Clematis shielded herself behind, braving glances when nopony was looking. The matches were intense, the opponents struck masterfully with their swords, but Clematis wasn't there for the matches. No, she was there to see her, Lightning Blaze.
She understood that battles were necessary but still she despised them. However, she had to admit that violence was a good look on Lightning.
Her dark messy mane was sticking to her shoulders due with sweat, the lemon streak in it standing out even more in the glow of the firelight. Droplets of sweat and a few drops of blood that were dripping from her sword trickled down her golden yellow coat.
Her bright onyx eyes were narrowed into slits (were black eyes supposed to be this bright? She had never thought it possible before she first laid eyes Lightning.) She remembered trying to forget those eyes during countless nights, for she couldn't, she couldn't, she wouldn't-
But she had. She had committed one of the most grievous sins of pegasuskind. She had fallen in love with another filly. She was a disgrace. What would her parents have said had they been alive? Would they have stood by her or would they have been too ashamed to have her as their daughter?
They would've probably been ashamed, embarrassed of having such a freak of a daughter. Freak, freak freak-
"Stalking again, Clematis", an obnoxiously familiar voice interrupted her train of thoughts.
"Swift Flight. Why are you here?", she sighed, tiredly. She knew that she was up for neither a battle nor a verbal exchange with her at the moment.
"Shouldn't I be the one asking you that? Shouldn't you be out there sniffing flowers and having you little animal friends braid your mane and tail? This arena is for real pegasi, after all", she sniggered. It was a mocking, pitchy sound, unlike Lightning's bark-like wholesome laugh.
"What you want!", she cried out, showing more emotion than was intended.
"You think you can become friends with Lightning Blaze, one of the best fighters of this academy, by doing all of this? You, you cowardly, orphaned beggar! What are you? Nothing! You are nothing!", she sneered, before turning around and heading back.
Tears welled up in Clematis' eyes though she willed them back, swallowing the bile that had risen in her throat. Swift's words weren't true, she told herself repeatedly. Yes she was an orphan but she was no coward nor was she a beggar. She may not be as rich as some of the other foals in the academy, but she had enough to live her life normally until she started earning.
Still, those traitorous tears kept clouding her eyes until she couldn't hold them back anymore, letting them drip from her eyes and roll down her face. After a final glance at Lightning, she fled the arena.
She ran out, half trotting, half flying, before she reached the edge of the great cloud structure that was her training camp and took off, flapping her wings a bit before pushing them back and gently gliding down.
It was lucky for her, she supposed, that the camp was just above the semper-liber forest. She had always loved wildlife. She wondered sometimes if her parents had foreseen this, naming her after a plant as they had. Plant based names were almost non-existent in the pegasus community, prevalent among only the Earth Ponies.
Clematis landed right in the middle of the forest, momentarily wondering whether the trainers would wonder where she was. She shook her head. They were used to foals going to the forest to test themselves by fighting the monsters and dangerous beasts. Of course they wouldn't notice.
As soon as her hooves touched the ground, all the animals nearby crowded her. To be more specific, al the children. Lion and cheetah cubs, the rabbit kits, kittens, puppies, fledgling sparrows.
Their parents didn't come, they trusted her with their children. It was lucky they didn't make an appearance or at least one of the prey animals would've ended up as dinner. The children were too young to hunt, thankfully.
A little baby elephant stomped over to her, pushing every other creature aside and wrapped its trunk around her hoof, pulling gently, as though trying to take her somewhere.
"What is it precious one", Clematis cooed.
The elephant calf made a series of loud trumps which Clematis translated as, "plant hurt, do magic". Unfortunately, the calf was too young to construct proper sentences, though she understood the message. Had she mentioned that she had this weird ability to converse with animals?
"Show me, little one", she said and the calf, letting go of her hoof, started stomping away, looking back to make sure that she was following him.
She walked behind him, until he shoved his trunk forward, pointing to a dwarf tree. The bark of the plant seemed to have been chopped into half. Poor plant. It seemed as though it had been that way for quite a while. The leaves had already started dying.
She closed her eyes, searching until she felt her magic welling up in her wings. She gentle stroked the bark of the tree with the tip of one of her wings. She concentrated hard, sending out some of her magic to the tree. It wasn't a specific spell, simply pure magic. Her eyes fluttered open and in front of her, the tree stood, its leaves alive, its bark fixed.
"There, all fixed up", she murmured , more to the tree than the young elephant, leaning her forehead against the healed bark. Other ponies may have found that odd, but plants were alive too. Just because they couldn't make communicate, couldn't move from one place to another, didn't mean they couldn't feel.
Suddenly, she heard a sharp whistle. Startled, she looked from side to side, searching for the source of the noise. When not spotting anything unusual, she concluded that it must have been a bird.
"An impressive bit of magic over there"
Apparently not.
She turned around, coming face-to-face with a colt. His coat was as red as a candy apple, his short wind-blown mane and tail a dual of maroon and black. He had cerulean blue eyes that matched the colour of the skies.
"You're Hurricane Twist, aren't you? Record holder for the most won spear fights, Lightning Blaze's twin brother", Clematis raised a brow.
His smile, which had turned a shade smug at the mention of his record, turned into a grimace at the last bit. She wondered if there was an argument or rivalry between them.
"That's me alright, darling", he winked cheerily, the grimace on his face swiftly replaced by a brilliant grin. She supposed he was handsome. She may have even been attracted to him, just as many other fillies were. If she was normal, she bitterly thought.
"Also said to be the biggest flirt in the academy, if I am right", she deadpanned.
"I have no idea where I got that reputation from, sweetheart", he replied, but his grin widened even further.
"Sheesh, I wonder", she grumbled.
"So you do have some spunk in you! I wouldn't have thought, after the whole incident with Swift", he huffed.
"Wait, you saw that", horror dawned upon her. This colt, this stranger had heard Swift Flight insult her, seen her break down afterwards.
"How could you just let her say all of that to you? How could any pegasus let somepony say such things about them?", he exclaimed.
"It's not like she was wrong", she ruefully laughed. "Besides, her words did not upset me all that much. They were just the tipping point", she admitted.
"Still, if I were in your place I would've already challenged her to a duel, beautiful or not", he mumbled the last part but Clematis still heard it. She raised a brow, though internally she couldn't help but agree. Swift was as beautiful on the outside as she was ugly on the inside.
"I don't like fighting, I've never had", she shrugged, turning away.
"I don't understand your way of thinking, I love fighting and battles, but to each their own, love. But still, you should stand up for yourself. Battles are sometimes necessary. You like nature, don't you? Well, predators eat prey, don't they, only those who are strong survive, right? And guess what, you're acting like a prey animal, running away instead of standing your ground, darling", he pointed out.
When he put it that way... It did sound pathetic, not fighting back. She loved all animals equally of course, but if she were to be one of them, she'd rather not be the prey or worse, a weak predator.
"You do have a point", she admitted. "And stop calling me darling."
"Sure, whatever you say, sweetheart", he laughed and flew off. She shoo her head but couldn't keep a smile off her face. She had finally gained a friend, at least she hoped so.
"Hey didn't I tell you to leave. This arena is for fighters, actual pegasi, not wimps", Swift's loud obnoxious voice said in what the other filly thought was a commanding tone, though to Clematis it was simply a too scratchy sound.
"What is it with you and coming after me? Careful, or one might think that you have ah, other intentions", Clematis replied.
It seemed to take Swift some time to comprehend the underlaying meaning. After all, being accused of being a dyke was not an everyday occurrence. Clematis felt like a hypocrite, accusing somepony of being exactly what she herself was, but it was overshadowed by the spark of satisfaction at Swift's noticeable flinch.
"How dare you!", Swift growled and her hoof flew forwards, about to strike her in the face but Clematis caught it, much to her own surprise and twisted. There was a sickening snap that indicated a broken bone. Swift yelped, cradling her now broken hoof, her expression shocked and horror-struck.
"Please leave me be", Clematis stated politely, as though she hadn't just broken Swift's hoof. The other filly shot her a scathing glare but did as she was told, flying away without a word.
Clematis couldn't believe herself. She had just willingly broken a bone, she had just willingly hurt somepony. It was surreal and disgusting, yet so satisfying...
No, Swift Flight had it coming for a long time. Besides, in the nature, only the toughest survive.
