeal to emotion, I should side with the royal family... but I can't help it.
"Boss abused their power against a poor employee because the said employee hurt the feeling of boss's child"
I just... I can't help it... Poor smoke strike, he's a soldier. His job description is to protect the royal family and citizens with his life, not babysitting the child of his boss.
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That's an odd take, for sure.
Smoke Strike isn't just an "employee"; he's one rank below Bristle, a corporal. I don't really see how Bristle abused his power, like at all? This is a militaristic force, not a simple bodyguard service. Smoke is genuinely lucky that Bristle didn't rip him apart, full drill sergeant mode... That's like saying if a high-ranking official in the army decided to insult the president's kid, they should be let go with absolute zero consequence. Like, no... they'd be demoted at best and, at worst, seen as a terrorist. They're expected to know better than to do that. Of course, I'm not writing Smoke Strike to be some sort of black-and-white, full-evil villain; the guy has his reasons.
You can't really say Smoke Strike is being treated unfairly when the guy literally has a gun pointed at his own hoof, begging the trigger to be pulled lol. Smoke Strike should really take a quick course about consequences and their actions.
With Kieran`s rather unfortunate death and more masculine personality, I would imagine he would be more interested in military matters than Flurry. Who knows? He might take after Shining and organize the army when he gets older...
Thanks for the chapter.
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I agree that if we applied real world standard, he would likely got discharged, beat up, court martial, or all three of those. His boss was was really laxed by human standard, yes.
It's definitely no one but my own fault that I have personal problem with this.
Personally, I just hope I get to see something more... different and alien? This kind of thing didn't actually work in real world. From private companies to goverment agency, we ended up with top positions are filled with charismatic wordsmith phychopaths who had no morale compass. I didn't have faith the royal guard are not filled with phychopaths top brass when they have this kind of work environment.
Again, I think this is my fault that I have problem with this, because other stuffs I felt like you did good so far and no ones complained about this other than me.
Don't burn yourself out and keep up a good work. I cheered for you to reach the epilogue successfully
Me like! Thanks for writing this for us.
Another Great Chapter
Keep up the good work 👍
I've thoroughly enjoyed everything released so far. Keep up the great work!
This story is so adorable and cute but also sad and emotional all while being interesting and I replaced sleeping with reading by accident ops
Its a shame. Its a dam shame. You could have a great story. If only you could step back from making this about purging the darkness in you. can you make your character something other than a suicidal, miserable, psychological dumpster fire? I think I speak for several readers when I say, its been 11 chapters. Up to 15 at this point although Im not sure I can stand listening to the other four. And all its been is a screwed up character thats doing the same thing and not growing a single jot at all. I honestly want to know. How many chapters do you want to make your character a complete psychological mess without a single line of growth or change? Its fine to have a damaged character.......For a while.....But at some point if you want to keep your reader base, you have to have the character grow and change. Unless this is a suicide story. All kidding aside, what you have written is a dam good suicide story. But if it is, and you want to suicide your character like
Ending
by MisterBlonde
Then you kill him off in eight to ten chapters. Your up to 15 chapters. 15 chapters with no change, no growth, no healing, no nothing. Either suicide the character, show some freaking growth and a plot line. And A Plot Line. No crying Actual Story Growth. (Save a midget for christ sakes.) You know, when the character does something other than cry and bask in existential dread..
Monk
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I'm sorry because I don't see how. Name one thing that happened to the character besides his cardboard box, that was not other characters trying to keep him from drowning himself. The entire story is, a suicide prompt, flashbacks to absolute horrors, or supporting characters trying to keep the character from slitting his wrists.
Name a single thing the character does that actually is a plot. Something......Makes a Japanese stone garden. (Story here) Hell, even "A Demon's Second Chance by Perfectly Insane" had the miserable suicidal character killing diamond dogs at some point.
Monk
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It doesn't feel like that to me to be honest, while yes his starting point was, to be blunt, pretty shit in terms of mentality, it feels like a recovery and improvement to his mental state to me. The ills of his past aren't forgotten, but he gets to move on with a loving family.
Another cute chapter, loved Candence going mother gear mode about that Smoke Strike guy.
I also love Shining acknowledging how the land seemed constantly in danger in the show ( that twilight had to save)
I wonder if Kieren will try to dye his hair or something to look more distinct to his pseudo sister Flurry
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I speak for quite a few more readers than you in saying shut, up. Your opinion is yours but throwing such an ugly personality out there declaring a story bad because it doesn't live up to YOUR standards is the sign of a damn idiot.