• Published 15th Sep 2013
  • 12,812 Views, 479 Comments

Pillow Case - Taffy

When a simple small town Pegasus finds herself out of work, she takes up the offer of an old friend to move to the big city. After all, it has been over ten years since portals to the human world were opened, ponies do this all the time now right?

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Smelly Log Pizza

My nose was cold. So were the tips of my hooves, but my nose was all sniffly too. It was only fall but the cold hit much harder than it does back home. It was like it seeped through the walls. Something about the weather in this world just sets my feathers on edge. It’s like it’s wild, mechanical. Icy? That’s the wrong word. Of course there’s ice in cold weather! Well, not this weather. It’s not that cold obviously. Seep was the right word though. It got into everything.

Strawberry was weird about it. The human world has all these cool things built into the walls so all you need to do is turn a little knob and the whole apartment will get warmer, but apparently that takes up too much electricity and electricity costs money and Berry insists on waiting until the end of the month before turning up the heat. She said it’s not even that cold. I’m a pegasus though! If she can take it I can take it. We’re built to take tough weather! Even if it is on crazy weird human earth. Bring it on human world! Grrr!

So there I was hiding all cozy under a blanket in bed. I was really dark suddenly. I think the sun outside set and I forgot to turn on a light. I didn’t really need one. I had my tablet glowing in front of me.

A month of delivering pizza and I finally had enough to buy one. Not that delivering pizza is that bad of a job mind you, I’m just not that good at it. Ok it was a bad job regardless. I don’t know how other ponies do it. Humans and non-winged ponies will only take the job if they have a car, and they might be more comfortable and secure in one of those, but the pay is even worse because most places don’t pay for the gas you use, and Emily said that stuff is expensive, and Berry was uptight about the electric bill so it must really be bad for her to complain about it.

That’s why everyone told me to try it, almost like it was expected, you know? Like so many people just assume it would work out and the job would be a breeze for me, but no. All those human houses look the same, especially from the air, and they gave me a little navigation computer thing that uses satellites in space to tell you where you are and where to go, which is super cool and creepy at the same time, but I was still knocking on the wrong doors.

And some of the people who answer… most humans I’ve met have been nice but some can be really creepy and scary. I was talking to the delivery driver they have and he was telling me about some of the really weird people he’s seen too. It’s like, you finally find the right house, finally knock on the front door because that’s where the street is and you don’t want to make a mistake like before and make someone angry by landing on their nice grass and knocking on the back door because human architecture can be crazy sometimes, but no this time you got the front door, and it’s probably the only door because it’s just this tiny little rectangle building that you wouldn’t have guessed was a house if it wasn’t for the chairs and the pathway out front and a car parked nearby… and this old woman opens the door.

At least you think that’s a woman, because Celestia help me, her mane was gross and crazy, and she’s got these weird wrinkles and this look to her like she can’t decide if she’s a predator looking for prey or if there’s something chasing her. You’re worried she’s part dragon or something because she actually breathes out a puff of smoke, which explains part of the smell, but not the rest of the smell that just surrounds the whole place. I know humans eat meat but I was under the impression that they didn’t like making a mess with it and tried to keep things clean but it was like something died in there. I couldn’t even say anything when she opened the door. I just stood there shaking and nearly dropped the pizza. Then I made my first mistake because when she slammed the door going back inside for money, I was too scared to stay and didn’t want to become a pizza topping for some crazy human carnivores so I flew away as fast as I could.

Anyway that was my first strike and one of the reasons why I don’t deliver pizza anymore. That weird place that smelled like dead things. No, wait, not dead things actually, just the kinds of super gross alive things that live in dead things. It was more like that whole building was just a giant rotting log you found in the woods playing with your friends and there’s all kinds of creepy things living in there. It didn’t look like it was rotting or anything from the outside, but we weren’t really paying attention. I had told strawberry that I was getting really good at flying and she wanted to see, so I looked for something too big for a little filly to jump over. I found a stick and flapped my wings really hard while running and then flew over it! Except it wasn’t really flying, it was just jumping with my wings out. Strawberry said she could jump higher and then proved it by jumping over a huge log. Then Poppy Seed jumped too and started laughing. I couldn’t lose at flying to two earth pony fillies! So I ran as fast as I could and leapt in the air! That was the first time I really did do any flying, though it was a little. I could feel the lift from my wings that Mom always said to look for when she game me flying lessons, but I was too surprised by the feeling that I stopped flapping and fell face first into the log. It broke open like a wall made of smelly, moldy bread and I screamed when bugs started crawling in my mane. There was probably a snake too.

I cried all the way back home while Strawberry and Poppy tried to calm me down. Once I had a bath and mom had cleaned out all my scrapes and helped me comb my feathers straight again I had settled down some, but I remember being too scared to go back out into the woods for almost a year. I even had flashbacks during my flying lessons sometimes and was too scared for even those. My brothers teased me about it sometimes. Strawberry never did. She and Poppy both asked permission to stay the night to cheer me up. It was my first slumber party at my house. We played all sorts of games and had so much fun. There were more fun nights but that was the one I remember the most.

I didn’t go back to work after that delivery. I think Berry called them and gave some excuse so they wouldn’t fire me quite yet. I just went straight to her place, took a shower, combed my wings, and cried into my pillow.

Author's Note:

Quick little chapter about a pony's first job on earth.

Mostly it's an excuse to show this awesome vector from the PiE thread that I just love:

It's naked Strawberry! Oh gosh!

Put some clothes on girl!

That's better.

(I will cite the artist when I can remember their name, and I'm eternally embarrassed for forgetting at this crucial moment. This one right here. Happening right now. Oooh... :fluttershyouch: )

Like previous shorts this one is out of order and I'll reorder the chapters later to fit the timeline after people have had a chance to read this one.