• Published 25th Jul 2018
  • 6,057 Views, 557 Comments

Rainbooms and Royalty (New) - Trinary



Rainbow Dash's first Sonic Rainboom garnered her plenty of attention—including from Celestia, who made Rainbow her student! A re-imagining of the events "Friendship is Magic" (New version!)

  • ...
5
 557
 6,057

Chapter 30

Dear Celestia,

So I have no idea how to even start this. Why am I writing a letter when I just saw you yesterday? Because I want to do things differently than how I used to. I almost let Fluttershy drift out of my life. I won’t let that happen again. Not ever.

I’m settling in pretty well. I decided to finally get out of AJ’s mane and get my own place. Well, mostly. It’s gonna take a little bit to put my cloud house together. You know me, I’m not doing anything that isn’t all-out awesome! Until then, I’m staying with Derpy and her kids. Nothing against Applejack, but staying was just making things weird. Not for her and me, but I swear that brother of hers turned even redder whenever he has to deal with a mare he isn’t related to—which just made sharing a bathroom awkward.

I guess I understand why you told me that I needed to get a job and not just live off a royal stipend or whatever while I’m in Ponyville. Of course I’m already going to continue my studies with you through the mail, train for the Wonderbolts AND be on stand-by for any World Saving emergencies, but I think I can handle it. I’m pretty awesome, after all.

At least, I was able to do some good while I was getting my new job...


Derpy’s eyes lit up when she saw Rainbow at her door. “Come on in!”

“Hey Derpy, hey Dinks.” She smiled breezily as she stepped in.

“Hmm hmmbuh mss!” Dinky said around a mouthful of breakfast, waving happily before reaching for a glass of milk.

Derpy smiled. “Care to join us?” Rainbow nodded and sat down. “What brings you by?” she asked as she shut the door.

Rainbow smiled enigmatically. “Turns out I’m gonna be staying in town for a bit longer than expected. Celestia’s cool with me living in Ponyville.”

“Yaay!” Dinky cheered. “You’re staying, you’re staying!”

“That’s great news Rainbow!” Derpy grinned.

“Yeah, and I got some more great news!” Rainbow beamed. “Derpy? You’re fired.”

“Hoora—wait, what?!” The poor mare was thunderstruck, both by the news and the cheerful way her friend delivered it.

Rainbow winked. “Yep! I’m going to be the new chief weathermare for Ponyville.” Derpy’s face fell. Rainbow smiled cherubically and shrugged. “Oh well. I guess the only thing left for you to do will be your mailmare stuff … oh and your new position in the weather office.”

The poor mare looked even more confused than she normally did, blinking in puzzlement. “M-my new position? In the weather office?” Rainbow could see the gears turning in her head as she realized that this was actually a step up.

“Oh yeah.” Dash shrugged nonchalantly. “They need somepony to be in charge of the paperwork: requisition forms, weather reports. Pretty boring if you ask me, but I guess that’s why it pays better than simply pushing a cloud around all day.”

“It … it does.” Derpy nodded numbly.

“Yeah, like what? Two, maybe three times as much?” Rainbow tapped a hoof against her chin. “Sounds about right to me. As long as the paperwork gets done you can practically make your own hours.” She pretended not to notice the way Derpy’s jaw dropped. “Normally you’d still be out in the field, but I think we can swing it that I can cover most of your field work—more training for me—without it cutting into your own paycheck. That is, if you think you’d be interesOOF!” The air was forced from her lungs by the impassioned, rib-crushing embrace of Derpy.

“Thank you thank you thank you!” She wrapped Rainbow Dash up in a mammoth hug that threatened to smother the younger pegasus. Dinky meanwhile had leaped from her seat at the table and landed on her mother’s back, adding to the pile with a giggle. Rainbow Dash smiled, but groaned under the weight. If this sort of thing kept up, it’d totally ruin her reputation and her spinal column. Oh well.


I think out of all my new friends, Applejack’s the one I feel the most comfortable with. I always know where I stand with her and after everything I went through in Canterlot that means a lot to me. We’re not always going to see eye to eye, but at least I’ll know where she’s coming from.

Before leaving the farm, I did help AJ out with one small thing...


“So, you’re really doing this?” From her position on the high branches, Rainbow looked out over the row of trees in the process of being planted alongside both banks of the Everfree River.

“It’s what I said, ain’t it?” Applejack grunted as she pushed another one upwards. “I told them seaponies I’d fix things and that’s what I’m doing.”

Rainbow looked up and down the bank where dozens of trees laid on their side, waiting to be hauled up into holes that had been dug for them. “Yeah, I got that, but we only ripped up the trees from that one stretch of the bank. You’re adding way more trees than were here before. Plus,” she circled around, plucking an apple off one branch, “I’m pretty sure those riparian trees or whatever weren’t apple trees.”

“Heh, she spends a few days sleeping on my farm and she thinks she’s an expert on trees,” Applejack chortled. “Yeah, no, they weren’t.” She patted the trunk of the apple tree she just planted fondly. “I figured I’d leave something for the seaponies to snack on while they’re passing through.”

Rainbow gave her a look. “Are you sure you’re not just a glutton for punishment? You’d probably be more than halfway done by now if you just stuck to doing what you were supposed to. Or let your family help!” She gestured back towards the farm. “You have more cousins than I have feathers just sitting around at your farmhouse. Even if each of them only planted one tree, you’d be done in ten minutes flat.”

“I guess.” Applejack made her way over to the next tree, fanning herself with her own hat. “But my family ain’t the ones who made this here mess. I did. Ain’t fair to drag them into cleaning up after me.”

