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Big Macintosh is a strong figure who holds himself very well. Underneath his stern coat lays a shy and tender soul who is to afraid act freely. After missing out on a lot of joys of childhood play he discovers that it is okay to be himself. As well as some other fascinations.

- Possible 2-3 more chapters of story, but not for a long while (so don't get to excited =^_~= ).

Chapters (1)

Comments ( 4 )

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Regidar

Regidar #1 · Nov 30th, 2012 · · ·

Spooky

Spooky #2 · Nov 30th, 2012 · · ·

This look promising... but I'll read later... I'm trying to survive school for now

chief maximus

chief maximus #3 · Nov 30th, 2012 · · ·

I've only looked at the first few paragraphs and I can tell this needs a bit of editing. I'll most likely read the rest later, as your premise intrigued me, but here's a short list of things that could improve this fic:

Dialogue punctuation: "Hiya Macintosh!" AJ said

"Howdy Applejack," he replied.

See how that works?

Also, keep paragraphs either centered, or left side aligned. it makes it easier to read. Anyway, that's all for now!

Talon and Thorn