From "Analysis Of Popular Legends And Mythology", By Starswirl The Bearded.
An excerpt from Chapter Twenty-Seven, The Hero Who Vanquished The Great Evil.
I sincerely question whether this tale is a legend or myth, but instead may deal with something that truly did happen at one point in the distant past. Before I begin, let me give you a scenario that may help better explain why than a simple explanation.
We discussed, in chapter five, the Boojum and how such a beast could not exist as anything other than a cautionary tale to keep colts and fillies from misbehaving. Let us say, theoretically, that one pony told you that there was a cave nearby that housed such a creature. You would likely consider such a fellow a fool. Then, however, you are told by ten ponies that they have indeed seen the boojum, and that it indeed lies within that cave, and had even spirited away a colt or filly last year, never to be seen again. You'd think that they were likely mad or gullible, and suspect that something else was more likely to have done harm to that young pony. Then, however, if you speak with every pony in the village, you are told that each and every one of the residents have seen the creature with their own eyes, eight hundred ponies in all, and they can give you a detailed description of the boojum, its habits, a list going back three centuries detailing each of its victims, and can even tell you that the creature walked through the middle of town yesterday at high noon, where everypony could see it clearly, before going back to its cave.
Now, in that situation, a rational pony could come up with a dozen excuses for what could have happened that would explain away this "Boojum", but a reasonable pony would also keep well away from that cave if he knew what was good for him. An especially reasonable pony would stay away from the cave after just ten ponies had corroborated the tale. Just because the boojum isn't real doesn't mean that SOMETHING isn't in that cave, and there are many creatures out there that can kill an unwary pony more dead than any fictional boojum ever could.
Returning to the original point of this chapter, I'll now explain why I feel this may indeed have relation to an actual event in the past. The reason is simple: Everyone tells this same story. Every culture, no matter how remote, tells the story largely the same way. From every corner of the globe, no matter how distant, the story is told and told largely the same way. Only a few details are different, and many of those are largely trivial. Later in this chapter, I'll go into detail regarding those varied and admittedly minute differences. For now, however, I shall describe how all of them are alike.
First, there is always a hero. No two species agree on his race, and he is always a member of the race of the storyteller, but the hero's existence is always a constant, and he is always male. He is also never alone: The hero has a magnetic personality, and even if he has a few odd quirks here and there, and is never described as physically attractive, he is so inherently charismatic that he draws others to his cause without much difficulty. And while the his comrades vary in description, they likewise share qualities we shall go into detail about later in the chapter. While other qualities are discussed and vary from place to place, these qualities are always universal.
Second, there is always a "Great Evil". While some stories vary wildly in description, the fact that all the tales describe it as a powerful shape-shifting entity in addition to all the other abilities it possesses, this means that the entity's shape was most likely always in a state of flux, with no set form, explaining that variation in appearance. This matches the appearance of the "Evils" that ravaged the land, until the alicorns put them down. This is appropriate, since these creatures are believed to owe their existence to the very vanquishing of that great evil in the first place.
Third, there is always a magical sword, and a quest to obtain it. Why a sword? Who can say? Perhaps this sword was specially forged for the purpose of slaying the Great Evil. Here, however, the details are almost always universal, to the point that I have only been able to find one variation on the theme, which I will describe to you now.
According to the Goats, after the great hero reached the end of the quest for the weapon to defeat the Great Evil, he was presented with two swords. The first was the weapon that is described in every tale, a blade known as The Sword of Destruction, a powerful blade that could cleave mountains and slay even the mightiest of beasts in a single blow. The second blade is not described in detail, save that it was a strange sword that the hero could not understand, and named only The Sword Of Reason, a contradiction in terms if ever there was one. The hero was told that while the first blade could strike the Great Evil down, it would not truly destroy it, and it would eventually return in one form or another. Worse, slaying the Great Evil would cost the hero his life if he used this sword. The second blade, as strange and incomprehensible as it was, could destroy the Great Evil forever, and without the cost of the hero's life, but only if the hero could truly understand the weapon and utilize its full power. If he could not, the Great Evil would surely end his life in a heartbeat, and there would be no one left to stop it.
The goats say that the hero took The Sword Of Destruction, since he could not comprehend this "Sword Of Reason". Perhaps, if he could have, the world would not have undergone the trials and tribulations that it has since, but he may have been wiser than we think, given that he went with a guaranteed victory over a risky gamble, even if it did cost him his life.
From here, the story ceases its deviation, and continues the same as it does for all races: The hero and his band journeyed to face the Great Evil, and after a long and terrible battle, the hero used The Sword Of Destruction to deal the finishing blow, at the cost of his life. From there, the hero's companions return home to tell the tale to the varied peoples of the world. Et cetra, et cetra.
I sincerely wish that there was more information available regarding this "Sword Of Reason". After all, even with the Evils defeated, we will never be certain if the Great Evil, in one form or another, may not someday return. And even if it does not, there may come a day when an evil may appear that is so terrible that it will require that strange weapon's power to defeat it...
NEW CHAPTER UP!!!
Good Chapter.