"Huh, guess you do get to see miracles every now and then", a voice remarked.
"Hurricane", she greeted, turning around.
"For somepony who doesn't like fighting, that was quite brave. I never did get your name though", he remarked.
"Really? You followed and gave advice to somepony whose name you didn’t even know? It is Clematis by the way", she replied.
"Rare name, I must say. And as for following somepony I didn’t know, well, I was intrigued", he shrugged.
"Anyway, thanks for encouraging me, I guess", she said.
"You guess! Come on, I was the epitome of encouraging, if I do say so myself. By the way, do you know you look absolutely gorgeous when you're enraged, darling?", he smirked.
"Didn't I tell you to not call me darling?", Clematis raised an eyebrow.
"Sure, whatever you say sweetheart", he grinned and walked away. She resisted the urge to groan. That, that utter coquet...
"You looked quite cozy with my brother over there", a voice remarked. Clematis turned around, snapping, "Who in the name- Lightning Blaze"
"Yes, that would be me. Why, do you know of me?", Lightning quirked an eyebrow.
"You've hold the record for the most won sword fights in the academy. Of course I know you", Clematis fibbed casually, unwilling to explain that her reasons for knowing Lightning were vastly different.
"Can I ask what you meant by 'looking cozy with your brother'?", she inquired.
"Aren't you involved? I assumed you were the unlucky filly who got to be his fillyfriend of the month", she scoffed.
"No, we're not involved. But even if we were, why do you care? Hurricane has had multiple affairs."
"I just came to warn you. Whether you are his friend or fillyfriend, do keep in mind that he is a horrible, arrogant philanderer. I suggest you stay far away from him, for your own good", Lightning coldly replied.
Clematis was torn. On one hoof Lightning was the object of her infatuation while on the other hoof Hurricane was her first ever friend, who had encouraged her, no matter how pushy he had been. Her choice was made.
"Please don't insult my friend in front of me. Any further disparaging will have me compelled to tell him", she stated, just as coolly as Lightning.
"Very well then, so be it. If you wish to be a pathetic little whore, then who am I to stop you", with a final scathing look in her direction, Lightning turned away.
Clematis felt as though her heart had been shattered into a million pieces.
Gain is gain, in whatever form it may appear (Hurricane I)
Hurricane knew he was a flirt (honestly, if he had been blessed with good looks, why shouldn’t he use them), spoiled (really, the only pony who had called his that was Lightning, who was just bitter that their parents recognised how great he was and how not great she was) and he knew he was arrogant (was it really bragging if it was true?).
However, he also knew that he was a gallant at heart, so of course he had to comfort this beautiful filly who was belittled by Swift Flight and ran away in tears.
And beautiful she was, with her neon green coat that shone in the sunlight, her naturally flowing pine green mane with seafoam streaks. Her eyes though, were especially beautiful and quite unique as well. They were a bright yellow, like a wolf’s, except, more ponish.
Thus, he decided to follow her. She was running and her wings were spread out, her hooves barely touching the ground, telling him that she was going to take off. What he hadn’t expected was that she was going to go to the forest. Fool. Didn’t she know what dangerous beasts resided in there?
Had it been anypony else, it would not have been worrying, however, if somepony couldn’t even stand up to a fellow pegasus, how could they fight monsters and wild animals? Maybe it was a bit condescending, however, he didn’t expect the filly’s fighting skills to be all that great.
It was then, that all of a sudden, a lion cub emerged from the bushes. It was big, around the same size as an average teenage filly and a bit shorter than a typical teenage colt. Which meant it was just a little shorter than Hurricane. That would make it easier for him to kill it should it attack.
He summoned his spear with a burst of magic and grasped it, waiting for the right moment to attack, when the filly did the most astonishing thing that he had ever seen. She petted the cub and much to his confusion, the lion seemed to actually like it, if its purring was anything to go by. He decided to banish his spear back to his dorm.
Soon enough, a whole gathering of baby animals had surrounded her, and she seemed to be talking to them. And not the “who’s the good boy, yes you are”, talking, but actually conversing with them, as though she could understand them. How odd.
Then an elephant calf made it’s way to her and she followed it to who knows where after it trumpeted and tugged at her. Therefore, Hurricane too trailed after it. He hoped that whatever the purpose the elephant was taking the filly away for was exciting.
It wasn’t. Well, it was impressive, but not the action-packed impressive that Hurricane had been hoping for. The elephant had led them to a dead tree. What now?
The filly seemed to understand why, though, for she walked towards the tree purposefully. She started stroking the tree with one of her wings, channelling her magic and sending it into the tree. She didn’t really think that she could bring a dead tree back to life, did she?
Apparently she did, as she kept sending bursts of raw magic into the tree. As for how he knew it was raw magic, well, Pegasus and earth ponies usually used raw magic for their purposes. It was only the unicorns who insisted on using spells. Spells were more precise, according to them.
It actually worked, much to his amazement. The dead leaves were now a healthy green, the bark rejoining. Soon the tree stood erect and proud.
Most pegasi would’ve sputtered at seeing this, questioning just how could a weakling like her be capable of something like that, but Hurricane wasn’t most like most pegasi. Instead, he whistled loudly, calling out,
“An impressive bit of magic over there”
She turned around, finally aware of his presence. He gave her his best grin, one that made even the toughest, coldest fillies swoon, but this particular filly seemed to be unfazed, much to his chargrin.
“You’re Hurricane Twist aren’t you, record holder for most won spear fights”, she stated and he couldn’t help but internally preen. But then she just had to add, “Lightning Blaze’s twin brother.”
He tried not to acknowledge that they were related, even though the entire camp knew that they were twins. He then realised that his smile had become more of a grimace and was quick to correct that.
“That’s me alright, sweetheart”, he winked, hoping to at least see a blush on her face, but alas, her heart seemed to be made of stone or maybe she was just too idiotic.
The first option seemed to be the case, for then she stated, “Also said to be the biggest flirt in the academy, if I’m right”, looking all unimpressed. Still, he didn’t let that get him down. At least his reputation preceded him.
"I have no idea where I got that reputation from, sweetheart", he responded to the, admittedly true, accusation with as much grace as he could.
"Sheesh, I wonder", she grumbled. He was slightly surprised. This did not sound like the filly who had crumbled before Swift Flight.
"So you do have some spunk in you! I wouldn't have thought, after the whole incident with Swift", he relayed his surprise.
The filly seemed to be horrified, and rightly so, as she replied, “Wait, you saw that!”
He finally came to the point he had been most curious about. "How could you just let her say all of that to you? How could any pegasus let somepony say such things about them?“, he inquired, his voice unwillingly leaning towards the more emotional side rather than the casual tone he had hoped to maintain.
"It's not like she was wrong", she ruefully laughed. "Besides, her words did not upset me all that much. They were just the tipping point", she admitted.
This filly had inferiority complexes alright. Speaking of inferiority complexes, he’d always suspected that Lightning had them. It would explain why she was always so cold and bitter.
"Still, if I were in your place I would've already challenged her to a duel, beautiful or not", he mumbled the last part. He knew better than to compliment another filly in front the filly he was trying to date, or at least flirt with.
"I don't like fighting, I've never had", she shrugged, turning away.
A Pegasus who didn’t like fighting! Next she would be saying that she was exchanging her wings for a horn and becoming a prissy unicorn! Still, he managed to keep his feelings regarding the statement under check, replying in a blasé manner.
"I don't understand your way of thinking, I love fighting and battles, but to each their own, love. But still, you should stand up for yourself. Battles are sometimes necessary. You like nature, don't you? Well, predators eat prey, don't they, only those who are strong survive, right? And guess what, you're acting like a prey animal, running away instead of standing your ground, darling", he pointed out, hoping that the nature comparison would help her see things from his perspective.
He questioned himself why he cared so much, when the answer came to him. Pegasi were a warrior race and a pegasus not wanting to fight was an insult to his pride. Plus, the filly was gorgeous and he’d always had a weakness for pretty faces.
After a while, she replied, "You do have a point". "And stop calling me darling”, she added. She definitely had no interest in him then. But he still hoped that they could be friends.
"Sure, whatever you say, sweetheart", he laughed and flew off. That didn’t mean he couldn’t tease.
Hurricane was yet again met with the sight of Swift insulting his new friend, who, he embarrassedly realised he still didn’t know the name of.
