• Published 18th Jul 2012
  • 16,685 Views, 1,132 Comments

But, She's a Pony! - Uke-Joe

Starring You and Fluttershy, your new roommate at your apartment.

  • ...

Chapter 6

Chapter 6


Pillows are great, and they had been and always would be your favorite sleeping accessory. Your pillow at the apartment was a feather pillow, and of course you slept with it every night. However, in the case of most feather pillows, one did not simply find a pile of feathers and sleep on it. There were layers of cloth, fabric, and whatever else pillow cases had in them resting between one you and your wonderfully plush pile of feathers.

So naturally, when you first awoke to a face full of feathers, you would have appreciated a similar comfort. What made it odd was that these feathers were neat, straightened out, and organized. This didn't matter enough to deter you from going back to sleep, however. You fluff your pillow and attempt to go back to sleep.

A similarly feathered surface greets your face as you attempt to return to sleep. You smile and curl up under your blanket, arm draped over your lovely pillow.

“Drew,” a quiet voice says, and interrupts your sleep, “Um- if you don't mind me asking... What are you doing?”

You grunt out a drowsy response, “Go back to sleep Flutters, it's too early.” A glance at the nearby alarm clock confirms that it is early, 6:00 in the morning.

A moment of silence passes, and you shut your eyes. You begin to feel yourself sink back into the wonderful depths of sleep, only to be interrupted again.

“Drew,” Fluttershy began, “Are you using me as a pillow?”

Your eyes snap back open as her sentence is processed in your head. You began to become more aware of your surroundings. Your drowsiness faded as you realized that this isn't a pillow, this is a Fluttershy. You were spread out across the majority of the bed, one arm lying across Fluttershy and your head and neck resting on her side. In the middle of the night, you must have shifted positions so that you were now facing the same way Fluttershy was. You quickly scrambled out of bed.

“Oh, well, the cot never got here-” you begin to explain. Fluttershy turns to face you, but once looking at you, she squeals and looks away, clearly embarrassed by something.

“Alrighty then...” Standing in your typical sleeping wear, a pair of boxers and a tee-shirt, the somewhat chilly air reminds you that you should probably get dressed for the day. It wasn't like you could go back to bed now even if you wanted, after being shocked awake by that. You walk over into the bathroom. While relieving yourself of the sodas you had accompanied your delicious pizza with, you realize why Fluttershy had suddenly gotten so embarrassed. Your stomach rumbling at the reminder of last nights pizza cuts off any further thought, however, and you dress and make your way down to the lobby for the complimentary breakfast. The cot had been place right next to your door. You make a note to wheel it in when you return.

Not normally a breakfast person, you grab the last muffin that is in the container. A gray pony that had been approaching the muffins stops and looks saddened, so you hand her your muffin and smile.

“Drew Smith, what a neighborly fellow,” a familiar voice speaks as a gray mare runs off with her muffin. You grab a donut from the nearby case before turning around and answering.

“Whatcha doin' Willis?” you respond to Mark.

“Nothing much. Woke up early so I thought I'd go eat something.”

“Fair enough.” You take your donut and join Mark at a table.

“So how was last night, man?” he asks.

“Uneventful,” you lie, hoping not to have to explain your awkward situation to Mark, knowing he would eventually harass you about it for the rest of the day.

“You sure about that? 'Cause your hair begs to differ...” He points upwards. You brush your head and find some yellow under-feathers within. You sigh and begin to explain to an already grinning Mark.

“So, Fluttershy accidentally booked a room that only had one bed. I tried getting a cot but fell asleep before it got to my room. I woke up using Fluttershy as a pillow.”

“A likely story.” Mark winks, “Kidding man, who doesn't want to sleep with them sexy ponies?”

A person sitting at the table behind Mark looks towards you, disgusted, but you ignored it and resumed your conversation.

“At any rate, ponies tend to be pretty understanding and accepting of things, so I doubt Fluttershy won’t mind too much.” Mark chuckles, “Heh- when I first did it with Cool Breeze, I messed up so much, different cultures and all. But in the end she ended up-”

At this, the person who had just given you a disgusted look, a grumpy wrinkly man within his fifties most likely, had interrupted Mark.

“I don't need any more talk of your disgusting horse fucking ways. Not here. Go back to Equestria where the rest of you horse lovers end up.” His voice was stern and demanding.

You wanted to say something, but Mark gave you a look as if to tell you to let it go. You realize he was probably right, that getting in an argument with this guy would get you nowhere. Mark wasn't the type of guy to get upset anyway. In response you followed him as he left.

“Mark-” you said as he entered the elevator, pressing the button to his floor number, not really giving you the opportunity to finish.