“A huh.” Rainbow lowered herself down besides her. “And what if I said I wanted to help out? After all, I did knock down more trees than you!”

Applejack rolled her eyes. “You can keep telling yourself that but it don’t matter none. It was still my idea and my promise, not yours. You’ve got enough on your plate: settling in, building a new house—shoot, you’ve probably got a couple of foals in your Fan Club who’ve only heard how you saved Equestria twice. You go on and enjoy yourself. You earned it.”

“True.” Rainbow made her way over to the next tree and started hauling it up. “Doesn't mean I can’t do all that stuff after I help a friend out. Unless,” she added with a smirk. “You’re that afraid I’ll plant more apple trees than you.”

“Oh you are just asking for it now, aren’t you sugarcube?” Applejack warned, but she was smiling. “Thanks.”

“Any time. Come on, I bet I can buck more apples off than you can!”

“Yer on!”


I thought that the start of any friendship was a common interest in something. If you didn’t have that, then how could you ever be friends with somepony? It’s true that a lot of friendships, maybe even most of them, start over a shared interest or something. But not always. Sometimes the best friends you can make are the ones who are totally different from you. You never know what getting a new perspective can lead to; maybe you even end up seeing things in a whole new light.


Rainbow Dash knocked on a door.

Coming! Welcome to—oh hello Rainbow!” Rarity smiled as she opened it. “What brings you to my humble boutique?”

Rainbow sighed. There’s no way this wasn’t going to be awkward. “Hey Rarity. I got to thinking about everything you’ve done for me and, well, I wanted to find some way to say thanks.”

“Darling, there’s no need for that! But if you really wanted to go with me to the spa again, I—”

“That’s not quite what I meant.” She winced. “See, when I went to help Applejack with the trees in the Everfree, I went back to the Twinkle-Eyed ponies to get your gem back from the Diamond Dogs.”

“Rainbow, darling, you didn’t!” Rarity huffed, looking faintly appalled. “A lady does not simply renege on her word—especially when it comes to a token of affection she’s given!”

Rainbow protested, “Yeah, but you didn’t really want to give it to them! They forced us to pay them to let us by!”

“It would hardly be considered generous if I gave away something I wanted to get rid of.” Rarity shook her head. “What matters is that the Diamond Dogs did keep their word and they showed up to offer us their support against Nightmare Moon when they didn’t have to. While I may have been compelled by circumstances, sometimes the act is more important than the motivation. It clearly made an impact on them and I don’t want to undo that.”

“Yeah,” Rainbow sighed. “I can get that. But I still wanted to do something so.” She slowly held up a silver necklace, a small empty pendant showing where the gem once sat. “Turns out it was just the gem they cared about, not silver or the like, go figure. So I thought even if you don’t have the whole thing back, it’s got to be better than nothing, right?” Her voice faltered when Rarity began to sniffle. “Rarity?”

Rarity surged forward, wrapping her forelegs around Rainbow’s neck. “Thank you! Oh, this is so thoughtful!” She clutched the necklace to herself with her magic. “I-I hadn’t even considered...”

“Well, we were kinda pressed for time and none of us were exactly thinking clearly,” Rainbow admitted. “Including some of the stuff I thought about you. Can you forgivURK!”

“You never need to have asked,” Rarity half-sobbed right in Rainbow’s ear as she hugged her tightly. “Thank you!” Rainbow awkwardly patted her back, trying not to react to Rarity’s way too-loud crying. She suspected Rarity might have been hamming it up a bit for her own sake.

After a moment she shrugged and hugged her back. “So if you really wanted, maybe we could go to the spa again sometime this week. That sound okay?”

Rainbow almost drowned under Rarity’s joyful tears, but she was still smiling regardless.


I guess the thing about differences is that you never know how somepony can make one. Wait, that isn’t the same kind of difference, is it? There are lots of ways to make one, or be awesomely inspiring. Sometimes it’s doing something incredibly mind-blowing that everypony thought was impossible (like a Sonic Rainboom, just for instance). Other times it’s one pony rising above their fears and stepping out of their comfort zone while still being themselves. I used to think the first one was the only way to be awesome. Now I know better.


There were bat ponies roosting in Fluttershy’s rafters. Without batting an eye (ha!), Rainbow looked for the mare herself. She found her cutting up tomatoes and placing them in a salad. “Hey Fluttershy. Got some new roomies?”

“Rainbow Dash, hello!” Fluttershy stopped her mixing. “I was trying to help them find someplace new to stay that’s closer to other ponies, but still provides them with lots of cool weather and shade. I’ve been asking my owl and bat friends for advice.”

“Look at you.” Rainbow reached over and mussed her mane. “I guess if Equestria ever needs someone to bridge over a millennium of fear and suspicion they’ll know to call Fluttershy from now on.”

Fluttershy’s face turned the same color as her tomatoes and she ducked down, hiding behind her mane. “It’s nothing special, really.”

“Except it totally is.” Rainbow fell back on Fluttershy’s couch, ignoring the angry rabbit that she’d almost squashed. “What you did out there, with the bat ponies? That was special.”

“It’s hardly a Sonic Rainboom, after all,” Fluttershy demurred. “Only you can do that. Anypony could’ve done what I did.”

Rainbow nodded. “You’re right about the first part. The second part, not so much. Yeah, physically anypony can do what you did but that doesn’t mean just anypony would.” She leaned forward, jabbing a hoof forward almost accusingly. “If you weren’t there when we met the bat ponies, it’d still be dark outside.”

