Today I Express My Emotions Through Interpretive Dance
Finally, we reached our destination. At the top of the third flight of stairs, the archon turned towards us and announced, "Central Control is through this doorway. Here, you can receive a briefing on the full capabilities of Santuary, and can initiate the activation sequence for this facility."
Her expression one of confusion, Sparkling Sunset asked, "Activation sequence? What does that mean?"
Making an educated guess, that being that this dream took place in an area of medieval level technology, I put it into terms she might better understand, saying, "The fortress is more than just a place where we can hole up for a while. It's sleeping right now, but it can be woken up, and when that happens we can see everything that this place can do."
"Affirmative," the archon stated, as flatly as ever.
"What do you think it will do, Mister King Sombra sir?" Rosy Sunrise asked, still perched upon my back.
I turned my head around to look at her, and gave her a smile, then said, "You'll have to wait. I'd hate to spoil the surprise." She gave an adorable little sulk about that, like a child being told that, just because it was midnight on Christmas eve, that didn't mean she could open her presents yet. Gesturing towards the doorway to the other ponies, I said, "Let's go. I'm more than a little eager to see what this place can do, myself."
-----------------------------------
Let me tell you something right now: Starswirl the Bearded did not dick around. When he got serious, he was capable of some seriously impressive shit. Case in point: He once opened a portal in space and time to throw three misbehaving sirens out for using their magic to abuse others into another world (Although he might have brought the hammer down mainly because they had dissed his epically righteous beard). But this...
Starswirl the Bearded took the survival of all ponykind so seriously that he'd weaponized a mountain. All of it, or just about.
"The Mobile Fortress, Sanctuary," the archon explained, gesturing towards a hologram of said mountain, the only light in an otherwise dark room, "is designed to be a fully functioning habitat for ponies of all kinds. At its current capacity, it can comfortably house over one hundred thousand ponies, and contains a sizable farm capable of producing food for up to three times that many ponies, if not more. A sizable portion of the interior is not yet excavated, so as needed, more space can be cleared for habitation and production purposes...."
I could hear the mares behind me, save for Rosy, Ladyhawke, and Sparkling Sunset, start dancing. Clip clop clip clop, the noise behind me was quiet, and yet filled with such subtle joy that I was sorely tempted to turn and look, or even join in, but the 3D display of my new toy was far more engrossing. After all, it was a flying fucking mountain. A FLYING FUCKING MOUNTAIN!!! HOW CAN THAT NOT HAVE ANYONE'S FULL ATTENTION!?!
(Admittedly, if it had been one hundred human women dancing, nude, behind my back, I would have spun my head around so fast it would have achieved relativistic speeds, but once again, ass-man, not a pony person.)
"It can fly," Rosy Sunset whispered, wide-eyed, still seated upon my back.
With a small chuckle, I said, "Of course. It wouldn't do much good out here in the middle of nowhere. Fortresses are placed in strategic locations, and this one can be placed anywhere we need it to be."
The archon continued, stating, "Sanctuary also possesses, in addition to a water recycling system, a complex mechanism that allows for the harvesting of water from clouds, as well as a means of obtaining fertilizer from biological waste of almost any kind. The soil in the areas designated for food production were gathered from amongst the most fertile regions in Equestria, and are guaranteed to produce dozens of bountiful harvests before re-fertilization will be needed. In addition, seeds from all manner of plants are gathered in the storehouses, and a crop rotation schedule is available in order to ensure the more efficient means of maintaining the soil's overall fertility. Environmental control spells are also in place to maintain optimal temperatures at even Sanctuary's maximum altitudes, summer or winter."
Very impressive, but that wasn't what I wanted to hear about. This was a fortress, after all.
The mares behind me burst into song. It was a catchy little tune, but I didn't really make a note of what it was about. It sounded like the joyous reprise of a song that they were probably singing long before I'd come along. Still, they were really getting into it...
"What about defensive capabilities?" I asked, calmly.
"Among the strongest on the planet," the archon answered immediately. "The fortress possesses two forcefields, one of which is a passive field that is active at all times, and the other an active field that can be utilized if attacked. The passive field can endure up to one thousand bucks of force at any single point, and any impact will instantly activate the active shield. The active shield can endure over twelve thousand gigabucks of force from all points simultaneously."
