Chapter 22
Seeing Shining Armor provoked too many warring emotions for Rainbow Dash to properly identify them all. She wanted to take comfort in the fact that he sounded like himself, unlike the Shadowbolts. Hope briefly flared. Maybe he could still be reasoned with, maybe there was still enough of him that he could be reached and—
Even before the thought was fully formed, Rainbow recognized the folly of it. There was no way he'd be here, at this place and time, and not be totally under Nightmare Moon's power. Indeed, the marks of it were all too clear to see. His coat and mane colors were dulled and darkened, almost merging into his darkened armor, but the biggest change was the nasty leer that adorned his face and a hard glint in his eyes.
Rainbow realized with mounting dread that if Nightmare Moon had let Shining Armor retain more of himself, it was only so it would hurt all the more if you could almost see the pony he had used to be.
But Twilight hadn't been through the same experience Rainbow had when she tried to reach out to the Shadowbolts. She stepped forward, her eyes wide but her tone hopeful. “Shining Armor?”
He shrugged. “Queen Nightmare made me something much greater.” Crackling black magical energy raced up his horn, arcing forth and encircling the group. “When you meet her, she'll do the same for all of you.” The energy coalesced into semi-transparent orbs, trapping them each within their own separate sphere.
Twilight pounded her hoof against it without any effect. “No! Shining! This isn't like you!”
“That's kinda the problem Twi, that isn't him right now!” Rainbow grimaced, unsure if this was better or worse than the non-recognition she'd gotten from Derpy and the others. She soon got her answer when he wandered over and stopped in front of her container.
“Oh, but it is.” He leaned forward. “When Queen Nightmare transformed me, she opened my eyes and finally allowed me to unlock my full potential. She could help you do the same. Far better than Celestia the false queen ever could.”
Rainbow hurled herself at the edge of the shield, but she had no more success than Twilight had. He hadn’t even backed up. "Don't you talk that way about Celestia!”
Shining Armor chuckled. “How little things have changed. Tell me, what did Celestia the Usurper ever do to help you? Give you lessons you never actually learned anything useful from? Force you to interact with the worst of Canterlot society and get upset with you when you got tired of all their horseapples? Oh, and do tell me how much she did to help you pull off another sonic rainboom…”
Rainbow punched the shield between them, less because she actually expected it to accomplish anything and more because it simply made her feel better. “You—you're not gonna fool me. You're not Shining Armor, so nothing you say matters!”
“Stop it!” Twilight exclaimed from next to them, wincing and clearly uncomfortable at raising her voice to her brother—or likely anypony.
Armor ignored her, still focused on Rainbow Dash. “The truth is the truth: Celestia betrayed you, just like she betrayed her own sister. Renounce the false queen, and accept Nightmare Moon as the true and rightful ruler of Equestria.”
Rainbow’s only response was a long, ripe raspberry.
His eyes narrowed. “You always were short-sighted. So blind to everything that doesn't fit with your narrow-minded view of the world. But I suppose you would never understand. After all, you couldn't even grasp that the stallion you had a crush on wasn't interested in you.”
There was a thudding noise in Rainbow’s ears that she took a moment to realize was the sound of her own heart and of the blood rushing through her veins. She found herself short of breath. “Y-you shut up.” She found herself leaning against the orb’s side. “That was a long time ago and ... y-you're not Shiny.” She dropped her voice, speaking more to herself than anypony else. “He's not Shiny.” She thought she’d gotten over her crush ages ago—but hearing not-Shining casually grind her fillyself’s heart into the ground still hurt.
“Rainbow…” Twilight reached out a hoof, trying to comfort her, only to be blocked by the sphere.
Fluttershy whispered softly from her place next to Dash’s sphere. “Don’t listen to him, Rainbow. You know that’s not Shining Armor.”
She took a breath, trying to steady herself. “I-I know that.” She closed her eyes. “I know that. He’s just trying to mess with my head. He isn't really Shining.” Clinging to that thought, Rainbow tried not to even think of him as Shining Armor, but something else. But knowing it wasn't really Shining in control only helped so much.
The pony she'd taken to thinking of as Darkened Armor snorted. “I come to you as herald to the rightful Queen of Equestria and you’re still trying to make it all about you. Though that kind of behavior is pretty normal for Celestia's laziest, stupidest, most impatient and incompetent student. It's no surprise you couldn't manage the rainboom.” He shook his head. “But if you want to talk about it more, then fine. You silly pony, did you think I didn't know? At first I thought it was cute and a little flattering. But now? I suppose I would laugh, if it wasn't so pathetic.” He paused, tilting his head slightly. “Oh, what the hay.” Then he started to laugh.
Rainbow’s companions reacted with outrage. “You brute!” Rarity spat. “How dare you?!”
“Y’all leave her alone!” Applejack snarled, bucking at the sphere. “Dash, that ain’t yer friend! And when I get outta here I’m gonna buck the evil clear outta his hide!”