“But—”

“No buts. Now park yours and listen to me.” Rainbow waited for Fluttershy to meekly sit down before continuing. “When I thought about the kind of ponies I wanted backing me up on an dangerous adventure to face mortal peril and ultimate evil, yeah, you weren’t what I had in mind.” Fluttershy sank down, as if falling between the sofa cushions. The rabbit glared at Rainbow but she ignored him. “I was afraid that you’d get hurt, that it’d be too much for you to handle.” She exhaled slowly. “I was wrong. I literally couldn’t have done it without you and everypony else. Congrats Shy, you’re a hero.” She smirked a bit at the pink flush that overtook Fluttershy’s cheeks. “And the best part? You did it your way, not by doing it my way.” Rainbow leaned forward. “If I had brought some other pony along and left you behind, we’d never have gotten through the bat ponies. You did that by being you.”

Fluttershy’s squirmed, though whether it was from discomfort or if she was trying to unwedge herself from the couch wasn’t clear. “I know. I feel so silly now. I suppose I thought that if I tried to be a bit more like a brave pony—more like you—then you’d visit me more.” Her wings flittered. “I didn’t have many pony friends before: it was just you and Cloud Kicker and Ditzy Doo. When we were all together, you were so excited for your big adventure and your plans for the three of you. I suppose I felt a little left out. Not that I blame you!” She hastened to add upon seeing Rainbow’s guilty look. “You’re right, I’m not really an adventurous pony. But I didn’t want to risk losing you as friends.”

Rainbow groaned and facehooved. “Wow. Don’t I feel like the biggest heel ever.”

“No, you shouldn’t think that!” Fluttershy finally freed herself from the cushions and went over to hug Rainbow. “You’re brave and loyal and a true friend. I should’ve just told you how I was feeling. So don’t feel bad.” Rainbow looked unconvinced. “Besides,” Fluttershy added in a whisper, “we both know the biggest heel ever is my brother.”

Hearing Fluttershy casting shade was enough to startle Rainbow into outright laughter. “Heh, I can’t argue with that! But I’m still sorry if you were feeling left out. Even if I didn’t want to drag you into danger, that never meant that I was going to stop being your friend—even if I was a being a plot-head and forgot to write. You didn’t have anything to prove to me.”

“Thank you.” Fluttershy ducked her head, idly brushing her mane out of her face. “It was certainly, um, interesting to go on an adventure.”

“Still not your cup of tea though, is it?” Rainbow asked. Fluttershy’s awkward silence spoke volumes. “I mean, it’s no big deal if it isn’t. You’re allowed to like different things than me. I mean, for pony’s sake, if I can be friends with Rarity then you certainly don’t have to go all Daring Do in order to stay friends with me.”

“I know and … thank you.” Fluttershy steadied herself with a breath. “But part of being friends is sometimes trying new things your friends like. And, well, I suppose I did have an idea for our next adventure.”

Rainbow blinked. A delighted grin stretched from ear to ear as she leaned forward. “No way! What’ve you got?”

Fluttershy nodded eagerly, rushing over to her credenza and fishing out a pamphlet. “There’s a new butterfly garden over in Fillydelphia opening next month!”

Rainbow fought to hold her smile in place. She shrugged. Foal-steps and trying new things, after all. “Sounds like fun.”


Speaking of surprising me, nopony does that more than Pinkie Pie. I don’t just mean because of her habit of popping out of nowhere, firing off party cannons and making more noise than an entire circus. Ponies like her make such a big first impression that it’s hard to ever see past that to notice anything else about her. I thought all there was to her was parties, having fun and being silly. But like there’s a lot more to her than that, real hidden depths stuff, you know? I got even more proof of that right before writing this. I don’t know if anypony ever’ll plumb all the depths of Pinkie Pie—but I’m certainly willing to give it a try, no matter how long it takes.


Sugarcube Corner was mostly empty of ponies since the Cakes were outside with tables laden with their baked goods. But when Rainbow Dash went in, there was still one pony present: a familiar pink whirlwind. Pinkie rushed about from the oven to the table to a checklist she hastily scribbled on and back again. All around her were balloons, streamers, party favors and banners in various stages of completion. “Uh, Pinkie? Got a sec?”

“Oh I’ve got a lot of those!” Pinkie replied as she pried open the oven and took out a tray of cupcakes. “The Pies were always really long-lived! Why, my Nanny Pie can still cut loose and tear up the dance floor even though the last time I tried putting one candle for all her birthdays on a cake, I had to make it the size of the dinner table and almost burned the house down!” Pinkie tapped her hoof against her muzzle. “Maybe next time I’ll get cake decorations with numbers instead.”

“Right,” Rainbow said in lieu of anything else. “Uh, I was going to—what was I going to say?”

Pinkie leaned forward until Rainbow had to back up slightly. “You were going to say how great a friend I am, how much I helped when you all got stuck in the Swamp of Despair and how you’re going to book me as your official party planner for your next hundred birthdays and any and all other anniversaries, birthaversaries, bat marevahs, promotions, victories and attendant celebratory events?” Her poofy tail waggled hopefully and she grinned without even a semblance of shame.

“That’s not—I mean, you’re not wrong but…” Rainbow struggled for a second then gave up. “Oh, what the hay. Yeah, you’re my totally awesome friend and party planner forever.”

“Woohoo!” Pinkie leapt up onto a counter, all four hooves coming down right on several frosting tubes. The frosting lanced up into the air and every bit landed with impeccable precision on the freshly baked cupcakes, giving each one a perfectly shaped swirl. It was, of course, completely ridiculous and impossible. Rainbow didn’t even know why she was surprised. “Now that that’s done, let’s step into my office!”

