Mares and Chaos, part 1 [History Overwritten]
The sign above her head listed the intersection as that of Cherry Street and North Avenue. That put Sparkle and Cobalt about ten blocks from the street that had been burned into her memory by that mysterious stallion’s card. Her home, however, was in the opposite direction, as were Thorn and Shining Armor.
The stallion standing beside Sparkle, lacking both the address and a reason as to why they were teleported, however vague, asked, “What just happened?”
“We’ve been teleported,” Sparkle stated.
“I get that,” he replied. “What I want to know is why.”
“I wouldn’t know,” the necromancer replied. “It doesn’t matter. What does matter is that my student just murdered four ponies in public, Red Fields, including his mother.”
Red recoiled as if he had been slapped. “You... you know who I am?”
“Since you killed the chicken. You did it too easily and with too much skill for a normal pony, and you didn’t protest at all. And I never ordered you to do it, either,” Sparkle explained. “I had a spector tail you; I saw you get the orders to kill me.”
“I didn’t have much choice... Please don’t kill me, Ms. Sparkle.” He dropped into a deep bow, his face firmly planted on the ground. “I never wanted to do it! If I didn’t kill that mare, she would have made me kill you!”
“Relax, Red, I’m pissed, but not at you.” A hoof rubbed through her mane and she sighed. “I’ve known about the assassination plot for a while now, long before you got involved. And I know those stallions were the ones to hire your family to do the job. Obviously, you solved that problem for me.”
“So... does this mean that I still get to be your student?” He asked hopefully.
“On a few conditions,” the unicorn replied. “First, your next geas will include a loyalty clause to assure that nothing like this ever happens again. Second, you will learn the proper way of killing somepony with magic for your future assignments; what you showed in there was sloppy at best and idiotic at worst.”
“Um,” he interrupted, face still on the ground, “I’m not exactly employed anymore.”
“I know,” she acknowledged. “Third, you will work as my assistant. I’ll pay enough for you to keep a roof over your head and your belly full, but you should learn to live frugally. You will get more if you earn more. And finally, you will answer this: what do you want me to call you?”
“What?”
“I’ve done some digging; you’ve painted yourself every color of the rainbow and had a name to match. Who do you want to be with me?”
He replied, “I would like to be Cobalt, still. I’m done with Red Fields.”
“Then stand up, Cobalt. I-” She stopped. Cobalt looked up to see a colony of rabbits floating by their heads. “What?”
One of the rabbits stopped moving and opened its mouth wide. From it, a fish swam out, despite the fact that it was clearly air that it was swimming through, as well as all the other impossibilities. The fish then pulled out a sign from nowhere and held it up with one of its fins. The arrow on the sign pointed east.
“Am I seeing things?” Cobalt asked, quite worried and confused.
“If you’re seeing a fish that just came from a floating rabbit, then I’m seeing the same thing,” she replied.
“Ah, ok. Just checking.”
Sparkle looked around and was quite dismayed to see that reality and logic seemed to be out on lunch. Buildings floated, colors randomly changed, the night suddenly turned to day (blinding them) before going back to night a few seconds later pink clouds filled the off-color sky, and the scent of chocolate filled the air.
Sparkle darkened her horn to cast a true sight spell, but then stopped quite suddenly. “That’s odd,” she said.
“Miss, your nose is bleeding!” Cobalt suddenly exclaimed.
Sparkle raised a hoof to her snout, and then pulled the now blood-covered limb away. “So I am.” She frowned. “That’s worrying.”
“What is?”
Sparkle answered, though her voice was distorted as she was magically pinching her nose to stop the blood. “The true sight spell has a defense mechanism in place; if you see something that hurts you to look at, you won’t be able to end the spell correctly. The little bit of time magic involved wouldn’t complete the spell when you cast it, so the spell defaults to uncastable. Whatever I would have seen would have been that bad to look at.”
“We should run, then?” Cobalt asked, his muscles already tense and ready.
“Running is good.” They turned and galloped away as fast as they could, tearing past a gray pony standing on the sidewalk.
The fish, meanwhile, rolled its red-on-yellow eyes. “Silly mare,” it muttered, “you're going the wrong way.” The chaotic guppy disappeared in a flash of light.
"No, that’s not possible!” Sparkle exclaimed after rounding a corner and yet again ending up on a street that wasn’t supposed to exist there. “Where the buck are we now?”