“There's a reason I moved to Equestria. I met Cool Breeze over the summer here. Some people here are cool with pony-human relationships; but then there's that type of guy.”

“But still, if he was talking to me-” You tried to compensate.

“You would have walked away. Imagine if you and Fluttershy were together, you wouldn't want to stop and take the time to fight everyone that came up to you and called you a zoo-sexual. It would probably frighten Fluttershy for one, and also drop an assault charge on you. I could have sat there and explained to him that my girlfriend has a great job, great ass, and is incredibly smart and totally sentient. But it wouldn't have mattered to him; he just doesn’t want to take the time to think about it. ”

He was right, of course. Walking away from fights had always been Mark's style, not that he had really ever been inflammatory enough to anyone to make them want to fight him. The elevator door slowly opened at his floor.

“I guess you're right. Just one question.” You held the elevator door so it didn’t close. “Why would you think about me and Fluttershy like that?”

He smiled as he answered, “Let's face it Drew, who gets a room with one bed by accident?” He chuckled, “There are barely any of those in this hotel. The process of reserving hotel rooms isn't that different from here to Equestria.”

He stepped away from the door, and you let it close. You press the number for your floor and grinned at his joke. Mark was always a pretty easy going guy.

Upon entering the room, you see Fluttershy was still sleeping. You take the opportunity to go shower. A few more feathers were washed out of your hair. By the time you walk out of the shower it was 8:00 and Fluttershy still hasn't woken up. You pulled out your laptop and logged onto Facebook.

Andrew Smith: In Chicago. Any suggestions on what to do today? Visited Aquarium already.

Scrolling through your friends statuses, you found absolutely nothing interesting. Of course, Abbotsville was not an exciting place; so it was no surprise. You clicked on the notification that appeared.

Rainbow Dash: Hey Fluttershy is supposed to be meeting us today! Come along with her!

You responded to Rainbow with a chat message.

Andrew Smith: Where and when? Should Fluttershy be up getting ready yet, because she's still sleeping.

Rainbow Dash: Navy Pier, and about an hour. Wake her up and remind her would ya?

Andrew Smith: Sure, I'll probably tag along. It'll be cool to meet Fluttershy's friends

Rainbow Dash: Haha, yeah we are pretty awesome! From what Fluttershy's told us you're an alright guy too, so it'll be fun to have ya along.

Andrew Smith: An 'alright guy'. What a stunning review

Rainbow Dash: Okay so she thinks you're a pretty cool guy actually. Just wake her up! We'll meet you over there okay?

Andrew Smith: Sure thing. Later.

You shut your laptop and walked over to Fluttershy. Unsure of how to wake her, you decide to shake her. She remained peacefully sleeping. You shook her a little harder, but again she kept sleeping. Since it worked so well last time you woke her up, you attempt to fluff her once again, like she was an oversized pony shaped pillow. You take a step back as she wakes up. She gave a cute little yawn and stretched, oblivious to your presence.

“Hey Fluttershy,” you began, somewhat startling her.

“Oh, hello, Drew,” she replied with a squeak.

“Rainbow told me to wake you up because you're supposed to be meeting her and some friends in an hour.” A smile had appeared on your face.

She looked at the nearby alarm clock, and leaped out of bed, dashing for the bathroom. You called out to her.

“Wait, I wanted to say something about this morning!”

She pauses at the doorway in the bathroom, “Oh, I'm sorry for invading your privacy Drew, it won't happen again.” She scampered over to the bathroom and started the shower.

Whatever she meant by her invading your privacy, it didn't particularly matter to you. Mark was right, ponies were pretty easy going. Lacking anyone to talk to, you pull out your phone and start throwing birds at pigs. After a few unfruitful attempts at completing a level, you rage quit and delete the game from your phone. Fluttershy wouldn't approve of the animal cruelty anyways.

By the time Fluttershy exited the shower and had gotten ready, you had barely 20 minutes to meet up with her friends. You and Fluttershy walk out and down the stairs to the lobby.

“Fluttershy, if you don't dry off your coat is going to get all windblown and...” you search for a specific word, “fluffy”. You held the door out for her to exit the hotel.

“Oh, I know, but I can't let my friends down. I told them I would be there. I'll just hope there's no wind today.” She sounded determined.

As you stepped outside, the windy city lived up to its name. “Sorry Flutters...”

You escaped from the rushing wind onto a bus and wait for it to stop nearby Navy Pier. With a short hike you reach the entrance where a group of multicolored ponies were waiting. Judging by Fluttershy's reaction, her simply leaping up and flying towards them, you assume that these are her very close friends. By the time you reach them, Fluttershy was excitedly introducing you to all of her friends.

