Dinner. Celestia made the reasonable assumption that sitting down to dinner together made them very much like any other family, just with a nicer table and silverware. Oh, and they ate together in a castle too, but it wasn’t that far fetched to assume that it wasn’t that different from an average family. Cadance and Shining Armor were here, with little Flurry in a chair like a big filly, though she needed a booster seat. Luna was present, sitting at the other end of the table, though she was rather sleepy looking, and Gosling was sitting just to Celestia’s right.
Sighing, Celestia wished others were present, but if wishes were fishes, they would all be griffons.
The hors d'oeuvres were coming out, and Celestia was eager to see them, so eager in fact that she craned her neck in very much the same manner as an over-excited foal. Flurry too, was wiggling about in her chair, and drumming her hooves against the edge of the table. Gosling was wrapped up in his cloak, though he had taken his hood down at the table.
A tray of delicious looking canapés was set down upon the table, and Celestia sighed with contentment. As far as hors d'oeuvres went, these were perfectly suitable, but she prefered the nights when the hors d'oeuvres doubled as mini-desserts. It was difficult, eating for four and trying to be princessly.
It was all she could do not to devour the entire tray of canapés and she waited for others to get some first, all while staring with longing at the tray just a few yards away from her. When the others had served themselves, Celestia lifted the entirety of the tray, levitated it over to where she sat, paying no mind to the stares of others, she set it down, and she began eating, thankful that it was good manners to stuff the entire canapé in, whole.
Little Flurry stared at her plate, looking both curious and disgusted, trying to figure out what this weird new food was. She reached out one dainty, tiny hoof, prodded the edge of her plate, and gave her mother an incredulous look.
“Brains?”
“How would you know what brains look like?” Cadance asked, with a note of exasperation in her voice.
“Daddy’s comic books?” Flurry did her best to look innocent.
Cadance made a sound and she glanced over at her husband. Luna began snickering. Shining Armor gave his wife a sheepish grin, revealing a row of perfect teeth. Flurry didn’t take her eyes off of her plate. Celestia found herself grinning, even though she was eating. Alas, poor Gosling, he stared at his food and did nothing.
“Flurry, those are sulfur shelf mushrooms… laetiporus gilbertsonii. Ponies call them tree brains. When they are young and tender, they are delicious when sautéd in butter and a little garlic.” Cadance looked tired, and her explanation lacked enthusiasm for the subject matter. It also did nothing to reassure Flurry, who continued to stare at her plate, much to her mother’s dismay.
“Cadance, dear, were you able to get some rest?” Celestia asked after she swallowed her food.
Lifting her head, Flurry’s ears stood up. “Mommy and Daddy wrestled and jumped on the bed,” she announced in a squeaky voice. Then she looked at her father and her face became as stern as a foal’s face could be. “Daddy was rough, Mommy was crying.”
A shade of pink, never before seen in nature or this plane of existence, manifested upon Cadance’s face. Celestia could see Cadance’s panic in the way she stared, pleading, begging with her eyes, but there was no way that this could be left alone. Luna was chortling, so much so that Celestia feared that her sister might choke.
“Shining Armor, what do you have to say for yourself?” Celestia asked, playing it straight, and she delighted in Cadance’s mortified expression. Shining squirmed in his seat, just like he did when he was a little colt. Not much had changed over the years, even though everything had changed. It seemed as though it was mere moments ago that Cadance and Shining Armor were both still foals, and she was lecturing them about snogging. Too much snogging led to chapped lips, and chapped lips were distracting in class.
The white alicorn sighed while cramming in multiple canapés at once and began chewing.
Flurry Heart stared at her father and Shining Armor stared at his daughter. Cadance hovered somewhere near the point of spontaneous combustion, and Luna was dangerously close to choking. Celestia’s most firm conviction held true—foals made everything better, and she couldn’t wait to have her own. It had been far too long. Chaos such as this was delightful.
“Mistah Goose, you wrestle Luna?” Flurry asked, giving Gosling an innocent, wide-eyed stare. “Hold her down and make her cry?”
A stream of crumbs and half-chewed food shot from Luna’s mouth, she coughed, and then she sputtered. The clouds that cast a pall over Gosling dissolved, and he began chuckling, shaking beneath his heavy cloak. Cadance covered her face with both front hooves, and Shining Armor was glad the attention was no longer focused upon him.