"Twelve thousand gigabucks?" Sparkling Sunset asked, her voice filled with awe. "But... the strongest magical attack ever recorded was one launched by Princess Celestia when she diverted the course of a meteorite that would have annihilated Equestria, and that was three thousand gigabucks!"
"The forcefield was designed with that knowledge in mind," the achon stated. "If some evil force were to overtake a princess and force her to harm her fellow ponies, The Architect wanted the residents to have sufficient protection to endure a sustained assault by even an enraged alicorn. Or alicorns."
"Oh..." Sunset whispered, meekly.
One of the mares went into a solo performance that would have made Celene Dion, Madonna, Mariah Carey, Nicki Minaj, Lady Gaga, and just about every other female singer on the planet eat their own hearts out from pure unadulterated voice-envy. Whoever she was, I'd have wished that I could have taken her home and signed her up as her manager: Ten percent from the record deal of the single best female singer that ever lived was still a whole fucking lot of money, after all...
"And offensive capabilities?" I asked, getting a bit excited. We had the ultimate shield. Did we have the ultimate spear to go with it?
"Point defense energy projection is possible via use of specially created magical projectors peppered across the fortress, effective up to one quarter mile of the fortress, and are capable of up to one gigabuck of force. Offensive strikes can also be utilized, through use of specially created projectors, located at thetop and bottom of the fortress. The effective range of the main projectors are limited only by line of sight, and are capable of a sustained blast of up to five thousand gigabucks of force for ten seconds. The cooldown period for the main projectors is five minutes."
The voice of an angel sang, "...And now we're finally... Wait, what did that thing just say?"
King Sombra popped a murder-boner from the great beyond so intense that I was starting to feel a little stiff in places myself. If a beam of three thousand gigabucks could blast a continent-destroying meteor off of its trajectory, then five thousand would probably be enough to wipe a city completely off the map, all the way down to the bedrock. So... not only did we have a forcefield capable of withstanding anything short of the moon being thrown at us, but we also had the means of launching ten seconds of concentrated 'fuck your shit' at anything we could see, and we could see a whole hell of a lot from up in the air, and could do so every five minutes. I could understand why Starswirl had been cautious about who would be allowed up here: Anyone evil who claimed this place would be fully capable of wrecking the shit of absolutely anyone they wanted, anywhere and any time...
And it was now in the possession of the most feared/hated pony to ever walk the earth. I turned to look at the mares, who were now frozen, mid-dance. Given the epic level 'Oh Shit' expressions on everyone's faces, save for that of the little fillies, that fact was not lost on anyone present.
"Well," Sparkling Sunset said, nervously, "it's not like we're going to be using it. Right?"
I gave the unicorn a look, and asked, "Oh? And why do you say that?"
My visage had not lost any of its ability to intimidate, even with an adorable filly on my back. Nervously, Sunset said, "Well, I thought... that we could... use it... to... fly off..." My expression must have been turning steadily more grim and/or dark as she had been speaking, because just the look of my face was enough to cause her to completely stall out, and start sweating bullets.
"So," I began, feeling anger well up in me that I had difficulty in understanding, "You were going to just up and abandon all of your fellow ponies not lucky enough to be here, and fly off into the sunset?" If looks could kill, then Sunset's face would have started melting off from the intensity of the glare I bestowed upon her...
*Huh. And they say that I'm rotten...*
"Of course not!" Sunset exploded at me, suddenly shouting in my face. After a moment, she calmed a little, and then said, "We'd collect every pony that we could along the way, but anypony with eyes to see can tell that the situation is so far beyond hopeless that all we can do is gather the ponies still left and leave..." The way she said that last part, it was clear that she hated herself for saying it...
"And then what?" I asked, calming down, just a little. "You fly off, abandon the continent to the fiends, the boarcs, and anything else that comes to claim it, and then you settle somewhere else. Is that what you want your legacy to be? That when things got bad, you all just turned tail and ran like cowards?"
Sunset looked stricken, unable to answer that question. Ladyhawke, on the other hand, looked... well, she looked like she was on the verge of cheering me on in spite of herself.