"Hey didn't I tell you to leave. This arena is for fighters, actual pegasi, not wimps", Swift scoffed. Ok, there was no way he was going to stand this. But just as he started approaching them, his friend replied,
"What is it with you and coming after me? Careful, or one might think that you have ah, other intentions", she smirked and Hurricane choked on his own spit.
There was creative insults and there was just, that. It was good to know that there was still some hope for her.
“How dare you!”, Swift growled, her hoof flying forwards. Ok, this time he was definitely going to intervene, when his friend, astonishing him yet again, and by the looks of it, Swift as well, caught the hoof and twisted it until he heard a soft crack.
Hurricane winced sympathetically when Swift yelped and cradled her hoof. That’s got to have hurt. Of course, that didn’t stop him from being extremely proud of his friend.
"Please leave me be", his friend stated, politely, as though she just hadn’t utterly humiliated Swift Flight, who, despite shooting the other a scathing glare, did what was asked.
"Huh, guess you do get to see miracles every now and then", Hurricane couldn’t help but remark.
"Hurricane", she greeted, turning around.
"For somepony who doesn't like fighting, that was quite brave. I never did get your name though", he remarked.
"Really? You followed and gave advice to somepony whose name you didn’t even know? “, she said incredulously.
When she put it that way, it did come across as a little creepy.
“It’s Clematis, by the way”, she added. Fitting, considering her way with plants and animals, though it was a bit of a unique name. ‘A unique name for a unique filly’, he couldn’t help but muse.
"Rare name, I must say. And as for following somepony I didn’t know, well, I was intrigued", he shrugged, trying to pass it off as a normal occurrence.
"Anyway, thanks for encouraging me, I guess", she said.
"You guess! Come on, I was the epitome of encouraging, if I do say so myself. By the way, do you know you look absolutely gorgeous when you're enraged, darling?", he smirked.
"Didn't I tell you to not call me darling?", Clematis raised an eyebrow.
"Sure, whatever you say sweetheart", he grinned and walked away. Well, he may not have gained a new fillyfriend but at least he gained a new friend.
When Lightning Blaze was angry, she wasn’t angry. She was just cold, apathetic, until she was pushed over the edge. Then she became a monster, raging and uncontrolled. The opposite of Hurricane really, who’s temper was furious and hot, quick to rise, but just as easy diffuse.
She liked not having something in common with her brother. Proud that she was still rational in her rage, proud that when her temper truly rose even beyond the rationality that she was so proud of, she was more terrifying than him.
That filly (Clematis, she had been informed when she had asked one of her followers; yes they were followers, not friends) had come quite close to pushing her over that edge of rationality. There were many things she could tolerate, but putting her before Hurricane was unforgivable to her.
Some may consider this reason petty, and perhaps sometimes when she thought of that encounter, a part of her thought it petty too, after all the filly was just defending her friend, but she ignored that tiny part of her head. She had always been seen as the inferior twin by her parents, just because of the gender she was born as.
It wasn’t her fault that she was born a filly and not a colt, but she had been blamed for that transgression all her life. To be treated the same way by a stranger, though not for the same reasons, made her blood boil.
(She won’t say it, she won’t acknowledge it, but it also makes a part of her recall the scared little filly who used to hide in the dingiest, smallest cupboard in the fortress in order to escape her father’s rage after one too many times of insulting her brother in front of him.
It also makes her recall the weak little filly who had later examined the consequent bruises in the bathroom mirror. Who had ached to have somepony to hold her, love her, comfort her but didn’t.)
“Sister”, said devil’s voice called out, and she was proud to say that her “Yes”, of reply was quite even, even though she and Hurricane had not had a proper conversation for the past three years.
“I just came here to say that you won’t be able to stay back at the academy during the summer hols this time around. Cousin Fleet Fly’s initiation ceremony is going to take place and Uncle and Aunt were asking about you. Father thinks it might start rumours if you didn’t attend”, he hesitantly stated.
She wished she could tell him that she didn’t give a damn, to not show up, but unfortunately, while the camp allowed students to stay during winter and summer hols, it was against the rules for the students to stay back during Sanguis Fernweh, commemorating the blood shed by the pegasus, general Fernweh, during the Pony-Zebra war, the last time the three pony races had been recorded to have worked together.
Saying what she truly wanted to would mean consequences. The Sanguis Fernweh holidays may be brief, but not brief enough for her to escape the consequences.
“I still don’t understand why you’re always so upset with me, mother and father”, Hurricane had the nerve to carry on. “Sure they might show a bit of favouritism every now and then, but it isn’t all that horrible.”
She felt an icy coldness seep into her veins, her blood, as it did whenever she was enraged. How could he not know?! Her suffering was all his fault and he dared to not know, to be so casual about it.
“I think I can decide for myself what is horrible and what isn’t, little brother.” She loved calling him little brother, relishing in the fact that though it was only by a few minutes, she was at least superior to him in age.
He frowned, but backed away, departing. Good, the sooner he was out of her sight, the better she would feel.
She wanted to scream, to shout and rage, but all she felt was cold.
There were times when Lightning wondered if there was something wrong with her or was it just destiny that hated her. At the moment, as she packed her bags for the summer, she was more inclined to choose the second.
“Hey Lightning”, Hurricane gestured, still a bit wary after the earlier fight.
“What is it?”, she narrowed her eyes.
“My friend, Clematis, will be staying with us for a few days. You don’t mind, do you?”, he asked.
Since when did he care about her opinion? Still, she answered, “Not particularly”
Her anger at the filly had been pushed away after Hurricane told her of the demand from their father.
“Alright. Are you going to fly home alone? We are going to the same place, maybe you could come with me, sister”, he offered, an infuriating grin replacing his reluctance, much to her irritation.
“No need for that, brother”, she said the word brother mockingly. “I’d prefer to fly alone”, she rebuffed.
“Whatever suits your needs”, he shrugged.
She used to wonder what she loathed the most about Hurricane. Their parents spooling him, is scandalous ways, his ego or his nonchalance. She later realised that it depended on the circumstances. At the moment, it was his nonchalance.
“Farewell. I hope you make it to our fortress alright”, Hurricane stated.
Lightning replied, “Farewell to you as well. I hope your travels are safe as well”, mostly out of obligation and habit. It was only after Hurricane was gone, that she too headed home.
Taking in a deep breath, Lightning stretched her wings out and with slow, sturdy flaps, took off the ground. After flapping for a while, she started pushing the air back, like an eagle.
Lightning loved to fly. The wind in her face, rustling her mane, going past her wings. Flying seemed to give her a weightlessness, as though she was leaving all of her troubles behind. It was only her, the air and the sky. The freedom was intoxicating, like alcohol, or maybe even a drug.
A storm cloud stood in her way, though she went right through it, momentarily clasping her wings tightly to her body, before spreading the out yet again.The lightning singed her mane and her hooves, sending a sharp stings of pain through her, though all she did was laugh wildly. Anypony who would’ve seen her in the moment would’ve though her to be an insane madmare.
Soon, much to soon in her opinion, the journey ended and the cold walls of her parents' fortress greeted her.
Only aa second after she landed, that the red blur that was her brother arrived as well.
"Good to see that you have arrived", he said in greeting.
"You as well", she replied half-heartedly.
Hurricane strode forwards confidently, with a reluctant Lightning in tow. He knocked the doors confidently, tackling their mother in a hug, who smiled and returned the hug with a delighted expression on her face, at least until her eyes fell on Lightning. Her smile turned sour, her blue eyes eyes.
"Good evening, daughter", she greeted through pursed lips, her tone polite, but her grimace suggesting that she was less-than-happy to see her.
"Good evening, mother", her own mouth echoing her mother's grimace.
"Your room has been set up", she stated and the gleam in her eyes told Lightning all she needed to know, what remained unsaid. She wasn't welcome here. Her parents were only fulfilling obligations and that was it.
The two kept staring at each other for a while, not breaking eye contact at all, at least until Hurricane interrupted them.
"Mother, can one of my friends come over for the hols? She'll only be staying for a few days"
"Well, it is a yes from me, but do your father first. Though he'll say yes", she beamed at her beloved son, who once again gave her a hug, before rushing away, probable to seek father out.