“Language, Miss,” Cobalt said, a habit he picked up from Sparkle and Thorn. “And it looks like we’re on Saddle Way. If it doesn't move, Hayseed Avenue should be up a few blocks that way; we can use that to get closer to the guard barracks.”
Sparkle looked back over her shoulder. Sure enough, just like all the streets before then, the road mysteriously dead ended less than a pony’s length behind them. With still no other option but to move forwards, Sparkle agreed. “Good thinking. If we do manage to get on to Hayseed, there’s a place I want to see first.”
Cobalt asked, “What is it?”
“Dr. Ocsid’s Books. Wait...” The puzzle clicked into place. “Dr. Ocsid, Discord. Shit.”
“Bravo! She figured it out!” a new voice called out, familiar to Sparkle alone. “I wondered when you would get it.” The draconequus materialized before them, his serpentine body wiggling and twisting about through the air.
“What is the meaning of this? Why are you doing this, Discord?” Sparkle cried out.
“Hellloooo, Spirit of Chaos, anypony? It’s what I do,” Discord explained. He appeared behind Sparkle. “I’ve been trapped in stone for a thousand years, aware of every last boring second. Your little antics gave me the strength to break out early. For that, I thank you.” He bowed excessively, curling up his body several times in a tight spiral.
Sparkle wanted to reply what was on her mind, but held her tongue. Everything she knew about beings as powerful as Discord told her that she was only safe as long as he was having fun; if he got bored, or heaven forbid, angry, she would be broken in seconds. Instead, she said, “You’re welcome. I look forward to seeing your gift.”
Now brandishing a giant foam finger with the words “Sparkle is Best Pony” adorning it, Discord said, “That’s the spirit. You’re not like those silly little element bearers, are you? Well ta-ta! There’s chaos to wreak.” The spirit vanished quite suddenly in a flash of light.
“You met him before?” Cobalt asked.
“He was a pony at the Gala,” Sparkle said, already trotting off. “Come on. Let’s go find whatever this thing is before he gets bored with us and decides to start scrambling our brains.”
“Would he really do that?” Cobalt asked. “He seemed nice enough.”
“Flip a coin, then you’ll know. Logic and reasoning go out the window with him, or so I’ve heard. The only thing he answers to is chance.”
Cobalt hummed thoughtfully, and then picked up his own pace to catch up with his teacher. Floating behind them at the same time, invisible but in no way gone, the clone of Discord silently snapped his fingers and conjured a note to a certain individual, visible only to the same, and magically stuck it to the top of Sparkle’s head. A second later, the clone Discord properly departed.
Hayseed Avenue appeared relatively where it was supposed to be, although the road they had just came from left them a dozen blocks further south than it should have. It put them, quite conveniently, within the 300’s block. From where they stood, there across the street they could clearly see a bookstore labeled “Dr. Ocsid’s Books (For all occasions).” As they crossed the street and entered the store, the sign slowly faded away, replaced by the business’s original title, “Dusty Books’ Rare Tomes.”
Adorned with an open sign despite the late hour, the door opened with the jingle of a bell. Sparkle and Cobalt entered the place of business, and were swiftly bombarded with the scent of dusty books, just as the real sign proclaimed. Piles and piles of books crowded the floor, leaving only a narrow path to walk through. The absolute normalcy of the place was both striking and reassuring, considering the nonsense just outside.
“Hello?” a stallion called from the back. “Are you customers?”
“Maybe?” Sparkle answered hesitantly. “We were given this address by somepony we just met.”
“New customers then! Come on back, and mind the stacks.”
Shrugging, Cobalt went first through the narrow path between the ceiling-high piles, followed closely by Sparkle. One stack in particular caught her eye, with titles like Military Grade Weapons Enchanting and Principles of Advanced Runic Design. It struck her that some of the books here might be of a dubious nature, and her intuition suggested that if these were the type books kept out front, the ones he had in the back would be far more dangerous.
When they finally had navigated the paper maze, she and Cobalt came upon a unicorn stallion with his nose buried in one of his own books. “Hello there. Dusty Books, the eighth, at your service. Need a rare book? Look no further than my humble shop. If I don’t have it, I probably know somepony who does. Now, how can I help you?” he said, all the while never looking up from his book, and, if the motion of his eyes were any indication, without even halting his reading.
