Discord stared around at his surroundings in confusion. He had gone wandering around the edges of the Shivering Isles, home to himself and his Dad, and had stumbled across a bunch of doors that didn't actually exist. Always eager to discover something new, he hadn't hesitated to pop open one of the doors and duck through it. Unfortunately, as soon as he was through, the door vanished into total non-existence, leaving him with no way back. He wasn't too concerned, as he'd yet to encounter anything that actually hurt him, and was certain his Dad would come find him before he got in too much trouble...or possibly just after. Either way, fun.
His surroundings now discouraged him in that regard, however. He found himself wandering around a mountainous region covered in white ash. In the distance, he heard boisterous bellows alternating between rage and celebration, and the clash of steel. What made him more nervous was that none of the bellows sounded humanesque. While there weren't any true humans in the Shivering Isles, all the ones he'd seen in his high elevation explorations (Dad didn't want him meeting people freely until he was big enough to properly intimidate) were human in shape, and thus sounded humanesque in their range of noises. These sounded far more brutish.
Cresting a cliff, he found himself staring down at a scene of absolute chaos, completely washing away his unease. The creatures below were roughly humanoid in shape, but with much rougher grey skin with less refined features. The males appeared brutish, while the females appeared feral. All had teeth jutting up from their lower jaws over their upper lip, and all were fully armed and armored. They were in a constant flow of battling each other, drinking and feasting, and doing other things that Discord didn't fully understand but often wound up involving several males and females and resembled a different sort of fight. Some of those below were doing all these things simultaneously. While not the sort of thing Discord wanted to join in, it was certainly something he wanted a better look at. Coming out from behind the hill, he floated over the gathering for a better look.
Before he got far, he felt power seize him. He recognized the sensation as being similar to when his Dad's power gripped him, though this felt relatively weaker and focused very differently. He didn't know who had grabbed him, but his struggles showed him that - at least for now - they were much stronger than he. However, the power also seemed focused in such a way as to not hurt him, so he relaxed to see who was doing it...and how he could give them enough headaches to let him go.
The one that held him in their grip quickly became visible. He was another brutish figure like those below, at least visibly. In fact, he was visibly indistinguishable from those battling - and other things - in the valley save for a massive, bleeding wound in his chest that did not heal. However, Discord wasn't limited to visual identification, and plainly saw the aura of power that suffused his true being, the same aura that held Discord in its grip.
The creature stared at Discord for a time. "Hmm...you are not native to my sphere," he stated softly, his free hand clutching a steel sword as long as his body as the other balanced Discord in his power. "And you are not the sort of creature to take shape naturally in any land I am aware of. What sort of creature are you?"
"Dee Koh!" Discord proclaimed eagerly, wiggling his talons and claws to attempt to shape some chaos. A few butterflies appeared in the air over them, but they quickly dissolved. Discord pouted, not liking that he had so little power here, or in the grip of this one.
"Discord, hmm?" the creature mused. "I am Malacath. To where do you belong, little one?"
"Dada!" Discord declared, flicking himself in the chin and making his head do a flip in the air before landing back on his neck.
Malacath released his sword to stroke his chin thoughtfully. "I see..." he mused thoughtfully, his voice gravelly and echoing. "Plainly, you hail from one of the spheres. A creature such as you would either not last long or have drawn Daedric attention had you been amongst mortals. Tell me, what do you know of your Father's aspects?"
Discord thought for a time. He didn't know what an 'aspect' was, but he got the feeling this Malacath wanted him to describe his Dad. After a bit of internal debate, he figured out the one thing he could manage to say that he felt represented his Dad. "Cheese!"
Malacath groaned, rubbing his forehead. "Yes, you would be one of his, wouldn't you?" He sighed ruefully. "You call him Dad. Is he truly your father?"
Discord tilted his head, not understanding.
"Did he make you?" Malacath clarified.
"Nuh uh!" Discord proclaimed firmly. "He Dada!"
Malacath's eyebrow rose. "He...took you in?" At the nod from Discord, he frowned thoughtfully. "That seems...unlike him. But you do seem the sort that he would enjoy..." Shifting his sword to his back - where it stayed because he told it to - he lifted Discord into his arms. "Well, it would be best if you were returned to him. Assuming he remembers you, he is probably worried by now." Turning he walked off with the tiny chimera under his arm.
"But...but..." Discord yearned back to the gathering they were leaving. "Pah-tea! Pah-tea!"
Malacath blinked in surprise. "You...wish to join the revelry?" he asked, surprised.
Discord looked up at Malacath's size, then glanced at the size of the revelers, then at his own diminutive size before clambering up to Malacath's shoulder, clutching the sword hilt for balance. "Watch?" he asked hopefully. "Fun!"
"You feel no fear in the presence of the Orsimer?" Malacath asked in surprise. "Nor loathing?"
