My Little Sly Cooper: Thievery is Magic

by Deyeaz

XVI - Grave Mistake

~My Little Sly Cooper: Thievery is Magic~

Written by Deyeaz

with the help of the ever-brilliant Alex Rite

XVI - Grave Mistake

Sly walked down the pathway of the castle towards the east wall. After agreeing to steal something for Discord, he explained to Sly exactly what it was. Discord had wanted Sly to steal a special spell from a vault on the top floor, a spell that Celestia held dear to her. Discord had said that he didn’t know what the spell was, but that was the exact reason as to why he wanted it: to explore the scroll’s contents, bury himself in them and learn what's inside. He had also said that he didn’t know anything about the security on the top floor.

Sly thought that the draconequus’s information was less than rudimentary. But his chance to become bipedal and normal once more was at stake. At that moment, Sly had been torn between accepting the request and declining it. But in the end, he did what he had to do, and accepted it.

“For a being who’s supposed to know everything,” said Sly under his breath, “he sure doesn’t know much....”

Sly ran over to a pipe that ran up the wall. The blue stealth auras assured the master thief that the pipe was safe to climb. A smirk curled around his lips as he shimmied up the pipe. Sly had made it up about five stories when, to his shock, the blue stealth auras on the pipe disappeared. “What?” Before he had time to figure out what this meant, the pipe began to break. “Crap!” As the pipe bent over, Sly noticed an open window in front of him. With no time to spare, Sly jumped through the window just as the pipe outside snapped in half. Sly looked out the window and watched the pipe plummet to the ground, thankful that he hadn’t fallen with it. Sly stopped there for a second to catch his panicked breath.

“No sweat, Sly,” he said to himself, heart hammering against his ribs at a mile a minute. “It could have happened to anyone. You’re the greatest living thief from a long line of great thieves. You can do this.”

His confidence now returned, and heart rate regulated to its normal speed, Sly stalked over to the door of the room. He poked his head out and took a look each way for guards. When he was satisfied that there were none, he proceeded to find a staircase to the top floor. As he snuck around he looked everywhere, which unfortunately lead him to walk into something.

Or, as luck would have it, someone.

Standing in front of Sly was a white unicorn stallion with a mane and tail of many shades of blue. He wore gold and purple armour, making it obvious that he was a guard. The armour had a crest that surprised Sly because it kind of reminded him of Twilight's cutie mark. By the look on the unicorn’s face, he was as surprised as Sly that they had bumped into each other. The unicorn smiled a bit though and helped Sly up.

“Sorry about that,” Sly said, trying not to arouse suspicion. “I'm, uh, new here, so I, uh, came to the castle to...”

“If you’re here looking for a job as a castle guard,” said the unicorn, “I know where the sign ups are.”

“Yeah, that's exactly why I’m here. Definitely no other reason,” Sly said, almost slapping himself for that last part.

“Well, you aren’t very big,” said the unicorn, making Sly raise a brow out of slight offence,“but I’m sure you’ll makeup for the lack of size. I’m Shining Armour, by the way. Captain of the guards.” The unicorn raised his hoof in greeting.

“The name’s Sly. Sly Cooper,” said Sly, glad that Shining Armour hadn’t seen through his mistake. “Seeing as how you’re the captain of the guards, maybe you can help me find the... sign ups.”

“Well, you’re first problem is that you’re on the wrong floor,” stated Shining Armour. “Around the next turn, there’s a stairwell. You’re gonna want to go two floors down, and take a left. When you see a bunch of ponies lined up, that’ll be where it is. Good luck.”

“Thank you. You’ve been more helpful than you know,” said Sly.

As soon as Shining Armour was out of his sight, Sly ran towards the stairwell he had mentioned. Sure enough, it was there, and it definitely lead all the way up to the top. Sly began to run all the way to the top. He got winded after the first three floors, and began to crawl up the last two.