“I saw a book on enchanting, so I’m going to guess that you have a lot of magic books, right?” the orange-painted mare inquired of the reading shopkeeper.
“That I do,” He said, still reading.
“Well, I’ve been looking for a pair of books to complete a very interesting series I’ve been reading. Books six and seven, to be precise.”
“I’ve got many interesting books, many of which are sixes and sevens. You’re going to have to be a bit more specific.”
“They’re written by horn, have pages of genuine parchment, and bound in leather. Over a thousand years old, but in remarkably good shape.”
The book Dusty was reading snapped shut. He sighed. "You’re one of those customers, aren't you?” He sighed, obviously quite exasperated. “Look, I don’t deal with those kind of books. You won’t find a shop in Canterlot that does. I've never seen a book like that. Now, buy a normal book or get out of my shop.”
“The text moves according to the whims of the demon that lives within the blood-soaked pages.”
The stallion’s fur visibly stood on end. He gulped. “I have no idea what you are talking about. You should leave.”
Sparkle turned, but did not head for the exit. Instead, she trotted to the door to the back room, acting on the instinctive urge that had been growing over the last few minutes. “Not yet. I have to look.”
With surprising agility, the stallion lept up and over the counter, narrowly avoiding knocking over a stack of books, and assumed a threatening stance between Sparkle and the back door. Over his head, he brandished the book he had been reading as if it were a blunt weapon. “I can’t let you go back there.”
“Try and stop me,” Sparkle declared, answering the challenge. Her horn was already darkening as she spoke.
She stepped forwards and slipped past him, even as Dusty swatted in vain at the time-delayed image of her. There, on the pedestal that stood alone in the center of the room, was the sixth Dread Necroptica, Pain.
‘Hello, Mistress Sparkle,’ the text on the cover spelled out as she picked it up, courtesy of the demon within. ‘I knew you would find me eventually.’
“How much?” Sparkle asked.
“It’s not for sale,” Dusty Books growled at her. “Put it back and LEAVE.”
“Money is no object,” Sparkle replied, ignoring his command. “How. Much?” she asked forcefully.
“And I told you, it’s not for sale. Now get. Out. Of. My. Shop!”
Sparkle tsked with her tongue. “Mr. Books, I assure you, one way or another, I will be leaving with this book. Now, you can sell me this book at any price of your choosing, or -” and here the inner structure of Sparkle’s neck disintegrated into black smoke, allowing her to rotate her head far more than should have been anatomically possible, “- I will take it by anything up to and including lethal force.” She smiled a smile that promised nothing pleasant and flared her grating, sinister magical presence. A potted plant nearby withered and died. “I assure you, Dusty Books, that I can make you suffer for as long as I like.”
“Maker damn it,” he swore. “I need that book. If I don’t give it to her, she’ll kill my family!”
“Who?” Sparkle demanded, turning to face him completely.
“...” Dusty only answered with silence, though he tried to stab her with his pointed glare.
Pushing her dark magical core further outwards, she increased the pressure on the room and on the other ponies souls (Cobalt, unfortunately, being caught in the indirect crossfire). Dusty, being weaker in constitution and more sensitive to the foul energies than Cobalt, went weak in the knees and collapsed on the ground. “Who?” Sparkle demanded again.
Again, Dusty answered with silence, which made Sparkle question if his silence was entirely of his own choice. However, somepony else willing to kill to get that vile book was bad news indeed. Thus, the necromancer felt justified in what she was about to do.
Her horn darkened. A second later, she was seeing herself through his eyes. As delicately as she could, she turned inwards and started traversing the web of associations that made up his mind, looking for the withheld name. She found the name - Sweet Dreams - and the associated face easily enough, as well as the reason for his silence. Swiftly, she broke the psychic block in Dusty’s mind and returned to her own head only two seconds after she had started.
“What?” Dusty exclaimed as he felt the block fade away.
“Vampires can really mess with your head,” Sparkle explained. “Here.” Her horn darkened once more, wrapping the bookseller in a similarly black aura.
When the spell faded, Dusty was once more standing and very cross. “What did you just do to me?”
“Protection. Your blood is now the foulest of poisons and will burn any that taste it to ash. Touch those you call family to protect them as well.” Sparkle smiled, this time more warmly. “Now, how much for the book?”
