cks you designed to be ~exotic~ or whatever, and those rabid jerks at Disney can only grit their teeth now!
Story Idea: Fallout: Equestria — Forlorn Zeitgeist slash Story recommendation: Fallout: Equestria — Pink Eyes · 7:40am Mar 12th, 2015
Now, no need to panic, just a basic idea here I'd like feedback on. I'm well aware I've got quite a few longer stories unfinished right now.
Anyway, I'm a long-term Fallout fan, even have the originals still on CD believe it or not... but I've just recently gotten into the Equestria version.
The original is just such a doorstop, that I never seemed to have time. That, and since it has gotten such massive praise, it seemed wise to save it for a rainy day.
I have not actually been reading that story.
I'm currently reading about this plucky little lady:
Puppysmiles, from Fallout: Equestria — Pink Eyes.
A bit thick, but hey, she's mentally four, and still one of the most adorable little bad-flanks I've read about in quite a while.
I don't want to spoil anything more than that, but if you've liked what I've done with undead in Ironic, I think you'll LOVE what Pink Eyes does with ghouls.
A few more pics as spoiler prevention, slash enticement before I get into the spoilery spoilers of spoilage, 'kay?
Convinced you don't want to know more yet?
Good.
Now, I'm personally only half done with Pink Eyes, but there was a concept brought up so fascinating, I jumped over to the wiki just to see what else has been done with it.
And I was quite shocked when such a cool concept as Ghosts (warning, spoilers) have only seemingly gotten a token mention outside Pink Eyes.
For anybody still not convinced, here's the —heh, geist about ghosts.
A rare foal only variant of Canterlot ghoul slash type of abomination depending a bit on the severity of the Pink Cloud contamination that killed them. The suits kept them (barely) alive enough, to reach the fusing stage of pink cloud exposure; in turn making them one with their suits and (necromantic) life-support talisman.
Their basically a haunted environmental suit filled with semi-liquid Pink Cloud infused flesh-slime, a few bone fragments and mainly kept together by that suit being 'Twilight Sparkle without a budget' levels over-engineered, including self-repair spells up the wazoo.
Near needless to say, despite being tougher than nails, not many of them survived for long given the whole minds of foals thing.
...
Naturally, since I'm a mad sadist towards my characters most of the time and I love the genera, I'm thinking HiE.
(
)
Twenty-thirty-ish loser of the 'child genius that never went anywhere due to sky-high expectations' variety, plucked from Earth and turned to a colt by Discord as a prank, to be precise.
Arc one being rather standard cutesy HiE stuff with a pre-war Fallout: Equestria twist, AKA mainly me making every reader that knows what's coming cringing clear out of their skins on a paragraph by paragraph basis.
(Again, )
That arc ending with the presence of Zeitgeist's (bad-a-boom, tish!) causing a 'for want of a nail' scenario with The Elements and princesses, altering how history should go as Discord's little cat's paw of change, but being unable to escape Canterlot himself.
Arc #2 to whatever being the smallest abomination in Equestria's journeys, as he tries to fix things, cure himself, get home and/or survive.
Thoughts on that premise?
Not exactly the most booming of sub-generas, the 'foal-shaped-human-in-Equestria' one, but I think 'with Equstria as a freshly razed dystopia' is a decently fresh twist in that context.
And second question, these stats look good?
Forlorn Zeitgeist’s S.P.E.C.I.A.L
Concept: The creepy genius child foal that nobody nopony listens to.
Traits: Gifted, Jinxed.
(42 total.)
Strength: 6
Perception: 8
Endurance: 8
Charisma: 2
Intelligence: 10
Agility: 7
Luck: 1
A bit 'min-max'-y for a foal, but I think they make sense for both a insufferable prodigy, and later a rather creepy abomination.
Again, I'm rather fresh to the Fallout: Equestria scene so I don't know what the consensus in about ghouls, but in Fallout: Tactics at least 'monster' PC characters have different min and max stats, so I think it fits.
Not going to lie, I'm slightly worried about that '10' since that's supposed to be 'super genius' according to the in-game lore... but I haven't gotten any complaints about my character's appearing dumber than they're meant to be yet, and you learn the best when you push yourself, right?