"And will that be the lesson that you'll teach your offspring?" I asked, on a roll, and turning towards the other ponies. "That when someone comes to take away everything you have, everything that you've struggled so hard for, that you should just let them take it away without any resistance? And when everyone else in the world learns how easy it is to just come and take what you have, believe me, every petty warlord and wannabe conqueror in the world will start beating at your door, eager to take what's yours." I raised my head up, and gave Sunset a stern look, and said, "Starswirl didn't create this place because he wanted ponykind to run and hide. This is where he wanted ponykind to start fighting back. This is where we seize our destiny, and take back what is ours."
"He's right," Ladyhawke said, looking at me with, surprisingly, admiration. "Hades take me for agreeing with him, but he's right." Looking at the other ponies, she said, "If we start running, we'll never be able to stop: This fortress is too big a prize for someone like Diretusk, or any other villain for that matter. If we run, we prove we lack the resolve to use it, and he and those like him will chase us until the end of time. We have to fight, and we have to win, or we'll never know peace again."
*Surprising. I wouldn't have thought that you'd be so... passionate about fighting for the sake of Equestria.*
'Are you kidding? This is my dream and/or delusion. It isn't going to end with anything lame like 'They all ran away like little bitches, the end'. It's going to end with 'And King Sombra whooped the asses of everyone who got in his way and took over Equestria'. I'm the baddest of all badasses, the king of all monsters, the ultimate evil overlord, aren't I? Why else would they have brought me back? They went to Boot Hill to wake the Saint of Killers. Well, here I am: I won't accept anything short of absolute victory, no matter how many motherfuckers I have to stomp a mudhole into in order to get there.'
*Heh. I could not have put it better myself... but I might have skipped the cursing.*
'And that is why I'm better than you: I don't put a filter on my awesomesauce. I let it flow, free and pure.'
His only response to that last bit was a chuckle...
I gave a small smile, and said, "I could just bully the lot of you into following me. We all know I could, and it wouldn't be all that difficult to do." My grin grew larger, and I said, "But instead, I think we should put it to a vote." I looked over the mares, and found the one I suspected was the owner of the best voice ever: A yellowish mare with neither wings nor horn, but with a long and flowing mane and tail, as well as a stamp on her ass that depicted a g-clef surrounded by little pink hearts. She gulped as I approached, looking up at me with big blue eyes.
"You're the one who was singing earlier?" I asked, keeping my voice as gentle as I could.
She nodded mutely.
I smiled a little wider, and asked, "Can you dance?" She nodded. "The waltz?" She hesitated, and then nodded. "Good."
I turned towards the other ponies, and said, "You have until I finish dancing with the young lady here to make up your minds. Flee, and never know peace again, or fight, and have a chance to take back what you've lost." With that, I lifted the musical mare up, gently but firmly, and we began to dance, with me gently humming the music along.
Yes, I can dance the waltz. I can also tango, samba, lambada, flamenco, and a dozen other styles. I took a class while in college as an elective... mainly because more the half of the other students were female, and pretty fucking fine ones at that...
Gotta admit, dancing with a mare wasn't any different from dancing with a human partner.
As we danced, I whispered, "Your name?"
While she'd hesitated at the start, she very quickly got into the dance, her hoofsteps matching mine quite well. "Sweet Melody," she answered, keeping her tone equally soft.
"So, where would you stand?" I asked, bluntly.
"Fight," she said, without hesitation, a fire in her eyes that I wasn't expecting to see in a pony. "Both of my brothers were at Hurricane's Six Minute Folly, the only family I had left after my parents died. If we have a chance at taking down the fiends, then I'd be the first to charge the lot of them, even if it was only me doing the charging."
I twirled my partner gracefully, and asked, "And the others? How do you think they'll go?"
"Most of them would feel the same," Melody answered quickly. "Just about everypony here is here because raising you were our best hope of stopping the fiends. Even with the chance to escape, I doubt that anypony would turn down an opportunity at a little bit of payback."
*Not surprising. There had to be at least a little steel in this bunch of misfits, for the lot of them to get this far. They've kept at this for an entire year, in spite of all the hardships set against them...*
'I'm aware of that. I'm just giving them a chance to remember it.'
With a final twirl, I broke off the dance with Melody, and turned towards the ponies. Sparkling Sunset, seeming to still be the leader of the group, stepped forward, and said, "We talked it out, and you're right: This isn't the time to run. This is the time to fight. While we can try fleeing later if things turn bad, if we run without even trying, then we may as well give up completely, and just let Diretusk take us here and now."