“Your wha—?” Pinkie pulled back a decorative banister end and a trapdoor opened up beneath Rainbow’s hooves. “Oh come oooooooon!” She was rocketed down a slide that brought her far below Sugarcube Corner, depositing her in a pile of giant bean bags at the bottom. A delighted ‘wheeee!’ announced Pinkie Pie’s own descent, which came so suddenly Rainbow didn’t even have time to pull herself out of the bean bags before Pinkie came down right on top of her. “Seriously?!”

Pinkie giggled and hopped off. “Aww, sorry, I just couldn’t help myself!”

Rainbow Dash sat up, about to give Pinkie a piece of her mind when she spotted her surroundings. Balloons and streamers dotted the cavernous ceiling while gift-filled shelves and filing cabinets filled up the room. “What is all this?” Spotting an open cabinet, she snatched a folder and glanced through it. It was for somepony named Lyra Heartstrings and it listed her birthday, significant anniversaries, the kind of parties she liked, allergies and dietary issues, favorite flavors, favorite colors and a sticky-note that read ‘see also: Bon Bon.’

“You have a secret party planning cave?!” She looked up at Pinkie. “This is so cool!”

“Aww, shucks.” Pinkie beamed. “It’s just part of the party experience! Sure it’s a lot of work, but if it makes somepony else happy, then it’s all worth it.”

Rainbow couldn’t very well argue with that. “You’re something else, Pinkie.”

“Well, duh!” Pinkie giggled. “If I wasn’t then that’d mean I was you and you’d be talking to yourself and that’d raise a whole lotta questions. Ooh, speaking of questions!” She snatched a clipboard and a fresh folder. “Where do you stand on the important issues of the day? Chocolate, vanilla or strawberry? Cupcakes or muffins? Also, how do you feel about piñatas in the shape of your head? Someponies like them but others feel like it’s a little disturbing to want to smack open your own head? Also—”

Rainbow knew she wasn’t going anywhere for quite a while. But even as Pinkie babbled like a brook, she found herself smiling.


Twilight Sparkle is one of the most amazing ponies I've ever met. Part of that is her crazy magical strength, but what's way more impressive is how much she was willing to step up. Even though she was already more powerful than any other unicorn out there, she never believed in herself or trusted herself to make the right call about how to use it. She wanted to either hide away or let somepony else to tell her what to do: like her parents, her teachers, even Shining. But when Nightmare Moon took that all away, she finally had to make the call for herself and she totally nailed it!

In a way, she kinda proved what I always thought: that confidence is the most important thing a pony can have. Without that you can't do anything, even if you are the strongest unicorn in the world. The problem with eggheads really smart ponies like her is that they're way too introspective. They think about a million-billion possible ways they can mess up and paralyze themselves. When you're flying, you need to be able to make snap-responses to sudden changes, operate on instinct. If you waste time thinking about reacting instead of just acting, you're probably going to crash and take others down with you.

But I realize that I'm not going to be flying at Rainboom speeds for every single moment of my life. There were several times during our journey where I made mistakes by rushing ahead, ones I could've seen and avoided. Maybe even saved us some time if I did things differently. I really get why Shining Armor wanted the two of us to meet. I think we kinda complement each other. Not in the 'saying how awesome the other is' kind of way (even though we totally are) but how we balance each other out. I'm not saying I'm gonna start consulting checklists or anything, but I think I'm going to be better off having a friend like Twilight than flying solo. If that means having to stop short every now and again, well, I think it'll be worth it.


Rainbow Dash had spent a lot of time in trees: sitting in them, watching pranks go off from them, napping in them, occasionally crashing into them—but this had to be a new one for her. “So, they made a tree into a library.” She looked around. “Oookay. Any particular reason? Is it because paper is made from trees? Otherwise, I don’t get it.”

“I don’t think there’s anything to really get, it’s just what the town wanted to do.” Twilight pulled another stack of books off her couch. “There, you can sit down now! Sorry about the wait. I don’t usually get a lot of company.”

“I got that.” Rainbow gave the dusty couch a look and decided to stay standing while Twilight sat down on a chair. “So this is where you’ve been keeping yourself since moving to Ponyville?”

Twilight nodded, casting her gaze around. “It suited me. Or at least, I thought it did.” She idly started shelving some books with her magic without even looking. “I thought if I read enough and studied hard enough I could find the answers to, well, everything.” She bit her lip. “I thought I could find something to—to fix whatever was wrong with me.” She took a shuddering breath. “But there wasn’t anything to fix. You and the others helped show me that. I-I can’t thank you all enough.”

“Glad to hear it.” Rainbow looked around. “So, what’re you going to do now?”

“I’m thinking it’s time the town had a proper library again, not my own personal study nook.” Twilight looked around. “I’m going to clean the place up, you, um, might have noticed the dust—” Rainbow settled for whistling innocently. Twilight rolled her eyes. “—I’ll take that as a yes. I’ll clean things up, reorganize things so my research projects aren’t lying around everywhere and maybe even post regular storytimes for foals.” She chuckled. “You know, maybe get them to stop thinking of me as the Creepy Library Mare.”