That 1 and jinxed, though? Heh, heh, heh...
Still... any thoughts or feedback? I'll probably cross-post this later in the F: E group sans the recommendation bit, but I want to hear from you guys first.
I'd give it a read if you wrote it. I'm actually about to get into Fallout Equestria, and would read Pink Eyes afterwards. I'm actually at quite a loss to explain why it's such a huge community. I mean, I thought Five Score was large, but FE is huge!
And it's all OC territory too.
About the stats, jinxed with low luck in Fallout 1 and 2 is one of those hilarious but short play-throughs where you die really early in the game. Now, high luck and jinxed is where the fun combination is at, in my opinion.
Hey, who don't had 10 agility and 9 int in Fallouts? At least on the second walkthrough.
Otherwise it's like playing ultradumb character in PS:T. (Ultradumb in F2 at least was sometimes lulzy, though. Dialogues with Torr are priceless.)
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Thank you for the vote of confidence.
I'm rather fresh to it myself, but I think it's a mix of two things:
1,) Fallout being a popular franchise where OCs are both rather standard and encouraged, thanks to the thing were the only thing set in stone canon-wise being 'Grand Title X was the savior we needed;' the way about 90% of people play anyway.
2,) Any Mary Sue sticks out like a broken thumb stapled onto a knee thanks to the semi-dystopian setting, so more inexperienced writers go mainly elsewhere.
Comparing with... well, Five Score for example used to get a metric fuck-ton of bad stories before that rule change raised the bar, since turning into the actual character was like a fly-trap filled with honey and vinegar as far as self-insert wish-fulfillment went.
A small thing, but I think that type of goodwill leads to something of a long-term positive feedback-loop. Kinda cute if you think about it, actually.
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Might be my mind playing tricks on me, but I think I actually did that once in Fallout 2. A full 'jinxed, luck 1' run that is. Think I got fairly far for such a gimmick, at least.
Dear Lord, I don't even want to remember how many guns I lost. I had to buy handguns in bulk for a bit, just to be able to fight!
Oh, yes.
Closest darn thing to game sponsored cheating, yeah, but really, really fun.
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Heh, guilty as charged.
Personally I prefer Int and Luck pushed to 10, though, with the rest being secondary.
What can I say? Being able to kill things like Deathclaws by throwing rocks, and lucking out so 'bad' that their mind goes squish?
Never, ever gets old!
You know, I've probably played PS: T through a dozen times...
And I just can't make myself play any other character than a high wiz, high Int lawful good wizard.
That arc of going from a nobody that can't even remember the day of the week, to towering pillar of such Will that the planes start and stop at his command, and yet uses that literally reality shattering power to bring as much good and righteousness to the places he travels as he may?
It's just so mentally satisfying, i just can't make myself play any other way.
I've read an Let's Play that covered the evil path as bonus updates, though.
Holy freaking crap, you can be vile in that game. No goatee twirling there, it's genuinely vile and evil stuff.
Skipped the spoilers. I also keep trying to read puppysmiles but the little skamp annoys the hell out of me.
Puppysmiles1 Best vault hunter ever!
I absolutely adored that story when I read it(all in one go, thanksgiving week) And recommend it anyone I can find that hasn't already read it and likes FoE.
Sounds interesting.
If you wrote it, I'd give it a squizz.
I would probably give it a go, the pre-war arc would definitely catch my interest.
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I must admit that I think the story (so far, at least) did a good work on Puppysmiles. She genuinely feels like... well, a four year old, but one that's rather sweet and trying her best.
We have a saying/old joke here in Sweden though. "IQ = Seagull" and that sadly fits Puppy rather well sometimes.
To be fair though, her Int is 'just' a four, so slightly below average is actually straight on target.
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She is adorable, isn't she?
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Thanks!
...That's really so unexplored? Seemed nearly self-evident for me as a good way to —pardon the pun, flesh out a ghoul or otherwise mutated character that's old enough.
I at least would read it.