Meeting her father, however horrible, was inevitable, she knew. She was lucky enough to not have run into him the entire day. But she knew she would have to face him at dinner. She had prepared herself for this. But facing him in reality was something else.
Sanguis Fernweh only occurred once in four years, on twenty-ninth Febuary, which meant that she hadn't had to come home for about four years. She hadn't had to face him for almost four years.
"So, you're back again", he at her contemptuously, as though he wasn't the one who had summoned her here, in this cold, gigantic fortress that was more of a prison to her than a home.
"Yes", she replied, suppressing the urge to look down, forcing herself to meet his dark eyes, eyes that so closely resembled her that there were days when she couldn't bear to look at her own reflection in the mirror.
"I see they don't teach manners at Flight Academy. Answering back to your father this way, utterly disgraceful", he scowled.
"I was only answering your question, father", she evenly replied.
He didn't reply, but his harsh, cold glare spoke volumes.
Hurricane had invited Clematis to stay with him during the summer and though she had accepted, she was quite nervous.
According to Hurricane's description, his house was a fortress, a proper, military fortress that only the upper-class pegasi lived in. Her little cottage near the woods, with it's thatched roof, the paint on the walls wearing off, was a joke in comparison.
Hurricane seemed to have caught onto her discomfort, if his constant questioning was anything to go by, however he was unable to pinpoint the reason behind it, naive as he was about economic status and other such social and political matters.
There was also another reason that she had been reluctant to accept Hurricane's invitation and that reason was Lightning Blaze.
One would have thought that after the cruel, humiliating words Lightning had spoken to her during their first and last encounter, she would have stopped pining after her.
Unfortunately, that was not the case. She felt angry, sure, after all, she was neither irrational nor blind, but she could also see things from Lightning's perspective. She had only been warning Clematis of the flaws Clematis knew Hurricane possessed, under the mistaken assumption that Clematis was Hurricane's fillyfriend. It had hurt her pride when Clematis rebuffed her.
Arsenal the dog's soft barks diverted her attention from her train of thoughts. He sniffed a bit, before rubbing his head against her hoof in a comforting manner.
Ms Tweedle the robin and Mr Welbert the blue jay flew down and ran their beaks through her mane, chirping softly.
"Thank you for your support, I truly do appreciate it", she smiled at her animal friends. Winnie and Wimber the snakes coiled around her in a protective manner in response.
She got up abruptly, much to the snakes', birds' and dog's agitation, her eyes gleaming with a newfound confidence. It was only for a week and it wasn't like Hurricane's parents knew about her economical. Neither did Hurricane, now that she thought about it.
Levitating a piece of parchment, a quill and an ink pod out out of the drawer, she began writing.
Dear Hurricane....
Everything had been going well so far.
Her encounter with Hurricane's father had been short, but during it he had been slightly gruff, but nice enough.
Hurricane's mother had been kind, but a little implicative before Clematis clarified that she had absolutely no romantic interest in Hurricane. That had been quite an awkward conversation but it was all sorted out.
Hurricane had been excited to see her, his eyes lighting up like a little foal's. All bravado had been abandoned now that he was safely sequestered in his home.
"You're here!", he exclaimed, squeezing her in a tight hug. She actually'd had to double take and make sure it was really him. It was hard to reconcile the image of the arrogant, flirty badcolt she knew with this adorable puppy-like pony.
"Yes, I am. Will you show me around or not?", she raised a brow.
"Yes yes, of course", he grinned. "Race you!", he yelled, flapping his wings hard, with Clematis at his tail. Soon, Clematis had to stop once the two had almost flown halfway through the entire fortress four times, while Hurricane, in a display of his superior stamina and speed, pulled through without too much effort, winning the race much to her chagrin.
"We should race again", Hurricane suggested with a smirk.
"Why, because you want to keep winning again and again", she sourly responded.
"Oh come on, don't be sore-loser, darling", he elbowed her lightly.
"How many times have I told you, don't call me darling", she growled and much to her irritation, he burst into laughter.
"Race you!", he announced, speeding away on his wings.
"Wait, Hurricane! I'm tired", she yelled after him, panting, but to no avail. He was long gone.
Wait, where exactly was she? All this while, she had been simply been going wherever Hurricane went, not really noting here she went.
She put her head in her hooves and groaned as she realised that she was lost. Damned Hurricane! What now? She supposed she could teleport out, but she couldn't picture the damned front door of the fortress and there was no way she'd be able to teleport all the way back home.
Well, Hurricane had taken a left turn and then a right turn before disappearing out of sight. She should start with that. Then she would think about what she'd do next.
She started tracing Hurricane's path as far as she could, which honestly wasn't too far, until she couldn't anymore. And then, she was lost.
Completely, utterly lost. Urgh, honestly, curse Hurricane! He was a horrible, arrogant, bastard- Just then, somepony bumped into her.
"Oh, I'm so sorry. I should've been paying atten......tion", she trailed off when she laid her eyes on just who she had bumped into.
"Yes, I am", she replied, her eyes never leaving Lightning's.
"I wanted to apologise, for all the things I said the last time we spoke. It was an.... overreaction", Lightning hesitantly stated, much to her surprise. Lightning, from what she had observed, was quite prideful. Even now, it was evident that it had taken a lot for her to actually admit that she'd been mistaken out loud.
"I- It's alright", she replied.
"What are you doing you doing here all alone?", Lightning inquired, her brow raised. "Where is my brat of a brother?"
"We were having a race, but I got lost", she admitted.
"Just like Hurricane, inconsiderate and always expecting ponies to act and think the way he does", Lightning spat, before adding, "Where were you racing to? I'll show you the way, if you want me to."
"Nowhere in particular. Just exploring around the place", she replied. Speaking of the place, it was the first time she actually took a proper look at it. It was built of bricks, painted a dark grey. With its grey walls, spikes, weaponry hung on the wall for easy access, it cast quite a foreboding aura. A proper military fortress, to say the least. Certainly nothing unicorns would have in their mansions and castles.
For once she felt lucky to not be from a rich family. Having to spend her entire life in such cold, terrifying place seemed like a terrible prospect. She would pick her cozy little cottage over this any day.
Lightning caught her looking at the walls and stated, "Probably thinking you got the treat of a lifetime, aren't you? Getting to live in such a massive fortress", she scoffed in a way that had anger bubbling up in Clematis' stomach. Crush or no, Lightning was going too far, taking a jab at Clematis' status.
Any other pegasus would've probably attacked Lightning, but Clematis simply pursed her lips, pushing back tears that had momentarily threatened to stream down her eyes. It was true, wasn't it? She was nothing compared to Lightning and Hurricane. Goodness, why was she even here in the first place? Why had she accepted Hurricane's stupid invitation? She wanted to go back home.
Swallowing a lump in her throat, she replied with false bravado, "I was thinking more along the lines of how I can't entirely blame you for being so unpleasant to be around; growing up in such a terrible environment likely had a hoof in it."
When Lightning's eye twitched, she took it as a sign of victory. Hey, she was allowed some vindictiveness after basically being everypony's punchbag during most of her life.
"I apologise", Lightning sighed, pursing her lips. "We'll be staying here together for a while, so we should try to at least be civil to each other", she then added sternly, as though Clematis was the one starting all the fights between them.
Still, Clematis controlled her temper and held back a sniping response to the best of her abilities. Instead, she replied calmly, “I agree. Let's say, we have a truce", she extended her wing, to which Lightning responded by wrapping her own wing around the offered one and giving it a firm shake.
Clematis felt feeling a shiver crawl up her spine at the touch. Lightning's wing was firm because of being exercised so much, but at the same time so soft to the touch, so warm....
She shook her head, internally berating herself for her train of thoughts, all the while accepting that her infuriating crush on Lightning, despite how horrible she was towards Clematis, would never fade.
"Are you alright", Lightning asked. The hint of concern in her voice was almost Clematis' undoing, she could feel the heat rising to her cheeks.
"You look red, perhaps you are ill. Come, I'll take you to the infirmary", Lightning stated firmly in a way that almost had Clematis swoon, much to her embarrassment. She wasn't some unicorn damsel, for goodness sake!
"No, I feel fine. probably jut the heat getting to me or something", Clematis choked out. Then Lightning mumbled weakling under her breath and everything was back to normal.