Rainbow snickered. “Sounds good to me, but there is one thing I wanted to show you first.” She reached into her saddlebag and pulled out a thick scroll. “I talked with Celestia and she agreed to give you some personal magic tutoring from her.” She tried but failed to hide her smile at the gobsmacked look on Twilight’s face. “What with me and Shining telling her about your awesomeness last night, it wasn’t exactly a hard sell.” She leaned in. “Between you, me and the books, I think she’s going to do some housekeeping of her own at her School for Gifted Unicorns. Some of those EEA-types really need to go, y’know? Anyways, she’s going to work up some correspondence-lessons once or twice a month and see how things go from there. Pretty cool, right Twi?” Rainbow’s face fell a bit when she saw Twilight begin to tremble, tears forming in her eyes. “T-Twilight? Oh geeze, please tell me I didn’t screw up—”

“T-this is … wonderful!” Twilight choked out in between sobs. “I-I don’t, I can’t even—thank you Rainbow Dash!” With a burst of speed even Rainbow admired, Twilight shot up from her seat and hit her with a flying-tackle-hug that Pinkie Pie might’ve envied. “Thank you!”

“Wel-come...” Rainbow wheezed from the floor getting teary-eyed herself, though in her case it was a combination of the dust kicked up and the lack of oxygen. “Twi—air? Air!

Just as blackness started to form on the edges of her vision, Twilight let Rainbow go. “Oh, oh sorry!” She sniffled and climbed off her. “I just got a little excited. Sorry.” She magicked over a tissue and blew her nose. “Let me help you with all the dust on you, the dust from the floor there, um…” she looked to her used tissue and started to float it towards Rainbow, who quickly backed up. “Oh, right that’s not a good idea, is it?”

“Twilight, relax.” Rainbow shook her head and dusted herself off with her wings. “It’s all good. I think I’ll leave you to your geeking out in peace. Bet you’re pretty eager to start on that scroll, huh?”

Twilight floated the scroll over to herself and nodded, biting her lip as she skimmed the contents. “You’re right, I am.” She slowly exhaled. “But it can wait.” She rolled it back up and sat it down neatly on her desk, to Rainbow’s surprise. “It’s a little stuffy in here. That scroll isn’t going anywhere, so how about if you and I go find our friends and have some lunch?” A small smile crossed her face. “I understand Pinkie Pie is looking to throw you ‘Welcome to Ponyville to Stay’ party?”

“Yeah.” Rainbow nodded a little numbly. “She is.”

“...Think she can make it a double-party?” Twilight asked, squaring her shoulders. “I never did let her throw me a party when I moved in.”

Rainbow pretended to think about it, the effect ruined by how much she was grinning. “You know what? I think Pinkie will probably be okay with that. You might have a form or two to help her fill out later, but somehow I don’t think you’ll mind all that much...”


I’m going to end it here since Pinkie Pie is almost done loading all her party cannons. The blast’s about to begin and you know they can’t start it without ME!

Thank you again for everything. If you, or Equestria, ever need me, you’ll know where I’ll be.

Awesomely your student forever,

Rainbow Dash

The End

Comments ( 36 )

So, All-Pony Unification Era when?

Huh, so this means that Rainbow's eventually going to get the alicorn gig? That sounds like a hoot...

EXCELLENT job on this final chapter. Love the work that went into the exchanges, characterizations, general wrap-up and future story set-up in all the right places. I especially loved Rainbow's details as she was going over her chats with Derpy (especially with Rainbow basically telling Derpy she got a better-paying job while Rainbow is becoming chief weathermare) and the rest of the Mane Six one-by-one (particularly Fluttershy and Rainbow reassuring each other and the details of Pinkie's upcoming party).

If there is more coming in this remastered universe, I'm definitely looking forward to it.

I'm glad to see that this story has finished. This ending is better than the original and I like how this one keeps the ending more contained and how it shows each of the Mane Six and Derpy where they are now.

Excellent ending to this rewrite. Great job. let us hope Neighsay gets a... stern talking-to. :p

Lovely way to end it. This whole story has been a heck of a ride, and I'm glad I could be here for it. I will eagerly await your next masterpiece.

“Oh yeah.” Dash shrugged nonchalantly. “They need somepony to be in charge of the paperwork: requisition forms, weather reports. Pretty boring if you ask me, but I guess that’s why it pays better than simply pushing a cloud around all day.”

You clever mare.

Rainbow Dash smiled, but groaned under the weight. If this sort of thing kept up, it’d totally ruin her reputation and her spinal column. Oh well.

Worth it.

Unless,” she added with a smirk. “You’re that afraid I’ll plant more apple trees than you.”

She knows exactly how to get to her.

“It would hardly be considered generous if I gave away something I wanted to get rid of.”

I suppose not, no.

She suspected Rarity might have been hamming it up a bit for her own sake.

Probably.

“It’s hardly a Sonic Rainboom, after all,” Fluttershy demurred. “Only you can do that. Anypony could’ve done what I did.”

Demurr, I don't think is a word.

“Besides,” Fluttershy added in a whisper, “we both know the biggest heel ever is my brother.”

I love Sassyshy.

Why, my Granny Pie can still cut loose and tear up the dance floor even though the last time I tried putting one candle for all her birthdays on a cake, I had to make it the size of the dinner table and almost burned the house down!”

You, worry me.

Pinkie leaned forward until Rainbow had to back up slightly. “You were going to say how great a friend I am, how much I helped when you all got stuck in the Swamp of Despair and how you’re going to book me as your official party planner for your next hundred birthdays and any and all other anniversaries, birthaversaries, bat marevahs, promotions, victories and attendant celebratory events?” Her poofy tail waggled hopefully and she grinned without even a semblance of shame.

HAH!

“You have a secret party planning cave?!” She looked up at Pinkie. “This is so cool!”

She's Batmare!

I talked with Celestia and she agreed to give you some personal magic tutoring from her.”

That'll be fun.

10169176

She's Batmare!

See chapter 20:

Rainbow didn’t even question it, or when Pinkie Pie ducked into an alcove and started monologuing to herself about being the night.

