Twilight wanted to give back to the community. That was all, just be a citizen of Ponyville. How so? She thought she could help the Pegasi of Ponyville prepare for next week's big storm. After practicing and mastering a new spell, she though she was ready. But oh, she could not be more wrong.
Good, but you need to work on three things.
1) Space out the paragraphs a bit more.
2) Descriptions. I was reading through this and I didn't get a single piece of imagery.
3) Punctuation.
Other than that, good story.
Oh my god. Amazing. I just hope Raindrop Somehow lives :(
Great story as usual, looking forward to the future chapters.
It was good, but have a bit more description.
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1000598
I'll try to be a bit more descriptive in later chapters. My bad
Accidental mass pony murder...
A bit too dark for me. Sorry.
1004582
It's not for everyone
2 things:
1. when they tell you to get out, GET THE F**K OUT!!!!!!
2.how can she fly?
1009369
Read closer. It says she's got magic-spell wings, the same used to get Rarity to Cloudsdale
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Well I don't see why she feels sad, I bet she got an insane monster kill achievement!
1011028
Tactical Nuke Inbound.
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RAGEQUIT!