“Thank you, but it’s not for sale.”
The still orange-painted necromancer rolled her eyes. “Too bad,” she said as her body dissolved completely into smoke, taking the Dread Necroptica with it. A tendril of smoke shot out and ensared the silently observing Cobalt and dissolved him as well.
The formless pair shot backward, heading to the front of the store. Cobalt rematerialized with Sparkle at the front door. “Are you sure?” Sparkle called back, giving him one more chance to sell it to her.
“No! Wait! Please!” the stallion cried from the back room. “Don't take that book!”
There was a thump, and then the sound of thousands of pages falling together accompanied by a loud thud and an “Oof.” Then, there was a still silence.
It stretched on.
“Hey, Sparkle, shouldn’t Dusty be here by now?” Cobalt asked.
“Buck.” Again moving swiftly as black smoke, Sparkle and Cobalt worked their way back into the stack maze. What they found...
Dusty was lying face-down, buried under his own books. But worse was the pony-like figure standing atop the spilled pile and pony within, visibly holding the soul that had been within Dusty’s body a second ago. Death.
“Put him back!” Sparkle yelled, though a tiny voice in the back of her head reminded her that this normal-looking mare that she was yelling at was Death herself.
“I can’t do that,” she replied. “Dusty Books the eighth is already dead; his neck snapped when he tripped over his own books. Chasing you, I might add. Good one. Another for the tally, it seems.”
“But his soul is right there!” Sparkle argued. “I can fix his body. Most of his brain tissue is still alive, too!”
“And what would you give me for his soul?” Death asked.
“I-”
“Yours? You were involved in killing him, as was Cobalt. No, that won’t do at all.”
“Wait! I’m sure there’s something-”
“Time’s up.” Death tilted back her head and swallowed Dusty’s soul whole. She looked at Sparkle with a smug smirk, but it quickly faded as she looked at Sparkle’s distraught expression. The goddess sat down, uncaring that she was still atop the pony that she had just reaped. “That was mean of me. I’m sorry.”
“Sorry? If you were sorry, you would have put his soul back!” Sparkle argued.
“Sparkle, his soul was one of those that would have passed on to my realm in an instant had I not been here. There was nothing you could have done anyway; don't beat yourself up about it. Besides, I’m here to see you. Or, more specifically, to get this from you,” Death said. Her horn darkened, and the note from Discord that was attached to Sparkle’s mane came loose. Sparkle watched it float over with some confusion as to why it was there in the first place. “So that’s what Discord wanted. Fair enough.”
Death folded the note and vanished it to who knows where. Her eyes gazed upon the book Sparkle held. “The Dread Necroptica. Do you mind if I speak with it for a moment?” the dark goddess inquired of the mortal mare.
She passed the book to her without a word. “Hello, Smarty Pants, how have you been? Sparkle treating you well?” The book’s pages rustled, almost in a laughing manner.
What.
Her childhood ragdoll had the same name as a demon inside a book.
What.
It wasn’t even a question, just a flat declaration of strangeness. Outside, reality was being torn apart at the seams by Discord, and here she was boggling over the fact that a demon and her currently specter-possessed toy shared the same name.
She really had to get her priorities straight.
“Don’t worry about Discord. Beatrix and the other elements will get him straightened out soon enough,” Death said, as if reading her mind.
“That’s a relief,” Sparkle admitted. “Um, if you don’t mind me asking, what did you mean by ‘tally?’”
Death chuckled. “I can feel how many deaths of a sapient being were caused by any soul. It helps me find their place in the afterlife. I’m sure you’re curious about your tally? And you too, Cobalt?”
They both nodded.
“Cobalt, you hit seventy today, and Sparkle, you have two hundred and sixteen dead by your hooves.”
Sparkle stepped back, bumping into a stack of books as she did so. “No way. You’re wrong. There’s no way I’ve killed that many ponies.”
“Indirectly, yes. Sixty of them were the followers of Silver Tongue, who he drained of life to fight off your curse. Obviously, it didn’t work. Another twenty four died by events you set in motion, though you weren’t aware of the consequences of your actions and had no malicious intent,” Death explained, ending with a soft chuckle.
As she passed back the sixth Dread Necroptica, Sparkle asked two last questions. “You told me once that you were from the future, right? How many do we kill before we die?”
