Deadpool stood over Chrysalis bed, watching her sleep. He was confronted with a rather difficult conundrum. Once again, he had another job to do. While he had said he would start bringing her along, this job would likely be even more dangerous than previous ones. If he brought her along, she would get hit, likely several times. If she hadn't absorbed his regeneration yet, he would lose her. But at the same time, he didn't have anyone to call on to act as a sitter. And Lady Death wasn't available just now, either. And he couldn't very well leave her alone.
"And for some reason, you refuse to accept my suggestion of leaving one of us to watch her," Crazy complained. "There's no reason to think she couldn't pluck one of us out into her own head."
"We went over this," Stuffy groaned. "You're too unreliable to be left in charge of anyone unsupervised, so we can't leave you here."
"And we can't leave you because...?"
"Because I don't even want to imagine what would happen if Deadpool only had you in his head."
Deadpool sighed. This was actually a serious consideration. Chrysi was too inventive to leave all on her own for however long the job would take - possibly anywhere from a few hours to a few days - but at the same time cashflow was a bit of an issue. Specifically, its absence. He had to take this job. But he couldn't leave Chrysalis alone, nor could he take her with.
As he mused, his thoughts were interrupted by a quiet knock on the door. He rushed over quickly, hoping to open the door before whoever was on the other side started knocking louder. He got the door open just in time to receive the louder knock to his noggin. "Logan?" he asked in shock.
Logan was in his casual clothes; a brown leather jacket, white muscle shirt, blue jeans, and sneakers, his dog tags hanging around his neck. "Can we talk, Wade?"
Deadpool stepped out into the hall, closing the door behind him. "What's up?"
"When Xavier broke your kid's mental control over me, I remembered everything," he replied.
"So...is this where you're going to have it out with me over what she did to you?" Deadpool asked eagerly. "Cause if so, can we take it somewhere where it won't wake her-"
"I wanted to thank her," Logan interrupted.
Deadpool blinked. "...what?"
"Stryker destroyed my life when I got recruited into Weapon X," Wolverine explained. "My body and mind turned inside out to make me into a weapon...do you know how long I've wanted to rip him a new one for all that?" He shook his head. "But I couldn't. He'd been too careful with the mental conditioning."
"And then Chrysi makes you clog dance on his testicles before snapping his neck and stuffing him in a cooler so she can eat him later," Deadpool finished.
Logan nodded. "While not the revenge I would have chosen...it's given me closure for that part of my life." A wicked grin crossed his face. "And since I was under mind control at the time, I don't have to face any consequences."
"Ooh, I like that!" Deadpool said eagerly. "Think we can blame Chrysi mind controlling us for the stuff we do?"
"I doubt anyone would believe it."
"Sure they would! Just paint the eyes of our mask green!"
"I mean, do you really think anyone would believe that we can be controlled?"
"How fast did she wrap us around her itty bitty hoof?"
"Wow, Chrysi has been making some serious changes," Deadpool commented. "That's the third time since she got here that Crazy won an argument with Stuffy using logic!"
"Isn't that a sign of the apocalypse?" Logan joked, having long gotten used to Deadpool's talk about the voices in his head.
"If not, it should be!" Deadpool proclaimed.
Logan rolled his eyes. "At any rate...just wanted to say thanks, and...to call me if you ever need someone to watch her."
"How's today?" Deadpool asked quickly. "Also, possibly tomorrow and the day after."
Logan chuckled. "I've got the time."
"Great!" Deadpool replied eagerly. "Have fun with her and give her love, Logan!"
"I think I can manage that," he replied. "...but you can call me James."
Deadpool froze. "Wait...when you said you remembered everything...you meant everything everything?"
James nodded. "That's right. All of it."
"Whoa," Deadpool replied in shock. "...you still you?"
"I don't know if I'm still Logan," James replied. "But...I'm still Wolverine."
"Stop hurting my brain!" Deadpool whined before charging off to the job.
James chuckled as he entered the apartment. He walked through to Chrysalis' bed side. He sat there, waiting for her to awaken. He didn't have long to wait. As her eyes opened, he smiled at her. "Wade has a big job," he explained. "I'll be watching you until he gets back."
Chrysalis smiled up at him. "Uncle Fuzzy!" she cried happily, lunging up to hug him and nuzzle his stubble.
He blinked in shock at her appellation and enthusiastic greeting, but quickly returned the hug. "So, what do you want to do today?"
"Chase me!" she shouted, leaping from his arms and going into a canine play bow. "And try this time!"
Grinning, he went down to all fours and let out a roar.
