My Little Short Stories

Two stories that I've made. Dash's Lifestyle and Are You Afraid of Love, all of which contain Rainbow Dash! :3

Chapters (2)

Dash's Lifestyle · 27th Dec 2014 · 769 words
769
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Are You Afraid of Love? · 27th Dec 2014 · 2,232 words
2,232
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Comments ( 14 )

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Cheesey Microwave

Cheesey Microwave #1 · Dec 28th, 2014 · · · Dash's Lifestyle ·

Too short, too rushed, poor grammar. Find a proofreader- or, if you want a review, join a review group.
*cough*
*join this group*
*cough*

TheRandomMLPegasister

TheRandomMLPegasister #2 · Dec 28th, 2014 · · · Are You Afraid of Love? ·

Yes, I know. Rushed as it is it's still clear. Poor grammar? Oh I'm sorry I haven't learned any of that grammar. I try to do my best, thank you for your concerns. I'm sorry that I'm being snappy, but I know. I've just started and am trying to figure out how this works, alright? I'll fix it later. Oh and too short is called a short story. I was in a rush to get it finished. Also I don't want a proof reader I want to learn how to do it on my own so that I know that I can do it.
Again sorry for being snappy, these comments just bug me off.

Christs Disciple

Christs Disciple #3 · Dec 28th, 2014 · 1 · · Are You Afraid of Love? ·

Okay, the first one was alright. This one felt like it was just being forced to being this long. Now, if I may offer some advice, when you switch who is speaking, you should start a new paragraph. For example This,

Three days later I was at Rarity's house, visiting. "Well I think you looked just divine with your mane and tail up, darling," Rarity told me. "No you're not putting my mane up ever again," I said firmly. "But . . ," Rarity started, but I shook my head. "No means no," Rainbow said. There was a ring of the bell above the door. "I'll be there in a second, darling," Rarity called. "Stay here, darling, while I see what he or she wants."

should be this

Three days later I was at Rarity's house, visiting. "Well I think you looked just divine with your mane and tail up, darling," Rarity told me.
"No you're not putting my mane up ever again," I said firmly.
"But . . ," Rarity started, but I shook my head.
"No means no," Rainbow said. There was a ring of the bell above the door.
"I'll be there in a second, darling," Rarity called. "Stay here, darling, while I see what he or she wants."

Also, that bold part should be "I".

TheRandomMLPegasister