• Published 19th Jan 2015
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Split Second - wille179



Twilight Sparkle broke time when she got her cutie mark. Now there's two of her with two different talents.

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Love is in the Air

The slush on the ground went squish with every hoofstep. It was a muddy, slick mixture of dirt and half-melted snow that just got absolutely everywhere. Even though the streets of Upper Canterlot were mostly built on an artificial terrace and were paved, the dirt in the little gardens seemed to spill out everywhere. It was as if the very ground was conspiring to make the inhabitants of Canterlot miserable.

Considering that Bakhotir, the Labyrinth Lord of the Minotaurs, was the personification of the ground beneath their hooves, it was entirely possible that the ground actually was conspiring against them.

And then Sparkle dismissed the idea as ridiculous. Bakhotir had more important things to do than make ponies half a world away miserable.

But, as an upset mind is prone to do, Sparkle aimed her anger at the next most likely source of her ire: the pegasi who had made this unusually warm February. She could just picture it: pegasi melting the snow just enough that it turned to disgusting slush while they hovered safe and clean above, only to laugh at the helpless peons below.

And again, she quickly dismissed the idea as ridiculous. Sparkle realized that all her complaining and blaming wouldn't solve the current predicament she found herself in: being dragged off to who knows where by her brother when she'd rather have been studying.

"Shiny, where the buck are you taking me?" she grumbled.

The stallion smirked. "You'll see."

"Then, why are we going out?"

His smirk only grew. "You're a smart mare."

"Shining Armor, you're being ridiculous," she muttered. "How much farth-"

"We're here," he announced as he turned into a store.

Sparkle looked into the shop - a jewelry store, to be specific. Just six months ago, they wouldn't have been able to afford anything in here, not that they had needed jewelry. But now...

The necromancer followed her brother over to a specific display case. Inside were hundreds of bejeweled metal bands, all glistening brilliantly. "Can I help you, sir, madam?"

"In a second," Shining Armor told the salespony. "Sparks, see any that look good?"

She looked into the case, and then something in her mind clicked. These were marriage bands, which meant only one thing: "You're going to propose to Cadance?"

"Clever girl," Shining Armor answered. Addressing the salespony, the knight said, "I'm proposing to my marefriend and I want to get her a horn band that she can show off. The thing is, she's richer than I am, so sheer opulence isn't what I'm going for. I want something that really fits her."

The salespony nodded in contemplation. "All right. What colors is she, mane and fur? Is her horn blunted or sharp? How long is it? We'll start there."

"Pink fur with pink, purple, and butter yellow mane. Sharp and 1.6 hoof-lengths long,” Shining easily replied.

The salespony took a second to picture the pony Shining Armor described. “I’m guessing your mare looks a bit like Princess Mi Amore Cadenza, then?”

Shining Armor smirked. “Oh, you could say that.”

The salespony nodded. “Right, then I have just the thing! Over here, we have a...”


The two siblings arrived at their apartment two hours later and six hundred bits lighter. As they approached the door, Sparkle’s protective wards kicked in. But, as the two of them were recognized by the magic, the wards then stood down and let them through the door. Had they been anypony else, save Thorn and Cobalt, the wards would have, at first, kept them from looking at or caring about the the room.

Sparkle pushed open the door, causing another compulsion charm that warded her apartment against thieves to brush against her mind before it too ultimately left her alone. Magicing off her robe, she hung it on the hook by the door and continued on inside, Shining Armor right behind her.

The mare turned back towards her brother. “Oh, I never asked - where are you taking Cadance for dinner?”

“I’ve had reservations at Morning Mist for months. I’ve got everything planned out. I’ve got my suit, I’ve got the meal, I’ve been reading up on cheesy romance novels - you know she loves those - and now I’ve got the ring. This date is going to be perfect!”

A loud thump interrupted whatever Sparkle was about to say. Next to them, a chained up door rattled noisily. Behind it, a sickly moan drifted through the reinforced wood.

“Shut up, Z! I already fed you this week!” Sparkle yelled through the door.

The rattling stopped and a wet shuffling sound took its place. A short, higher-pitched moan drifted through the door.

“That’s it, Z. Good zombie, go back to your corner.” Sparkle chuckled. “Anyway, I’m glad for you, Shiny,” she told her brother.

Shining Armor was not looking at her; rather, he was looking at the door that “Z” was behind. “Sparks, why exactly do you have a zombie in there? I thought I told you I didn’t want those in the house. They’re gross and smelly. Actually, how long has that one been in there?”