“They... should really... put... an elevator... in here,” said Sly when he finally made it to the top, using his cane as a crutch. He fell down and rested for a few seconds, lungs blazing from lack of oxygen intaking. It took a moment or two for Sly to get back onto his hooves and go back to the job at hand. Before him was a large door that was locked by a key. There was only one guard in there, pacing the floor and keeping watch upon it. Sly assumed that he had the key to the room that the door barred him from.

“Piece of cake,” Said Sly as he snuck up behind the guard.

Sly began to pick the guards pocket, cane delicately yanking out the contents. Inside, he found a few bits, some gum, an ID card, and finally, the key. Before he could go open the door though, the guard turned around. “Hey!” bellowed the guard, startling Sly immensely. Before the guard could do anything, Sly quickly used his cane to knock the guard unconscious, the gold cane striking the golden helm, creating a reverberating DONG!

“Okay, now that has never happened before,” Sly remarked, sweat starting to leak down his face. “Am I losing my touch? No... no, I’m still the greatest thief ever.”

Sly unlocked the vault door and went inside to find the paper Discord had been talking about laying on a table in the middle of the room. Sly picked up the paper, surprised at how easy it was from this point. As he left the room, though, the paper began to glow and an alarm began to blare.

“A magic alarm?” Sly asked. “Not cool, Celestia! So not cool!”

Sly began to run towards the stairwell, running down as fast as he could. As he got down two floors, he became surrounded by guards. Sly tried to fight them off, but they soon formed a massive dogpile on top of him. Sly saw Shining Armour walk up to him. The last thing he saw was the captain’s hoof crashing into his face.

---

Sly woke up to a startling sight. Not only were his cane and bag gone, but he also saw that he was behind bars. The cell had the typical design one would see in movies: uncomfortable cot on the side, toilet and rust-tainted sink on the other side, and barren, grim walls all around.

“So you’re finally awake, are you?” asked a familiar voice. Sly saw Twilight walk through a door on the other side of the room, her face caked with tears.

“Twilight...” Sly murmured, a feeling of shame setting in. “Listen I-”

“No, you listen!” yelled Twilight, causing Sly to go silent in shock. “I can’t believe you would do this, Sly, after all we’ve been through! I knew you were a thief, and I knew you couldn’t stand not being able to steal anything, but taking something from the princess?! That’s a serious offense, Sly, even if all you tried to steal was a cake recipe!”

“Please try t- Wait, what.” Sly was slightly baffled. A cake recipe? Are you kidding me?

Twilight ignored him and calmed down a bit, but she continued her rant. “Normally, the sentence for stealing something from the princesses is banishment, but since you’re my friend, I was able to convince her to be less harsh. You’re still going to be imprisoned for the rest of your life, but at least you won’t be alone. You deserve to be banished, but I couldn’t let that happen. You know why? Because I loved you.” Twilight turned away and began to walk towards the door. Before leaving, Twilight looked back at him and said, “And I still love you. Goodbye, Sly Cooper.” And with that, Twilight left Sly alone with his thoughts.

“She... loved me?” Sly repeated to himself. It was then that it all set in, causing Sly’s body to darken, the colour in his clothes, his eyes, even his already monochromatic fur, to dull and lose their colour lustre. Discord had set all this up. Set it up so that Sly became more that just a bad thief, but also... to be a bad friend. Depression set in like a parasite, eating at him until it’s had its nonexistent fill. Sly glacially walked over to a corner of his cell, curling up into a ball, mind ruined and heart a mess.

“No... no...”

He could almost hear Discord’s maniacal laughter.

---

Several hours later

---

“But I’m telling you Twilight, this isn’t Sly’s style,” said Bentley, trying to convince the purple mare, which he's been attempting since the train ride home. Ever since Sly’s arrest, Twilight and everyone else had gone into their own depression, a deep, dank, and dark crevice from which it’d take a miracle to bring them out of. Spike, Pinkie Pie, and Fluttershy had excluded themselves from the others. Pinkie Pie, Murray, Rarity, Applejack, and Rainbow Dash had completely immersed themselves in their jobs to distract them from the pain. Twilight just sat in the library doing absolutely nothing. The only two people who seemed unaffected were Bentley and Carmelita. Carmelita seemed to be celebrating the fact that her raccoon rival had finally got what he deserved, but Bentley had been thinking, and was convinced that something was wrong.