“Drew this is Twilight, Pinkie, Rainbow, Rarity, and Applejack.” Only Applejack is a new face, the rest you have seen on either Facebook or when Fluttershy would be Skyping with them. You lightly waved to the group.

“Wow it's so good to meet you, Drew! I can already tell we're going to be best of friends!” Pinkie Pie crushes the chance for anyone else to talk to you by rambling on and on about how great friends the both of you would be. Looking at Fluttershy's friends, they all mouth, “It's just Pinkie," and begin walking towards all the attractions. You followed them, smiling and nodding at everything that the bouncing pink mare said.

“...And that's how Equestria was made!” Pinkie screamed just as you reach the rest of the group of ponies. They didn't take very long trying out everything they ran across. Twilight justified spending obscene amounts of money on all sorts of attractions because she needed to “gather information on a new culture," but clearly everyone was having a good time. Twilight apparently received a very large allowance from her mentor that which she was expected to spend on this trip, so she was more than glad to treat everyone to lunch.

Although you were craving something with meat, you didn't want to offend anypony. Apparently, fish were an exception to this rule, so you ordered shrimp as did Pinkie. The group took this opportunity to question you.

“So Drew, where are you from?” asks Rarity.

You put down your soda, swallowing a gulp, “A bit of everywhere. For a year or two I lived just an hour or so away from here. I moved around a lot as a kid.”

“That must have made it hard to make many friends,” says Twilight.

You thought about this, “I guess Mark was the friend that I'd had for the longest really. We had been roommates for two years after all. But in general moving often kinda sucked.”

“Also must have made it hard to find a special somepony...” mutters Rainbow.

“Rainbow!” exclaims Rarity.

Assuming this was something or someone similar to a special somebody, you just kept quiet. In all your years of high school and college you had never had a girlfriend, not that you had ever particularly minded or developed actual feelings for any girl. It was just something that didn't cross your mind very often.

Twilight decided now would be a good time to change the subject. “So Fluttershy, how is school?”

“Oh it's really great! Life at Abbotsville is nice and quiet.”

The conversation headed more towards what Fluttershy was doing than about you. After lunch, you decided you needed a nap, and couldn't go on. The ponies all said goodbye and you told Twilight to call you when they were leaving so Fluttershy wouldn't get lost taking the bus back to the hotel.


At four in the afternoon you rose from the bed, still unable to sleep. Until Twilight called, you walked around town aimlessly taking the bus from place to place. You snapped a few photos to add to your Facebook album, but really didn't go to anywhere special. Twilight called around 8 PM in which that they were most likely heading out soon, so you hopped on a bus and met Fluttershy there. You arrived back at the hotel at about 9ish.

“So Flutters, how was your day with your friends?” you inquired.

“It was fun, they all missed me; but Twilight said she might be staying on Earth for a bit longer than expected. So she would be glad to meet up with us again sometime,” Fluttershy responded.

“Oh really? What's she doing?”

“Well, she's supposed to take notes on how ponies are adapting to life on earth and how humans react to ponies.”

You respond as you open up the cot, “That's interesting, w-”

You freeze mid sentence.

“Oh, yes! I was hoping that, if you didn't mind, she could- EEP!”

Inside your cot was a family of spiders, all milling about the covers. Slightly less than 10 seconds later, the cot had been cleared from the room. Unfortunately, that also meant your chances of a good night's rest were out the door. You began to settle with the idea of sleeping on the floor when Fluttershy spoke up.

“Um, if you don't want to sleep on the floor, you don't have to...”

“Thanks Flutters, but I'm not going to kick you off your bed.”

She paused before responding, “Actually, you could sleep on one side if you wanted, I mean...” she said.

You considered her offer. “You sure you don't mind?”

“I just don't want you to be sleepy all of tomorrow,” says Fluttershy

You situated yourself on the side of the bed next to the wall as Fluttershy got ready for bed. You flinched as she got into bed, hoping for no more awkward scenarios. You bumped your head against the backboard whilst trying to give Fluttershy some space.

“Drew, you don't have to give me all the bed... You’re bigger than me...”

You turned around and moved to what feels like a few inches away from the wall. The bed creaked and Fluttershy moved a little bit closer to you. You were startled at how close she was, your heart moving faster than a race horse.

“Hey Drew?” she asks.

“Yeah Flutters?”

“Thanks for bringing me around today. Cities are a little.... scary.”

“Not a problem,” you reply. A moment of silence passes.

“Hey Drew?”

“Yeah Flutters?”

She closed the distance kissing you on the cheek. She moved back slightly. “Good night Drew.”

“...Good night Flutters.”

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