Twilight’s eye twitched. “That’s enough. I said that’s enough!” Her horn lit up with a bright burst that shattered Darkened Armor’s magical spheres. Seven equines landed hard on their hooves. Rainbow buckled and fell to her knees.
“Rainbow Dash!” Applejack and Fluttershy knelt down on either side of her. “You okay sugarcube?” Rainbow’s sides shuddered as she fought to keep her composure.
Twilight meanwhile was rapidly losing hers. “I don’t know who you are but you are not my brother!” Her breath came out in puffs as her horn started to shimmer. She positioned herself between Armor and the others, blocking his path. “I’m not going to let you treat my friends like that, much less do it in my brother’s voice!”
Darkened Armor was unimpressed. “What will you do, turn me into a cactus?” Shadowy whisps emerged from his horn, conjuring into a misty-looking, yet somehow still solid, sword and shield. “I think you need to learn a lesson about respecting your big brother.”
“You aren’t my brother!” Twilight’s horn began to glow brighter and brighter. “Don’t make me use this.”
“I’m petrified.” Darkened Armor deadpanned as a ball of magic grew out of the tip of his horn. “Or have you forgotten that I always was the better spellcaster.” With an elaborate twirl of his head, he sent the crackling magical blast towards the group.
“That’s right…” Twilight agreed, standing firm and tilting her horn into the blast’s path. Rainbow Dash scrambled to her hooves, intent on knocking Twilight out of the way. Before she could even cross the distance to where she was standing, Twilight had already grabbed the incoming magic and held it in place with her own. She closed her eyes and after a brief moment’s concentration, she dissipated it. “You were.”
Darkened Armor snorted and adjusted his stance.
Rainbow had been around him long enough to recognize it: he was gathering more magic. She winced. She’d only seen Armor cut loose once or twice on the practice field, and that had been more than enough to let her know how bad this was.
"Foolish little Twiley. Always playing with forces you can't control."
Rainbow soon became aware of a faint hum in the air that made her feathers twitch and her fur ripple. Everypony could sense that something was building up. The answer came all too soon as dark storm clouds coalesced, swirling above Darkened Armor. Before she could make any move to help Twilight, she was again preempted, this time by torrential winds that buffeted the group.
“Everypony hold on!” Applejack yelled as she dug in her hooves, standing windward of Fluttershy and Rarity, shielding them. Zecora had done the same for Pinkie Pie, digging her staff into the ground to help her stay upright. Applejack glanced at Rainbow Dash as she experimentally opened her wings to test the wind. “Don’t you even think about it. In this wind you’re more likely to get blown all the way to Vanhoover than do anything helpful!”
Rainbow grunted, already having concluded that herself. “I can’t just sit here and do nothing!”
“Can you do magic?” Applejack demanded bluntly. “If not, then you best stay out of the way of this! Granny Smith always said to never get in the middle of a magic duel!”
“She always says that?” Rainbow regarded her. “Seriously?”
“Consarnit, you know what I mean!”
Any further debate was interrupted when Darkened Armor reared himself up, causing lightning to arc down to his horn. From there he hurled it straight at Twilight, who had been busy just trying to stay upright in the fierce gale. Rainbow saw Twilight’s eyes widen as the lightning barreled down on her. Reacting faster than she thought Twilight was capable of, she lifted a chunk of earth out of the ground with her magic and held it in front of her like a shield. The lightning slammed into it, bursting it apart and peppering everyone with warm bits of sizzling dirt. Twilight was muddied, but otherwise unharmed.
Unfortunately, Rainbow saw that Darkened Armor hadn’t waited to see if his strike was successful; he was already on the move. Twilight again adopted a defensive stance, forming her own magical sphere around herself. Armor charged forward and swung his shadowy-sword, easily cutting through it. Twilight had to teleport away to give herself some distance before she found herself completely helpless. She fired a bolt of magic, but Darkened Armor easily batted it away with his shield once more. "Pathetic. You don't deserve to have magic!”
Twilight’s sides heaved and Rainbow could see her trembling. Was it just nerves, adrenaline, or was she already tapped out? She got her answer when Twilight cut loose with a bolt of magic that curved around and struck Darkened Armor in the side, staggering him. She immediately followed it up with a spell that caused the earth around Armor’s hooves to crack. Twirling roots ensnared him by the ankles, pinning him in place, at least for the moment. Twilight took advantage of it to rain down raw, kinetic force on his shield, pounding away until it shattered and dissolved.
Darkened Armor blinked, but rallied with a snarl. His shadowy blade cut through the roots, setting them ablaze and withering them to nothing. “Better, but as usual, nowhere close to good enough!” He leaped forward and slashed the ground with his sword. A black fire swept the grass before him with crackling, entropic flames that completely encircled Twilight, to Rainbow’s horror. "Careful now, don't you know what happens to fillies who play with fire? But then, that's basically what you've been doing with every spell you cast, now hasn't it?"