“Face it, Bentley, you know Sly’s a thief,” said Twilight. “This was bound to happen.” In Bentley’s opinion, Twilight did not look good. Her mane and tail were a complete mess, and her eyes were red from lack of sleep. If she kept going on like this, it would be completely detrimental to her health.

“While that is true, it still doesn’t seem like Sly,” Bentley stated. “He would never betray his friends. Plus, even if he still tried to steal something from someone, the most he does is leave behind a few unconscious guards. He would never, ever get caught, and yet, he did. It just doesn’t make any sense!”

Twilight’s head shot up at Bentley’s last sentence. “...Bentley, say that last part again.”

“This doesn’t make any sense?” Bentley repeated.

“Doesn’t make any... of course!” Twilight shouted, causing the ex-reptile to jump half a foot in the air. “It doesn’t make any sense! I only know one creature who loves causing chaos for no real reason: Discord.”

“Discord?” Bentley was curious about who or what this could be. After Twilight finished explaining Discord to Bentley, he agreed that that Discord had to be behind it.

“But how are we going to prove it?” asked Bentley.

“Well, first we have to get Sly out of the dungeon.”

“I think I have something that can help us with that,” said Bentley, handing Twilight a book. Twilight looked at the cover of the book and recognised Sly’s family emblem on the cover. Written in a bold, elegant font were the words: Thievius Raccoonus. “Go get him, tiger.”

Comments

[Alex Rite]

Ah... I love it when a good writing team comes together!

[Deyeaz]

2208473
Hell yeah, man. /)

[Xinrick]

Yay update

[Darkstar195]

It's a bit too... sudden, that Twilight knows it's Discord causing this. Otherwise, GREAT story. I've never played Sly Cooper before, but this made me want to.

[SuperPinkBrony12]

Seriously Sly was going to be banished for stealing a cake recipe? Come on it's just one little recipe. It's like if you were thrown in jail for life just for jaywalking once. Unless Discord had an influence on Celestia and the guards.

[The Fiery Joker]

Imprisoned for life for a cake recipe?

...

I think Equestria needs some Eighth Amendment.

[Mobiusman]

I have one word for this story. Chicanery

[Shadowbroker13]

I don't think Celestia would imprison someone of life or even banishment for stealing a cake recipe I mean when twilight broke into Starswirl the Bearded section of magic spells and Celestia caught her she basically pointed her in the direction to find the spell she was looking for so I would see Celestia playing with Sly and say if he wanted her famous cake recipe so much he could have just asked.

[the other sans]

he didn’t know what the spell was, but that that was exactly why he wanted it
At that momen
for Sly to get back onto his hooves. went back to the job at hand.

1. I think this extra that in this case would be redundant no?
2. Moment.
3. An unfinished sentence.

I strike again

[Snowstreak]

Sly tries to steal a cake recipe, and now Twilight is going to study the Thievius Raccoonus to save him...

waitjustaminute.

TWILIGHT IS GOING TO STUDY THE THIEVIUS RACCOONUS!!!!!

This is either going to be awesome, or the world is going to end. Nowhere in Equestria will ever be safe again!

[mrgysao]

This chapter seemed a bit rushed in my opinion but still had some interesting development.

[Creed Miles]

2209572Celestia loves cake. simple as that

[RainbowTheTankEngine]

the cake is a lie

[Uzume Tennouboshi]

2208845

Come on, in Equestria, the one constant about Discord is that he loves it when things don't make sense. With her brains, it's easy for somepony like Twilight to figure out that the god of chaos and disharmony is involved when she learns that something someone has done made absolutely no sense, even by Equestria's standards.

[Jgame]

2229684 That clip is the best one liner in My Little Pony. Ever.

[Uzume Tennouboshi]

3342759 Glad you approve.

You know, it's always bugged me how while Princess Celestia has her own emoticon, Princess Luna doesn't get one. If this isn't fixed, she might become Nightmare Moon again!