Sweet Beginnings Part (2) : A Pegasus-Centric Prelude

by sapphireStarzzzz

Confrontation (Lightning III)

Lightning was definitely not in the mood for an argument at the moment. Well, she never was really, so when Clematis, glaring at her in a way that she hadn't know the kind pegasus to be capable of, pulled her aside and stated, "We need to talk, Lightning", she knew her day was ruined.

"What is it?", she demanded, knowing from the sigh the other pegasus let out that she wasn't going to like this one bit.

"It's about Hurricane", Clematis stated and that spark of irritation that always rose in her chest at the mention of her brother's name flared.

"I have no time, nor interest, to hear about my brother's exploits, Clematis. Leave me alone", Lightning coolly commanded, an order which Clematis, of course, refused to follow.

"Lightning, hear me out, please", Clematis pleaded and Lightning cursed her own weakness when she heavy-heartedly replied, "What is it?"

"It's just, well, the thing is.... You're being unfair!", she finally blurted out. Unfair? Unfair how? And to whom? When she vocalised these questions, Clematis cried out,

"To Hurricane, that's whom. You've been judging him, resenting him, all for something he had no control over", Clematis took a deep breath in, before continuing more calmly,

"Lightning... I'm tired of seeing my dearest friends fighting all the time, of you always putting him down. I understand your resentment, believe me I do. What your parents did and are doing to you is wrong, but you must realise that you're doing the same thing to Hurricane", Clematis finished.

Wait.... Did she just compare her to them, to her parents. To the father who laid a hoof on his own daughter and a mother who not only did nothing to stop it, but also encouraged it.

She knew that Clematis and Hurricane were close, too close for her liking as a matter of fact, but didn't she realise how horrible he was? The part he played in this? How he would always show off how he was loved and point out that she wasn't... True, he couldn't control what he was born as, but he could control his actions.

“Yes, he couldn’t have controlled it, but he doesn’t have to keep flaunting it in my face. How well beloved he is, how our parents love him more than me. He’s utterly pathetic”, she scoffed.

She could tell that Clematis was getting irritated and while that wouldn't have bothered her all that much had it been any other pony, Clematis was the first pony who'd ever understood her. Lightning decided to try to be less insulting when talking about Hurricane around her. The key word being try. But then...

“You know sister, if you want to insult me, then do it to my face”, she heard an unfortunately familiar voice call out.

Had he eavesdropped on their conversation? How dare he, doing something so utterly invasive and uncultured! Well, if he wanted to be insulted to his face, then Lightning would be more than willing to do so.

“Well, why not? How about I tell you exactly how I feel about you”, Lightning stated harshly and from the corner of her eye, noticed Clematis moving to get between them. That absolutely wouldn't do. Nopony was going to get between her and Hurricane today, not her mother, not her father and certainly not Clematis.

She held a hoof up, gesturing her to stop, a silent command which, to her satisfaction was obeyed. “Stop. He asked for this himself”, she added, just in case.

“You are lazy and spoiled, never having worked for anything in your life. Of course not, mother and father would never let their precious heir suffer by making him do any work.

You are one of the most arrogant, selfish, inconsiderate and self-centre’s ponies I have ever met, always flaunting everything you have, never once realising how it makes others feel, always taking and taking and never once trying to understand those around you", she stated, her rage, the formidable rage that came after the coldness was starting to surface, especially when she saw the look of offence on his face.

Hurricane had no right to be offended, not after he had stolen everything that should have been Lightning's. There parents' love, pride, the heirship to the family, birthday gifts and now, even Clematis, if the way she had been defending Hurricane earlier was anything to go by. It wasn't fair! It just wasn't fair!

She continued on, her breath stuttering, but her voice steady as ever, "And most of all, you are a colt, not a filly. The colt mother and father always wanted. If only you hadn’t been born, I would’ve been the heir. And even they’d had a child again, who might’ve been a colt, they would’ve had enough time to grow to love me too.

I would’ve been father’s pride, not his punching bag. I would’ve been my mother’s darling, instead of the embarrassment she can’t even bear to look at, at times.”

