The Stallion in the Library

by leonidas701

A Stranger Comes to Town

*Knock Knock Knock*

"Hey Twilight, open up."

"mmmh... five more minutes Princess, then I'll go to sleep..."

*BANG BANG BANG*

"Seriously Twi, wake up. I really need your help."

*Yawnnnn* "Okay, okay, I'm up Spike, what do you need help with? Did a bookshelf fall down on you again?"

Twilight opened her eyes.

Uhhggg. Why are my legs so stiff? she thought. She took a look at where she was sitting. I really need to stop falling asleep at my desk. Maybe I should try reading in bed. Twilight raised a hoof up to her forehead and rubbed the bump on it, scowling at the reminder of why she doesn’t do that. Stupid levitation spell. I wonder what Spike needs now? I swear if he’s gotten his tail stuck under another fallen bookshelf I will- Wait, if he’s banging on my door then he can’t be trapped. Twilight started to get excited at the thought of something, anything, happening to break up the monotony that the past couple of weeks had been.

Twilight lept out of her chair.

Twilight tried to run to the door.

Twilight fell flat on her face.

Oh right, now I remember why Celestia makes me have a bed.

After she had picked herself up off the ground and opened up her bedroom door, her assistant, a young dragon named Spike, grabbed her by the hoof and started pulling her down the stairs, hurriedly explaining what was happening while he did so.

"There's this pony downstairs who just barged in 10 minutes ago, pulled several books out of the shelves, and just threw them down on the nearest table and started reading them," Spike said, "He won't leave and so I need you to tell him off."

"What?!" exclaimed Twilight, "How dare he." She had spent the better part of a week getting all the shelves straightened up and organized properly! She galloped down the rest of the way and when she got to the ground floor, she saw that the tiny table she had in the main room had a pony sitting at it. It was an earth pony stallion, with a red mane, that had blue tips. His coat was as orange as the flames in her fireplace, at least as far as she could tell. Her view was hampered somewhat by his large, brown, jacket.

"Excuse me," said Twilight as she walked over to her table, "Who are you?"

"Isn't it polite to give your name before inquiring about others?" said the stallion.

"Fair enough, my name is Twilight Sparkle. Now then, what are you doing here?"

"I'm reading."

"Why are you reading here, this is my house?" Twilight asked.

"I thought that this was a public library, and the door was unlocked.”

That door has a lock?, thought Twilight.

"If I somehow got the directions wrong, then can you please point me in the direction of the real library." the stallion finally moved his eyes up from his book and looked at Twilight with a bored, yet polite, half-smile.

"No, no," Twilight said hurriedly, " You're in the right place, it's just that you’re the first pony to come here since I was sent here, and I guess that I had... Well..."

"You had what?"

"I forgot that this place was a public library, I guess I just started to think of it as home after a while," she said sheepishly.

"Really?" the stallion asked.

"Well, this place was only recently re-opened, and I guess most of the townsfolk still think of it as just an empty space."

"Huh. Must be lonely.”

"Well no, there's also Sp- Spike?" Twilight looked around the room, noticing that her dragon was nowhere to be found.

"Spspike?" the stallion asked, “What kind of a na-"

"YAH!" yelled said dragon as he jumped at the stallion from behind. Spike was holding a large fishing net and as he leapt, he swung the net down, hoping to capture the intruder.

"Spike!" Twilight said as she tried to lower her heartbeat, "What are you doing?"

"Don't worry Twilight, I've got the intruder right he- Huh?" Spike said as he looked down at his empty net. "Where did he go?"

"I'm right here," said the stallion. He was standing a few feet to the side of where he was sitting.

“Oh my Celestia," said Twilight “I am so, so sorry. Spike, you apologize to him right now!"

Spike, trying to cover up his blunder, said “Twilight who knows why he’s here? Bet he came in to try and steal our stuff."

"Spike, don't be rude, he's just visiting the library." At the end of her scolding Twilight turned to the visitor and said "I'm sorry sir, he's a little hyperactive sometimes."

"Huh?” The stallion asked, “Oh yeah. Don’t worry about it.”

"Well," said Twilight, while wondering how he could be so nonchalant after a dragon, albeit a baby one, had tried to capture him, "I hope that he hasn't dissuaded you from visiting the library more often. Here, let me go set you up with a library card."

As Twilight walked off to do just that she realized that she had no idea how to make a library card for someone. As she prepared to tell the stranger the bad news, an idea struck her. She went back into the main room, and asked for the mysterious stranger to come with her. She then went up to her room, found her old note cards, and, using an old magic spell she was taught by Celestia, imprinted his image onto the card.

"There," she said, "Any books you want to check out just tell me and I'll write them on the back of this card for you."

"Cool," said the stallion, "I guess I'll check out all of those books I was reading just now."

"Oh, you're leaving already?" Twilight said, with a strange feeling of disappointment as she started to check out his books for him.