She laughed nervously. “Eh, I’d say about a month. I just forgot to put his restraints back on and refresh the silence spell.”

“Why do you have him?”

“Well,” she began, “Since last September, I’ve been wanting to perfect some rituals to increase the strength of other ponies’ bodies without causing them to accumulate corruption. The ritual itself works, and I’ve had it in its almost complete form since before Hearth’s Warming, but I wanted to practice it so that I could do it without hurting a living subject. I practiced it on Z.” Her horn darkened; there was a loud thump and then Z screamed his unholy scream. “I haven’t been able to put him down yet, which says a lot about how good my enhancements are.”

“Well, why don’t you just cut the magic animating him,” Shining Armor suggested.

“That would defeat the purpose of testing the ritual’s limits, now wouldn’t it? Besides, I wanted to see if there was any last minute adjustments that I needed to make before I gave it to you as a birthday gift next month.” She blinked. “Shoot, there went the surprise. Happy Birthday?”

Shining Armor frowned. “You were going to cast dark magic on me?”

“Only if you wanted it, and only once I knew it was safe,” Sparkle defended. “Besides, I know you and Cadance liked my first little surprise.”

Shining was almost afraid to ask. “First little surprise?”

“Wait, you didn’t notice?” Sparkle asked, genuinely surprised and a little offended. “The little healing factor? The increased muscle mass and density? The stamina boost? I know you used that last one every time Cadance came over. Did you think that was all natural? Shiny, please.”

The white stallion groaned and face-hooved. “Of course. Is there anything else you’d like to tell me?” His eyes narrowed in annoyance as he looked down at he sister.

Sparkle, despite now being equal to him in height, felt much smaller as she shrank back. “I may have used a spell to help you think faster and used a little mental conditioning to prevent you from panicking on the battlefield. Little things to keep you alive in your dangerous job.”

For a moment, his glare intensified. Then, without warning, the angry mask shattered as Shining Armor broke out into a big, goofy grin. His horn lit up and his magic pulled Sparkle’s head forwards, where it met his hoof for a friendly, sibling noogie.

Sparkle pushed away. “What? I thought you were mad at me!”

“Yeah, I’m mad that you did all that without asking me, but you did it to protect me, right?” At Sparkle’s nod of agreement, Shining’s smile widened. “See? I can’t blame you for looking out for me.”

Sparkle relaxed, thinking she was going to get away scott-free.

“Although, you still need to be punished for doing that.”

And nope.

“What!”

Shining Armor chuckled menacingly. “Oh yes, I’m thinking... no peanut butter ice cream for a month.”

“WHAT! But that’s your favorite, too!” Sparkle loudly protested. “If we don’t get any, you won’t have any either.”

“Nope. You’re going to have to watch me eat both of our servings. Won’t that be fun? Muahahaha!”

“You monster!”

“Hence the evil laugh. Muah. Ha. Ha.”


“AHH!”

Shining Armor tumbled out of bed, desperate to get away from the zombie standing over him. A split second later, he found himself pressed against the wall as the zombie shambled closer to him.

“Goo.. mormim... Simy... Armor... Spa’uh... ma’e... bre’fah,” the tongueless zombie slurred. Good morning, Shining Armor. Sparkle made breakfast, the living stallion mentally translated.

He looked towards the door to his room and saw a clear path of escape. “Rightgottagobye!”

Z was left looking in confusion at the spot where a pony once stood not a second ago. The zombie’s animating magic wasn’t very sophisticated, so it rectified its confusion by deciding to return to its maker. The reanimated pony turned and shambled out of the room.

Meanwhile, Shining Armor found himself besieged by a horrid smell, and it wasn’t coming from the remarkably whole zombie shambling up behind him. No, it came from the pan in Sparkle’s magical grip. “Hey, Shiny, I made your favorite: brussel sprouts and alfalfa!”

Shining Armor stared at the abomination in his sister’s pan. Some might claim that she was a good cook, but when she willingly made his most hated foods, all her credibility went out the window in his eyes.

“You know, I thought about making rose omelets,” - his favorite - “but, since he ate all my ice cream last night, I thought that he could use something a little healthier for breakfast.”

“You! This is revenge for the ice cream?”

“I need my peanut butter and sugar, Shining Armor. If you don’t let me have my fix, I’ll make your life miserable, starting with daily wake up calls by Z over there.” The zombie in question chose - for a certain definition of “chose” - that moment to bump into the stallion from behind.

“AHH!”

“You know what to do, Shiny.”

“This means war,” he replied resolutely.


“OW!”

“Hold still, you big baby!”