Lightning sucked in a breath, all too aware of all the sensations in her body, of every sound around her, of the tension between them and the moments of silence that followed the rant.

Then, Hurricane broke the silence, asking, “Hold on a second, what exactly do you mean by father’s punching bag?”, but from the wide-eyed look on his face, she could tell that he had an idea, an idea he didn't want to accept.

After everything that had happened to Lightning, all because of Hurricane, he stood before her and had the audacity to ask what she meant? To ask what had happened. But he did, he didn't know, curious, naive, egoistical little thing.

Lightning didn't remembered what she had thought of in those few precious little moments, but she hadn't been able to control the laughter that erupted from her mouth, harsh even to her own ears. Her heart wanted to cry out, wanted her to cry out, but she couldn't, her tears on the matter had long since dried out. So she laughed instead, she laughed and laughed and couldn't stop it, even if she tried.

She could tell that her two companions were terrified and internally questioning her sanity, but why should she care?

“Sister”, Hurricane hestitantly called out. Sister, SISTER! Had they ever really been siblings?

“You never did know, did you? Never noticed the bruises, the cuts? How I used to cower in fear whenever that stallion was around. You never noticed”, she gasped through her laughter.

“You never noticed this”, she shoved her mane away, revealing a deep scar on the junction between her neck and shoulders, before bursting into another fit of laughter. She remembered how she'd gotten it. Hurricane had been crying at an event, because, well, she didn't remember why, but she had shouted at him for it in public.

It had gotten father dearest upset. After all, how could she have the audacity to humiliate his precious heir in public. He had pushed her against a table, where a knife had somehow dug into her skin Oh how hilarious, how wonderful! ANother shriek of laughter left her mouth at the thought,

“You have always been oblivious, haven’t you. But I can’t blame you, with how large your head is I doubt you can see anything beyond it”, Lightning panted, her mad laughter finally dying down and she had to gasp for breath in order to speak coherently.

Then, Hurricane replied, “Ok, this is just not fair! Yes mother and father are wrong, yes they should love you too, but it isn’t my fault! You do realise that you’re blaming me for something that isn’t my fault, the same way mother and father blamed you.!”, he cried out.

Not fair? Hadn't it been not fair when Lightning had to hide in her own house, cowering in the cupboards with fear? Hadn't it been not fair when she had begged her mother for help and had only received a cold shoulder in reply. Hadn't it been not fair when Lightning had had to fear her own father?

Yet, she had endured it all, never whining and complaining to others. Hurricane had no right to victimise himself in this situation, to feign innocence as he was doing.

“I used to wonder what I did to deserve that kind of hatred from my own sister, my own twin sister. Now I know that I didn’t. Admit it, I didn’t deserve your loathing and cutting remarks.

But I was the easy target for your anger, wasn’t I? You couldn’t take your frustrations out on mother and father, so you went for the next best thing, me. For all you talk about being more composed and rational than me, about not losing yourself to your fury, deep down you are even more prone to anger than I am."

You’ve always let your grudges and anger rule your life. You are just good at hiding it with a façade, when you want to that is. I may be arrogant”, and oh that was hard to admit, but he continued on anyway, “but you are much more prideful than me. And there’s something you are that I’m not. A HYPOCRITE!”, he ended.

No she wasn't. She was better in that regard than him. She was the one who was always in control of her temper, she was the one who didn't rub every small achievement into everypony else's faces. And she didn't take out her frustrations out on him because he was the easy target. He deserved it. He deserved everything she dished out on him.... didn't he?

Yet, a small, rather annoying part of her whispered in her head, 'Don't we? How has he ever directly wronged us. He teased us, yes, and some of his comment hit all the sore spots and insecurities in our heart, in our being, but we were always worse. Admit it, we are worse. We are a hypocrite, you are a hypocrite.

Hypocrite, hypocrite, hypocrite', suddenly there was a choir of voices chanting. She wanted it to stop, how could she make it stop. Her head hurt, with all the emotions brought to the surface, all these truths she had to accept.

With each passing moment the chanting in her head grew stronger, until it stopped. In its place, a voice echoed, "Face your flaws, little one. Tis your own guilty conscience that had been screaming in your head before I came." Okay, that voice definitely did not belong to her. What was it doing in her head? Was this some sort of mind magic?