Smart girls. I favored them with a smile, then turned towards the archon. I said, "You heard the ladies. Let's get this puppy warmed up and ready to go."
---------------------------------------
The boarcs were assembled on the field at the foot of the mountain, making the final preparations for their departure. The assembled hogs went about their work quickly, efficiently, and most importantly of all, quietly. In fact, they went to great pains to avoid making even the slightest noise for one very good reason...
Lord Diretusk was in a bad mood.
All this way, with nothing to show for it. He and his minions could have conquered half of Equestria by now, but he'd been forced to divert half of his army on this fool's errand. Now he and his soldiers would have to march back through the frozen wastes to reach what these ponies considered civilization, and with nothing to keep the little piglet amused. He'd planned on whiling away the hours by tormenting all of his captives. Instead, he'd have to resort to tormenting his minions instead...
The piglet was interrupted from his grim thoughts by the world suddenly shaking. Well, not the entire world, probably, but it was a severe enough earthquake to knock all but the hardiest of boarcs off of their trotters. The tiny tyrant looked towards the mountain, and saw something incredible...
The mountain was coming apart.
Much of the mountain's surface was falling off, like a thin shell. Beneath, he could see a fortress of incredible size. The mountain itself had been about 7,200 meters tall (23,622 ft). The fortress was at least two thirds that size, making it larger than any building ever built by mortals. Regrettably, a rising cloud of dust and debris quickly obscured the massive citadel from sight, but just the brief glimpse he gained was enough to stir a powerful emotion in the heart of the tiny piglet...
"Do want," Diretusk the Cruel exclaimed, looking up at the ascending fortress in awe. He turned towards one of his underlings, and shouted, "Fetch Arabus! You'll find his box in my palanquin! Quickly!"
The boarc nodded and immediately started running. When Diretusk gave a command, then you either ran or you would wish that you had...
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New chapter up!
5819572 I love you.
5819572 finally. a good chapter as well
I would be at a window shouting "Wheeeee!"
yes.
Man, that Fortress power would be impressive... If I hadn't been a Dragon Ball Z author and write power greater than that on a daily basis.
But this chapter was hilarious that's for sure!
If I were up there in the 'Fortress of Badassitude' I'd open fire and wipe those boars off the face of Equestria.
And they have the equivalent of a nuke and two shields that can fly.
They have BOTH the impenetrable shield and the piercing all spear! AND MAXIMUM MOVEMENT!
....So...It's a giant hovertank fortress with passive /and/ reactive energy shields,Presumably pretty good physical armor,and a 'fuck everything in a ten mile radius' energy weapon with a five minute cooldown.....Welp,Let's just hope the Boarcs don't have a few dozen Metal Gears.
Awesome chapter.
I like to imagine that Sombra is voiced by Lanipator.
Just throwing that out there.
Still seeing Chuckles!
This chapter...so good.
IT"S MOBILE! WOOOT!
Stuff to say:
-YES. Our heroes have the ultimate weapon. Now nothing can stop them!
NOTHING!!! AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA... (cough, cough)
-So that's why the "Romance" tag was there. A nice little dance with Sweet Melody...how interesting.... Now I get what the title of the chapter means.
Gotta love Ambrose/Sombra's narration. It's what I love about first-person stories; you get to hear the story from their point of view and understand what they see, feel, hear, etc..
Am I the only one that thinks this fortress mountain is basically Teppelin?
vignette2.wikia.nocookie.net/gurennlagann/images/7/71/Teppelin.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20091220142935
Teppelin is the one on the left.
So they basically have a brand spankin' new Laputa?
5819667 as if that's not what's going to happen here...
MC get's all the ladies: Check
Oh, and right at the end:
It's either a robot bent on assimilation, or a large pig. Hell, maybe it's both
Hopefully the fortress offensive settings other than "Tsar Bomb," because otherwise, it would be easily overcome by infantry.
Also, does it have any way of dealing with biological/chemical attacks?
Not to be a jerk, but at the beginning of the chapter you say 'she' and I have no idea who it is that's speaking. Is it the filly on his head, or the two other mares in the room with him?