Twilight jumped back from the ring of fire, even as it began to close around her. Rainbow could see her trembling, but she soon hit upon a solution. With her horn raised as high as she could make it, Twilight used her magic to transform the black clouds overhead. They began to pulse with white and purple light, dumping rain down on the encroaching fire. It must have been magic too, Rainbow realized, as it put the fire out with astonishing quickness.
Armor narrowed his eyes. His horn flashed, accompanied by a thunderous clap of noise as his magic tore the ground apart and hurled the dislodged chunks her way. Twilight let out a yelp and teleported away. Twilight must have rushed it, for the tips of her mane and tail were singed when she reappeared.
Darkened Armor noticed this too. “Can't take the heat? Let me cool you off!” He gathered all the water Twilight had summoned for her last spell, conjuring a great tendril of water the size of a tatzlwurm. With serpent-like speed and grace, it coiled around Twilight and enveloped her utterly. Frantic bubbles escaped from Twilight’s throat. Before she could swim to an edge, Armor froze the entire water-tentacle over.
The sight of Twilight’s panicked-expression, frozen in clear ice speared Rainbow like a lance. “Twilight!”
Darkened Armor shook his head and chuckled, turning to her. “You see, Dashie? This is what happens to silly little fillies who think they—” A sharp crack stopped him mid-sentence. He whirled around to see the ice shudder and crack, bubbles forming all around Twilight. Before Rainbow could even pierce together what was happening, the entire edifice shattered.
Twilight, still wreathed in a magical fire, fell to the ground, gasping for breath. She hastily used her fire to not just melt the remaining ice shards, but boiled it into an obscuring mist that shielded her from Armor’s view. Rainbow could see him stomp in annoyance as his head twisted this way and that, unable to spot her. He snarled with rage and proceeded to stomp the ground with his hoof. A shockwave burst out, clearing the mist as it expanded outwards.
That was when Rainbow saw Twilight again; trying to circle around and approach Armor from his blindside. But now she was completely caught out in the open. Her horn lit up as she began preparations for a new spell.
Darkened Armor sneered. "Do you know how ashamed our parents are of you?"
Twilight momentarily froze, her spell dissipating.
Armor summoned a writhing, black tendril of half-corporeal magic that lurched out at her, trying again to grab her. Twilight hastily raised a wall of earth to encase her, but it was all too easily smashed through, sending her sprawling into the nearby bushes.
Rainbow Dash charged forward, but before she could even close half the distance between them, she found herself held in place by Armor’s magic. When the others moved to assist her, they found themselves in the same position. Not even deigning to look behind him, Darkened Armor chuckled as he sauntered over to Twilight. “Aww, Twiley—you know, after that big boast of yours I was actually expecting something more. But no, you’re still the same old Twilight: timid. Weak. Pathetic.” He stopped to loom over her, allowing the dark magic in his horn to simmer and spark ominously. “I told you, I always won these little magical tests of strength. Now with Queen Nightmare’s power, I’m even more powerful.” He smirked. “I’m surprised a pony as smart as you didn’t know that.”
“Actually—” Twilight winced as she sat up. “I haven’t been giving my all in this fight. I’ve been busy.”
“Is that the best excuse you got?” He snorted. “I’ve heard better ones from Rainbow Dash when she’s asked about her homework.”
Twilight was unfazed. “I was studying your magic. You see, Shining Armor’s abilities are based on defensive magic, like his specialty with shields. Unlike you, my brother doesn’t want to hurt anypony, but protect the ponies he cares about.” She gave the pony towering over her a severe look. “But that’s not how Nightmare Moon thinks. That’s why she had to give you new powers and a new personality, one that’s far more offensive—and I mean that in every way possible.” She gave a small snort. “However, that’s all based on her dark magic.”
Darkened Armor rolled his eyes. “Ugh, you’re giving a lecture now? That’s you all over, Twiley. It’s why you never amounted to anything: all talk, no action and scared of your own abilities. All you ever did was sit in your room and study.”
“That’s right, I did.” Twilight nodded. “And you know what I learned? Dark magic has its own weaknesses. The most obvious, of course, is light magic.”
“Way to state the obvious, sis.” He gestured broadly at the moonlit sky. “Let me return the favor: the biggest source of light magic is the sun and that’s gone, so that’s no help to you. So all you’re doing is boring me to death. Which, to be honest, is the closest thing you’ve done to damage so far.”
Twilight nodded, and only now did Rainbow manage to spot the dim, almost imperceptible glow of her horn, one that was shared by the plants and trees around her. “Yes, the sun is gone,” Twilight said agreeably. “But the thing is? Someone earlier tonight showed me a very interesting trick regarding plants, their ability to store solar energy—and how to use it!” Her horn shone with a bright golden light, energy streaming in from the surrounding plants.