Notably, this is because there are very few Human in Fallout Equestria Stories. Two I recall are garbage, and I think there was one that is discontinued, and there might be another.
A number of authors do short crossover scenes but they are really short and have no effect on anything. Actually, same with Dresden files in that story. Dark Wanderings I think. Can't recall author.
As I was saying, Rare stories get higher ratings from me, due to scarcity. There are no real Human in Fallout Equestria Stories.
Also, Puppysmiles, Although I never actually read her stats, I am pretty sure were pretty much inverted. Massive luck (or perhaps merely seems that way due to invulnerability) and not so much intellegence. XD
th06.deviantart.net/fs70/PRE/i/2015/012/1/9/haunted_steel__traink__by_apple_tank-d8dq27f.png
Several months ago, I was idly wondering with all the haunted house stories going around, why hasn't anyone done a Haunted Tank?
Suggesting a soul binding alchemy circle in a forum drawn inside a tank was received with a bunch of Boos.
Ah Pink Eyes, one of those rare occasions when the side story is better than the original. If you're looking to write a Fo:E story I really recommend going through Pink Eyes with a fine toothed comb, though obviously you'll want to read the original, if nothing else but to get the setting firmly fixed down.
So, back of the envelope analysis of HiW (Human in the Wasteland). As has been said there haven't been any good ones so far that I know of, but I don't know why there couldn't be. Ultimately, Fo:E I find is characterised by a loss of innocence, a morbid sense of discovery and a fight to restore what has been lost, and a HiW can be massaged into that kind of shape. A human is as innocent as any
vaultstable dweller when it comes to the wasteland, and there entire world being alien makes the discovery element that much more powerful. I can't really see the restoration thing come across brilliantly, as it's pretty hard to fight for an alien land, but it might work depending on how you pitch your character.Speaking off which, and being a little overly pessimistic, I'm less sold on your character. Arrogent HiEs are tricky in my eyes, having a PoV that's full of itself makes the whole Sue issue that much more dangerous (and even if you subvert it later you still lose readers in the now)... but then again this isn't really a Sue setting, so it might fly. The biggest problem with him that I see him as a kind of an anti-Pink Eyes, sharp, but unlucky and without the adorable. Puppy Smiles' character works because she is utterly innocent and stripping that out changes the tone of what you're doing massively. Having a proactive, intelligent, and empowered character early could make this easily stray into the wish fulfilment territories, and those never read well. That's just an issue in potential, but I'd still advise really pinning down the main characters' vice/virtue (as defined by Fo:E) before getting stuck in. A good character is absolutely key for these stories. If you're playing with the usual moral ambiguity of the Fo:E setting you need the lead to be sympathetic enough to carry people through the times when things can't end without blood being spilled.
Anyway, late night rambling over, before I wind up oversleeping. It would be awesome to see a Fo:E story from you, your stories always have an interesting take, and Fo:E is in dire need of those
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I know of one that might fit that bill for you, but I haven't read it yet.
Fallout Equestria: Equestrian Wanderings by ed2481
I have read the stories it's a spin-off from though, and Ethan (OC, The Lone Wanderer) is one of those love or hate it characters. Personally I think his type of crazy fits quite well with Fallout, but he's really, really overpowered (if game 'legal').
It made sense in context, but once for example in Dark Wanderings he killed a super-mutant by giving it the finger, mostly to mess with Twilight.
Personally I read that series as primarily a comedy with some good action and darker dramatic moments, but I know it's not for everybody.
This is really early, so I'm mostly kicking around ideas right now.
Still, I've got a few vague plans on actually turning exactly that into a character arc; starting as somebody rather neutral mainly doing 'quid pro quo' stuff for survival, morphing over time into a 'savior of the wastes' type as he sees both the good and ill the desparate ponies may do.
A bit trite and tested, I'll admit, but...
I guess I should have given a more detailed description and 'insufferable' was probably too strong a word.
I was more thinking an (generally) well-meaning but clueless 'ivory tower intellectual' type forced to go out into the real world. One of those types that can talk about the oddest topics for hours, but don't quite get stuff like small talk and handshakes.
