Fluttershy has a new computer! Rainbow Dash wants to pull a prank and decides to break her in to the cruelties of the Equestri-net in her own way.
[My first one-shot. Minor shipping elements- as a gag]
[Enjoy! I just HAD to write this.]

[No editing or proof-reading done, but did my best]

[Well damn? I got semi famous.]

If you came to hear a story, I’m sorry to disappoint. I suspect this’ll just end up as one big confession, really. When you’re the first Teutscher to set hoof into Equestria, I suppose that’s to be expected. And when you’re the universe’s favorite chew toy, doubly so. Still, with enough wit, some Prussian ingenuity, a droll sense of humor, and wanton murder, I might just survive this. Then again, when you’re going up against an unending list of things like government conspiracies, that guardian angel who keeps telling you to kill ponies, psycho Equestrian girls with allophilia, a lunatic princess, the legions of the Inferno, the Equestrian culture itself, swashbuckling sword fights, and laissez-faire economists, you begin to realize why there’s a big “if” in the middle of your life.

Your thoughts/critiques/deathreats are welcome in the comments. Spoilers are also encouraged. If you don’t have anything to complain about, do please tell me what you liked so I know what worked.

Now on TV Tropes. Posted on the Equestria Daily 5/28/13. Now in ePub format for your convenience.

Twilight Sparkle just can't find enough time in the day. She has to study friendship for the Princess, hang out with her five friends, and juggle her own hobbies and interests besides. But when a novel solution presents itself in the form of an experimental new spell, will it solve her time crunch, or will she be distracted even further?