Now having spotted the danger, Armor swung his shadow-sword down. It was met by a jet of bright light from Twilight’s horn and completely dissolved by it. The beam met no resistance as it struck Darkened Armor squarely in the chest with enough force to fling him backwards halfway across the clearing. Rainbow Dash and the others stumbled, his hold on them broken. She flew over to where she’d seen Armor get flung.
Armor had landed roughly, gasping as he patted his chest. His guard armor was cracking and falling off in pieces. Twilight teleported over to him. Her horn was crackling with white and golden sparks and she fairly pulsed with energy. Twilight looked to Rainbow Dash and for a brief second, Rainbow saw all of Twilight’s fears and worries etched on her face: afraid of losing control, of being swallowed up by her own magic. Rainbow stretched out a wing and softly murmured, “Hey. You got this.” Twilight nodded, smiling gratefully before turning back to her corrupted brother.
“Y-you think this changes anything?!” Armor groaned as he climbed back to his hooves. “I am Captain of the Royal Guard, first to the Usurper and now to the True Queen. I am the most powerful unicorn in all of Equestria! You cannot defeat me!” A dark stream of energy spewed from his horn only to be met halfway by a lavender stream from Twilight’s own as the two magical titans clashed. The dark stallion took a step forward, forcing Twilight back. Her hooves dug furrows in the ground as she resisted with all her might. “You might as well give up now like you always do.”
“You’re not Shining Armor!” Twilight grunted. Her knees wobbled as she fought to stand tall. “And for your information about all our old matches—” she stood tall, her eyes sparkling with magic. “I always held back!” Her magic stream redoubled in power, this time forcing Darkened Armor on the defensive and pushing him back.
Even under the strain, Armor remained formidable. He tried to disrupt Twilight’s concentration with another burst of black fire but Twilight dispelled it with a glowing white mist. Outstretched shadowy claws lunged towards her but were dissipated by a shimmering shield. Slowly but surely, Twilight was gaining the upper hoof.
Rainbow Dash looked on in amazement. She had seen a lot of amazing things be pulled off by the students at Celestia’s School for Gifted Unicorns. She didn’t know much about magic or the theories behind it, but she had picked up enough to know that the sheer amount of magic Twilight and Armor were casually tossing around was nothing short of incredible. More than that: Shining Armor was the most powerful unicorn she knew, the Captain of the feathering Royal Guard, and Twilight was outclassing him. She could scarcely recognize her as the meek pony who had earlier been intimidated by faulty scheduling and birds.
Darkened Armor must've seen it too for he tried even harder to disrupt her focus. "You're going to hurt your new friends with your magic! You can't control that much power—you'll lose control just like always!"
But Twilight strode forth, weaving even more complex spells as she swatted aside Darkened Armor’s own, snorting at the thing wearing her brother’s body. “Ever since I was a little filly, I thought my magic was like some monster living inside me, something I had to control or else it would hurt somepony.” She planted her hoof down, crunching the dirt beneath her. “I was always, always afraid of losing control. But then my … my friends helped me realize that my magic wasn’t a monster—that I wasn’t a monster. But you are.”
Darkened Armor grunted and strained as Twilight marched towards him. “I didn’t need to be afraid, and I don’t need to hold back when it comes to the likes of you!” Twilight’s eyes began to glow white, her magical stream turning the same color, interspersed with flecks of gold from the solar energy she’d absorbed. Now her magic was steadily pushing back against Darkened Armor’s. Her magic traveled through his and back to his horn, causing feedback that blew him off his hooves and into a tree.
The stunned minion of darkness picked himself off the ground and looked up at Twilight Sparkle with a cross of awe and fear. She strode towards him with purpose. The downed stallion fired off several bursts of energy that pinged harmlessly off Twilight’s shields or were brushed aside with casual ease. The ground reached up and swallowed his hooves, pinning him in place. “Y-you can’t do this to me!” he panted, eyes wide in fear. “I’m your brother!”
“No you’re not!” Twilight shouted as she stood over him. Her horn lit up and she looked at him like she had just solved a complex equation. “You’re just a—a piece of Nightmare Moon’s essence that she overlayed on top of you. You aren’t my Shining Armor. And I.” Her horn flashed, pulsing with more energy than ever before. “Want.” She stomped her hoof. “Him.” Her face was twisted in a snarl as her eyes narrowed, still burning with white magic. “Back!”
Her magic washed over Darkened Armor like a tidal wave. He let out an unearthly wail as bits of him looked as if they were starting to sizzle. Blackened bits writhed and melted away, rising into the air to vanish like evaporating steam. Armor gulped noisily before vomiting up a mass of black shadows in a display that made Rainbow’s own stomach want to heave in sympathy.