(Overcoming that —or at least getting better, also being something of an arc for him.)
I have however actually written a HiE with pride as the vice (and an black and red alicorn nonetheless!
) that's been rather nicely received so far, if you've missed it.
Might be just an one-off thing, but the 'trick' seems to be making sure they aren't constantly arrogant, but instead have certain things they're arrogant about. (In Death Darkness' case, her skills in magic and thievery, plus her looks.)
That, and far more importantly, having characters call them out and be annoyed in-story.
A lot of people miss that step since it's 'that character's thing' but it not only gives added verisimilitude, but also gives any reader that totally agrees a vent for their irritation.
I do think it helps but isn't required if some of that arrogance is clearly utterly unfounded and played for laughts, as well.
Those looks I talked about, that DD/'Ruddy Dawn' happens to be so proud of?
Link, to spare the innecent the horror.
Yeah...
Absolutely agreed. Part of why I posted the idea so early was to get some feedback on the base concept, since I know so little (yet) about Fallout: Equestria.
And this is right about the virtues, right?
fc05.deviantart.net/fs70/f/2013/115/3/7/virtues_of_the_wasteland_wallpaper_by_brisineo-d62yrzt.png
Couldn't find anything on the vices, though... but I'll admit I didn't look that long to avoid spoilers.
Call me crazy, but I'd like to get through at least Pink Eyes and the original before I have a 'Rosebud' moment from a in-dept wiki crawl.
Thanks.
Yeah, I have to admit; even with how little I've read I've noticed quite a few 'badass cowboys/girls wandering about' stories, and similar.
Which leads me to...
Yeah, I'll freely own up to that.
I'm really enjoying what an innocent and mostly carefree character Puppysmiles is, but that she barely notices her condition is grating a bit on me. A curious scientist ending up with the same condition sounded like a good excuse to explore both Ghosts, and other points about the Wasteland.
Still, I'm not quite done with Pink Eyes yet, so might be something yet to come from my perspective. I do fully agree that zeitgeist needs —heh, fleshing out, though; I was mainly wanting to hear if 'Gifted' is considered instant down-vote bait in the F: E community, or something.
Think Gifted makes sense for the type of character I want to write, but removing that trait and reshuffling the stats wouldn't be a deal-breaker for me.
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Thanks!
http://www.fimfiction.net/story/76764/fallout-equestria-equestrian-wanderings, you mean?
Yeah, think it's the only Fallout: Equestria story with humans in it I've stumbled across that... well, even seems good, to be blunt.
As I mentioned to billymorph Ethan is a bit love/hate, but he's usually really funny. Haven't read that particular side-story myself, yet, though.
Yeah, more or less the whole base charachter concept, right there. I'm a sucker for intelligent undead, so I'm slightly exasperated with how little thinking Puppysmiles tends to do.
I will freely admit she's cuter than a freaking button, though.
2872930 Heh, yea.
That is not actually the story I was thinking of, specifically, but it is by the same author.
That is one of the few Human in Fallout Equestria story which is any good. Forgot about that story.
I was talking about a different one which had a few omakes of such. Actually had a Dresden Omake and one with Littlepip. Specifically when, I think, Luna was reality jumping trying to find Twilight.
Also, there is this one
Rules of Engagement
Which I think is pretty good, if probably discontinued.
Ponies in Fallout Vanilla is pretty common however, irritatingly enough.
~
You did say that that was the base character concept. Also, I think she got a Perk that made it so that her bad luck could sometimes get so bad that it would spillover onto others. I seem to recall her setting off a security system which killed an entire group, technically including her.
On Intelligence, I loved how she argues with her Suit's Basic AI, befriends "Pink Voice" and manages to un-corrupt Solaris by pure stubbornness.
She was easily manipulated, and I loved how the Griffin (can't recall name) noted that Puppysmiles "couldn't be a robot, because robots are intelligent."
Oh , and you can't ever forget the ROCK OF DESTINY!
Which I imagine is related to TOM.
~
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Ah, I get you. I was worried we were going to see a ponified Sheldon Cooper, which, while an awesome idea, would wear pretty damn quickly.