She wondered since when she had started considering this normal. After all, only about a month ago, normal for her was discretely eyeing Lightning while she was playing her matches, getting bullied by Swift Flight, training, going to the forest to spend time in the nature, with her animals friends and repeat.
"Truce, remember", she pointed out.
"Yes, yes, I know. Truce", Lightning said in a way that reminded Clematis of a time when her parents were alive and the way she used to get annoyed and whine when they repeatedly reminded her to do her chores before they went to work.
The parallel almost made her giggle, before a deep sense of sorrow settled in her chest. She missed them so much...
"Hey, what's gotten into you", Lightning asked, frowning.
"Nothing", she quickly replied, though from the shrewd look in Lightning' eyes, she could tell that her lie had been caught.
“You really need to work on your lying skills you know. It’s almost like you’ve never told a lie before”, Lightning stated in a way that had Clematis wondering whether Lightning could ever say a word without sounding utterly condescending .
“What’s the matter?”, Lightning asked.
“Aren’t you being nosy”, Clematis said in reply, raising an eyebrow.
“Maybe, I don’t really care”, Lightning shrugged.
“I can tell”, Clematis snapped, to which Lightning shrugged again.
“So, what is bothering you so much?”, Lightning asked.
Normally, Clematis never talked about her parents and especially not about their deaths, but she had a feeling that Lightning wouldn’t leave her alone until she said something.
“Well, I was just thinking about my parents”, she finally replied truthfully. A part of her felt uncomfortable with the subject, the part that had always urged her to keep her pains and sorrows to herself, but a smaller part was oddly eager to finally share this with somepony.
“Your parents?”, Lightning asked, urging her to continue.
“They died a few years ago. Phoenix Flu”, she carried on. No tears came to her eyes, they never did. She had already cried so much when her father and then mother had fallen ill, seeing their weak condition being unbearable for her. She had actually been glad when they had finally died.
It had been what had pushed her to learn the healing magic she often used to regenerate trees and cure animals. She hoped, someday, that she would be adept enough to heal ponies and other sapient beings as well.
“I apologise for pressuring you into telling this to me. You have my most heartfelt condolences”, Lightning stated softly.
“Thank you”, Clematis replied, equally as soft.
“Do you miss them”, Lightning asked. Her lilt was more curious than the apologetic and sympathetic it had previously been, as though she couldn’t understand why Clematis would miss her parents.
“Of course I do”, Clematis responded, frowning.
“I wouldn’t, if I were in you shoes. I would’ve bidden my parents good riddance had they been in your parents place”, Lightning spat venomously.
Clematis recoiled. How could anypony wish that their parents were dead, when she would cut off a limb just to get a chance to see them one last time.
As though sensing her thoughts, Lightning added, “I’m sure your parents must have been good ponies who loved you a lot, but that isn’t the case with my parents. They have always preferred Hurricane and ignored my existence, just because I ‘m a filly, not a colt. And whenever I dare to speak against them….”, Lightning rubbed her neck as though it ached and Clematis understood just then.
It made sense, with how their seemed to be a rift between Hurricane and Lightning, how Lightning always stayed at camp for the holidays. She did wonder though, why Lightning would share this with her of all ponies. Why Lightning, self-assured and prideful as she was, would reveal this.
As though reading her mind, Lightning replied to her unasked question, “I pressurised you into revealing personal information. It’s only fair I reciprocate the gesture.
Besides, you’re like me. You’re broken too”
‘You’re broken too’, these words echoed in the corridors. It was such a simple statement but so powerful utterly true that it shook Clematis’ very being.
This was something Hurricane would never understand, growing up as he had with love, affection and all sorts of luxuries presented before him. And, with a jolt, Clematis realised that what she felt for Lightning was not just a simple crush or attraction. It was love, unadulterated love. True, so true, yet so impure, it’s foundations marred by sorrow.
The very next day that she came home, Lightning was surprisingly approached by her father. Quite a rarity, considering he usually didn’t like having anything to do with the disappointment, which was a good thing as Lightning didn’t wish to have anything to do with him either.
She felt the familiar twinge of fear that she felt every singe le time she saw him, though she stamped it down stubbornly. She felt the urge to run, but she forced herself to stay still and asked, “What can I do for you today, father?”
“As you know, Fleet Fly’s initiation is coming up”, he began. She could tell that this was just as hard for him as it was for her.
“Yes, I indeed know.” After all, it was the reason she had been forced to come home.
“And, you must also know that Hurricane’s friend shall be staying with us for a few days”, he added.
“Yes, I do”, she replied.
“Behave yourself at Fleet’s ceremony. I won’t me able to face my brother or his wife if you did anything to ruin their son’s night”, he warned, his eyes narrowing.
“I will, father”, Lightning replied.
“And-“, he held his hoof up as Lightning started leaving. “Hurricane told me that you ill-treated his friend.” Hah, ill-treated. Nothing that whore hadn’t deserved, her rage at the other filly renewing, especially when her father tightly gripped her hair and pulled harshly, sending a sting of pain to her scalp.
“I expect you apologise to her and aid her with whatever she might need during her visit.”
“Yes father”, she replied, biting the inside of her cheek to not let any signs of pain show.
He scanned her face, as though trying to gauge signs of insincerity. He seemed to have found none, however, as he let go and replied, “Good”, and left shortly thereafter.
Lightning wasn’t angry, no, anger filled her with numbness and her mind came up with just the right words to say to hurt somepony. What she was feeling right now was a spark of irritation that actually sparked her mane with lightning. As soon as she realised it, she hurriedly levitated some dry dirt using her magic and dropped it all on her mane. Great, just great. Now she wasn’t simply annoyed, but her mane was also dirty.
Lightning had a nice, long, hot shower after which, she decided to walk around, when she saw her. Clematis.
She was looking around, seeming to be confused and a little frustrated. Lightning heard her cursing her brother’s name under her breath, at which she couldn’t help but smirk. What, she was a vindictive pony and wasn’t feeling all that favourable towards Hurricane after he had told her father that she had ill-treated his friend.
Her amusement, however, faded when she realised that this was the perfect time to apologise to Clematis. And she did not like that at all.
Still, gathering every bit of her patience, she approached the filly, opening her mouth to announce her presence, when Clematis turned around and bumped right into her. Oh for Fernweh’s sake!
"Oh, I'm so sorry. I should've been paying atten......tion", Clematis trailed of as she seemed to realise just who she had bumped into.
Lightning repressed the urge to glare at her. After all, it was an accident and like it or not, she couldn’t hold that against her.
"It's alright. You're Clematis, right?", Lightning chose to say instead.
"Yes, I am", Clematis replied. Her eyes seemed to bore into hers, as though seeing everything that Lightning was and more. It made Lightning feel quite uncomfortable, though she refused to let it show. Now was the time to apologise, she decided.
"I wanted to apologise, for all the things I said the last time we spoke. It was an.... overreaction", Lightning hesitantly stated. It was hard to force these words out, because as much as she hated to admit it, there was a bit of truth in them.
"I- It's alright", the other filly stammered out. Lightning repressed the urge to roll her eyes. What a wimp.
She was curious about something, though. What exactly was Clematis doing wandering all on her own? She was supposed to be with Hurricane.
"What are you doing you doing here all alone?", she inquired, raising a brow. "Where is my brat of a brother?"
“We were having a race, but I got lost", Clematis replied. Typical Hurricane. Always selfish and self-centred.
"Just like Hurricane, inconsiderate and always expecting ponies to act and think the way he does", Lightning spat, before adding, "Where were you racing to? I'll show you the way, if you want me to."
She didn’t want to, really, but she remembered father’s warning clearly. She could be quite rebellious, she knew that very well, but she wanted this visit to go smoothly. She wasn’t going to be here long enough for any injuries to heal and her friends ie; followers at camp might question if she turned up with bruises.
"Nowhere in particular. Just exploring around the place.” That made her task slightly more challenging, but also meant that she would have more time before having to see that horrid brother of hers again.
She found Clematis observing the place. Probably imagining herself living here in the future. Gold-digger. She couldn’t help but voice out her distaste.
“Probably thinking you got the treat of a lifetime, aren't you? Getting to live in such a massive fortress.“
"I was thinking more along the lines of how I can't entirely blame you for being so unpleasant to be around; growing up in such a terrible environment likely had a hoof in it”, Clematis replied and Lightning was given a forceful reminder of why she disliked Clematis so much.