Twilight meanwhile pressed herself closer and closer, the effects growing more dramatic as she drew nearer. Soon the tip of her horn gently tapped her brother’s. A bright white light flashed, tinting Twilight’s lavender magic pure white. Like a layer of paint, Twilight’s magic stripped the darkness inhabiting Shining Armor off. Bit by bit, his white coat and striped blue mane was revealed. His gold-rimmed light purple armor reasserted itself as his dark, nightmarish one shifted.
Then with one last concentrated burst Twilight stripped the last of the darkness that stubbornly clung to her brother away and separated it from him. She quickly stuck the black ichor into a shield and poured more magic into it. There was a burst of light that forced everypony’s eyes closed. When they opened them again, they saw Shining Armor woozily swaying on his hooves. His eyes—once amber yellow—were back to their normal blues. “H-hey Twiley.” He smiled weakly right before his eyes rolled up and he fell on his side, unconscious.
Twilight's eyes stop glowing and she blinked a few times. “Shining! I-I think I ... Oh dear…” She stumbled in place.
“Shining Armor! Twilight!” Rainbow Dash broke free and rushed over to them. “Are you okay? Is he—?”
She saw that Twilight was breathing heavily, her coat covered with sweat and dirt in a way that would likely make Rarity faint, but Twilight was still smiling. “Y-yeah, I think so. Surprisingly so. I mean, I'm pretty beat, and, um, beat up. But I'm good. It's not weird to say that I'm feeling pretty good right now despite all that?” She tried to take a step forward but swayed suddenly. “W-whoa—we’re both fine!” She started to grin in a wide, Pinkie-like manner that gave Rainbow pause. “I did it, didn't I? I really did it. I didn't lose control, and I got to help everypony, and ... Whoo, okay, try and not to move too quickly, the world spun on me there for a second!” Rainbow wasn’t surprised. Twilight’s eyes were doing their best impression of Derpy.
Rainbow Dash looked skeptically at Twilight. “Um, are you sure you’re okay?” She tilted her head to try to look Twilight in the eyes.
“Heeyup! Whoo—sorry!” She smiled goofily. “Just a bit of a magical high … haven’t really cut loose like that in a looong time! Kinda felt good!” She hugged herself. “Shining Armor is just exhausted, he’ll be fine. And back to normal too.”
Rainbow Dash sighed in relief. “That’s great to hear.” She started to say something about how incredibly epicly amazing her magic was, but even those words seemed inadequate. There was an awkward silence as they waited for the others to join them.
“Would you believe … we never had … a single fight?" Twilight half-panted, half-giggled.
Rainbow Dash thought about it. “No.”
“Y-yeah, me neither.” Twilight giggled, still coming down from her magic rush. “Funny thing. Shining and my parents encouraged me to talk to counselors and therapists. T-they said I was pretty buttoned up and had issues with repression.”
“Ahuh.” Rainbow nodded, not really sure what else to say. “And?”
“I guess I’m not s-so repressed anymore!” Twilight burst out into a fresh round of giggles.
"A good thing too." Rainbow hip-bumped her. "For the record? It's always better to give it your all than to go through life limiting yourself." She glanced up at the sky. "I don't like limits. Don't believe in 'em."
"Everypony has limits," Twilight pointed out.
Rainbow shook her head. "I don't think so. I think ponies can always get better; can always be better. Once you start accepting you have limits—then it's all over: you'll never get any better. Because when you hit a wall you can always tell yourself 'that's it, I hit my limit' and not try to push through. That's not just for flying or for magic, that goes for anything. If you accept that you've reached a limit, then you've peaked and it's all downwind from there. I don't accept that."
She gently poked Twilight in the chest with her hoof. “Before all this went down, Shining Armor reminded me about an old pegasus saying, better to aim for the heavens because even if you miss you'll land among the stars.” Rainbow shook her wings out. “The other side of that is that it’s better to come up short in the stars than hit the ceiling and not rise any higher than that. You just saved our rumps because you stopped holding yourself back."
"I suppose I did." Twilight looked down at her hooves, which had finally stopped swaying.
Rainbow gave her one last steadying pat. "You handled that awesomely. You didn't need me or Shining Armor or some dumb teachers telling you how far to go or when to stop. You knew what you were doing. Just trust yourself and you'll be fine. You'll always have me and Shining and everypony else backing you up anyway."
Twilight nudged her. “You know … that thing controlling Shining Armor? It was lying. He—"
“I know.” Dash’s shoulders sank. “I know.”
But Twilight didn’t stop. “Shining Armor really does care about you, for you. I told you how much he talked about you at home, about how brave and confident and amazing you are." She gave Rainbow a neck hug, resting her neck across Rainbow’s own. “I guess he figured we would make a good team.”
Rainbow looked up as the rest of the group as they hurried over to join them. “Yeah,” she murmured, half to herself. “I guess we do.” Seeing everypony’s joyous expressions made her feel better than she had since Pinkie’s song in the swamp. But there was one face that wasn’t happy. “Hey Z, what’s up? We just won a big one!”
