This is just another human in pony land that I wanted to do for a bit. this is also the very first story that I’ve ever written in my entire life so please I want you to insult me so I know what I’m doing wrong if you see an opening call me a small brain please do so.
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my only concern about the story is when it does this.<I could tell I was struggling to stay at my feet as I desperately looked around.I could tell I was struggling to stay at my feet as I desperately looked around.> gets a little confusing when it dubbles like that.
Yea I Noticed that. It doubles a sentence after I’m done typing it and I have no idea why it does that. Thx for pointing it out
I think this story is great so far, I can't wait to see what more you are going to write.
i have only two problems, one the story has horrible grammar, I am guessing English is your second language.
The pace is a bit fast but that doesn't matter as much.
Dude, do you like, have auto correct on
Like the grammar i can understand, but
"sweet of bell"?
well besides that, good job i guess
“Sweet of bell” Lol
When I am a kid from Texas
Well i think this story has potential!
Keep it up!
Thx SethFilms I appreciate it but if you Don’t like something about the story even the smallest detail please let me know
I truly do like this story, but all of the spelling and grammar errors can make it hard to read at times. Are you currently looking for a proofreader? I would be willing to help out.
Congratulations on your first fic, of course, your writing needs to improve, but you will fix it.
I like the fic, I am sure that with time you will improve, I look forward to the next chapter
very nice story so far, would like to read some more :D
10503610
I am sped