Chrysalis let out a playful shriek and dashed off, 'Uncle Fuzzy' hot on her hooves.
The two of them spent several hours racing around the apartment, leaping from wall to wall, at one point even racing across the ceiling. With all his training and experience recovered, Wolverine was even more effective than ever, and he could even feel as a little bit of his energy - quickly replenished - was absorbed into Chrysalis along with the energy of his affectionate regard as they raced.
Towards the end of the race, Chrysalis tried to kick off a window, only to find out it was open as she sailed out.
"Chrysalis!" Wolverine shouted in worry, picking up speed to leap out after her.
He landed braced on the wall at the opposite end of the alley, staring at Chrysalis as she hovered, her wings buzzing.
"So that's how these work," she said, staring over her shoulder at her wings. Grinning, she then zipped off.
Groaning, Wolverine took off after her, only to gasp in shock as he saw her get side swiped by the top of a large truck, splitting her body in half. He raced forward, leaping up to catch her as she fell.
Only her hind legs fell, still kicking. Her forequarters continued to hover with her buzzing wings. "...ow," she muttered idly. "I...need those, don't I?" she asked, pointing at her hindquarters.
"You do," Wolverine replied. "Come down and we'll see if we can't get them reattached." He was relieved that she wasn't leaking fluid from either end. From what he could see, both ends were covered by a green barrier keeping her innards in place.
Chrysalis buzzed down, and he held her hindquarters up to her forequarters. They fused back together perfectly. "That felt weird," Chrysalis pointed out.
"Come on, let's get back to the apartment," Wolverine replied. "I'll order pizza or something."
Chrysalis gasped happily. "Can I have people bits on my pizza?" she asked eagerly.
"I'll cut you some giblets from the freezer," he replied easily. He didn't see much of an issue feeding Chrysalis bits of people. Humans were her prey anyway, since she fed on emotions. And Deadpool killed a lot of people anyway, so at least he would save on food bills.
Chrysalis squealed happily and hugged him. "Uncle Fuzzy, you're the best!"
quiet
open quote wrong
up
YES I LOVE THIIS YUUS MUST HAVE MOREE
EEEEEEE *explodes with squee*
This is the most adorable little people-eating-monster ever.
Wonder how deadpool will explain sex to her?
Too... Much... Adorableness... Going... To... Overload... Need... More... To... Keep... It... Down...
So I'm guessing not only did she absorb his regeneration, but his ability to be dismembered with relatively no negative effects
Ah yes, James Hewlett. Now, if Magneto would go back to being called Max Eisenhardt instead of Erik Lehnsherr.
So now Chrysalis has Deadpool's healing factor? Nice...
5981597 Deadpool must now get her a purple outfit for when he takes her out on a job.
As long as she hasn't drained anyone to death, we should be fine, and as long as Deadpool doesn't know he can pull back the curtain and jump to the next scene by being on our side of the wall, we should be fine... Crap he probably heard me!
Funny and adorable. I love it! Even with the talk of eating people.
5981742 Purple People Eater. Just add Eye-patch.
5981681 not healing factor, its a conditional regen, her body parts that have been removed must be touching and the barrier must be intact. Yes it is a power, mostly reserved for aliens of the insectoid variety.
5981709
He won't do that unless is really needed, he won't want to get canceled after all.
Hulk needs to babysit next.
5981610 It probably won't apply to her. Knowing her, her reproductive biology is most likely the insect kind, so she will start laying eggs out of her oviduct. That is very different from any kind of sex ed he knows.
She was a two eyed, one horned, flying cutie people eater....
5981747 IT'S THE PURPLE SHIRTED EYESTABBER BROSEPH
Disturbingly cute.
I'm only slightly concerned that Chrysalis now has an appetite for humans... only slightly...
...why couldnt my mini kaijins be like chyssy?
oh wait...i remember now, they were all psychopaths...
5981757 How will that get him cancelled?
5981699
Yep! It ruined an awesome scene that I had in my mind where, when Celestia got back from her Displaced Adoption fic aboard the Starship Enterprise, (The Next Generation version, not the Original Series version), she gets placed into the second part of the Season 2 Finale, and sees what Queen Chrysalis is doing to Shining Armor, and has a flashback to the traumatic memories of her dad (or would it be daddy? father? oh well...) Jean-Luc Picard being assimilated by the Borg, and turning into Locutus. While she's having this flashback, she's brutalizing Chrysalis, and acting as though she's reliving one of the worst memories of her entire life, which A: She is, and B: Would raise a lot of questions about what exactly happened to her. AND IT'S RUINED!