The first course had gone well.
Soup. At the moment, Celestia wanted to take the entire soup tureen and drink it dry. She was already feeling panicky, the soup bowls were too dainty, too small, it would be gone too soon and she would expire from starvation. Honestly, who thought a soup bowl that held a half a cup of soup was a good idea?
When the soup was ladled into her bowl, all of her muscles tensed, and when the single crouton was added, Celestia wanted to cry. She could eat a kitchen full of croutons right now, she wanted to eat, not sample. But she couldn’t cause a scene, not now, not after the table had started to quiet down.
“What is this?” Luna asked, eyeing her bowl. “It appears to be a bowl of poorly balanced humours.”
The unicorn server paused and one eyebrow raised. “Majesty, this is cream of cheese soup, with garlic. Tonight’s cheese is the finest Parlobarrony white, and it has been smoked to perfection. The garlic has been smoked as well, and the flavours involved compliment one another to the highest degree.”
“We shall take your word for it,” Luna replied, giving her floating crouton a dubious stare.
Turning, Celestia looked at Gosling, and she could see his distress. With no dextrous primaries, he had no means to hold a spoon. Feeling bad for him, she asked, “Gosling, do you want some help?”
Right away, she regretted it, and she noticed for the first time the tension in the room.
“I’m not a foal,” Gosling replied, and he stared down at his soup with a fierce, intense glare. After a moment, he looked up. “Where is my mother, anyhow?”
“She was worn out from looking after Flurry while I recovered.” Cadance lifted her head and looked at Gosling, her eyes both kind and worried. “She’s still pretty upset, Gosling, and she wanted some peace and quiet.”
“Yeah, I get it.” Hunching over, Gosling ducked his head down until his snoot was inches from his soup bowl, and he began to blow on it to cool it off.
The conversation needed a little careful herding to get it back to comfortable, if not happier territory, and Celestia took it upon herself to do so. “Well, the morning got off to a rough start, the afternoon was a little bumpy, but was everypony productive with what was left of the day?”
Nopony answered. The laughter from earlier seemed gone, and the mood had shifted. Celestia eyed her niece, Flurry, hoping the foal would cause some sort of mayhem, but Flurry looked half-awake at the moment, and on the verge of nodding off in her chair. Looking around, she saw Gosling lapping up his soup, which made her sigh. She didn’t mind him doing it, but why did he have to look so sad? It was awful.
Cadance, holding two spoons, was feeding both herself and Flurry, with the little filly too tired to fuss or resist. Shining Armor was stabbing his crouton, trying to break it in half, but really all he managed to do was make his soup slosh in his bowl. Luna, who might not have cared for how it looked, must have liked how it tasted, because her soup was already gone.
“Luna, I must ask you something.” Celestia turned to face her sister, and she looked into Luna’s eyes. “Tell me, Luna, why didn’t you give up little Moon Rose to the nurses and doctors? Why did you have to scare them so?”
For a brief second, Luna looked guilty, her ears sagged, but then she recoiled in anger. “We have Our reasons!”
“And that is what I am trying to discover,” Celestia said in a calm voice, trying to diffuse her sister’s choleric defiance.
Sensing that her professional help might be needed, Cadance interjected herself between the two sisters. “Total honesty is good. It helps when we understand each other’s motivations and gives us both understanding and insight into each other’s inner workings.”
“Cadance, please, I don’t think now is the time,” Shining Armor said as he gripped his wife’s fetlock with his own.
Now, Luna turned her ire upon Shining Armor. She glared at him with a fierce expression, her eyes narrowed, and both ears angled forwards over her face. “We find no fault with Cadance, Shining Armor, indeed, We find her help quite valuable. It is how We have been made better. Leave her be!”
“I didn’t mean anything by…” Shining Armor’s words lapsed into silence beneath Luna’s withering glare.
“Cadance has restored us to reason,” Luna continued, and she gestured at Gosling. “We have a friend… a very close friend. A friend who has saved Us. For this, We are most grateful.” Sucking in a deep breath, Luna turned to face her sister. “We wish that thou would trust Us, for We mean well. We could not let Moon Rose go alone. We had to remain close in the event that she might have gated in something else when the doctors made her sleep.”