Still, father would probably kill her if he found out that Lightning had started another fight with Clematis, so she reluctantly offered another apology.
"I apologise", Lightning sighed, pursing her lips. "We'll be staying here together for a while, so we should try to at least be civil to each other", she added, hoping Clematis got the message and didn’t try to aggravate her further.
“I agree. Let's say, we have a truce", she extended her wing, to which Lightning responded by wrapping her own wing around the offered one and giving it a firm shake.
However, just then, Clematis’ face seemed to redden. Concerned, Lightning asked her if she was alright.
"You look red, perhaps you are ill. Come, I'll take you to the infirmary", Lightning offered.
"No, I feel fine. probably jut the heat getting to me or something", Clematis replied, sounding a bit choked off for some reason. The heat getting to her, what a weakling. It appeared that she had said that out loud, if the way Clematis’ eyes twitched was anything to go by.
"Truce, remember", she pointed out in that infuriating way of hers.
"Yes, yes, I know. Truce", Lightning replied and no, she absolutely didn’t sound like a whining foal.
Strangely enough, Clematis seemed to look amused for a brief moment before her admittedly beautiful features turned into a mournful, slightly wistful look. As though remembering something she wouldn’t be able to have again.
"Hey, what's gotten into you", Lightning couldn’t help but ask.
“Nothing”, Clematis quickly replied. Lightning repressed a snort at her obvious lie.
“You really need to work on your lying skills you know. It’s almost like you’ve never told a lie before”, Lightning pointed out.
“What’s the matter?”, she asked yet again.
Aren’t you being nosy”, Clematis said in reply, raising an eyebrow.
“Maybe, I don’t really care”, Lightning shrugged.
“I can tell”, Clematis snapped, to which Lightning shrugged again.
“So, what is bothering you so much?”, Lightning asked. Clematis should’ve realised that all this lying and defensiveness had only increased her curiosity. And now that Lightning was curious, she definitely wasn’t going to let this go.
The other filly seemed to realise it as well, because she finally relented and replied, “Well, I was just thinking about my parents.”
Her parents? Lightning wasn’t sure in which direction this conversation was going.
“Your parents?”, Lightning asked, urging her to continue.
“They died a few years ago. Phoenix Flu”, Clematis hurriedly said, probably wanting to get over this as soon as possible.
Oh. Perhaps she shouldn’t have pressed so much.
“I apologise for pressuring you into telling this to me. You have my most heartfelt condolences”, Lightning stated softly. It was the third time Lightning had apologised to Clematis and the first time she fully meant it.
“Thank you”, Clematis replied just as softly. There weren’t tears in her eyes but she looked so sorrowful. Lightning couldn’t help but wonder what it was like to love your parents enough to keep mourning their absence.
“Do you miss them”, Lightning asked, her curiosity too great for her to resist.
“Of course I do”, Clematis’ delicate features twisting into a frown. For the first time, when looking into those slightly luminescent yellow eyes, Lightning saw the very same shattered look she saw in the mirror every single day. She had misjudged Clematis is a lot, hadn’t she.
She wasn’t somepony to be bitter towards, but rather a kindred spirit of sorts, ponies whom those like Hurricane and Swift Flight would never understand.
“I wouldn’t, if I were in you shoes. I would’ve bidden my parents good riddance had they been in your parents place”, Lightning spat venomously.
Clematis seemed to recoil a bit and Lightning couldn’t really blame her, after all, she probably would do anything to have her parents back.
But Lightning desperately wanted her to understand, to know, for some reason.
“I’m sure your parents must have been good ponies who loved you a lot, but that isn’t the case with my parents. They have always preferred Hurricane and ignored my existence, just because I ‘m a filly, not a colt. And whenever I dare to speak against them….”, Lightning still remembered the feeling of her father’s hooves around her neck. She couldn’t help but rub her neck.
When Clematis look of horror and mild disgust was replaced by a more understanding look, Lightning felt oddly gratified, though she didn’t know why. Why she wanted Clematis approval so badly.
She could detect confusion in those bright eyes and guessed that Clematis was wondering why Lightning had told her all of this.
Replying to the unasked question, Lightning said, “ I pressurised you into revealing personal information. It’s only fair I reciprocate the gesture.
Besides, you’re like me. You’re broken too.”
The words seemed to add a weird tension to the air, yet, Lightning felt that she could stay this way for eternity, looking into those brilliant eyes, which seemed to resemble golden moons.
Lightning knew that something had changed, something was different, but she had no idea what.
He didn’t know but after Clematis had gotten lost during their race, her behaviour had become a little unusual. Lightning’s too, as a matter of fact.
Well, not too weird per se, other than the fact that they were now actually getting along with each other. Maybe even becoming friends. Embarrassingly, Hurricane just a twinge of jealousy at that.
Don’t get him wrong, he was glad that Lightning would probably not be rude to Clematis anymore, now that they were friends and that whenever Clematis, Lightning and he were in a room together, Lightning spent more time looking and talking to Clematis than sending hateful, disgusted looks at Hurricane.
However, Clematis was the first friend he’d had who wasn’t friends with him simply because of his popularity and Lightning always paid attention to him, even though said attention usually compromised of glaring and arguing.
But now, Clematis seemed to shoot these little looks at Lightning when Lightning was there, even when she was talking to me and Lightning preferred talking to Clematis over bickering with him. Also it stung that his best friend could get along with his sister while he couldn’t.
Was there something wrong with him, he, for once, couldn’t help but contemplate. Then he shook his head, banishing that awful and utterly strange thought. There wasn’t anything wrong with him, he was amazing.
No, there had to be something wrong with Lightning instead, he decided. After all, she was the one his parents didn’t like.
That was when he came across Clematis and Lightning talking. He dismissed it at first. They were probably talking about some filly stuff that no colt would have interest in knowing, when he heard Clematis say his name.
That certainly captured his attention. Quickly hiding behind a wall, he decided to eavesdrop. After all, if he was involved in this then he had a right to know.
“Yes, he couldn’t have controlled it, but he doesn’t have to keep flaunting it in my face. How well beloved he is, how our parents love him more than me. He’s utterly pathetic”, Lightning said coolly, composed and calm yet still being able to project her anger. On the other hoof, Clematis looked like she was going to spit fire with how angry she looked.
Hurricane couldn’t help but scowl. Pathetic, him? It was time to make his presence known.
“You know sister, if you want to insult me, then do it to my face”, he snapped.
Clematis' ears pricked and she turned around, her eyes narrowing, but she didn't greet him, simply watching their every move in an animalistic, hawk-like manner.
“Well, why not? How about I tell you exactly how I feel about you”, Lightning wasn’t yelling at all, but she didn’t seem to need to, to convey her fury.
Clematis made a move, most likely to get between them, but Lightning held her hoof up and commanded, “Stop. He asked for this himself”
Clematis nodded and flew further away from them, though her were trained on them like a hawk.
“You are lazy and spoiled, never having worked for anything in your life. Of course not, mother and father would never let their precious heir suffer by making him do any work.
You are one of the most arrogant, selfish, inconsiderate and self-centre’s ponies I have ever met, always flaunting everything you have, never once realising how it makes others feel, always taking and taking and never once trying to understand those around you.
And most of all, you are a colt, not a filly. The colt mother and father always wanted. If only you hadn’t been born, I would’ve been the heir. And even they’d had a child again, who might’ve been a colt, they would’ve had enough time to grow to love me too.
I would’ve been father’s pride, not his punching bag. I would’ve been my mother’s darling, instead of the embarrassment she can’t even bear to look at, at times.”
Hurricane finished listening to his sister’s rant. Well, if you could call words said coldly and so matter-of-factly a rant. Was that really why his parents favoured him over his sister, not because he was better, he was special, but because he was a boy?
No wonder Lightning always seemed to be so annoyed with him. Her gender wasn’t something she could control yet she had to endure criticism about it from the very ponies who were supposed to love her.
Bile rose up in his throat as he recalled how much he used to tease her about being the favourite when they were younger, before she started spending the holidays at the academy.
Wait, he recalled a part of her tirade. Father’s punchbag? What did she mean by that?
“Hold on a second, what exactly do you mean by father’s punching bag?”, Hurricane asked, dread pooling up in his stomach. He wasn’t sure whether he wanted to know the answer or not.