“A victory this is I would not deny,” Zecora granted. “But exchanging strong magics is easy to scry.”
Twilight jolted her head up. “Oh my gosh, she’s right! If Shining Armor was connected to Nightmare Moon, she would’ve probably felt her spell being undone. Not to mention the powers of the spells we were using...”
“I get it, she knows where we are.” Rainbow rubbed her face and looked over at the ruined castle, hanging so close. “Maybe we could still beat her there if...” She groaned. “No, wait, don’t even bother saying anything, I know: she can teleport herself like Celestia could, right?”
As if in answer, there was a burst of light from the castle.
“Well, horseapples.”
“Don’t supposing anypony’s got a plan?” Applejack asked.
Zecora nodded. “This is the purpose of mine for which I was prepared. I shall go to the throne room, the heart of the Nightmare’s lair. There I’ll draw attention away from the rest of you so you can find the Elements of Harmony and do what you need to do.”
Rainbow snorted “Oh come on! You want to face Nightmare Moon by yourself? How come when I said that you told me I was nuts but now it’s okay for you to try it?”
“I never said my plan was completely sound,” she admitted. “But of our options, this is the best around. Stopping Nightmare Moon is not honestly my goal. I’ll divert her gaze while you take your secret stroll. In the old tower you’ll find the gems we seek, and you must make haste without a single peep!” She raised her hood and turned away. “All of Equestria is at stake—you must succeed, whatever it takes!”
Rainbow Dash shook her head. “But—”
Zecora stopped and gently placed her hoof over Rainbow’s mouth. “This, sadly, is how it must be. Now please, one last time: trust in me.”
Rainbow looked Zecora in her almond-shaped, sky blue eyes and knew there was no more yield in the zebra than in herself. She sighed, dipping her head in surrender. The zebra smiled. “I must go and have no more time in which to talk. May Celestia protect you where you must walk.”
She turned and galloped away, heading straight for the ancient palace. Behind her six ponies watched her until she was out of sight.
“What do we do now?” Twilight Sparkle whispered, more to herself than anypony in particular.
Rainbow Dash took a step forward, facing away from the others. Everypony turned and waited. The only thing they saw a small sparkle as starlight refracted off a bit of moisture that fell from her muzzle. Then she straightened herself up and turned around. Grim determination was etched on her brow. “I have an idea.”
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While stylistically I'm not a fan of calling a charater "XY the YX" anywhere outside an introduction using a definite article in front of a person's name seems just wrong.
9857301
Fixed!
Oh boy.
One of Joker's best moments.
Ohoho!
Oh she is PISSED.
Knowledge is power, Darkened. As you're about to learn.
Nice!
And just like that, you've sealed your own defeat.
Ah, I do love me a good World Of Cardboard SPeech.
I think you're magically exhausted and it's making you loopy.
Or high on magic. That works too.
Yup.
Famous last words.
I love it when Twilight cuts loose. You did a great job describing the magic duel.
That was awesome. The light magic from the plants shattering the dark is moving of course but, even more, seeing Twilight come back into comfort with her magic and really show us what she can do.
"she hoped it would that much more" seems to have accidentally a word.
Maybe "hurt"?
Well...that was awesome. Good job, Twiley! So all that remains is to test Rainbow's Loyalty.
Great to see Shiny saved and Twilight cutting loose like that. looks like we're approaching the climax!
REALLY good job on this latest chapter. LOVED the work that went into the exchanges, characterizations, action and future chapter set-up in all the right places. And, yeah, given how much juice Twi has when she cuts loose, it IS a good thing that she holds back most of the time, but it's even better when she encounters something powerful enough AND nasty enough where she doesn't have to. And, yeah, now Darkened Armor is defeated and we are getting close (not there yet, but getting close) to the final showdown with Nightmare Moon herself.
Definitely going to be looking forward to more of this.
The original and here too, I really wish you’d gone with something like “Tarnished Armor.” But oh well; you can’t please everyone all the time, and I still liked it.
'World of cardboard' much?
Nice chapter, but I found a couple minor typos you may want to edit.
"glowing".
And you're missing the quotation mark after the question mark.
9859640
Thanks!
¿Porque no los dos?
Also for some reason I now have "Masters of the Galaxy" in my head with Darkened Armor playing the part of Gransmaster Proletheus. The shadowbolts are the Death Knights of Crail. Which would make Nightmare Moon the evil lord Zargothrax.
No but seriously go listen to that song, it's ridiculous.
Insert commentary about Shining Armor's accomplishments, or lack thereof, in the canon show and how that wouldn't be very hard. Man, Shining Armor and Cadance kind of got screwed by the series.
I wouldn't taunt her with that, she can do it and she knows it's a reversible condition.
And now I'm reminded of Sunset Shimmer is MAD About Everything.
“Yeah…” Fluttershy agreed. “Erm… I’m sorry Applejack, but I think your flank is the safest and biggest object to hide behind right now.”