A lovely ending to a remaster of one of my favorite fics! 10/10!

10169315
IMO, it's because Hasbro didn't have anyone in charge of continuity
There was often no follow up for ideas.
For instance Fluttershy & The Pony Tons
or Rarity refurbishing the tapestries in The Castle of the Two Sisters, for instance

10169176
Also, demurred is the past tense of demure.

“Where do you stand on the important issues of the day? Chocolate, vanilla or strawberry?

Strawberry chocolate, of course. :rainbowhuh:

I really get why Shining Armor wanted the two of us to meet. I think we kinda compliment each other.

You could say that. I think he's just a TwiDash shipper like me. After all, he openly admitted he wanted you for a little sister, Rainbow! :trollestia::derpytongue2::pinkiehappy:

“Wel-come...” Rainbow wheezed from the floor getting teary-eyed herself, though in her case it was a combination of the dust kicked up and the lack of oxygen. “Twi—air? Air!

:pinkiegasp: Now, kiss!

:facehoof::rainbowderp:

If you, or Equestria, ever need me, you’ll know where I’ll be.

Awesomely your student forever,

Rainbow Dash

Aww...

:rainbowkiss:

10171592
Eh ... to be honest I thought Applejack's line to Apple Bloom in Somepony To Watch Over Me about "well, you got the cart up here by yourself ergo that's proof enough that you don't need to babied" was a phenomenally stupid thing for her to say, given the circumstances. It pretty much said "yep, your risky, stupid tactic paid off since it proved that sneaking out, lying, stealing, going to a terribly dangerous place all on your own IS proof of maturity!" It was really dumb.

I am in full agreement on your main point though, with the regression of the characters in the CMC's last episode--though, in my opinion, almost all the last solo episodes for the Mane Six in Season 9 were pretty bad and showed a lot of retreading old ground and not showing them at their best; flanderizing them rather than letting them end on a high note.

I just read the original and remaster back- to back. I thought I was reading the remaster the first time.

It does seem that the focus is a bit more on Rainbow during the scene of the final conflict. This diminishes the actions of her friends somewhat. And I do miss Ditzy's motherly wisdom. However, that last part never was necessary for the story and new readers can't miss what they don't know.

The ending is definitely an improvement though.

10202558
I think it's logical that a socialite like Rarity would know the who's who in Canterlot. Granted, she had never heard of Twilight before in the first episode of the show, but there are a lot of things about the first episode of the show that don't make sense.

Finally finally finally got to read through the last couple of chapters in one hit. Mad at myself for taking so long to do so, but so glad I let them build up to where I could fly through them. You have definitely mastered the art of cliffhangers. Thank you for going through the time, effort and trouble of remastering this story. It has been well worth it to read and enjoy.

Comment posted by Aldea Donder deleted Aug 3rd, 2020

Right! Work has become slow enough once more that I basically get paid to stand around all day. Time to get back to reading!

10482404
I'm not as big a fan of that show - it's by no means bad, but I've only watched it through once.

10482432
In all seriousness, I really appreciate you going through and leaving your thoughts. Thanks!!!

I do like how this ending more then the original. Keep up the good work

10494508
What’s the difference between the original story and the remastered version?

10682594

more that these were the values that mattered the most to them and are necessary to forging friendship

That's what I figured you were going for; it's just, there's never an actual moment in the story where Rainbow Dash notices that Applejack has Honesty or Rarity has Generosity, or even that they're explicitly named as such. Celestia saying that Dash has the Element of Loyalty is literally the first time it's mentioned.

“Yeah, like what? Two, maybe three times as much?”

My little Pony: Nepotism is Magic

“I figured I’d leave something for the seaponies to snack on while they’re passing through.”

"We're carnivoresss! We don't eat applesss!"
"Oh well then you can just go an' buck yourself sideways."

What matters is that the Diamond Dogs did keep their word and they showed up to offer us their support against Nightmare Moon when they didn’t have to.

I do wish we'd seen the Diamond Dogs again; they were fun villains and it's not like "A Dog and Pony Show" is considered a bad episode (far from it, it's a highlight of the season). Maybe the comics will do something interesting with them; I know there's plans to include them, anyway.

“I guess if Equestria ever needs someone to bridge over a millennium of fear and suspicion they’ll know to call Fluttershy from now on.”

"Also they've offered to turn me into Flutterbat. Apparently that's a thing. They told me to 'think of the memes'."

we both know the biggest heel ever is my brother.

Favorite reaction moment in all of MLP remains when Zephyr implied that Dash is still carrying a torch for her.

The Pies were always really long-lived!

"Also in at least one alternate universe it's implied that I can travel through time and I founded a town called Tiatarta."
"That's a weird name."
"I know! It's not something sensible like Manehattan or Trottingham or Ponyville or Canterlot or..."

I never did let her throw me a party when I moved in.

That is nothing short of incredible. In the sense of "lacking in credulousness". I'm now imagining Pinkie Pie making a nightly deal of staking out Golden Oaks just waiting for Twilight to show some signs of her being amenable to a party so that a surprise party can be sprung on her with the greatest of panache and precision.

10693586

Hmm, there were several bits of Rainbow Dash thinking about her good times with Celestia back when she was sitting in Fluttershy's house way back in chapter five. Would you be suggesting moving those here instead?

The only issue is that having multiple paragraphs to convey the same idea would pad this out unnecessarily. Rainbow has a memory of Celestia. Rainbow is sad she's gone. Lather, rinse, repeat. It'd bog things down as much as the actual swamp just to keep hammering the same point home.