Discord blinked, processing the question. "Fee...ear? Low...thing?" He glanced around, then scooped up a rock, popped one of his ears off, and handed both to Malacath hopefully. "Now pah-tea?"
Malacath stared in amazement. "You who would be outcast and ostracized almost anywhere...you do not even understand the concept of fear and hate..." Taking the rock, he slipped it into a pouch at his waist, then reattached the ear to Discord's head. "I think I will speak more with Sheogorath after all, if only to keep this innocence of yours as long as possible."
"Dada! Dada!" Discord promptly forgot about the party at the mention of his Dad.
Sheogorath paced frantically across the entire Isles. "Where is he? Where is he? WHERE IS HE?" Structures collapsed and mountains sprang into existence from the power of his fretting, leaving even more madness in his wake than usual as plants burst into butterflies and insects bloomed before dropping fruit. Any other day, he'd have marveled at the sight of a fruit fly - a winged piece of fruit that spat juice and seeds to both defend itself and make more of itself - but all his focus was on his missing child.
"While it is surprising to see you carrying a single train of thought for so long, My Lord," Haskill offered diffidently, "it would perhaps be best if you calmed down somewhat. When we do recover the Young Lord, it would be best he had a home to return to, wouldn't it?"
"Do not tell me what to do, Haskill!" Sheogorath snapped, blasting the ground all around Haskill with a thought and leaving the poor chamberlain standing on a pillar in the center of a crater. "I am truly Mad right now, for my son has gone missing-" He paused as he felt a niggle at the edge of the realm. "What is that?"
Haskill quickly interpreted the message. "Lord Malacath desires entry, My Lord," he translated. Feeling another niggle, he smiled in relief. "It appears he has safely retrieved the Young Lord-"
Sheogorath immediately opened the gate between his realm and the Ashpit, allowing Malacath to materialize upon the Isles. At the sight of the creature clinging to Malacath's sword, he let out a whoop of joy and relief. "Discord, my son! There you are!" Rushing forward, he scooped the little creature into his arms, clinging to him tightly as the little chimera giggled happily. "Don't go wandering off again! I'll...I'll explode your head if you worry me like that again!"
Discord blew a raspberry at his father before sprouting a second head, which also blew a raspberry before exploding with a bang like a party popper.
Sheogorath laughed happily. "That's my boy!" His expression then shifted to deadly serious. "But seriously, no wandering off without at least leaving a note or something. Or no chocolate."
Discord's eyes went wide, and he whimpered sorrowfully.
"I mean it," Sheogorath insisted. "I was so worried about you I actually managed a coherent train of thought for a full hour! Don't do that to me again."
As Discord snuggled up to Sheogorath, Malacath smiled softly. "So you did take him in," he murmured softly. "That is...pleasing. He would be ostracized almost anywhere. Seeing him, I had thought only I would look past his appearance and welcome him-"
"I saw him first!" Sheogorath proclaimed petulantly, hugging Discord tighter. "Go get your own randomly appearing magical beast of reality rewriting! This one's my kid!"
Malacath laughed softly. "You might want to start escorting him around to the other realms," he suggested. "He seems determined to explore. He is welcome to visit the Ashpit. He seemed eager to see the 'party'."
"Pah-tea! Pah-tea!" Discord squealed happily, tugging on Sheogorath's tunic and gesturing at Malacath.
"What a marvelous idea!" Sheogorath agreed. "Malt Chocolate! You are welcome to our tea parties!"
Malacath's eyes narrowed. He didn't like the bastardization of his name, but it was Sheogorath. What could one do? Besides, the invitation from Discord was surely genuine. "I shall surely consider it."
Discord wriggled out of Sheogorath's embrace and floated over to Malacath. He looked at his mouth, then floated down to look in his wound. He shifted back and forth several times.
Realizing what he was attempting to inquire, Malacath rolled his eyes and decided to humor the child. Conjuring a mug of mead, he chugged it down, squirming internally as part of the drink spurted out the wound.
Discord and Sheogorath both burst into giggles and laughter, applauding the trick. Malacath blinked for a time...and smiled the first genuine smile he'd experienced since he took up the mantle of Daedra. Perhaps this wouldn't be so bad after all.
Aw geez, he's going to end up uniting at least half the Daedric lords isn't he? Wait, what am I saying, it's Discord. He'd likely make them all into a chimera at some point or another, on accident or otherwise.
7707575
.............Your kidding right? The Joker is pretty much a murderous psychopath. Discord is, at the most, a powerful prankster that finds killing people to be the ABSOLUTE OPPOSITE of funny. If anything, Discord would rather help BATMAN to PERMANENTLY take down Joker instead.
I want Discord to meet Azura next!
7720275
Exactly. As some other stories have used, life is chaos and death is the cessation of that chaos.