Applejack scrunched up her nose and lips in annoyance. “Ah’m mildly offended by that comment.”
We all knew that she may be a Ponyta.
You know, if using a lot of magic at a time can give a unicorn a high, then that goes a long way towards explaining Starlight Glimmer.
Hm… How does Rainbow know this, though? Shining Armor has barely spoken a word to her since he was turned, and her interactions with the rest of the Shadowbolts have been limited as well. This might be the knowledge of the author creeping in.
Arcing, I think.
True to canon, given Shining Armor’s talent for shields, protective bubbles, and such.
I’m not sure how I feel about giving Shining Armor a different name for this section of the story. It’s a little tropey, for lack of a better word. Along the lines of something you might see in a shonen anime or a pulpy sci-fi novel. (Although, at the same time, Friendship is Magic isn’t too far afield from stuff like that.)
It’s also dehumanizing. Rather like when Anakin renounced his name and became Darth Vader; “more machine now than man, twisted and evil.” In the context of Star Wars, that rather made sense for Luke, who had never known his father. But Shining Armor is still alive in living memory for Rainbow Dash. For her to start calling him something else communicates to me, the reader, that on a subtle psychological level, Rainbow has already severed her concept of who Shining Armor is/was from the entity that’s currently standing in front of her.
I understand Rainbow Dash is a mare of action, so perhaps it stands to reason that she would make this jump faster than some other characters. But at the same time, Shining Armor is someone important to her, and someone she probably wouldn’t want to be in a rush to let go of. He’s also one of the last remnants of the life she used to know in Canterlot. Psychologically speaking, it seems like this would be a pretty difficult bond to sever—especially in the context of where Rainbow is right now, having recently suffered the loss of Queen Celestia.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hrWNWqujpBI
As in other chapters, the dialogue here needs to be broken up into paragraphs.
Armor ignored her, still focused on Rainbow Dash. “The truth is the truth: Celestia betrayed you, just like she betrayed her own sister. Renounce the false queen, and accept Nightmare Moon as the true and rightful ruler of Equestria.”
Rainbow’s only response was a long, ripe raspberry. Darkened Armor’s eyes narrowed.
“You always were short-sighted. So blind to everything that doesn't fit with your narrow-minded view of the world. But I suppose you would never understand. After all, you couldn't even grasp that the stallion you had a crush on wasn't interested in you.”
I like that Rainbow’s feelings for Shining Armor are being brought into it, but I wonder if this might be even more emotionally poignant if Rainbow hadn’t already separated Darkened Armor from Shining Armor in her head.
This is just food for thought. Basically, I’m imagining this scene from a slightly different angle. What if Rainbow didn’t immediately logick out that the entity in front of her =/= Shining Armor? What if she had a harder time letting go? What if her drive, her determination, her grief over Celestia, and her savior complex all combined to make her want to redeem Shining Armor here, rather than defeat him and hurry on with the mission? She talks to him, appeals to him, pleads with him. But all he does is hurl abuse her way, which only brings her lower.
Of course, redeeming him turns out to be impossible, and it ends with a fight. The key is, Rainbow doesn’t immediately come into the situation understanding that Shining Armor is gone; rather, during the course of the scene, she has to come to that realization. She has to learn how to let go. This, in turn, leads her to greater character development.
Just a random idea I had. Not really a suggestion, as I don’t know how well it would fit into the rest of the story. I’m just always looking for nooks and crannies in the narrative where some more character development could be squeezed in.
If I’m honest, the earlier action scene with Rainbow leading the Shadowbolts on a chase was a bit boring to me, because there wasn’t a character conflict or an emotional struggle undergirding it. That isn’t the case here. Not only do we have Rainbow Dash suffering under Shining Armor’s slings and arrows, we also have the culmination of Twilight’s character arc, with her willingly turning her magic against this doppelganger to help her new friends. It’s a twofold character struggle that makes this confrontation all the more enjoyable.
Suggest an Oxford comma here.
https://youtu.be/JQ2yh0bo550?t=8894
This duel is very creative. I give you props for coming up with all this back-and-forth spellcasting. It takes a lot of imagination, and that isn’t easy.
However, I think there’s a problem that’s starting to develop here. I can tell there’s a problem because I’m starting to become bored.
By this point, the fight has gone on for almost 1,000 words, and it’s 1,000 words of just characters using spells on each other. A fight scene becomes uninteresting if there isn’t dynamic interaction between the characters to go along with it. This scene started out high with Twilight finally facing her demons, but it’s starting to run out of gas.