"Yeah, it's getting to be about lunchtime. Hey look, I'm pretty new here, and I don't feel like cooking my own food. I don't suppose that you could point me to a good restaurant in this town, could you?"

"Ummmm, yeah there's one good one that I know of. I'm fairly new to this town myself, you see."

"Oh really?"

"Uh-huh. Just moved in two weeks ago actually."

"Huh. Now about that restaurant."

"Oh well you see, I don't really know the address."

"Oh, that's a shame."

"We- well, maybe I could show you where it is?" Twilight said uncertainly while thinking, Maybe I could try to make a friend without almost being killed by angry goddess.

"Thanks!" the stallion said with a grin.

"Yeah, just let me finish checking these books out for you," Twilight said while calling for Spike to come and write out the book titles on the card.

-----Five Minutes Later-----

"Okay that's: Who Goes There, Jokers Wild, Orca, Artemis Foal and the Atlantis Complex, and finally The Art of War. Is that all of them?" Twilight said.

"Mm-hm!" exclaimed that stallion after waving his sleeve over the books.

“Wait don’t you want to grab your books,” Twilight said as she reached under the table to get a bag for him.

“Hungry now!” He then grabbed Twilight by the hoof and ran out the door so fast that her legs were all but swept out from under her.

Damnit that's the same hoof Spike grabbed me by, I think that leg is almost out of its socket by now. Wait, aren't I supposed to be showing him where to go? She almost looked back to tell Spike to watch the library but then decided there would be no point, because really, what were the chances of two ponies coming to the library on the same day after none had come for weeks. Shame that she didn’t though, because if she had she probably would have noticed the conspicuous lack of a stack of books.

Author's Note:

So, that's the first chapter of my first ever fanfiction. Did you like it? tell me why. Did you hate it? Tell me why. Are you confused yet? Don't worry, you will be. Leave all questions below, if either of you two people who will read this have any. Is that being to cocky? Ah, well. 'till next time.

Future edit: I have gone back an edited this chapter. I think it's much better now, but really all I did was clean it up and make Card more consistent with his character now.

Comments

[Prince Solstice]

Hmmm, not bad sir, hats off to you. If you are new around this site, allow me to introduce at least myself. I am known as Prince Solstice... Oaky ya know what fuck it, you came here for a review and her is some honesty.

That was fucking wierdly good. If that makes sense. There are a few spots that need small touch ups, and to top it off, you really need someone to proof read your chapters. Yea, everyone makes mistakes, but it's best if you go and get some people to review your work before posting. Now for some good news, your O.C wasn't an alicorn, he isn't overpowered (at least this far), and he seems like a believable character. Plus I enjoy this time frame you put it in. You might wanna work on some of the descriptions, like for actions and stuff. Now as for this writing, it's intriguing. It peaked my interest enough to just find out why he hates Pinkie Pie (+10 if you change it to loathe). Oh one more thing, and maybe it's just me, but I hate it when characters do the whole 'realize two things.' One: you spell out your numbers when doing that, and two: it feels like it lacks creativity and effort to just make them into complete thoughts. Just describe what is running through Twilight's mind. Also, I will say, you need to at least add another chapter, or change the description. Pinkie didn't come up once this chapter, and it seems like that was supposed to be a central point of this fic. Anyways, I liked it, and I hope to read/help you with more.

PM me if you want someone to review your chapters (trust me, ya do).

Final Verdict: What is up with dude's hair, like DAFUQ.

[leonidas701]

2154614 Okay, i agree, i do need a proofreader but hey i wrote this in like 30 min before the plot ran out of my head. as for pinkie, she comes in later and if this story does go as far as i want it to then believe me you will be shocked as to why he dislikes her. the whole hair thing is a chekovs gun that will go of way, WAY far in the future. i feel no shame in saying that because this story will be littered in them
as for the timeframe thing, i wanted a place where the main characters all knew each other, but didn't now each other well

[Prince Solstice]

2154648 Haha, again allow me to introduce myself. I am what is known as a bash/rage review person. I always make fun of something in the story, and rarely do I ever go full dick head mode on any story. If you wanna see that here and here. Anyways, I am serious about the proofreading though, you will need one until you get the hang of it yourself. Trust me it becomes infectious, I had to rewrite that comment twice before posting. Anywho, job well done for real though, and like I said, just PM me if you do need someone to proof read. /)

[BenRG]

Well, it's okay I suppose. The thing is that it doesn't really attract the reader and get them to come back. Okay, it's funny in places but it doesn't get us moving in the story and it doesn't hold the attention of the reader by creating a compelling enough cliff-hanger. You need to do one or both really.

[kalash93]

First piece of advice not in the review: double space between your paragraphs.

[SeekerVonYuki]

Artemis Foal and the Atlantis Complex,

Omg XD

[tsaukpaetra]

Hmm ok, a little random but I'll bite.
I'm assuming this is before twilight became good friends with the others, and apparently just after nightmare moon. Random pony shows up and kidnaps twilight, ok. Here we go then!