We need Lobo here :P
5981910
Breaking the Fourth wall too much gets you canceled. Think Freakazoid and any other animated show were they break the fourth wall a lot.
That was fucking adorable.
5982049 Two things. First, Shining Armor was under the effects of some kind of mind altering spell which is not really changeling-specific. Discord, Sombra, and Twilight have also very clearly used mind altering spells in the show (Sombra's in particular had very similar effects to what Chrysalis did to Shining Armor) and there has been talk of more which were never used. This does not really change the details of this scenario, but it is important to remember that the mind rape is not even remotely unique to Chrysalis.
Second, the changelings do not have a hive mind. This is very clearly established by the way they behave in the episode and further reinforced by the fact that we see changelings talk to each other in the comics. The only reason it pops up so much here is because there are a lot of lazy authors who just want to give their characters enemies they can slaughter without having to deal with the moral issues and psychological fallout of killing.
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The cuteness is too much for me heart to handle! Also any of you lads or lass' know where I can get me hands on a baby Chrysalis plushie or just a normal one?
5982123
I like the "Oversoul" style of Hive Mind for Changelings, actually. A hive of individuals. Each of them are fully capable of independent thought and decision, but at the same time they're all psychically linked through the queen.
Well now, looks like Chrysalis's gonna be a literal nightmare. Because she has Deadpool's healing factor (and possibly Wolverine's), she's gonna be really hard to kill.
5982142 Even that doesn't work because it would render the kind of misunderstandings we saw in the show impossible. Any kind of psychic link would make it impossible for a changeling to mistake a pony for a disguised changeling, but we saw that happen several times in the show so there is no way it is a fluke. Changelings very clearly have a hard time telling a disguised changeling from a pony so there is no way they have a psychic link which would have to serve as an IFF system because you cannot share anything if you cannot identify who you are sharing it with.
5982190 Yeah, there are definitely enough parallels to the Borg to trigger an emotional response in the first encounter, but the two are nothing alike once you look at it in any detail. That does have the amusing consequence of leaving Celestia apologizing profusely once she realizes what happened which could be tons of fun in a bizarre and awkward way.
5982195
The 'through the queen' was my key point there. The queen acts as the relay and focal point for all psychic messages. In a combat setting, relying on the hive link becomes a hindrance rather than a help, as it simply doesn't transmit fast enough for the battle situation. In point of fact, I imagine most Changelings would only use hive communication for checking in, group discussions, or other official communication. For the rest, it's more efficient to just talk to each other.
5982200
Actually, until it was brought up, I hadn't even thought about how Celestia interacting with the Borg would go.
... So how is Deadpool going to react once he finds out his daughter split in half under Wolverines supervision?
And also, Wolverine is awesome! Uncle Fuzzy is WAY awesome!
Whatever he was before, he must have been a hell a lot of a guy... unless it already appeared in one of the comic books I know of and I simply have no idea.
5982221 Making all that go through Chrysalis puts an impossible amount of stress on her mind because there have to be at least 50,000 changelings (100,000 is most likely and 200,000 is the max) under her leadership. You could do a cut down version where there is a spell she has to communicate telepathically with select leaders, but that is not even remotely a hive mind and is something Celestia or Twilight could easily use as well.
5982226 Wait, who? I thought we were talking about the Borg and when I hear "metal head" I think of people that like metal so I am not sure who you are talking about at this point.
5982242
Oh, there is. I just hadn't thought about it yet.
5982250
I never said it was a unique Changeling adaption. Just something that Changelings do.
Of course, it could be that creating the Oversoul was the first step that led to their race becoming Changelings, as powering the Oversoul linkup and network has to draw from something, and becoming emotivores was the most efficient adaption to powering it.
5982388
I'll figure something out.
Well, at least we know what's happening next mission.
Chrissi's going along.
Saw this chapter when the likes were at 666.
Talk about timing when discussing Wolverine feeding Chrysalis leftover people bits.
5982049
Hooray! You have restored my faith in humanity on this day, kind sir!
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This. Is. Awesome! I may be repeating myself but it still applies. I have seen few stories in which each chapter is fave-worthy, but this is definitely one
666 likes.
This story is is Satan confirmed
5982123
To each their own universe.
... the likes...
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I just thought I'd save this moment, and leave it here forever.
5982689 eevviilleee!!!!
Nah, just to godam rawsome to be leagle
Oh shit. She got healing.
In a weird way, this chapter was cute.
5982689
hnnng, my heart