(This crossover is gonna be about a player I am in one of my pokemon games, so bare with me please.) Yukama Jace was in Driftveil City when a mysterious shockwave came from then Deerling lab in the woods. She decided to see if they needed help from the shockwave. When Yukama got there, all the scientist and deerling were outside. They had 'accidentally' created a portal when doing research. How they did it we may never know. Yukama decided to go into the lab to try to contain the portal even with all the scientist tried to change her mind. She had gotten too close to the portal and got sucked into a bright world with pastel colored Ponyta and Rapidash, as well as some sort of flying Ponyta. That's all she saw before see blacked out.
Chapters (2)
Hope you like!
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I'd love to know what you'd like to see in the story and feel free to make requests!
I'm just curious about this so, here it goes. Why all the hate?
If you're gonna dislike the fanfic, can you please comment on why you didn't like it so far? It would help me and my proofreader/editor improve the fic so you can enjoy it.
Shamalamb218~
P.S. For all reading this, I've had writers block and personal stuff going on, but do not fret, I am working on the 3rd chapter right now
(AKA I'm working on most of it 
)
You might want to ask your Editor to check the chapters again because there's still some spelling errors
about the dislikes it could be for a lot of reasons....for example those who doesn't like Pokemons crossover , or because of the spelling errors
also i didn't quite unterstood something in the description. The main Character "Yukama Jace" is one of your OCs right ? because if your readers feels like the fic is going to be a self-insert......well the result won't be pretty.
If i can give you an advice , i'd like to talk about the "heads-up ( '..........' ) " that you talked about in the Author's note .
Keep in mind that your readers are supposed to know exactly what's going on when they read a sentence , they must be able to recognize who's talking or who's thinking what , without you saying : so i'm gonna use that when a character is thinking .
So it would be better in this case to use Italics for example i'm thinking : i'm giving you an advice here
and that's all , i'm sorry if i've been mean or harsh with you
Your title is terrible. Try a title that doesn't have the "My Little __ : ___ is ___" format, because that turns people away.
4880398 No, you haven't been harsh or anything. I'll be sure to check that stuff over, as well as change the heads-up thing. I'll be sure to talk about it with my proofreader/editor to. Thanks for the feedback.
~ Shamalamb218
4880405 Thanks for the warning. I'm most likely going to change it. It was more of a, 'what am gonna call this' kinda thing. But I'm not to great with titles, so don't be surprised if you still don't like the title name.
~ Shamalamb218
After reading the first chapter, I can understand why some people dislike this. While there are very few grammatical errors, the writing and word choice feel off. Here's an example:
The main character got over the fact that they were talking to ponies very quickly. And they got over it because the ponies looked confused, which is odd. Your writing feels like this the whole time as well, making it difficult to stay engaged in the story.
These were just my first impressions. The more you write, the more comfortable your writing will be, so don't stop just because some people don't like it. There will always be someone waiting for another chapter.
4880419 you're welcome , keep writing
The thing i dont like about this is the chapters are way too short if you make a longer chapter then i will be happyer
4883362 Got it. I'll try making longer chapters now.