“Owowowowow! You’re pulling too hard!”

“I’ll be done faster if you’d just keep your head still.”

With a mighty tug, Sparkle’s comb plowed through the thick tangle of knots in her brother’s mane, sibling warfare temporarily set aside. The stallion, now suited up, was about ready to head off and pick up his marefriend from the castle. Sparkle was just putting the finishing touches on his mane, straightening out the normally unruly mess.

A moment of awkward silence fell between the two of them, so Shining Armor decided to fill it with small talk. "Have you seen the headlines?"

"No, I haven't," Sparkle replied as she worked on a particularly stubborn knot of hair.

"Princesses Celestia and Luna have announced that they - Ouch! - are officially dissolving parliament because of the sheer - Ah! - corruption they found in it," he said between grunts of pain.

"Really? And here I was, excited to use my new nobility to get into politics. A shame, really, but that was to be expected," she mocked. Sparkle pulled the comb once more, vanquishing the final knot. “And... There.” Sparkle set down the comb and released her brother from her magical grip. “You ready, BBBFF?”

“As I’ll ever be, LSBFF.”

Sparkle smiled. “Well then, go get her, and don’t forget the ring.”

He plucked the ring box from his jacket pocket, showed it to her, and then tucked it away safely. “Don’t worry, I got it.”

“That you do, Shiny. That you do.”

The stallion trotted over to the door, grabbed his wallet and his apartment key, and opened the door. Much to his surprise, Cobalt stood outside, hoof raised as if he were about to knock. “Oh, Cobalt. Come in.”

“Cobalt?” Sparkle looked up and saw the two stallions switch places. Her apprentice trotted towards her as Shining Armor closed the door and headed off to the castle. “What are you doing here?”

Cobalt was, surprisingly, dressed similarly to Shining Armor, with a full suit and tie. “I wanted to ask you something. Tonight's Hearts and Hooves day, after all, and I was wondering...” He swallowed visibly. “Ms. Sparkle, would you like to go on a date with me? As... as my marefriend?”

It was like a bomb went off in Sparkle’s head. A million thoughts and emotions exploded in her mind, far too jumbled to be coherently described in words. The resulting mental chaos left her gaping like a fish. “You... want me to be your marefriend?”

He rubbed the back of his head nervously. “Err, yeah. I mean, yes, I would love that.”

Sparkle’s hind legs gave out beneath her, dropping her to the ground with an audible thump. “Cobalt, I’d love to, but-”

“But what?” the assassin said, fearing what she was going to say but knowing it anyway. As he trotted over to her and sat down beside her, he said, “The geas? I don’t care. That I’m your student? Why does that matter?” He wrapped a foreleg around Sparkle’s shoulders. “I don’t care, Twilight Sparkle. I... I love you.”

“Cobalt... why did you have to say that?” Sparkle asked. “Now this is going to be even harder. This is is why I can’t be your marefriend. Cobalt, would you kindly inflict mild pain on yourself for three seconds?”

He never had a choice in the matter. The magic of the first geas around his soul activated, digging through his mind, making a decision, and acting upon it, all without his consent. His lower lip curled inward on its own, and his teeth clamped down on it without his control.

It was exactly as specified: mild pain for three seconds.

And at the end, when he finally regained full control of his body, Cobalt was still confused. Seeing this, Sparkle elaborated. “What if I wanted sex, and you didn’t? What if I wanted you to do something painful and humiliating, and you didn’t want to do it? I could make you do anything I wanted you to do, even if it were beyond your physical and emotional abilities. Cobalt, that kind of power is bad for relationships. I don’t want that in my love life; it makes me really uncomfortable.”

“Then don’t use it,” the earth pony mage replied. “It’s that simple.”

“But it’s not. Even if I didn’t use it, we both know that I could. You’ve been subservient to me since day one, but love is about being equal.” The mare sighed, and then looked Cobalt in the eye. “I’m sorry, but no. And that’s final.”

Cobalt slumped down, quite disappointed with the turn of events. He’d know it was a possibility, of course, but that didn’t mean that it didn’t hurt any less.

“Hey.”

Cobalt perked back up.

“We can still go to dinner tonight. As friends, mind you. But...” When she failed to come up with any other words, Sparkle settled for this: “Yeah.”

“I’d like that, Ms. Sparkle.”

“We’re friends, Cobalt, you can call me Sparkle or Sparks, if you want. No more “Ms. Sparkle,” alright?”

“Of course, M- Sparkle. Just Sparkle. Heh, that’ll take a while to get used to.”

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