I guess it depends on your opinion what the major themes of the story are. Is Rainbow's relationship with Celestia a major theme? If so, then I don't think it hurts to come back it it from multiple different angles.

I definitely wouldn't remove the memories from Chapter 5, but I do think there's an opportunity in this chapter to re-contextualize those memories, if you wanted to. In Chapter 5, the memories were presented in the context of Rainbow's recent distance from Celestia, her independent streak. Whereas in Chapter 16, Rainbow's heart has just been blown open by Celestia's death. Her emotional state is totally different now.

In my opinion, what matters isn't necessarily describing Rainbow's memories. It's using those memories to explore Rainbow's emotional state, getting to better understand her as a character. Memories are just a tool, a means to an end, that's all... It just so happens that the plot developments of this chapter provide an interesting framework to explore her memories, and through them, her emotions. The swamp literally causes her to remember bad things that have happened to her and experience the sadness of those events... As far as her grief over Celestia, it kind of writes itself.

And coincidentally, it also sorta rhymes with what happened in Chapter 5. To me, that's a nifty feature, not a bug. But I mean, you could show us some entirely new memories here instead of recycling from the previous chapter, and it would still work. Rainbow and Celestia have, like, a decade of experiences to draw on, I'm sure there's no shortage of stuff for her to remember... This is just me spitballing ideas, take it as you will.

10693771
Hmm. Check your notes, please.

10699333
Well that's really a problem because none of that is what I want her to come off as. At all. I despise, no, loathe The Mysterious Mare-Do-Well and do not in any way, shape or form consider her depiction there to be accurate or in-character.

Comment posted by Aldea Donder deleted Apr 13th, 2021

10776027

And on the subject of overplaying something, I also did quite a bit of that in the Sombra story with Rainbow Dash’s feelings for Shining Armor. You know how sometimes when writing when you want to have a conflict and have us empathize with one character that you end up demonizing the other? Yeaaah, kinda did that with Dash’s thing for Shining Armor. I just really piled a ton of crap on Dash to deal there with so her eventual triumph against all that would be all the grander. But that might not have been executed too well.

Her feelings for Shining were largely always meant to be more of a fillyhood crush thing (or if I’m misremembering my own mindset when I wrote that story, that’s how I currently think it -should- have always been handled in hindsight) rather than suggesting it was full-blown unrequited love or something along those lines. That’s just my own evolution on the matter and don’t really want to get into all my thinking on that question.

I think it would disembowel the emotional core of Hot Heads, Cold Hearts if you were to strip out Rainbow's strong feelings for Shining Armor. Actually, Rainbow's one-sided crush was one of the things I really, really liked a lot about R&R, because it makes Rainbow Dash all the more complex as a character, and it's completely realistic. It's one of those notes where when you strike it, it just sounds right: "Yeah, if she had grown up in Canterlot, she probably would have fallen for Shining Armor."

Do what you will with this rewrite, but IMO I think the downplaying of Rainbow's romantic feelings is ever-so-slightly misguided, and it does create some dissonance with the sequel.

I think we kinda compliment each other.

Complement.

I don’t have anything more to say about this chapter, except that it’s about as perfect a final chapter as this story could possibly have. Rainbow Dash is genuinely wonderful in every single one of the snippets from her new life in Ponyville; she’s a much more likable character here than she was earlier in the story. And ending on a letter to Princess Celestia brings the story full circle with the cartoon.

Thanks for bearing with me. I know it’s taken me a while, but if you look at the update schedule for my own fanfic… Most things do!

I’ve got a lot to say about this story as compared with the original, so I suppose I’ll end with a distillation of my thoughts on the rewrite as a whole.

First, the overall quality of writing — vastly improved. This version is a lot more surefooted about things like spelling, grammar, and mechanics. However, still not without some problems. The biggest offender is the tendency to overuse dialogue tags. Festooning a paragraph with a lot of tags, such as “she sighed,” or “he frowned,” tends to weaken writing, not strengthen it. Likewise, frequently interrupting dialogue should be strenuously avoided, even if it’s to advance the scene. Stay away from things like this:

“Yeah, I know who I am.” Rainbow offered her most cheesy grin. “Come on, really? That’s all you got?” She didn’t know her very well, so she was stalling until she could think of something. “So, ah … I don’t know you, but you work with Cloud and Derpy. I’m betting that you’re friends, since they’re pretty easy to get along with. Does any of this seem right to you?” She stepped back so she was standing in the middle of the green mist, flanked by the fake Dinky and Alula. “This isn’t who any of you are. Think!”

The best writing has a certain style to it, a certain rhythm, but paragraphs like this forsake that. This reads like the stream of consciousness of a writer just trying to put stuff down on the page; more rough draft than finished copy. For a reader, it’s exhausting to read, because the eye has to hunt for about three or four times as many quotation marks to know whether a particular passage is part of spoken dialogue or not. It’s also disruptive because it constantly interrupts the flow of what’s going on. Breaking up these paragraphs and eliminating superfluous tags is the #1 thing you could do to further improve this story, and the #1 thing you should pay attention to in your future writing to improve your craft.

What I wrote above is 100% objective truth, no buts about it. Everything else I’m about to say is my personal opinion and nothing more.

Rainbow Dash — I wrote in one of my earliest reviews that she came off as a diva, and I’m afraid my assessment didn’t change until the last several chapters. In my opinion, this is the problem: Rainbow’s prideful nature, bullheadedness, and self-obsession make her obnoxious and unlikable for most of the story, and apart from those things, there isn’t a lot of dimension to her character for a reader to find endearing.