Very interesting point in the story, and heh, certainly rather true to constants overall. its usually sword, rarely an axe, never a hammer and sometimes, rarely, a bow.
Why is Starswirl Equestria's equivalent of an anthropologist? Wasn't he a magical scientist/inventor?
Kinda reminds me of "The Hero With a Thousand Faces."
As for the "Sword of Reason", it makes me think of the one thing that almost no hero ever does with the villain: Sit and talk things out, or at least come to an understanding.
7701433
Starswirl The Bearded also knew all sorts of stuff about Windigos, given that he taught Clover the Clever about them. He knew a lot of stuff about a whole lot of stuff.
Simply put, being a wizard is a lot like being The Professor.
7701424
Because axes and hammers are a layman's tools, and the hero is supposed to be above such things. Even the bow is a hunter's tool, meanwhile a sword is just a sword and can only be a sword. Back then swords where made to kill and nothing else. And the only people who would bother to spend that kind of money on a 'tool' that can only kill would have been the ruling classes.
7701466
I'm now picturing Starswirl surviving on somehow, just trapped in a state similar to Bob from the Dresden Files.
7701460
Both have really strong themes of "Campbellian Monomyth" written directly into them, so, yeah, you've hit the nail directly on the head there for my thought process as well.
7701471
May I yell symbolism?
Yes?
Excellent.
SYMBOLISM!!!
7701424 Thor wouldst have words with ye, mortal.
Is this a reference to some of the stuff at Less Wrong?
Hm. If I had a beard, I'd be stroking it in deep contemplation. This chapter is vague and could mean anything from a red herring to "the gun on the wall." It could explain the human as goat, a warning that the real goat is returning soon, or that the Reason is something that new-goat will someday acquire and use is some epic or comical fashion. We shall see...
Minor point: "et cetera", rather than "et cetra". Many may say it too quickly to discern the extra "e", but it's there.
7701494 Hey, i like hammers myself, and there needs to be more hammer heroes, because they are great multi-purpose problem solvers. But so few heroes take up such a powerful tool.
Wooo! Let's get this show on the road!
Loved 'The Name of the Wind' reference here.
Awesome chapter, lots of foreshadowing and interesting questions regarding the rest of the story.
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(Even if you didn't mean to make such a reference, I caught you red handed.)
7701424 Hammers and axes are tools for savages. Unless you are a Space Marine.
7701604 The smurfs will be smurfs there.
I like the lore chapter but how long till we get to are regularly scheduled necro goat?
There's always a man. There's always a sword. There's always a lighthouse.
7701466 It's just a pet peeve of mine that any smart person in fiction is good at all science in general. I doubt there are many professional physicists/engineers who write books about anthropology, especially ones dealing with analysis of the legends of different cultures. Considering the setting had ancient roman tech at best when this was written, I have to assume that months if not years of research were required just for this chapter. This is unfeasible for someone who is known for many other things that don't involve the subject in the slightest and yet would also require decades of work.
As for teaching Clover the Clever, that was probably magic and/or mental things like scientific principles. Einstein taught as a high school teacher for a time, and you know who he was, but I doubt Einstein could write scientific papers on anthropology.
7701433 You forget that Equestria has friendship as a source of magic...philosophy is pretty much a required course here...
Upon later inspection, the Sword of Reason, being as incomprehensible a weapon as it was, became a gun. What sort of gun might you ask? Why, It was simply known as Chekhov's Gun. A mighty weapon utilized by omnipresent authors to expound upon some tidbit of information that will surely be of great importance later on in a tale. Should this mighty weapon never be mentioned ever again, woe unto the author who wielded it! For he has brought forth another Sword of Destruction: DEUS EX MACHINA.
Wait. WTF an update?
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....2 months for an interlude. Well atl east it isn't dead.
7701460
Or "only someone who doesn't want power shall be given power."
Cue drunk Grogar finding the Sword of Reason and using it as a backscratcher, letter opener, or something equally inane.
He already studied under a Buddhist monk to make sure boobs will have no sway over him, so "zen drunkenness" wouldn't be out of character.
Or, maybe the Sword of Reason was meant to slay mundane evil and not capital-E evil. Not everything needs to be symbolic.
Grogar: (drunk) "Behold! I have slain the great Evil that is PAPERWORK!!!"
Bureaucrats: (*and there was much rejoicing*)
Do any other G1 villains appear in this story?
7701747 What is the connection of philosophy and anthropology?
7701900
Fool! Bureaucrats are the source of Paperwork! For destroying their offspring, they shall trap you in Red Tape and leave you there to suffer for all eternity!
Which is why you really need a sword with +12 versus Bureaucrats!
I take it the Sword of Reason is going to be important.
{ First, there is always a hero. No two species agree on his race, and he is always a member of the race of the storyteller, but the hero's existence is always a constant, and he is always male. He is also never alone: The hero has a magnetic personality, and even if he has a few odd quirks here and there, and is never described as physically attractive, he is so inherently charismatic that he draws others to his cause without much difficulty. And while the his comrades vary in description, they likewise share qualities we shall go into detail about later in the chapter. While other qualities are discussed and vary from place to place, these qualities are always universal.
