- Member Since 29th Sep, 2019
- offline last seen Wednesday
Riossumari
I'm here to write fanfics and love ponies, mostly love the ponies. But writing fanfics is still good.
Riossumari
Joined 29th Sep, 2019 ·
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This Riegel is always making his Charisma checks.
I wonder if he'll do as well with his Strength and Constitution checks when Shining Armor or Big Mac show up to forcibly free the mares from Riegel's mind control.
Like woah, still hard to grasp how Jungle Book and that one scene with Kaa inspired an entire niche of fetish decades later.
Trixie and starlight. Then afterwards rainbow dash! This was a good addition to the series by the way!
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Why thank you, was a little worried that it might not get as many likes as the previous stories. Also glad that everyone is giving opinions on who I should use next.
Is this just me? Or does everyone see these large gaps in the story?
Part of me wants it to be Pinkie Pie and Ms. Cake. Riegel now has Luna on his side; she can easily go into their dreams and slowly persuade them to be with him. People are write to write Pinkie as the dangerous one, but at this point, Riegel has gotten stronger after hypnotizing three alicorns total. With Luna going down easier than Cadence.
Twilight could even invite Pinkie and Ms. Cake to the castle for a birthday for Riegel. The perfect excuse to get these two isolated.
This can also bring the previous reason Riegel used on Cadence of "showing her what a better man looks like" on Ms. Cake.
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Let's not forget enthralling Luna gave him a brand new camouflage trick, now he's got more stealth than before at his disposal.
While I haven’t really actively read this entire series (though I plan to amend it afterwards), there are a few things I feel like saying as helpful criticism/commenting:
1. How is it that if Fluttershy was the first one taken, Discord has not yet gotten involved? If it was set before he reformed, I’d understand, but it’s stated in the title of the second story that Twilight is an Alicorn, which means Discord is reformed and Fluttershy is probably the closest thing to a friend he has.
2. I feel like Pinkie Pie and Mrs. Cake should be next, because even if Riegel has three alicorn’s under his control, Starlight was still capable of standing toe-to-toe with Twilight, plus I feel she would know how to counteract hypnosis given her magical expertise.
3. If you ever want a proofreader or want to collaborate on a story, hit me up, I’m bored and want to be able to help others out.
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Haven't really thrown Discord into these stories as of yet because, let's be real. The moment he pops in, its all over for Riegel and that would basically be the end of these stories. I'll probably figure out a way to bring him in at some point, but for now let's just say he's enjoying watching the chaos that's unfolding.
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That's understandable. I'd still like to know what your opinion on my second point is
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Pinkie and Mrs. Cake would be the easier targets for sure, and Starlight would probably be the biggest challenge for Riegel as she has shown that she knows a thing or two about mind control. Course, Riegel would have to employ a great deal of stealth and catch GlimGlam off guard when he makes the attempt. Trixie on the other hoof...well, as much as I like her she'd probably present zero challenge for the ol' snake.
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Riegel could always target Trixie first, and then have her lull Starlight into a false sense of security around Riegel. Like how Twilight did to Luna.
So long as Riegel doesn't kill/hurt the ponies he enthralls, Discord is probably fine with it. That, and, he himself would know it would be an anti-climatic ending if he solved the problem.
Maybe you can do the trixie and starlight story first and then pinkie and mrs cake afterwards.
Also maybe you could have Rigel start enthralling the girls other friends such as zecora or Lyra and bon bon.
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Much as I'd love to do a story with Zecora, the problem is that she always rhymes when she talks and that's super hard to write for a whole story. I'm not opposed to getting ponies outside the mane 6 involved however.
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Fair enough. Yeah I could see how that would be a problem. Eventually I think Rigel should branch out from ponies though. Thanks for the reply!
Still fun to read through! I hope we see the next installment soon!
I hope that Rainbow Dash is soon. Can’t wait to see what Riegel does to her!
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Yes I would love to see that too!
In case you continue this series a different possibility might be the spa ponies for Rigel to nab two at once.
I hope things are going well for you. Still a fun series to read! Stay safe.
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Yeah, I'm fine. Just been busy with my other fic and work. And then most of my free time is gaming. Thanks for checking!
I hope you had a great Christmas and have a great new year!