I share your attitude that episodes like Mare Do Well are bad, but I think we despise them for different reasons. You seem to resent them for their morals, because in your view, it’s always a good thing to take pride in yourself and your accomplishments, and being force-fed modesty and humility is bad. Whereas in my opinion (and, I think, most of the fandom’s opinion) — the problem with those episodes wasn’t just the moral. It was that Rainbow was portrayed as a totally insufferable asshole from start to finish, and it ruined her character. She really should have been written with more nuance.

I think that difference in interpretation really comes across in this version of R&R. In a way, it’s actually very interesting, because as much as you dislike Mare Do Well, the R&R version of Rainbow Dash feels a lot like the Mare Do Well version of Rainbow Dash to me: arrogant, self-obsessed, totally ungrateful, pigheaded, and dismissive of others. All in all, I found it very hard to root for Rainbow Dash for most of this story. She reminds me too much of a stereotypical high school jock. They’re both capable, and they can do amazing things. But being able to pull off a sonic rainboom or throw a football down a field doesn’t give me much reason to like you if you’re shallow and arrogant to boot.

In order for a prideful character to be likable, they need “shell breaks.” From time to time, we need to be able to see past their prideful exterior to glimpse their inner humanity, their weaknesses, their doubts, their insecurities, and all the other soft innards that make them relatable. The problem is that in this story, Rainbow Dash doesn’t have any shell breaks. There’s never a moment where she exposes a bit of her humanity, where she begins to doubt or question herself. To the contrary, Rainbow’s confidence, tenacity, and determination are put on a pedestal, never to be questioned. And because of that, I think she’s a lot less likable and relatable than she could be.

Now, switching gears. Let’s talk about Celestia, let’s talk about Rainbow’s motivations, and let’s talk about the premise for this fic.

Why does Rainbooms and Royalty exist? Is it just to prove the point, “Rainbow Dash is a badass, I think she should/could have been the main character of the show, here’s an alternate reality fanfic with her as Celestia’s protégé to prove it?” If that was your mission, I think you accomplished it.

However, I think the table was set for an even more interesting story. I think there’s untapped potential here.

I would’ve been interested to see more of the differences between this Rainbow Dash and the canon Rainbow Dash, and how her Canterlot upbringing changed her as an individual. I would’ve been interested to see her feelings for Shining Armor fully explored, rather that being dangled and then dismissed as a childhood crush.

But most of all, I would’ve liked to see more of the relationship between Rainbow Dash and Celestia. It might be my bias talking, given the subject matter of my own fanfic. But I think Rainbow’s relationship to Celestia is the most intriguing thing about this ’verse.

Unfortunately, it’s also the biggest casualty of the remaster.

Celestia’s place in Rainbow’s heart has been totally de-emphasized in this version of R&R. The Princess and the Derp has been excised. There isn’t that moment where Celestia and Rainbow Dash realize the bonds that bind them together are made of something more immutable than mere affection; where they find healing in their love for one another, and embrace each other as mother and daughter.

Instead, in this version, Rainbow’s relationship to Celestia is almost entirely professional. And I think the story loses a lot of heart because of it.

In many of the reviews I left on earlier chapters, I wrote about how certain situations could have been utilized to explore Rainbow’s grief in the aftermath of Celestia’s death. Usually, the comment back was something along the lines of, “I didn’t want to harp on it too much, because I thought dwelling too long on Rainbow’s sadness over Celestia would be redundant.” But I think that misses the forest for the trees. A story about Rainbow Dash resenting Celestia at the outset, running away from her — then failing her, being forced to watch her die — then having to go on this mission to recover the Elements of Harmony at the same time she’s grieving, going through the five stages, trying to reconcile with what Celestia meant to her, wrestling with powerful negative emotions like guilt and regret — then prevailing against Nightmare Moon in spite of her inner turmoil, prevailing by showing loyalty to her memory of Celestia and what Celestia stood for — and finally, at the very end, embracing Celestia as a daughter — I think that could have been an even more interesting, nuanced, heartfelt, and emotional journey, not only for Rainbow Dash, but also for the reader. It would have also given Rainbow the shell breaks she needed to be likable.

Maybe that's not fair of me. I might be guilty of foisting too many of my own preferences. It might not even be the story you wanted to write... But darn, that's a story I'd really like to read!

All that being said, there are a lot of things that are unquestionably better in the remaster than in the original. Princess Luna is much improved in this version, and it speaks so much more highly of Rainbow Dash that she’s the one to offer her hoof to Luna, instead of harboring some childish grudge. Rainbow as peacemaker between Luna and Derpy/Cloud Kicker is a nice touch. Other characters, like Twilight, are also much more well-rounded.

That’s about all I have. I know you’ve taken time to thank me after every comment I’ve left, but allow me to thank you, Trinary, for writing Rainbooms and Royalty, and for loving it enough to write a remaster all these years later! Thank you all the more for remaining active in the community to this day. I’ve seen a lot of good authors come and go. For my part, the fanfiction was always a much bigger draw than any other aspect of the community, and Rainbow Dash was always my favorite character. So thank you for being one of the amazing people who made this fandom special for me, and for continuing to make it special to this day. :twilightsmile:

11243971
I skim them, but I don't read walls of text after already reading a chapter of a story, no.

Poor Spike, stuck in Canterlot working at the school.

Are you going to continue with others in the saga? Also, did you think about her visiting the 'canon' verse after following Starlight Glimmer? Or there are no more plans for a sequel in any story?

Is this a full sequel to Rainbooms and Royalty? I perused the third chapter of both and it seems to be verbatim. I'd love to read both stories if there is a difference.

Login or register to comment