• Published 13th Feb 2013
  • 1,196 Views, 69 Comments

Pride and Prejudice and Ponies - arglefumph

Rarity reads her favorite romance novel, Pride and Prejudice, to her little sister Sweetie Belle.

  • ...


Rarity put down the copy of Pride and Prejudice. "That's the end of Volume One," she said. "I'll read you the rest of the story later."

"But...but I wanna know what happened!" Sweetie Belle said. "What happened to Mr. Blueblood? Why did Big Macintosh leave Fluttershy? Are Spike and Twilight really getting married?"

"You'll find out tomorrow," Rarity said. "Right now, it's time for you to go to sleep."

"Aw..." Sweetie Belle said. Then she brightened. "Hey, I'm visiting Applebloom tomorrow! Maybe I can ask Big Mac why he left!"

Rarity immediately paled. "No!" she said. "Sweetie, this is just a made-up story! It's not real! You can't talk to Big Macintosh about it."

"What about Spike? I think he should know that you secretly hate him."

"What? I adore Spikey-Wikey!" Rarity said.

"But in the story, he's annoying and mean!"

"Yes, well, that's just a story!" Rarity said. She foresaw a coming disaster, if news of this story became public knowledge. "Sweetie Belle, I want you to promise me that you won't talk about this story to anypony in the book. No talking to Twilight, to Pinkie Pie, or even to Applebloom!"

"Really? But it's a fun story!"

"Promise me!" Rarity insisted.

"Okay, I promise," Sweetie Belle said. "I won't tell any of the ponies about the story they're in. Okay?"

"That's good," Rarity said, kissing her little sister's forehead. "Good night, Sweetie Belle. I love you."

"I love you, too, Rarity."

Sweetie Belle kept her promise. She didn't tell the story to one of the ponies in the book. Instead, she told it to her friend Scootaloo, who wasn't a character in Rarity's story.

Now, obviously, it wasn't Sweetie Belle's fault that Applebloom was there too, and she heard the whole thing. And you really couldn't blame Sweetie Belle because Scootaloo told Rainbow Dash and Applebloom told Applejack. And if a few of the story's details got lost in translation, clearly, Sweetie Belle was not responsible.

The fact remains, however, that Rainbow Dash and Applejack both heard about a romantic break-up between Fluttershy and Big Macintosh. Naturally, the two of them were calm and level-headed, and they took a moment to think things through before...nah, I'm just kidding. They immediately stormed Fluttershy's cottage, where Big Macintosh was helping Fluttershy make a birdhouse.

"Ooo, be careful!" Fluttershy said. "You don't want to break it!"

Big Macintosh nodded to indicate he understood. He was about to hammer in the final nail, when the front door slammed open.

"BIG MAC!" Applejack shouted. "What in tarnation are you doin' with Fluttershy?"

"Stop right there, buddy!" Rainbow Dash shouted.

Big Macintosh accidentally dropped the hammer, smashing the birdhouse. Fluttershy was equally surprised. "Oh, hello there," she said. "What's wrong?"

"Don't act like you don't know!" Rainbow Dash said. "We heard all about your secret relationship! You've been dating for months now!"

"What?" Fluttershy gasped.

"How long did you think you could get away without tellin' us?" Applejack demanded. "Big Mac, I thought you were better than that!"

"I can't believe you two are special someponies!" Rainbow Dash said. "Why didn't you say anything?"

"Oh, oh dear," Fluttershy said. "Big Macintosh! Is...is that why you volunteered to help me?"

"Nope!" Big Mac said.

"You don't have to keep lying any more!" Applejack said. "But you do have ta explain!"

"If you've been trying to take advantage of Fluttershy, I'm going to pop you one!" Rainbow Dash threatened.

"But I—" Big Mac said.

"It's okay," Fluttershy said, putting her hoof on Big Mac's leg. "I understand."

"What?" Big Mac asked.

"You're not the first stallion who's had a little crush on me," Fluttershy said. "But I...I'm sorry, Big Macintosh. I can't be your special somepony. You're just too shy and reserved for an outgoing mare like me."

Big Mac's jaw dropped.

"I still like you, and I hope we can be friends," Fluttershy said. "Okay?"

Big Mac closed his mouth and nodded silently.

"Huh," Rainbow Dash said, scratching her head. It looked like Big Mac and Fluttershy weren't a couple. Maybe she heard wrong.

"Come on, Mac, let's get home," Applejack said. "Granny Smith's got a lot to say to ya."

Big Macintosh shook his head. Some days, I have no idea what's going on in this town, he thought.