Death’s ever present chuckle grew into full-blown laughter, as if Sparkle had told the funniest joke. She laughed and laughed. She pounded her hoof onto the ground, not caring that there was a dead body between the two. She snorted and guffawed and splattered the two mortals with blood. When she finally calmed down, Death said, “Ahh, let me put it this way. The Dread Necroptica can only be read by those it deems worthy, and you two, as well as Thorn, are probably its most worthy readers ever.”
Her ear twitched, listening to something only she could hear. “Damn, time’s up. Sparkle, listen, read page fifteen and learn it soon. Like, now soon. You’ll need it within the next few hours. Until we meet again, Cobalt, Sparkle.”
She vanished. There was no light, no smoke, and no sound. Death was there, and then she wasn’t.
Only then did the psychoactive magics that Death radiated clear from their minds. “OH, MAKER! WHAT THE BUCK WAS THAT?” Cobalt yelled. “TELL ME THAT WASN’T JUST THE BUCKING GRIM REAPER!”
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*examines the Tumblr spoilers* Oh. Well now thats interesting.
5684654
The scene is a whole lot funnier if you know everything that's going on.
5684659
Death is future Sparkle, the Demon actually is the same specter as Smarty Pants, she wrote the Evil Books of Evil, Sparky messed with time magic and is getting messed with in return, she quite possibly spawned, was, or knew the Nightmare and I'm still half convinced Discord swapped Twilight and Sparkle between time lines.
How close am I?
5684676
You're on the right track.
Yes, Death is future sparkle. Yes, the demon is Smarty Pants. No, she didn't write the evil book; she convinced Sombra and his colleagues to do so and the stuffed smarty into the book (after upgrading him). Time is messing with her, but many of her time-travel adventures are because she was summoned. I'm not exactly sure how the nightmare fits in (haven't gotten that far). And Discord didn't swap any ponies; he just convinced them that they belonged to the other side.
Celestia damnit!! Why cant I like this story more than once!!
amazing chapter
5684774
Thank you.
(You could follow the tumblr blog instead.... *wink wink hint hint*)
5684804 I shall now register and keep updated, thanks for the link
5684804 Followed
5684817
No problem!
Remove the 'the'.
Either 'OK', or 'ok'. Personally I would prefer 'okay' but that is up to you.
This is not indented.
I don't think 'intuition' works here like you want it to. If you want to continue to use it, may I suggest "her intuition suggested that if these were the type books kept out front, the ones he had in the back would be far more valuable/interesting/dangerous."
Missing quotation marks.
And now I wait. Again. This is currently my favourite ongoing series on this site, and I love how often you update it.
But it still is not enough. Maybe I will think up some tumblr questions.
meet the grim reaper after getting help from the embodiment of chaos himself? All in a days work for Sparkle!
5685003
I launched it myself. I'm a writer for Tv Tropes.
5684855
Thank you. I've fixed these now.
5685178
You're allowed to. I double checked the rules to make sure.
It will be quite interesting to see how Cobalt ends up.
5686006
static.fjcdn.com/pictures/U+jelly+from+the+newest+episode+hearts+and+hooves+day+http+wwwyoutubecom+watch+v+lc9jygk0qci+this_a59760_3298208.jpg
5684769
...
So...
You're saying that was actually the Grim Reader?
5686068
*Snickers quietly*
So, those bald ponies...having read the spoilers, I guess they are members of something like a time-conserving agency, making sure that the apotheosis of Death happens as it has to? And the 'shard' is Sparkle, as she is a part of future Death? That should make the vines and her future body also shards, or would that be Thorn and the two--and maybe even Cobalt, given what Death said in this chapter--are gonna merge at some point?
Aside from that: My yes. Take them. All. Love this.
Smarty Pants XD
Dear god, this is so good
5687069
Close, but not quite.
Oh, good. I'm glad there's actually an explanation as to why Sparkle and Cobalt (okay, mostly just Cobalt; Sparkle doesn't seem like she'd really be fazed by this) would react that calmly.
I may have been spoiled by Discworld, but I am of the opinion that one can never get enough Death.
Well, except for that new Death in Reaper Man. Wasn't sad to see him go, and I highly doubt I'm alone in that.
You evil little fucker. Y'know the section of that blog that says it ruins everything? It's haunting me like a curse.