She tried to banish it, only for it to giggle softly. "Do not worry, I mean no harm. I will not say I am your friend, for I am not. I am something more, beyond what you'll be able to comprehend right now. Follow me and I shalt make sure to steer you right.

Face your flaws", her voice echoed, before Lightning felt her presence thankfully dissipate from her mind.

The voice had told her to face her flaws, but at the end of the day, Lightning had never been able to do say. She wondered if it had been because of pride or cowardice. Perhaps a mixture of both.

But she had to, hadn't she? She had to face them, her flaws and fears both. But she where to start? How to start?

“A hypocrite”, she finally breathed out.

The silence that followed the whispered statement was discomforting. The tension in the air was thick enough to be cut with a knife.

She finally understood what Clematis had been trying to tell her. She had always blamed Hurricane for something he had no power over, just as her parents had blamed her for something she couldn't control either. But she had never seen it that way, always presenting what had happened to her as terrible, which it was, but she had always ignonre that she herself did the same to Hurricane, albeit on a much smaller scale.

And for the very first time, she acknowledged that there had been another force that had led to her acting towards him the way she did.

Jealousy.

Hurricane had everything she had ever needed and desired, and in such large amounts that he could afford to take it all for granted. She had admitted to resentment and even anger before, but it was the first time she had ever acknowleged or even known about the jealousy.

Lightning had never been the best at figuring out emotions and jealousy was so wrapped up under all the hatred, bitterness and rage, that it had been hard to separate from the others.

She looked at Hurricane. Their appearances were different, obviously, after all, they weren't identical twins. But, the amount of similarities she could see now that her eyes had been freed from that blindfold of bitterness were astonishing, to the point where she wondered if she had ever even properly looked at him before.

They had the same sleek, flyer's build, the same gravity defying, black manes. They had the same long, graceful necks and they carried themselves in a nearly identical manner, brimming with enough confidence to make everypony oround them back off and their eyes glinted in the same, dark, wild manner.

She wondered if they could've actually been siblings in another life, if they could've loved each other. What would it have been like, to have somepony she could confidently declare as family.

Time kept ticking on, but neither was willing to speak, to interrupt the powerful silence between them. At least until Lightning decided to speak up.

“That’s what Clematis told me, but she didn’t call me a hypocrite outright.”, she tilted her head, scrutinising his face, trying to get a read on his emotions. She could make out impatience, anger and sorrow. Was he mourning the relationship they could've had, just as she was

“I’ve always blamed you for all my problems, haven’t I? I always felt that it was justified for me to do so. But I suppose you’re right. In the end, I picked the easy target for my frustrations. I never thought of how you couldn’t help being a colt the same way I couldn’t help being a filly.

I think I knew that on a subconscious level, which is why I was always so focused on finding faults within you and when I did, I latched onto them and used them as a way to defend my misplaced resentment”, she stated softly, because that had been exactly what she had done.

“You did, didn’t you? But I suppose I’m also to blame in a way. I’ve always vaunted how I was mother and father’s favourite child, never once thinking how hurt you might have felt because of it”, Hurricane admitted, sighing.

“It did. It did hurt, so very much”, Lightning looked into his eyes, finally letting her guard down after so long. What did she have to hide, now though? She had revealed almost everything today, spilled the entirety of her heart out.

“I’m sorry”, Hurricane stated. “For everything’s our parents did, our father did. For how I was indirectly responsible for your pain. For putting you down over something I had no real idea about.”

“I’m sorry too. For blaming you for something that wasn’t your fault, taking my anger out on you, I just… I’m sorry too”, she trailed off, letting out a breath.

“Truce”, Hurricane grinned lopsidedly,

“Truce”, Lightning agreed, shaking his wing firmly.

Admitting to all of this, expressing her emotions and resentment, accepting her faults, apologising and being apologised to, revealing her pain, finally making up with her twin... It felt as though a burden had been lifted of her shoulders, a burden that had been there far longer than it should have been.

Something in the air had changed and Lightning simply knew that it was only a start. Things were going to change soon and she had a feeling that it would all be for the better.