The Colony

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War has covered all of Equestria, the Elements have been separated and Twilight Sparkle has been thrown into a world full of hate, violence, anger... and secrets.

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Comments ( 4 )

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JL-Hero

JL-Hero #1 · Jan 15th, 2013 · 2 · ·

OK, first of all: you didn't make clear that this whole thing was about human versions of the ponies (that took me by surprise), to do that just add "alternate universe" tag

now: this has a lot of potential, it really has. Just need more developing, and pacing, needs more pacing. I'll like to see where this is going but I have to advise you:

Work on the pace value, don't skip anything, and don't ever leave anything lazily written for example:

Twilight says she just want to go back to her friends, family, to Cadence, but then the Judge says she's charged with the murder of princess Mi amore Cadenza, so, what, was she transported from a human version of the "normal" equestria to a version of equestria where hate and violence are common? explain fanfic, explain!

anyway, other than that, like I said this has potential.

III Clyde The Third III

III Clyde The Third III #2 · Jan 15th, 2013 · · ·

Hmm... let me guess! Earth?

Happy_Jack

Happy_Jack #3 · Jan 15th, 2013 · · ·

Hmm, it might have potential, I'll follow this for a few chapters, see how it pans out. I mostly want to know what the hell happened between Cadence and Twilight.

Alex Wadegrove