Anybody else think of this?
5820080
That was also the first thing i thought about when i read that the whole thing can fly.
Did Laputa have energy shields that could withstand several nuclear blasts without failing?
5820133
Im pretty sure at least the reactive shield is one of those force bubbles like Shining used during the Canterlot Wedding.
5820176 Catch-A-RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIDE!!!!!!
you have thoroughly pissed off the magical horses with a giant death laser, now bend over and accept your punishment
i.imgur.com/DMvkgDg.gif
5820176
YES. I was thinking that the entire time. I just thought I was playing the game too damn much.
..."Gigabucks of force"?
—If that weren't so dammed amusing in just how ridiculous it sounds, the physicist in me would be lecturing you on such thing like that fact that most energy weapons are measured in terms of "energy" and "power" (energy per second), and not "force". I'd probably also detail the energy needed to destroy certain things like mountains and continents, since I possess that kind of technical resource on hand because I'm cool like that and shit. But since it's "gigabucks of force", I can't help you.
...Also, I can't help but bring up this:
What exactly does this even mean? Are we talking about "points" as in "infinitesimally small zero-dimensional mathematical objects considered to possess position but no magnitude nor direction"? Do you mean "12,000 gigabucks of force" simultaneously applied to every single one of the possible infinitesimally-small points on the surface area of the shield? Which, I might add, is basically an infinite amount of force, and therefore logically an infinite amount of energy?
...Yes, I know this is an adventure-comedy in a fantastical setting, but...
img.pandawhale.com/post-10504-cant-deal-with-it-gif-Imgur-VYPG.gif
Fuck you magic, stop being so nonsensical and contradictory bullshit and actually TRY for once!
5820657
It's probably just him adding unnecessary details to it.
Or, he could just change it to a HARD number. Say, like the shield can take X amount of hits before going kaput.
He should also mention if it regenerates.
I'm thinking too much of Supreme Commander here.
Alright, if it's a Hard if X is reached, not before, not after, shield go kaput thing, then that's kinda stupid.
5820657
Let's keep it simple: A 'buck' is a crude unit of measurement (Like rods or a hogshead) used during this time period, equivalent to a 'buck', or a kick from a healthy adult male earth pony, either in terms of force or damage done. Measurements like kilo-, mega-, and giga- have been adopted by equestrians from outside influences, but they still use the old english equivalent of measurements.
This takes place in ancient Equestria, after all, you can't expect them to be fully modernized yet, right?
Anyways, regarding all points at once... consider it like this: A spell encloses the shield in shell, and applies pressure equally all throughout the barrier. Unless the spell can exceed twelve thousand gigabucks of force, it will not be able to break the shield.
A very enjoyable chapter!! Keep up the great work.
I'm getting Dawn of War II vibes...
Sombra needs to say the first part to the archon... modified for the current situation of course
5820222 I think your right about the second shield and I think the first shield might work like Kevlar, any thing going beyond a certain speed, or applying more then a certain amount of force would activate it.
Reminds me of borderlands 2.
5819770
even a dozen of metal gears wouldn't be able to stop it.
5820222
By "overcome by infantry," I meant that the infantry could sneak past the passive shield while the active shield was down. and cause some serious problems (sabotage, release of biological/chemical weapons, set off a magical nuke...).
Who ever made the meme spelled interpretive wrong
Meh
Best story 2015 11/10
5820657
everyone is always satisfied to write it off as magic. (or they leave)
Some story's for me are not mlp fim but is actually.
My little pony magic is bull shit. i just read them because even if there OP it doseint destroy entertainment value. (most of the time.)
5819594 We all do, man, we all do.
It's lines like that that make me love this story. It's off the wall, somewhat crazy, and quite a lot of fun to read. And then you use those amusing Skelator "quotes" just to put the icing on the story. How can I not continue to read this?
That was fun, may I have another? Looking forward to more.
Keep up the good work. Deus tecum.
Well, that seems to be far too easy. It won't be, otherwise this story would be far too short.
Or will the victory be indeed quick in coming, and the rest of the story in seeing how "Sombra" gets accepted?
I wouldn't mind either of those outcomes
Just created an account to follow this awesome piece of work! :D
vignette2.wikia.nocookie.net/anarchyreigns/images/0/09/Torgue_approves_big_zpsea337249.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20140304094344
THE BADASS FORTRESS OF BADASSITUDE!