Yeah, I liked DD, she had a good atitude and some good foils to drag her down to human levels on occasion. It didn't hurt that her antagonists were all on her level too, so there wasn't that nasty power imbalance.
Ah, I was looking for that! Though actually I was more thinking about the Element virtues, Honesty, Loyalty, Kindness, Generosity, Laugher and The Spark. One of the themes of Fo:E is that you pick one of these and try and live up to it. For example, Pip spends much of her time wresting with the idea that she's Kindness, but corrupted somehow. On the surface, she does good and selfless deeds on behalf of others for little reward and at great personal risk, but it's easy fo her motivations to become twisted around to the point where she's can justify mass murder in the name of Kindness. There's the bit in the show where Discord twists Fluttershy making her cruel, but that's not the corrupted version of Kindness as I see it, that's the inversion. Corrupt kindness is when you do horrific deeds in the name of helping others and go home smiling about it afterwards.
Following that logic, Puppy's Element would be Laughter because ultimately her strength is her optimism and refusual to accept the world as a terible place. Don't read this next bit if you haven't finished yet, but ultimately this does destroy her in the end, and Puppy's corruption occurs because her fantasy world fell apart and she went to insane lengths to try and revive her delusion. For your character, I'm thinking generosity might be a good fit. He gives gifts to help others to try and help, but it is very easy to give gifts that just make others weaker, or more dependant.
It's not the stats that are my problem, it's the fact that a negative of character doesn't really stand on it's own feet. The devil is, of course, in how you flesh out your concept, and I'm sure you'll have no problem with that.
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My mom loves that show, but I simply can't stand it, so I doubt I'll ever write that type of character.
The rest of the cast is really good, but having to suffer Sheldon's presence just kills the fun of the show for me.
And this from somebody that genuinely liked Scrappy-Doo even as a kid. I'm not quite sure why, but Sheldon just push so many rage buttons for me that I just see red.
Really great actor even if I can't remember his name, though, I'll grant the dude that. Damning with faint praise, I know, but Sheldon wouldn't be even half as insurable in the hands of a lesser actor.
O~oh, I like that idea.
Initially I thought of having him being honest to a fault, but so blunt that it basically becomes a bug-zapper for morale due to his poor skills with people.
...Come to think about it, that's rather Sheldon; just minus the casual, intentional verbal cruelty.
Believe it or not, but I'm actually mentally flirting with the idea of making an account over at InvisibleCastle so I can prove it, dig up the formulas for Fallout 2 or make some sort of spread-sheet and just... heh, roll with it.
Not every story you write The Nameless One Junior, so might as well go the whole hog on critical failures, right?
That Char 2 is going to be trickier, I'll grant that... but I think I can pull it off; mainly by making it clear Zeitgeist is really, really trying in his own way, diplomacy just isn't even near his field of expertise. Hopefully that should make the readers still feel sympathy for him, but still go 'Oh God, he's trying to talk things over!
' when that happens.
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If you are still considering doing this idea I say go for it. I read Pink Eyes recently and I fully agree with your comment of the main character not seriously considering her condition and all the implications of it.
It's an entire method of existence that is unique (Consider Johann Kraus from Hellboy and how completely different that character is from Puppysmiles) with a ton of potential and yet they are rendered extinct in the same story they appear in. The reasoning given is understandable: There are only a certain number of them, the feral ones were dangerous enough to hunt them all down, they were all foals, and only their willpower kept them alive and that faded once they realized their parents were gone. You'd have to bring in a HiE or an age regressed pony to do anything big with it and be believable.
The way you want to go about it kinda reminds me of the Displaced stories. There would be a significant 'backstory' to cover that it'd take a non-trivial amount of time to get into the meat of the story. Unless, you think you can do it in the same timeframe that Consequences of Unoriginality got it's backstory out of the way before beginning the meat of the story (in 10k words for the prologue, and it still had a ton of references to what the prologue didn't cover). Otherwise like most Displaced stories, I imagine you'd begin in Post Apocalyptia and do flashbacks to cover what came before.