Luna’s reasoning was sound, solid even, and Celestia found herself nodding. “You did right, sister, in keeping Moon Rose close. I didn’t mean to make you feel that I didn’t trust you, I just wanted to know your thoughts. I’m sorry.”
“We are sorry too, for Our outburst.” Lifting a napkin, Luna wiped her nose, though it was clean, and then she wiped her eyes. “It has been a long, difficult road out of Tartarus for Us. We want to be well, but it seems everypony is so suspicious of Us and Our motivations. It weighs heavily upon our spirit.”
Flurry Heart snorted as she snapped awake, startled, and soup ran down her fuzzy pink chin. Cadance didn’t skip a beat, she grabbed a napkin and went to work, still feeding herself. Shining Armor was looking at Luna, studying her, and Gosling had almost finished his soup. Celestia, a connoisseur of tension, could feel that some of it had dissipated, and her thoughts were interrupted by the sounds of silverware clinking against fine porcelain.
Yep, they were a family, a completely normal family, with completely normal problems.
Tonight’s entrée was a fine vegetable lasagna, served with eggplant cutlets. Celestia couldn’t help but feel that her portion of lasagna was the size of a postage stamp, and a feeling of growing frustration welled up inside of her. She was starving and these tiny, dainty portions threatened to be her undoing.
Before she could even realise it, everything boiled over. Everything. The Moon Rose incident. Gosling losing his feathers. The pressures of ruling a country that teetered upon the brink of utter anarchy. Celestia looked down at her half finished plate of food and the edges of her vision grew red from fury.
“I NEED FOOD, DAMNIT! I AM A PREGNANT MARE WHO MOVES THE SUN AND KEEPS THE CELESTIAL BODIES IN MOTION! I DEMAND SUSTENANCE IN MEANINGFUL PORTIONS! SERVANTS, BRING ME A PROPER MEAL AT ONCE, THIS INSTANT, OR FACE BANISHMENT INTO THE RAT-INFESTED CELLARS!”
Gosling, unphased by Celestia’s outburst—though perhaps a bit deafened by the Royal Canterlot Voice—looked his wife in the eye with a wry, thoughtful expression. “Is yous going all Nightmare Noon on us, Sweetums? Do yous need a timeout?”
No sooner had the words left Gosling’s mouth, when Luna choked, coughed, and horked up a half-chewed bite of eggplant cutlet. She then exploded with laughter, whooping and wheezing, still coughing, and she banged on the table with her front hooves as she fought to keep breathing. Flurry Heart, terrified, blinked many times and looked around, trying to make sense of the situation.
Shining Armor got up, hurried around the table, and began beating Luna on the back, trying to clear her airway, because she sounded as though she was going to choke to death in between peals of laughter. Cadance looked absolutely stunned and her eyes were as wide as supper plates.
“You…” Celestia’s eyes narrowed and she looked down at the somewhat smaller pegasus who was her mate. “You… you did this to me. You and your pretty birdy antics caused this to happen.” Even as she said the words, she knew she wasn’t being reasonable, but she just couldn’t be bothered to care. Pushing her chair back, she then rose from where she was sitting, gave herself a shake, did her best to look majestic, and snorted while throwing her head back.
“I am leaving to sack the kitchens.” She spat the words out, revelling in her own anger. “And then later, Gosling, I am coming for you!” With nothing left to say, she stormed out of the room, her stomach growling, off in search of a proper meal.
Still wheezing, Luna looked at Gosling with panicked eyes. “Thou art a dead little pony. Alas, We shall miss thee, brave pegasus!”
Though the kitchens may have dealt with a few pregnant mares among the palace staff, they are not at all prepared for whats headed their way now!
For some reason it irks me that it's not horse d'oeuvres
Flurry Heart is the best.
Nightmare Noon
Thou shalt maketh me fall out mine chair. And it is the laziest of chairs .MERRYMENT! HUZZAH!!
... wait sorry when did Celestia get pregnant?
8058917 The head-chef might very soon be a dead-chef assault on pantry!
8058966
At some point between The Perilous Romance of Swans and The Perilous Gestation of Swans, obviously.
So set in their ways of making "proper" meals for the royals that the kitchen staff clearly forgot that pregnancy cares not for rank or for proper etiquette befitting said rank.