Second, there is always a "Great Evil". While some stories vary wildly in description, the fact that all the tales describe it as a powerful shape-shifting entity in addition to all the other abilities it possesses, this means that the entity's shape was most likely always in a state of flux, with no set form, explaining that variation in appearance. This matches the appearance of the "Evils" that ravaged the land, until the alicorns put them down. This is appropriate, since these creatures are believed to owe their existence to the very vanquishing of that great evil in the first place.
Third, there is always a magical sword, and a quest to obtain it. Why a sword? Who can say? Perhaps this sword was specially forged for the purpose of slaying the Great Evil.}
Link, is that you?
7701489
You might also yell "Most effective weapon of the time".
7701952 Because part of being sapient is the ability to ask questions beyond base instinct questions like "what am I doing here?"
7702064 How is that related to my point of a magical researcher not having the time to write a book titled 'Analysis of Popular Legends and Mythology' back when he would have needed to travel the world by hoof just to collect data.
7702082 Because Starswirl invented the Equestria time travel magic therefore he does have the time to make a book of such things and I am quite literally asking that question whenever anyone says, "Magic I don't have to explain shit."
If it was that simple then Mage classes would be too op...there are rules when magic are used...
see the recent Last days of Magic arc in Dr. Strange
7702145 What does this have to do with philosophy? Your original response was about philosophy, which doesn't seem to factor in.
A guaranteed Pyrrhic victory, but still victory. At least until the next hero is needed anyway. Read: Link and The Hero of Time.
7702052 just thinking that makes me think sword of self destruction not destruction, as for every hero others will paint a villain and both sides seem to lack a solid race. Wonder mere self portrayal or fact they were one in the same.
7701738
Starswirl the Bearded was considered the wisest and most intelligent pony of his time, and was the last pony for a thousand years to create any sort of new magic whatsoever. Therefore, him having more interests than just magic is perfectly reasonable. Heck, consider him like Leonardo DaVinci: A renaissance pony who had a wide number of ideas and creations centuries ahead of his time. DaVinci was a scientist, scholar, sculptor, painter, doctor, engineer, philosopher, inventor, and all around so flat out brilliant that he was literally centuries ahead of his time, given that he designed a primitive helicopter and built a function glider back when men still thought that the sun revolved around the earth. Regardless, Starswirl's brilliant, and more than capable of whipping out a few books based off of just things that he studied during his various adventures.
Besides, in Equestria, "Old Mares Tales" end up being more fact than fiction 9 times out of 10, so studying myth and legend could also be considered a method of trying to figure out which one of these hundreds of potential future perils known only in story will actually turn out to be the next thing trying to eat ponykind's collective face.
FUCK ME SIDE WAYS THAT WAS ALL YOU WROTE?!
I AM NOW SEVERELY DEPRESSED.
Very interesting. Looking forward to more.
Keep up the good work. Deus tecum.
Read through the story from front to back. Finally a Human In Equestria story that kicks ass. Enjoying the humor especially!
Looking forward to the inevitable meeting of Celestia and Grogar. "Come on, Bray, obviously the alicorn and her army isn't going to be friendly. I'll just turn a few hundred thousand of my ponies into alicorns and send them back to Equestria."
"What!?!?" exclaimed the Sun Princess.
Retreating, I waved over my head in supplication. "OK! OK! A million, but that's my final offer!"
"No, no, wait! I can be friendly, really!"
A couple of typos I noted:
wealthy aqnd powerful
In cages to come, they would praise
Now after reading this chapter, many would think that the 'great evil' referenced to return is Brogar. But in truth, I believe that Brogar is the hero chosen to wield the blade in this day and age. Who else would be suitable?
The Princesses?
The Bearers?
None of them could be the chosen, for the simple fact that... they're all female.
Considering the lack of sufficiently suitable male candidates in Equestria, and given the princesses history with the original Grogar, I do believe that they're going to make fools of themselves by presenting the sword to either Spike, Shining Armor... or Blueblood. The one who is chosen will then wield the blade in an attempt to storm the dread realm of Tambelon, only for their assumed foe to prove more than capable of understanding the true nature of the blade.
...after all, Evil always finds a way...
7702064
Leading up to "Where shall we have lunch?"
Also: I know the "Sword of Reason" is most likely logical discourse, but I can't help but remember the weapon named "Reason" from Snow Crash... a nuclear powered full-auto railgun that usually liquefied whatever you pointed it at. "They always listen to Reason."
7701466 pretty that is because he was still a virgin when he was teaching clover, pretty sure that is also how he became a wizard at some point
7702145 That still doesn't work. Just because he can time travel, it doesn't mean his life gets longer. he'd still have to travel there and then send himself back in that spot. His life wouldn't get time stapled on to the end just because he went back in time. his life would be shorter chronologically than it would be if he never time traveled in the first place!
7702205 { A guaranteed Pyrrhic victory, but still victory. At least until the next hero is needed anyway. Read: Link and The Hero of Time. }
Ocarina of Time was my favorite Zelda game ever!^_^
Majora's Mask wasn't too bad either there.
Man Link is such a badass y'know.^_^