It's not quite clear to me, I think it sounds like you intend to do it within the month of the Canterlot Foal Ghosts in the immediate aftermath before they all disappeared and not in Fallout Equestria's timeline (200 years later) proper. Then again the For Want Of A Nail aspect might make Fallout Equestria obsolete, which is kinda sad considering that it means all the characters of Fallout Equestria won't exist. Then again, all your Five Score stories only take the base concept and completely ignore the canon story so it would be expected from a story from you. And the fates of the characters from MLP is pretty damn tragic canonically.
Dammit, you are getting me hyped up on the idea of the story and you have so many other stories still in the works.
I can't help but imagine a kind of reverse HiE discrimination comment from the main character when he points out that while there are many bad things about humans that others constantly point out, at least they didn't destroy their world once they got into MAD status. Or maybe they did, and that is how he came to Equestria in the first place (not that he recalls that) and brought the 'disease' of the war of annihilation with him I know that was the gimmick of Gears In The Void and it was a pretty unique concept to explain why the HiE thing happened, and the humans in general being a victim, one in a long line of victims that the ponies happen to be the latest ones of.
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Think I mentioned it, but I got the 'why' with her mental age, but Just seemed like wasted potential to have Puppysmiles wrestle so little with what happened to her.
Granted, we are talking about Puppysmiles...
'Oh my Gosh, I'm a supermare! Wheeeeeeeeee!"
Feels a bit weird to act as devil's advocate against my own idea, but technically I could actually see the concept work with some random Canterlot foal. Those suits were handed out almost by the truck load, after all.
Either go for somepony either really mature for their age, or a 'having to grow up really quick' type story.
Still, either of those alternatives would be dark. Even for the universe.
Guess you've got a real winner on your hands when somebody is torn across the universe and ending up an undead foal powered by necromancy, arcane bio-weapons and their own willpower is the lighter, fluffier alternative, but there you go.
I intentionally try to avoid that writing style. Too many flashbacks can be really darn confusing, and there's always the temptation of jabbing things into that backstory that might be rather overpowered.
Heck, even 'this one time I met a ghoul and we became friends' could become rather silly with 200 years, if it turns out that ghoul's been hard at work turning him/herself a genuine bad-ass.
The odd indulgence is fine, but if —as quite a few Displaced stories end up doing, you're writing half the darn story 'a long, long time ago' why not turn that into the actual present? That way, you actually have some tension on what's going to happen as well.
Speaking of...
Eh, kinda the bug-bear with alternate history. A bit disturbing, but if nothing else that adds the element that the 'future' is still unwritten.
So things could turn out better, or infinitely worse!
Still, current idea for a time line is:
Arrival, about 6-8 months before the spells fell. Giving Zeitgeist time to get to know the world and its people. And... well, relearn how to walk and stuff like that, since it would be a rather short story otherwise. Arc one, if you will.
The bomb, Canterlot, and pun unintended, fallout from Zeitgeist's presence, both good and bad. This serving as the primary 'nail.'
After that it's both really sketchy right now and heavy spoiler territory, I'm afraid. I'm thinking of quite a few time-skips with periods of calm in Z's 'life,' though.
Not sure if I'll go all the way up to the official 'time of heroes,' but that's the idea at least.
Seriously though, large part why this is just an idea I wanted initial feedback on; I don't want to be known as one of those writers that never finishes anything, and there's just a few too many things tagged 'incomplete' under my stories right now.
I want to finish at least one, two before even starting up a new one, both for myself and the readers' sake.
You know, I'm actually planning that to be a huge part of Zeitgeist's character. Just not in quite so an pessimistic manner.
By the standards of actual ABC weaponry, F: E is rather lighthearted after all.
And yeah, sometimes perspective's a bitch.
Still, I think it could be a rather intriguing and unique perspective on a post-apocalypse to have a character that quite literally knows things could be worse and finds it sad, but still ultimately uplifting that things turned out as relatively well as they did.
Going to be a fine line between coming off as genuine but informed optimism, and not having it seem like rose-tinted denial.