To his surprise, Lightning started laughing, throwing her head back. There was a mad gleam in her eyes and a dark edge to laughter that, to be honest, freaked him out.
“Sister”, he hesitantly said.
“You never did know, did you? Never noticed the bruises, the cuts? How I used to cower in fear whenever that stallion was around. You never noticed”, she gasped through her laughter. He could vaguely make out Clematis approaching them.
“You never noticed this”, she shoved her mane away, revealing a deep scar on the junction between her neck and shoulders, before bursting into another fit of laughter. By now, Hurricane was quite worried about his twin’s sanity and from the way Clematis seemed to frown and tense up, she could tell that she was too.
But, the fact that his father had raised his hand against his twin sister and had probably done so regularly, was even more disturbing than Lightning’s apparent insanity. His father wasn’t that kind of pony, was he?
His father had always been gentle and loving towards him, he was somepony Hurricane had always looked up to and idolised. To think that he was one of those ponies who were cruel and unloving…
“You have always been oblivious, haven’t you. But I can’t blame you, with how large your head is I doubt you can see anything beyond it”, Lightning panted, her cackling fading, as she gasped for breath.
Ok, this was taking things a little too far. Besides, while it may have been wrong for his parents to do what they, how was it his fault? He didn’t ask to be a boy. Lightning was simply taking out her frustration on him, which, in his opinion, was completely unfair.
“Ok, this is just not fair! Yes mother and father are wrong, yes they should love you too, but it isn’t my fault! You do realise that you’re blaming me for something that isn’t my fault, the same way mother and father blamed you.!”, he cried out.
He vaguely registered Clematis nodding her head in agreement and quietly stating that he was right, before sighing as she seemed to realise that nopony was paying attention to her and shrunk into the corner.
“I used to wonder what I did to deserve that kind of hatred from my own sister, my own twin sister. Now I know that I didn’t. Admit it, I didn’t deserve your loathing and cutting remarks.
But I was the easy target for your anger, wasn’t I? You couldn’t take your frustrations out on mother and father, so you went for the next best thing, me. For all you talk about being more composed and rational than me, about not losing yourself to your fury, deep down you are even more prone to anger than I am.
You’ve always let your grudges and anger rule your life. You are just good at hiding it with a façade, when you want to that is. I may be arrogant”, and oh that was hard to admit, but he continued on anyway, “but you are much more prideful than me. And there’s something you are that I’m not. A HYPOCRITE!”, he ended.
Both he and Lightning were breathless and puffing by now, exhausted from all the emotional outbursts and tirades, from all the revelations.
Clematis seemed to have picked up on the fact that they needed to be alone with each right now, for she had slipped off to who-knows-where.
“A hypocrite”, Lightning breathed out.
The silence that followed the whispered statement was discomforting. The tension in the air was thick enough to be cut with a knife.
Finally, Lightning broke the silence. “That’s what Clematis told me, but she didn’t call me a hypocrite outright.”, she tilted her head, her dark eyes seemed to be observing his every move.
“I’ve always blamed you for all my problems, haven’t I? I always felt that it was justified for me to do so. But I suppose you’re right. In the end, I picked the easy target for my frustrations. I never thought of how you couldn’t help being a colt the same way I couldn’t help being a filly.
I think I knew that on a subconscious level, which is why I was always so focused on finding faults within you and when I did, I latched onto them and used them as a way to defend my misplaced resentment”, she stated softly, her face expressionless and unreadable.
“You did, didn’t you? But I suppose I’m also to blame in a way. I’ve always vaunted how I was mother and father’s favourite child, never once thinking how hurt you might have felt because of it”, Hurricane admitted, sighing.
“It did. It did hurt, so very much”, Lightning looked into his eyes. Their eyes were so different, his a light cerulean while hers were purely black. But at the end of the day, despite all their differences, despite all the bitterness, they were twins. They had shared the same uterus for nine months.
“I’m sorry”, Hurricane stated. “For everything’s our parents did, our father did. For how I was indirectly responsible for your pain. For putting you down over something I had no real idea about.”
“I’m sorry too. For blaming you for something that wasn’t your fault, taking my anger out on you, I just… I’m sorry too”, she trailed off, letting out a breath.
“Truce”, Hurricane grinned his signature lopsided grin, which many fillies swooned at, and extended his wing.
“Truce”, Lightning agreed, shaking his wing firmly. Hurricane had a feeling that things were going to change and he didn’t mind it at all.
Lightning was definitely not in the mood for an argument at the moment. Well, she never was really, so when Clematis, glaring at her in a way that she hadn't know the kind pegasus to be capable of, pulled her aside and stated, "We need to talk, Lightning", she knew her day was ruined.
"What is it?", she demanded, knowing from the sigh the other pegasus let out that she wasn't going to like this one bit.
"It's about Hurricane", Clematis stated and that spark of irritation that always rose in her chest at the mention of her brother's name flared.
"I have no time, nor interest, to hear about my brother's exploits, Clematis. Leave me alone", Lightning coolly commanded, an order which Clematis, of course, refused to follow.
"Lightning, hear me out, please", Clematis pleaded and Lightning cursed her own weakness when she heavy-heartedly replied, "What is it?"
"It's just, well, the thing is.... You're being unfair!", she finally blurted out. Unfair? Unfair how? And to whom? When she vocalised these questions, Clematis cried out,
"To Hurricane, that's whom. You've been judging him, resenting him, all for something he had no control over", Clematis took a deep breath in, before continuing more calmly,
"Lightning... I'm tired of seeing my dearest friends fighting all the time, of you always putting him down. I understand your resentment, believe me I do. What your parents did and are doing to you is wrong, but you must realise that you're doing the same thing to Hurricane", Clematis finished.
Wait.... Did she just compare her to them, to her parents. To the father who laid a hoof on his own daughter and a mother who not only did nothing to stop it, but also encouraged it.
She knew that Clematis and Hurricane were close, too close for her liking as a matter of fact, but didn't she realise how horrible he was? The part he played in this? How he would always show off how he was loved and point out that she wasn't... True, he couldn't control what he was born as, but he could control his actions.
“Yes, he couldn’t have controlled it, but he doesn’t have to keep flaunting it in my face. How well beloved he is, how our parents love him more than me. He’s utterly pathetic”, she scoffed.
She could tell that Clematis was getting irritated and while that wouldn't have bothered her all that much had it been any other pony, Clematis was the first pony who'd ever understood her. Lightning decided to try to be less insulting when talking about Hurricane around her. The key word being try. But then...
“You know sister, if you want to insult me, then do it to my face”, she heard an unfortunately familiar voice call out.
Had he eavesdropped on their conversation? How dare he, doing something so utterly invasive and uncultured! Well, if he wanted to be insulted to his face, then Lightning would be more than willing to do so.
“Well, why not? How about I tell you exactly how I feel about you”, Lightning stated harshly and from the corner of her eye, noticed Clematis moving to get between them. That absolutely wouldn't do. Nopony was going to get between her and Hurricane today, not her mother, not her father and certainly not Clematis.
She held a hoof up, gesturing her to stop, a silent command which, to her satisfaction was obeyed. “Stop. He asked for this himself”, she added, just in case.
“You are lazy and spoiled, never having worked for anything in your life. Of course not, mother and father would never let their precious heir suffer by making him do any work.
You are one of the most arrogant, selfish, inconsiderate and self-centre’s ponies I have ever met, always flaunting everything you have, never once realising how it makes others feel, always taking and taking and never once trying to understand those around you", she stated, her rage, the formidable rage that came after the coldness was starting to surface, especially when she saw the look of offence on his face.
Hurricane had no right to be offended, not after he had stolen everything that should have been Lightning's. There parents' love, pride, the heirship to the family, birthday gifts and now, even Clematis, if the way she had been defending Hurricane earlier was anything to go by. It wasn't fair! It just wasn't fair!
She continued on, her breath stuttering, but her voice steady as ever, "And most of all, you are a colt, not a filly. The colt mother and father always wanted. If only you hadn’t been born, I would’ve been the heir. And even they’d had a child again, who might’ve been a colt, they would’ve had enough time to grow to love me too.
I would’ve been father’s pride, not his punching bag. I would’ve been my mother’s darling, instead of the embarrassment she can’t even bear to look at, at times.”