For comparison, I looked at the magic duel between Dumbledore and Voldemort from the end of Order of the Phoenix. In the first 1,000 words of that fight:
This is pretty similar to the action that’s going on between Twilight and Shining Armor. But here’s the crucial difference. At the same time all the action is going on:
The point I’m trying to make is, I think the duel between Twilight and Shining Armor could be more interesting if there were something more going on between these characters than just them casting spells at each other. Perhaps, as Shining Armor is assaulting Twilight with magic, he’s also assaulting her with words, constantly reminding her what a failure she is, how dangerous and untrustworthy she is with magic, harkening back to her disaster at the entrance exam, telling her it would be better if she had been born without a horn, or better still if she had never been born at all. Every time one of his verbal attacks slips past her defenses, that’s when she slips up a spell, and Shining Armor gets the upper hand in the duel.
Thus, it’s not just a battle of magic, it’s also a battle of Twilight trying to overcome her inner darkness, to make peace with the regrets she’s allowed to define her all her life. This, I think, might work better than Shining Armor just making lame quips like “Feeling the burn?” or “Too basic.” It’s not just the battle that’s interesting, it’s the character struggle that’s interesting.
A problem I have with this is that all of Shining Armor’s verbal jousting comes down to “Look at me, see how strong I am and how weak you are.” It’s hinting at the notion that Twilight Sparkle has always felt overshadowed by Shining Armor, which is something that’s never been raised or developed in the story. What’s more, Twilight has never wanted power. Quite the opposite, she’s always been afraid of power, afraid that power might cause her to hurt people. That makes Shining Armor’s verbal attacks utterly ineffective. These punches were never going to land.
If Shining Armor really wanted to get under Twilight’s skin, he would be reminding her of the entrance exam, goading her not to let her magic go haywire, reminding her that her friends are right there, so she’d better not slip up and accidentally hurt someone. Maybe he would even snatch up Rarity or Applejack from the sidelines and levitate them right in the line of fire of one of Twilight’s spells, and she only barely diverts it in time. That would paralyze her.
Basically, this confrontation could be a lot more desperate, but Shining Armor is kind of being an idiot. Twilight could be faced with a lot more adversity and self-reckoning. Because Shining Armor lets her off easy, it takes the luster off her accomplishment somewhat, in the same way climbing Wimpy Mountain is less of a crowning achievement than climbing Everest. Still an enjoyable scene and fun to read, but I think this character moment could have been even more monumental for Twilight.
The fact that Twilight’s making puns might undercut the drama a bit.
Bulbasaur, use solar beam! (I don’t remember when Twilight was shown a trick about plants and solar energy, but I’m probably just forgetting.)
Yes, this is the culmination of Twilight’s arc, her learning that she isn’t a monster and neither is her magic.
https://youtu.be/z95fi3uazYA?t=535
Shonen anime!
Blinked.
It’s.
Never a good sign!
A fun chapter, looking forward to the conclusion.
10733040
Thanks!!! Yeah, this was so HARD for me to do. I'm not an action scene writer and had to more-or-less RP this scene with some friends and fellow writers who are. And once it got going it was easy to continue the elemental theme I inadvertedly started (water, fire, earth, air, etc.)
To answer the first comment: the very first thing Armor said to her, at the end of the last chapter, was a greeting to her specifically with all his usual mannerisms. She had repeated exchanges with the Shadowbolts, all of whom refused to even acknowledge their old identities and finished each other's sentences--not even being able to fully function apart from the others. It's not hard to discern right off that this isn't the case with Shining Armor.
There's something to what you say about Darkened Armor being de'humanizing' ... but the flipside of that is this is a way to separate out that this isn't -really- Shining Armor saying and doing these terrible things; not really Shining needs to be defeated and stopped. To use your analogy, there's a reason why Obi-Wan treated Anakin and Darth Vader like they were two different beings because, for him, they were. Anakin was his apprentice and friend; Vader was the child-killing, murderous Sith who he had to slay (unsuccessfully). I feel like his "certain point of view" stuff was his attempt to try to insulate all the positive memories and feelings he had for Anakin from what he had to do with Vader. Likewise here, calling him Darkened Armor protects Rainbow's memory of Shining by divorcing it from the being before her. It doesn't totally work because you can't just shut off your feelings for another (indeed Obi-Wan couldn't really do it either, at least in Episode III), but it's an attempt for her to recognize and make the distinction between the Shining she knew and the thrall of Nightmare Moon before her.
As for Rainbow making more an effort to convince him--well, the "I know it's still you in there" thing gets pretty old pretty fast and she already went through this, more than once, with the Shadowbolts. Having her do so again now just makes her look like she can't ever learn no matter how many times it's hammered into her head. And since this is Twilight's brother and her first encounter with him, it makes more sense for Twi to be more receptive to reaching out whereas Dash has been down this road already with the Shadowbolts. This chapter is already pretty long and is meant to focus on Twilight, so I don't want to pad it out with more with Dash making yet another overture to another thrall of Nightmare Moon when it's been made clear to her already that this isn't something she can exhort them to just snap out of.
The stuff about Armor baiting Twi is good and I'll try to think more about what to have him say and how to actually integrate that.
Thanks!