All I can think of is having him ask whether or not it is space-capable.
I mean, Its already half way to being an epic starship. Just need to make sure it has oxygen recycling (which it probably does) and a hyperdrive, and they could hypothetically run away from anything.
Of course, that goes against the idea of retaliating against whatever threatens you, but still. It would be an awesome genre shift.
5820133
Well, it already noted it has Point defence energy projectors, and a lack of any statement on cooldown suggests it to be negligible.
It's forcefield is probably pretty much proof against anything that can be thrown at it, period. As in, Unless an alpha strike breaks the passive shield with enough overkill to tear through to whatever power core or whatever it has, then the full shield will activate. I don't think it said how long it can run the shield, but I doubt infantry tier weapondry would work. Magic based blasts would take a lot of effort as well, since you would need to throw far more than city leveling power at it. The shield, if hit from one point or all sides will not matter, only total attack force will count.
Biological or chemical attacks are likely useless without infiltration. Usually energy shields are not chemically reactive, being etheric constructs not made of matter for chemical reactions. Explosives being the exception, as they react with themselves or the air to apply energy to the shield. Biological would require you to get it inside and attack the Ponies directly. Given the presence of the Archon, It seems unlikely that infiltration will be feasible. You would need to bypass the passive shield and get inside. Then the Archon, being a guardian that is nigh invulnerable, would probably go and attack you repeatedly until you and the corridor you are in stop existing.
With this whole setup, I can't see many things threatening it via conventional means given what their enemies have available.
Elites, such as Tirek might be able to do something. His power level (give enough time to power up) is sufficient to air-thrust and go through a mountain, and can throw powerful energy blasts. I doubt it would be suffienct to take down a shield however. His own shield projection can likely tank point defence, but might not be able to handle the heavy projector.
However, his special ability to drain magic might be really dangerous. After all, he kinda eats magic. I can easily see him evading the two heavy blasts then parking himself on the shield and draining magic from it continuously. He could probably eat the Archon too...
Discord, well, you can't really say one way or another. I've only seen him encounter a forcefield twice. First time, he didnt really do anything to Twilight and Friends, assuming they were still non-threats.
Second time he was depowered.
fanfics ususally have him able to ignore pretty much everything, period, aside from the elements of harmony or extremely powerful attacks. Similarly powerful shields, especially if they are supposed to be anti-chaos shields are able slow him down, but not stop him.
Assuming he can't just bypass the shield, he will probably be able to tear through it with enough time. Assuming he doesn't get board and do something else.
I don't know enough about the other threats to really come up with much. None of them seem likely to be able to do much however.
If they stick with the Fortress and bombard any enemies with point defense cannons, they pretty much win. The main problem would be how they get the rest of the ponies on-board.
Anyhow, will be fun in any case.
These Skeletor intros are friggin' killing me! I love it!
It's the mountain that in the cartoon Celestia and Luna rule from, isn't it?
6041856
No its up in the northlands, not far from the crystal empire.
Get to the part with the speech of awsomesauce
Play this:
And yet the entire hurricane force didnt use this thing....wut..
5888565 haha, I love analyzing this kind of impossible technicolor magic pony fic stuff, too. It's like riddles that sound like nonsense on the surface, but which have very clever answers. Personally, I don't know how the force fields would react to Tirek, and I don't know too much about Discord at this historical point, but I don't think he'd decide to be an immediate threat with such a large playground and no monitor - I think he'd research before deciding, look around, poke ponies and others, all the natural ability to annoy bubbling up to see who's the most fun to fight or fight beside or watch fight, or turn into mice, or whatever, and he's in the story tags...
Theory; even if Tirek, Grogar, Diretusk, and all described earlier do all go at the fortress right off, I'm thinking too many cooks in the kitchen. They'd end up fighting each other if anything went wrong with the mind control, and I think Discord would find that fun and make it so, freeing the minds of those under control, and probably playing all sides at once. Basically, all of Tartarus on the loose means all of Tartarus vs. all the rest if they can't be controlled by Boarcs.
And Starswirl knew about every one of these baddies. I bet we will see some wicked awesome personalized defend/offense systems.