I almost scrolled further. Was he being sarcastic? I'll never know.
I ended up shutting off my phone and throwing it. How am I supposed to sleep now?! I hate you so much!
Wanna, like, do it?
*pokes Tumblr with a stick*
You hid the ask button!
It is seldom good to be on a conversational basis with Death, though it does depend on the temperament of the Death in question.
And the spirit in the books is named Smarty Pants? That...can't be a coincidence. Well, I suppose it might, just seems unlikely.
5688342
It's under the the description on the left side.
I forgot to ask earlier: you never mentioned what Death looks like in this chapter. I'd guess that he used the 'harmless' appearance, but we know he knows that Sparkle can take his real appearance and that he has a reputation for not caring about mortals. Or maybe his reputation is greatly exaggerated because most ponies only meet him in a bad mood because some idiot just summoned him?
Gods, I love so much this story!
Keep'em coming!
5688780
His reputation is somewhat exaggerated. If you summon him for nefarious purposes, he's going to be mad, sure. Otherwise, he just picked up some of Celestia's trolling tendencies. Of course, a troll with little regard for death (the action) and little respect for the bodies might come across as more malevolent, but Death isn't a bad person.
And yes, this is normal-form Death.
5686250
I'm glad I can entertain you, oh mighty bringer-of-words.
5696193
Yes.
5696185
In my mind, there are a few dozen necromancer and maybe 50-60 self-sufficient dark mages of other types still alive (or undead) and within Equestrian borders. The vast majority are imprisoned, either in Canterlot high security prison or Tartarus. There's maybe two or three active dark mages, and none are necromancers like Sparkle. There are others outside of the country, too.
As for Red Claw, it's best to think of him as a piece of exposition rather than a character. He wasn't meant to be "satisfying," but to exist and inform the audience of what Sparkle was like. Future antagonists will be more fleshed out.
5699996
Of illegally acquired money for murder and the use of outright prohibited magic. Even laundered, you don't go flaunting it.
5699855
No. She utterly destroyed the clerk's self-worth and incited a riot. He chose not to dodge, and the rest of the ponies died in a resulting fire that she didn't start. End result is the same, even if she did nothing but speak a few sentences.
5699800
(3) Sparkle doesn't advertise her abilities. The only ponies that know much of what she can do are the guards, who get a different treatment each class so that the resulting rumors conflict and sound more nonsensical, and those in the fighting ring, who see her pseudonym and only illusions. Ponies only know what the rumors are, and, since mind-control conflicts with the standard worldview of ponies, they subconsciously dismiss it.
And she did add extra features. They're just well hidden.
Yes, Cobalt, that was the bucking grim reaper. If you're going to be Sparkle's apprentice, you're going to have to get used to this kind of thing happening.
5686078
5686012 i0.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/148/870/1310480582695.jpg memecrunch.com/meme/UCI/y-u-so-jelly/image.jpg
5707904
Because Twilight, the inventor of the phone, does not have that many bits and Sparkle is there to help sell the product. Sparkle is just taking advantage of the fact that there are two Fancies to get the phone patented on her side as well.
5711410
Just identity recognition, and it's not infallible.
So she agonizes for a week over whether or not to kill one innocent; and eventually refuses risking her life and foregoing 700 million bits; but she's willing to torture and kill an innocent for a book she doesn't even need anymore as she's now lined up for lessons with the books author?
5711539
These are books written by some of the most powerful black mages ever, including Sombra, who conquered an empire by himself; she can't let it fall into enemy hooves. And she was willing to pay. She would have given up most of her fortune for that book.
In my opinion, she was just bluffing. She would have stolen the book and erased the store owner's memory of her and the book rather than kill him.
Alright; I wanted to get to the end before I made an overall comment, but here it goes.
Sparkle is capable of:
Crossing timelines.
Taking on a battalion of elite Royal Guards.
Mind controlling a street/ shop full of ponies on a whim.
Spying on several hundred people simultaneously through her specters.
Seeing through any disguise.
Confidently transfer one soul into another body, without practice or any apparent need to study.
Self-impregnate through magic without any need for sperm.
Cause a war between six vampire covens just by her presence.
Has an undead dragon who is capable of slaughtering an entire colony of diamond dogs, heal Rarity of grievous wounds and add 20 years to her life.
