Well this was a fantastic story and you have improved considerably sense you started with this story and I did like many of the twists that you added in this final potion of the story. The combat was interesting and I was happy to see every one with their own moment with Sundance losing his love and losing a lot of friends too. after Sundance's tragedy I was about to roll my eyes when carmine made her confessions Bittersweet only t stab him, it was a very delightful scene. For Mist joining the labors instead of being a mechwarrior is predictable but I wonder if he will still find a way to stay in contact with the others through is new job in mech engineering.

Hazelnut sounds like an interesting character
For the end with Discord finding out that he was having his magic siphon by the ring that Celestia gave him felt much more of a legitimate reason that we would actually turn on Celestia sense this is now actually personal, and sounded much more like his old evil sort, in disregarding all his friendships that he had. I wonder if he actually cares about the wellbeing of Equestria's ponies or will he burn them along with the clans ponies? At least I take it he will leave the government be ruled by ponies and just focus on Celestia and the Clan leader and organization? I wonder if Sundancer and his friends will become his indirect agent of chaos for discord?

The only real part that bothered me what how they managed to 'switch sides' as that part felt rather gargled and was hard to follow who is with who.

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Thank you. I have been trying to plan out my writing more recently instead of just making it up as I go, and I'm definitely much happier with the later chapters. I don't have any plans to include Bistre again in the story, but I guess we'll see what happens. As for Discord, I've got a few plans for him.

Is there a paragraph or two you could quote to show me which part was hard to follow? I had noticed that a while ago during a couple of scenes, but I tried to clear them up as best as I could. I must have missed something during proofreading.

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Freebirth is a slur because clan warriors are genetically modified. Those born from iron wombs more than the rest. Especially Elementals, who are enormous super soldiers. Freebirths are born naturally and often lack augmentation and so are seen as contributing less to the clan as well as being generally inferior. Which is not helped by the fact it’s true as they’re not basically superhuman.