Soon, the Royal Kitchens will be bare, with nothing left but a sprig of parsley (because nobody eats that, even if you're starving).
Two rats, huddled in the very bottom of the castle storeroom, looked at each other and whispered.
"Did you find anything?"
"Not even a crumb. How about you?"
"Would I be asking you if I did?" The first rat wiped his whiskers, hoping to find an unfinished crumb. "To heck with this. I'm going back into the Everfree where it's safer."
It takes a lot of food to feed an alicorn, and that's before you take into account that she's pregnant with triplets!
I can't help but wonder how well the family photos and videos are coming along for the public, how everypony is taking them, and if they really ARE going to be recording the birth.
That's about the moment you realize you need better locks.
And this is the point when you gotta wonder if the child knows exactly what she's saying and is just trolling them.
Also, Celestia's comment about enjoying this kind of chaos reminds me. Have we seen Discord yet? Is he even in this world? I'm not sure where exactly he'd fall in this conflict, both immediate and national.
Cut the 'is'
Once more I find the slice of life elements to be this story's real strengths.
8058969 Ah... as an author i have a problem with that as there's literally no info until today, if you haven't been keeping up with the weedverse. There wasn't any info in the prequel story either.
Furthemore, I got from Perilous Romance that Celestia ha always a sortof... not aversion but reluctance to indulge herself and well becoming a mother would be along that line. I might be wrong, and maybe I missed something but I find this a really sudden surprise.
Oh, God, the croutons! Won't someone think of the croutons!
Those poor servants must have been scared to death.
How about a short one shot with Gosling in full plumage display, going all out to impress Celestia? Clop optional.
8059000
I can't see how you saw it as an aversion... but that's because I always saw it as holding back. She has mentioned/thought multiple times about just ravishing
DuckyGosling. Her reluctance was due to his insistance on "doing it right" and waiting to be married.8059000 Well for the first part it's as you said. You have to keep up with all the stories in the Weedverse to understand everything as her pregnancy is mentioned in The Mask Makes the Pony. This is a multi story universe and skipping any part of it means you miss out on information.
As for the second... you need to reread Perilous Romance of Swans. Very early on she wants to be a mother again missing the days when she and Luna were getting pregnant like clockwork to help repopulate Equestria. The only thing keeping her back from jumping Gosling is her respect of his wishes to wait until marriage. She even tempts him quite a few times to give in and enjoy himself.
Nightmare Noontime Meal
At first I thought it a typo.
Then I read on.
I died a couple times.
Mistah Goose is so screwed.
10/10
Ah, the appetites of a pregnant, hormonal mare...
I suspect Celestia may sate another kind of appetite once she catches up with Gosling - good thing he got a durability upgrade
8059164 Except that a lot of times the incident isn't covered in any story and is just referred to obliquely forever.
8059241
Noodle incident. This time, Celestia was slipped a pegasus noodle.
Speaking of pregnancies, Cadance was pregnant again last story, right? Has she had her second yet?
I saw the bold text and read the first line from 3 paragraphs ahead and dear lord! There are other people around Kudz! Bursting into laughter is considered bad form.
*Tsk Tsk* they need to get Flicker up there.
8059000 It's hinted at via PTSSFFF and The Mask Makes The Pony. And Celestia was the one that wanted intercourse MORE i believe.
8059256
It hasn't been eleven months.
8058917 Not sure they've dealt with all the cakes Celestia likes
8058972 Always liked stories where you have the prim and proper meals, they also have informal meals
8058995 Thicker doors as well
I've been meaning to ask... what the hell happened after The Perilous Romance of Swans? Like how big is the time gap between that story and this one? I mean I read that Celestia, Luna and Goosling are getting engaged and then boom, I read this sequel and Seville is stabbed (dead?), Celestia is pregnant, changelings invaded, and then some freak accident happens that cause Luna and Goosling to get injured and put into the hospital... like wtf? did I skip a sequel or something? holy hell i'm confused... still.. great story.. i binged read the whole trilogy? bout to go binge red the rest of the weedverse, when i have the time
8059321
About two months. Seville is alive, as evidenced in other stories.
Princess Twilight Sparkle's School for Fantastic Foals has some of the details you seek.
So Flurry was alway great, good to know.
RIP Palace Kitchens.
If this is how she reacts to a single meal, a nation wide famine looms menacingly.