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You know, looking over your proposed stats again, I think you might have Strength (6), Endurance (8), and Agility (7) tagged too high. Perception and Intelligence I can buy being his backstory, but don't forget that he is a foal, and wouldn't be expected to be as strong, endurable, or quick as an adult. At least, food for thought.
Does It matter if he is an Earth Pony, Unicorn, or (HAHA) Pegasus? I guess you might be able to explain his strength and endurance as an Earth Pony. I don't even know if the other two will even function as a ghost... Not that they'd be much use anyway as a foal.
But it would be funny otherwise.
Side note: Gifted means that the lowest a stat could go is 2, so no Luck at 1 with Gifted trait.
Well you can always actually go Puppysmiles' route and just go into stasis.
It's just, immediate aftermath stories tend to forget that it's an insanely bleak period of time, the first 20 years afterwards, as a good portion of those that survived die from radiation poisoning and the loss of clean food/water (though in Equestria I guess the latter part isn't as big a deal as in traditional fallout) or are mutated.
You'd have to try hard to not have that be depressing as shit. Then again, Fallout Equestria isn't as bad as traditional Fallout: A lot more ponies survive, and he could begin several friendships with those that will eventually become ghouls and live as long as he does.
It's Fallout Equestria. Why bother with a fine line when you have an exploitable personality flaw just waiting to be used? Or be like Moria and be a little too optimistic; Brought about by life where you were difficult to kill without really acknowledging that you can be killed if you are unlucky or your opponent determined enough.
Mmm, unlucky... you said his luck would be terrible right? I'm imagining a situation where he has to improve on his phylactery because it becomes quite apparently that with his luck it won't last long otherwise. The idea of compensating for his bad luck is actually kinda amusing as a real premise once he recognizes the fact that he is actually jinxed and not just merely unlucky. After all, in a world of destiny being jinxed means a lot more than merely being called a jinx in the human world. Cutie Mark potential~
Now that I'm thinking about it, he could be like the Pariah of Fallout Equestria. Giving bad luck and jinxed to any party he joins (and could explain why his charisma is also so low) until he leaves or dies, and being very hard to kill.
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I think that he's outright intended to end up a literal abomination makes the stats make a bit more more sense.
I do fully intend to keep the whole 'body of a five-six year old' in mind, though. At least to begin with, Zeitgeist is going to be... well, that strong, durable and agile for a foal. Things like height, weight and size is going to be things he's stuck with for a long, long time though.
With that, the abomination stuff, and the social hurdle of looking like a kid, I think things will even out enough to be interesting.
Think I'm actually going to call author fiat on that one, but thanks for reminding me.
Could always be a tiny bonus for those that remember the first two games, slash a hint that Zeitgeist's luck is in fact so bad, it even breaks the SPACIAL system.
Have to admit, I think the story is going to feature at least one or two periods of stasis since it's apparently a ghost thing on suffering massive damage.
Still, I think I've got a rather interesting idea that I'm fairly certain no other person have tried, given how controversial it was in the games.
Mayor Zeitgeist, founder of Little Lamplight.
Think about it.
...I just had a gloriously terrible idea.
Forlorn Zeitgeist, prince-ling of misfortune!
I mean, Pink Cloud did kill Luna in cannon, so we know it works on alicorns!
...Still, I think I'll stick with the original idea (unicorn), but it would allow me to play politics quite a bit. I mean, a male alicorn, the first ever, just appering during one of the nastiest wars in Equestria's history?
Yeah...
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You mean S.P.E.C.I.A.L.? Or is this another hint of things to come?
You scary, scary person you. I love that idea.
It could also explain where all the foals went after the first month of the Canterlot Pink Gas attack. Assuming you want to save other ghosts. It could work just as well for non-abomination foals too (I don't think we've seen a ghoul foal, have we?), and you even get a Big Town reference you can use later. Of course, you'd need to ponify the names a bit, or come up with a completely different horse pun.
Just imagine the kind of superstition and paranoia that might inspire:
Your mission if you choose to accept it is to remove Forlorn Zeitgeist's soul from this world, else it can never recover. No matter the costs, the ends justify the means!
