Her Honorableness has Confusing Motives

“The almighty Bubble Burst, great and powerful ruler of Burstopia, is approaching,” The Burstian Guard announced

Bubble Burst never grew tired of those words, nor did she grow tired of the way her subjects cowered at her hooves as she brushed past them.

Power, she thought, is a wonderful thing.

As Bubble Burst entered the throne room of her dark castle, those waiting for an audience with her bowed deeply. Only one pony remained standing.

“Hiya, Bursty!” Sunsketch trotted toward her, beaming. Bubble Burst grinned back at her long time friend.

“Hey Sketch,” she said warmly. “Wanna help me with my audiences?”

“Sure, why not?” the blue unicorn responded.

Together, they ascended to the platform in the front of the room. Bubble Burst sat on her orange throne, her light blue cutie mark emblazoned upon it. Sunsketch stood next to the throne, attempting to match her friend’s natural regal stance. The attempt was not successful, and she instead appeared simply more incompetent than usual. Bubble Burst stifled a chuckle at her bumbling friend, which was met with a fiery glare.

“First in line!” Bubble Burst called. Sunsketch gave up trying to look regal and plopped down in some form of sitting. The first to step forward was an elderly green earth pony. “Granny Smith,” Bubble Burst greeted. “How are things at Sweet Apple Acres?”

“Doin’ good, as always,” the elderly mare reported. “Ten percent of our zap apple crops ’ave been delivered to all yer stores, just as yah asked, yer Honorableness.”

“Thank you. See Twilight for your pay.” Bubble Burst waved a hoof to the purple alicorn that served as her banker, advisor, and librarian. A bag of bits changed hooves, and the next pony stepped forward. “Marshmallow!” The dictator enthused. The approaching white unicorn sighed, resigning to a nickname she hated.

“The gown you ordered is finished,” Rarity reported wearily, pulling a flowing silk dress out from behind her with her magic. “In just the shade of red you asked for, your Honorableness.”

Bubble Burst inspected the gown skeptically. “That is cherry. I asked for crimson. Like blood, Miss Rarity. Cinnamon is not blood. Cherry is not blood. I WANT BLOOD!”

Sunsketch shot her friend a concerned glance, then turned back to a glum looking Rarity.
“Would you be so kind as to redo it? Her Honorableness would be very grateful.”

“BLOOD RED IS BEST RED!” Bubble cried, stamping a hoof for emphasis. The staff ponies filling the room rolled their eyes collectively behind her back. They were altogether too used to their Honorable Dictator proclaiming things like this to be worried anymore. “NEXT!” Bubble Burst yelled, already tired of the seamstress before her.

A harassed looking yellow pegasus approached next, dragging a trio of three headed hounds behind her. Bubble cleared her throat, taking a moment to compose herself.

“And how are Dagger, Gore, and Guillotine?” Bubble Burst inquired.

“Just. Fine,” Fluttershy panted. Bubble Burst’s horn glowed and raw beef, dripping with blood, appeared in front of the canines’ noses. Fluttershy turned away, stifling a sob, as all nine heads greedily snapped up the meat.

“NEXT!” Bubble Burst called as Fluttershy exited. A pink mare bounced in, colorful balloons floating in her wake.

“Make sure my birthday party next month is totally epic, okay?” the unicorn on the throne said.

“Already taken care of!” Pinkie Pie was still bouncing.

Bubble Burst was pleased. “Great! Have a cupcake!” she exclaimed, using her horn to poof the fluffy pile of deliciousness into existence. Pinkie Pie downed it in one gulp, then bounced back the way she came. The dictator smiled. “This,” Bubble Burst declared, “Is fun.” Sunsketch grinned at her friend.

“Can I do it this time?” Sunsketch asked hopefully.

“Go ahead.” Bubble Burst mumbled through a mouthful of cupcake.

“NEXT!” Sunsketch screeched, and a rainbow-maned pegasus dashed in, screeching to a halt at the foot of Bubble’s throne.

“We captured her, just like you asked, sir.” Rainbow Dash reported sharply. Sunsketch turned a quizzical eye.

“Who is it this time?” She asked curiously.

“Bring her in.” Bubble Burst ordered, ignoring the unicorn beside her. “And I told you to call me ‘Your Honorableness’, Captain Dash, not ‘sir’.” A tall, black, cheese-legged creature was dragged in, hissing and spitting. The next order confused Sunsketch even more. “Put the Queen in the virtual reality room.” The orange unicorn commanded.

“How will she be punished si- Your Honorableness?” Rainbow Dash asked awkwardly. Sunsketch turned to her friend, silently curious.

“Who said anything about punishment?” Bubble Burst smirked. “Punishment is for ponies I don’t like. Chrysalis here is going to virtual reality, where she can drain as much love from virtual versions of her enemies as she wants!” Bubble
Burst beamed, obviously proud of herself.

Sunsketch shook her head. “But how would that even- You know what? Never mind. I never will understand you, will I?”

“Nope!” Bubble Burst shouted giddily. The two friends shared a smile.

“Well, that's over.” Bubble burst dusted off her hooves, even though the wasn't a single speck of dust in them.

“Remember what today is?” Sunsketch asked with a smile.

Bubble Burst squinted in thought for a moment, then brightened with realization. “I can't believe I almost forgot! It’s the ten year anniversary of Celestia’s banishment to the sun and the founding Burstopia! The banquet tonight! All that food!”

“Food is never far from your mind, is it?” Sunsketch grinned knowingly.

“Never! Bubble Burst beamed. “Let's go get ready.” The two friends exited the throne room, both envisioning the vast array of delicacies that awaited them.
---
An hour later, Sunsketch was knocking on the door to Bubble Burst’s private chambers. “Are you ready yet? I want to eat!” she whined.

“Mane. Won’t. Cooperate!” came the disgruntled reply. “Sketch help me!” Sunsketch opened the door to see her friend struggling to push a single stray hair into her otherwise meticulously perfect bun. Sunsketch gently pulled Bubble Burst's hoof away.

“Let me try.” Sunsketch’s horn glowed and the hair moved into place, only to spring back up immediately. Fifteen attempts later, Sunsketch was almost as upset as Bubble Burst. “It looks fine, can't we just leave it?”

“No.”

“Then where are the scissors?”

“Top drawer on the right.”

Snip

“Now are you ready?”

“For lots of food and forced admiration? Definitely.”

The two mares flounced out the door, laughing giddily as they went. Bubble Burst smiled happily as she opened the grand doors of her banquet hall, Sunsketch at her side.

Power may be wonderful, the dictator thought. But friendship is even better.

Author's Note:

A weird little story from my weird little brain and my first completed fan fiction. Story by Bubble Burst. Credit to Sunsketch for cover art and editing/proofreading. Please let me know what you think in the comments!

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Damaged

Damaged #1 · Jan 31st, 2017 · 2 · ·

This is one of the few stories I have read (few as in I don't read a lot on here, and few as in this is rare) on this site that earns its random tag. Really earns it. I could detect no plot whatsoever, but I still giggled in places. Keep working at writing, and don't ever stop the ideas from leaking out onto your keyboard!

SevenBubbles1000

SevenBubbles1000 #2 · Jan 31st, 2017 · 2 · ·

7910913 Thanks so much! The reason it's so random is that it's based on how Sunsketch and I act in real life. Some of my other stories that are in progress are a little more understandable than this one, but this one was really just for my own personal enjoyment.