All at the young age of 18; and yet until recently, she wasn't able to feed herself?
Let's pretend though that this makes sense; and you have a super-powered prodigy living in the slums barely getting by. Wouldn't you think that if Card Gambit had been planning this rebirth ritual for years, possibly since before Savior was born; would have done more to bring Sparkle under his wing/ power; and worked to endear him to her etc, or at least give her time to study and prepare for this ritual instead of kidnapping her a week before?
And then he actually paid her a sum that exorbitant instead of killing her?
Because I hate it when I get dislikes and don't know why; I'm going to be honest and say number 13 was me. I like the setting and the basic idea of it; and keep reading hoping it will be better but I just keep finding the logic flaws too hard to deal with. If you can come up with a good explanation for this, I'll change to a like.
5684769
So is death still 'male' then?
5711615
Are these books all one of a kind?
Also, didn't Luna say she wrote them?
5708632
Alright; that makes sense.
5711637
Most books on dark magic are one of a kind, but there are more than just the Dread Necroptica. Luna did write some books, but not the DN.
5711634
In the sense that Death has a penis? Yes. Just wait and see.
5711625
Before I give you my justification for an admittedly weak plot point, I'd like to point out a few things about Sparkle's power set in relation to the canon Twilight Sparkle.
-TS can mind control ponies: Lesson Zero w/ smarty pants.
-TS can transform six ponies into breezies with a spell she read once. The soul transference was much simpler at it's core; Spaekle just added some extra features to make it better.
-Sparkle had a copy of Saviors DNA with her, recoded on his soul. She just skipped the sperm step and went straight to fertilized embryo.
That aside, here's my multi pronged justification:
1) Sparkle has some morals. Growing up with a guard brother and a paragon-of-the-light sister, she tries to limit the use of her ability.
2) Sparkle doesn't advertise her power. Very few ponies know what she can do.
3) who would want to hire a dark mage, when history says all dark mages are untrustworthy? Card captured her brother and legitimately offered that money so that she would do exactly what he wanted.
4) She only recently (within the past 5 years) got good at her talent, being almost entirely dependent on finding books for her education.
5) (I've expanded on this one more on the ask blog) powerful unicorns have to eat a lot to control their magic, and this is Canterlot, the city of inflated prices. Enough money to eat well as an earth pony or a pegasus isn't enough money to eat well as a unicorn. (This headcanon came entirely from that one scene of twilicorn pigging out on burgers and fries.)
6) The lack of a specialized, official post-cutie mark education or apprenticeship denied Sparkle an opportunity for most jobs. And through the noose-like laws, she couldn't even get a job as a permanent DADA teacher.
7) She's been to court before, numerous times, for trying to escape the city. Those fees add up.
Sure, she could have eaten herself to the size of a whale had any of those things been different, and there is stuff she could have done to change that. However, this pony, on some core level, is still Twilight Sparkle, who's first instinct is to follow the law.
Meh, that's my justification. I still think it's a bit contrived, but whatever. That's over now.
5712622
I'm going to presume that a soul transfer is a difficult spell; and Card Gambit seems to assume she can do it, meaning he recognizes her power. A powerful mage, struggling to make ends meet, who feels emotionally isolated would be the ideal candidate that anyone with sense would be trying to recruit on a permanent basis.
For instance he could have someone burn down their house, make sure she got blamed for it so she'd need to be further in his debt than she could hope to repay. Or, more personally, make something happen to Shiny with big medical bills. Start giving her well paying, legitimate work that she's willing to do; incorporating her in team of people who will respect her and be friends (or possibly more). Actively have people looking for dark magic books that can help her. Have her kill some guilty person, but make sure you have evidence you could convict her with. The list goes on.
If I needed to take guess at how to justify this; I'd try to put some more space between the castle/ meeting Luna, and the stuff that happened after, and make it clear that the books Sparkle found there dramatically increased her power; and only after that did the vampire clans/ Card Gambit notice her.
Also, is there anything coming up that would say Sparkle needed to have gotten 700 million bits, rather than lets say 2 million?
5712622
Also, if Twilight is ridiculously rich and has morals; is she going to do anything like, fund an orphanage for these kids dying empty of all but despair and being resurrected as zombies, that keep showing up?
5712540
... I'm thinking project Savior doesn't go according to plan.