It's a self fulfilling prophesy. Especially if the initial attacks were also inspired by the Zebras predicting Zeitgeist would herald the end of their empire (+appears with
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Just to confirm, you intend to keep the idea that the ghosts are entirely modified pink gas, gaseous in nature and not solid save for the suit? It's like a walking balloon, except the suit is I imagine pretty rigid (+ very solid helmet) giving the illusion of a solid body. No skeletal liches here.
How Z intends to "recover" from that I can't imagine.
Please, please, please go in depth with studying and testing what it means to be a Canterlot Ghost. I love experimentation and observation in good stories.
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Yeah, just didn't feel for reaching for the punctuation shaker and though SPECIAL was clear enough. Sorry about the confusion.
Thanks.
Think I've got another idea that sadly conflicts with the founder thing, but I think I'm going to do it anyway; it will simply not be Zeitgeist's doing.
Heh...
Yeah, I do believe another alicorn —let alone of that, would send quite a few political splashes even the aftermath of the war wouldn't be able to quite wash away.
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Think I'm going with Puppy style Ghost being to 'normal' Ghosts what Glowing Ones are to (Fallout) ghouls.
...Although Marked Men compared with normal Ghouls might be a better comparison given how though Ghosts are and how they only come from one place, but I digress.
Basically, they start as 'just' really nasty Canterlot Ghouls, but if they get saturated with enough Pink Cloud and 'survive,' they get an 'upgrade.'
Magic.
Seriously though, how far that bit goes depends on...
I fully intend that.
Still, that does mean I need to have a far better grasp on things like Pink Cloud and Ghouls in general; so sadly another reason this is going on the back-burner for now.
I am really, really pleased with the initial reaction to only the idea, though! I was half expecting hissing and cursing at even the base concept of HiE + Ghosts.
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Thing is, there are Canterlot Ghouls. Steel Hooves from Fallout Equestria was one, and was immune to the Pink Cloud. Non Canterlot Ghouls are not immune to the Pink Cloud and can die from it. Also I'm pretty sure all ghouls are in fact alive and not undead.
The Ghosts (which were foals because the suits were given out to foals only I think?) are in fact not alive. They don't need to eat, drink sleep, or even go to the bathroom. Frankly even giving Z a robot body wouldn't make much of a difference from that state. They only 'survived' due to the suit's magic + fusion + Balefire corruption of the suit, while the Canterlot Ghouls were mutations.
That said, I'm assuming Z is going to be exactly like Puppysmiles in the planned state?
If Z manages it, he might as well give Celestia a new body while he is at it, or Twilight for that matter after separating her from GODDESS. That's how difficult that is. And not 'just' upgrading to a robot body because that's not an upgrade from Ghost state, really.
To be fair, consider your audience here and the type of stories you are known for. If you want a more honest opinion, post it to the Fallout Equestria group. Just know that I'd read it, and you are actually more likely to get flak for plans to derail canon than for a HiE.
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I'm not quite done yet with Pink Eyes, but I heard about Captain Side-kick while browsing for those images. Perhaps I missed something between the lines, but he sounded as far closer to a traditional ghoul to me.
Still, I'll have to look into it... and actually get my thumb out and finish Pink Eyes.
Bingo.
Still, even a Sisyphean task can be a good character motivation.
I'll freely admit that Z's succeeding on a cure like that is probably one of those things that will only happen in an epilogue if at all, though.
Yeah, I've noticed a trend of 'The Cannon Is Not To Be Touched By Hands of Mortals' trend over at the F: E group.
So a big, big reason I'm not posting over there until I've hammer out the concept quite a bit. Perhaps it's just me, but I'd rather be flamed for people just not liking the concept but being able to defend the 'why's' and 'how's'.
... Quite honestly I'd like another Dresden crossover. But that's just me. I LOVE Dresden Files. I'd put that stuff on my cereal if it was possible. But it does sound like an interesting concept.
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I've actually got vague plans for a sequel to Dark Horse... but that's going to be a later project; at least until after I've had time to mull over any criticism after that story is all said and done.
Still, glad to hear you found the above idea interesting.