• Member Since 26th Aug, 2014
  • offline last seen Last Wednesday

Jedimk Pony


E

Princess Luna is struggling with modern society during Shining Armor's and Cadance's wedding.

Luna gets some unexpected help from Pinkie Pie. Both end up helping each other with problems they are having.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 10 )

I like this a lot. Even before the more recent episodes I always thought that laughter was an aspect of hope and this story kind of gives a glimpse of that.

This was a really good character compare and contrast story and I loved it!

I forgot to up vote when I read this earlier so I came back to rectify that problem.

Really like what you did here. It's interesting to imagine Pinkie Pie to have any worries and doubts, and interesting to see the one who most easily doubts herself give an uplifting speech.

8798731
Thanks for that. I actually had this story written a few years ago.

8798734
Glad you liked it. I have never liked the idea of Pinkie being depressed but okay with her having self confidence issues.

8801728
Thanks I rewrote the ending a few times and expanded Luna's story several times.

Given this is your first story, you did a damn well good job! A nice premise, good flow and very well-fleshed out spon on Pinkie. I'd cut back on Luna's thoughts here and there as they mostly seemed redundant, and I also noticed some grammatical hiccups such as inconsistent tense use and a few recurring errors in direct speech and dialogue tags--But to be honest, I'd be surprised if they weren't there. Can give you some pointers if you'd like :pinkiesmile:

9813017
Thanks for the great words.

I might take you up on the offer. I do have another story I want to post. I was doing my own editing and even though I did over a few months I still missed things.

I

9824819
You’re welcome.

Well, if you want, just shoot me a PM or a comment.

Login or register to comment