Then how do you know it's even pink?
Savage Flurry. Nobody is getting out of this dinner alive, except maybe Celestia.
No, wait, Celestia is going out by starvation.
Luna to choking.
Gosling (and the kitchens) to pregnant alicorn...
Theres another story that describes the fight in which Gosling gets hurt.
8059328
Thank you!
8059000
The story IS named "The Perilous Gestation of Swans". Gestation implies pregnancy. The story will primarily focus on Celestia's pregnancy, not getting pregnant. Otherwise we might have had "The Perilous Mating of Swans" in between. ... Which would be the title for a full story, and a full story based on Gosling getting his bill wet with the Sun Goddess might be a little much!
And so begins the dread cake famine.
8059009
The croutonity, O, the croutonity!
8059264 Jeebus, I forgot for a moment there that Cadance is pregnant too! I shudder to think what'll happen to the stallions in the castle if Raven and Blueblood are ALSO expecting!
8059588 Cadence died of embarrassment halfway through he meal, it just hasn't caught up with her yet.
8059009 Lemme tell a little sotry ´bout those dammed croutons.
Once uppon a time I was in a business dinner. And, after the first course, they served a bowl to all us with croutous. Except that I never saw croutouns before. So, yeah, strange food, strange dinner, best to not let everyone know how green I am on this business dinner thing. Let´s eat those things.
Eat then DRY. With a spoon. Oh, nevermind the strange looks of the others.
...and, then, came the soup.
Oh..
OH...
OHHHHHH...that´s why the bowl had that strange hard bread !
OHHHHHHHHHH...that´s why everybody was looking at me !!
OHHHHHHHHHHHHHH...I want to die, please !!!
8059135 8059164 8059262 Ah good point.
Wait... they got married????? The last time I was on Perilous Romance they were definitely not married. Daafuq did I miss?
Whiiich is kinda my problem with the weedverse. It's awesome, and god the worldbbuilidng is great, but it's really easy to miss something if you haven't gotten to every single entry :P
8059751 I know what gestation means... i just wish the introduction wa sa bit more gradual, but oh well.
8060067 yeah. Read PTSSFFF. The wedding was a major plot point.
8060069 Uh... what the hell does that stand for?
8060081 Princess Twilight Sparkle's School For Fantastic Foals
8060083 Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh
I had a stray thought.
Yeah, I know I said I was taking a hiatus, and I have been. My emotional state has been much improved these past couple days by not thinking about all this heavy stuff. Still, I thought I'd share while my thought was still warm.
I wondered sometimes if not being able to access the astral realm, on top of her relative inexperience, made Twilight feel like she was the lesser princess of the four. Then, I happened to be thinking about Cadance and realized that logically, her magic is the weakest of the four. Does she ever feel insecure next to the incredible feats her peers perform? And then there's Luna, the one who fell harder than any other a thousand years prior. Does she ever wonder if she has the right to stand next to the others, who could claim to be far more virtuous, at least in her eyes? And Celestia...well, I can't think of any issues she has that weren't covered by Perilous Romance.
That's it. I admit, there's not too much point to this, but I hope it was worth sharing all the same.
8060201
The truth is, each of the four princesses believes they are inferior to the others in some way. This has been hinted at quite a number of times throughout the series, with Celestia even thinking about abdicating so that Cadance and Twilight could rule. And, as its been shown, each of them has a strength unique to themselves, an individual approach that is entirely their own.
Cadance is competent and organised. Celestia is the chessmaster. Luna is the information specialist. Twilight has been shown to quite good at improvising, though it has never been explicitly stated. She operates on instincts and hunches, and while not always right, she's capable of rolling with the punches far better than her counterparts, picking herself up, and getting back into the scuffle.
Cadance? You can't beat her organisation. Celestia? The only winning move is not to play. Luna? Where do you think the darkness goes when it retreats from the light? Twilight? Twilight will schedule your ass beating, as well as additional time for the lecture that follows.
And those are just the princesses.
8060232
From this can we infer this is basic equinal psychology at work, or does it prove that all alicorns have some sort of deep emotional flaw system built into them from the beginning which holds them back in various ways?
8060253
They're still ponies. They have flaws, just like every other pony. Twilight has the same flaws that she had as a unicorn, more or less.