Lightning sucked in a breath, all too aware of all the sensations in her body, of every sound around her, of the tension between them and the moments of silence that followed the rant.
Then, Hurricane broke the silence, asking, “Hold on a second, what exactly do you mean by father’s punching bag?”, but from the wide-eyed look on his face, she could tell that he had an idea, an idea he didn't want to accept.
After everything that had happened to Lightning, all because of Hurricane, he stood before her and had the audacity to ask what she meant? To ask what had happened. But he did, he didn't know, curious, naive, egoistical little thing.
Lightning didn't remembered what she had thought of in those few precious little moments, but she hadn't been able to control the laughter that erupted from her mouth, harsh even to her own ears. Her heart wanted to cry out, wanted her to cry out, but she couldn't, her tears on the matter had long since dried out. So she laughed instead, she laughed and laughed and couldn't stop it, even if she tried.
She could tell that her two companions were terrified and internally questioning her sanity, but why should she care?
“Sister”, Hurricane hestitantly called out. Sister, SISTER! Had they ever really been siblings?
“You never did know, did you? Never noticed the bruises, the cuts? How I used to cower in fear whenever that stallion was around. You never noticed”, she gasped through her laughter.
“You never noticed this”, she shoved her mane away, revealing a deep scar on the junction between her neck and shoulders, before bursting into another fit of laughter. She remembered how she'd gotten it. Hurricane had been crying at an event, because, well, she didn't remember why, but she had shouted at him for it in public.
It had gotten father dearest upset. After all, how could she have the audacity to humiliate his precious heir in public. He had pushed her against a table, where a knife had somehow dug into her skin Oh how hilarious, how wonderful! ANother shriek of laughter left her mouth at the thought,
“You have always been oblivious, haven’t you. But I can’t blame you, with how large your head is I doubt you can see anything beyond it”, Lightning panted, her mad laughter finally dying down and she had to gasp for breath in order to speak coherently.
Then, Hurricane replied, “Ok, this is just not fair! Yes mother and father are wrong, yes they should love you too, but it isn’t my fault! You do realise that you’re blaming me for something that isn’t my fault, the same way mother and father blamed you.!”, he cried out.
Not fair? Hadn't it been not fair when Lightning had to hide in her own house, cowering in the cupboards with fear? Hadn't it been not fair when she had begged her mother for help and had only received a cold shoulder in reply. Hadn't it been not fair when Lightning had had to fear her own father?
Yet, she had endured it all, never whining and complaining to others. Hurricane had no right to victimise himself in this situation, to feign innocence as he was doing.
“I used to wonder what I did to deserve that kind of hatred from my own sister, my own twin sister. Now I know that I didn’t. Admit it, I didn’t deserve your loathing and cutting remarks.
But I was the easy target for your anger, wasn’t I? You couldn’t take your frustrations out on mother and father, so you went for the next best thing, me. For all you talk about being more composed and rational than me, about not losing yourself to your fury, deep down you are even more prone to anger than I am."
You’ve always let your grudges and anger rule your life. You are just good at hiding it with a façade, when you want to that is. I may be arrogant”, and oh that was hard to admit, but he continued on anyway, “but you are much more prideful than me. And there’s something you are that I’m not. A HYPOCRITE!”, he ended.
No she wasn't. She was better in that regard than him. She was the one who was always in control of her temper, she was the one who didn't rub every small achievement into everypony else's faces. And she didn't take out her frustrations out on him because he was the easy target. He deserved it. He deserved everything she dished out on him.... didn't he?
Yet, a small, rather annoying part of her whispered in her head, 'Don't we? How has he ever directly wronged us. He teased us, yes, and some of his comment hit all the sore spots and insecurities in our heart, in our being, but we were always worse. Admit it, we are worse. We are a hypocrite, you are a hypocrite.
Hypocrite, hypocrite, hypocrite', suddenly there was a choir of voices chanting. She wanted it to stop, how could she make it stop. Her head hurt, with all the emotions brought to the surface, all these truths she had to accept.
With each passing moment the chanting in her head grew stronger, until it stopped. In its place, a voice echoed, "Face your flaws, little one. Tis your own guilty conscience that had been screaming in your head before I came." Okay, that voice definitely did not belong to her. What was it doing in her head? Was this some sort of mind magic?
She tried to banish it, only for it to giggle softly. "Do not worry, I mean no harm. I will not say I am your friend, for I am not. I am something more, beyond what you'll be able to comprehend right now. Follow me and I shalt make sure to steer you right.
Face your flaws", her voice echoed, before Lightning felt her presence thankfully dissipate from her mind.
The voice had told her to face her flaws, but at the end of the day, Lightning had never been able to do say. She wondered if it had been because of pride or cowardice. Perhaps a mixture of both.
But she had to, hadn't she? She had to face them, her flaws and fears both. But she where to start? How to start?
“A hypocrite”, she finally breathed out.
The silence that followed the whispered statement was discomforting. The tension in the air was thick enough to be cut with a knife.
She finally understood what Clematis had been trying to tell her. She had always blamed Hurricane for something he had no power over, just as her parents had blamed her for something she couldn't control either. But she had never seen it that way, always presenting what had happened to her as terrible, which it was, but she had always ignonre that she herself did the same to Hurricane, albeit on a much smaller scale.
And for the very first time, she acknowledged that there had been another force that had led to her acting towards him the way she did.
Jealousy.
Hurricane had everything she had ever needed and desired, and in such large amounts that he could afford to take it all for granted. She had admitted to resentment and even anger before, but it was the first time she had ever acknowleged or even known about the jealousy.
Lightning had never been the best at figuring out emotions and jealousy was so wrapped up under all the hatred, bitterness and rage, that it had been hard to separate from the others.
She looked at Hurricane. Their appearances were different, obviously, after all, they weren't identical twins. But, the amount of similarities she could see now that her eyes had been freed from that blindfold of bitterness were astonishing, to the point where she wondered if she had ever even properly looked at him before.
They had the same sleek, flyer's build, the same gravity defying, black manes. They had the same long, graceful necks and they carried themselves in a nearly identical manner, brimming with enough confidence to make everypony oround them back off and their eyes glinted in the same, dark, wild manner.
She wondered if they could've actually been siblings in another life, if they could've loved each other. What would it have been like, to have somepony she could confidently declare as family.
Time kept ticking on, but neither was willing to speak, to interrupt the powerful silence between them. At least until Lightning decided to speak up.
“That’s what Clematis told me, but she didn’t call me a hypocrite outright.”, she tilted her head, scrutinising his face, trying to get a read on his emotions. She could make out impatience, anger and sorrow. Was he mourning the relationship they could've had, just as she was
“I’ve always blamed you for all my problems, haven’t I? I always felt that it was justified for me to do so. But I suppose you’re right. In the end, I picked the easy target for my frustrations. I never thought of how you couldn’t help being a colt the same way I couldn’t help being a filly.
I think I knew that on a subconscious level, which is why I was always so focused on finding faults within you and when I did, I latched onto them and used them as a way to defend my misplaced resentment”, she stated softly, because that had been exactly what she had done.
“You did, didn’t you? But I suppose I’m also to blame in a way. I’ve always vaunted how I was mother and father’s favourite child, never once thinking how hurt you might have felt because of it”, Hurricane admitted, sighing.
“It did. It did hurt, so very much”, Lightning looked into his eyes, finally letting her guard down after so long. What did she have to hide, now though? She had revealed almost everything today, spilled the entirety of her heart out.
“I’m sorry”, Hurricane stated. “For everything’s our parents did, our father did. For how I was indirectly responsible for your pain. For putting you down over something I had no real idea about.”
“I’m sorry too. For blaming you for something that wasn’t your fault, taking my anger out on you, I just… I’m sorry too”, she trailed off, letting out a breath.
“Truce”, Hurricane grinned lopsidedly,
“Truce”, Lightning agreed, shaking his wing firmly.
Admitting to all of this, expressing her emotions and resentment, accepting her faults, apologising and being apologised to, revealing her pain, finally making up with her twin... It felt as though a burden had been lifted of her shoulders, a burden that had been there far longer than it should have been.
Something in the air had changed and Lightning simply knew that it was only a start. Things were going to change soon and she had a feeling that it would all be for the better.