Warm fuzzy feeling from Malacath, the mortals of Tamriel would be shocked.
Very nice chapter, just the right mix of crazy and warm fuzzy feelings.
7720262 Check my suggestion post, I figure some will like him, some will grow to tolerate him, and some will curse his very name and try to kill him, only to have all the ones who like him come to his rescue.
Well that's an interesting development.
7720295
Thank you. And besides, the way I see Discord helping Batman permanently deal with Joker is when Joker is sent to Arkham, Discord uses his power to keep Joker there and suffer a series of pranks that he can never escape, dodge or out think.
I DEMAND FAN ART OF BABY DISCORD AND MALACATH NOW. THIS MUST BE DONE, GREAT GODS ABOVE!
I just want to see them prank the hell out of hermaeus Mora! He acts so stuck-up but i bet hes just as nerdy Twilight if not more so!
Cuuuute. Almost thought he wandered into Hircine's territory.
7720283 Nonono! Hircine! Or Mehrunes Dagon!
Well that was adorable, keep up the good work.
Guess Discord left his worries by the door.
I like how Discord was rocking a new ear there.
Seems Sheogorath is truly prepared for the mountainous task of parenting. Probably. He might make mountains out of molehills though
7720366 Probably literally as well as metaphorically. This chapter was cute, seeing others like this would be nice
7720406 Okay, maybe that is a bit extreme in hindsight
I like Malacath
7720300
Somehow I feel this is going to end up conceptually similar to Pinkie's story in that way.
I get the distinct feeling I'm going to like the next few chapters. Looking forward to more.
Keep up the great work. Deus tecum.
7720324 How about Nocturnal or Peryite- screw Peryite, he's the weakest of the Princes. Or Boethiah and Sanguine? On a side note, I wouldn't be surprised if Twilight became the next Hermaeus Mora, much like how Malacath and Sheo used to be mortal at one point. Tirek might as well be Mehrunes Dagon's mortal avatar and I still like the idea of Celestia and Luna having Daedric origins or being cousins to Azura.
I feel that Discord can relate to Sheo, Mephala and Azura.
As long as he doesn't take a visit to Mehrunez, the kid'll be fine. If he does, however, then he's in biiiiiig trouble. It's literally a Dagon thing that he claims anything that enters his realm, especially someone so... Impressionable.
And did anyone else think it was Hercine and his werewolves before they mentioned armor and weapons?
7720661 He may be one of the weakest princes, but damn does he give you the best artifact, Spellbreaker is one of the few deadric artifacts worth using in my experience, Hail Peryite!
7720735 Actually, the part about Celly and lulu being related to Azura came from a Skyrim crossover featuring anthro changeling as eventual co-Dragonborn, so it's technically not mine. Think about it: Twilight maybe the Element of Magic, but she's obsessed about books, checklists and the learning of magic, something that's under Herma Mora's sphere of influence.
If you compare Mehrunes Dagon's color scheme to Tirek's, I'd say that it's likely because Tirek wants to absorb magic and rule Equestria much like how Dagon caused the Oblivion Crisis by entering Nirn in his true form. It also helps that both Twilight and the Hero of Kvatch/Future Sheo never fight Tirek or Dagon until the fifth season finale/endgame. I guess Twilight's power increase enabled her to fight Tirek DBZ w/ magic, but I'd like to think that Martin turning into Akatosh and banishing Dagon is way cooler.
I can see some of the parallels between MLP and Oblivion and I remember a past comment from Sunset visits Skyrim where a guy mentions Kynareth's spirit animal being a unicorn. So, by that logic, any pony in Tamriel (especially unicorns) would be under Kynareth's employ or protection. And another thing, as cool as it is that Spike was raised by Samus, I'd like to see a story where he was raised by Paarthunaaax.
On the other hand, there's a crossover where Spike and Goku are brothers of all things. Eh, listen to me blab. I'll bet that I'm boring everyone already.
7720755 Spellbreaker's cool... if you have a mage set with the Block skill. My personal favorite is the Oghma Infinium. I've never used Dawnbreaker in any of my runs, but it's useful for slaying undead.
All this party needs now is Deadpool, Beetlejuice, and the Warner Siblings.
7720823 Dawnbreakers cool and all, but it is way too underpowered, espetially since you can't upgrade deadric atrifacts to legendary, even with max smithing as they can't benefit from a material perk, even without that, they are still weaker then most of the high tier weapons, I needed a mod to buff them just so they were worth the effort you have to go through to get them.
7720923 So it's a lower-tier weapon?
Way to go. You gave me diabetes from all the hnng in this chapter.
I'm not really that knowledgeable in the lore but... I wasn't expecting Malacath to be so compassionate. You know, given he is the war god (or how you'd call it) of the Orcs.
Still, greatly enjoyable
7720975
His actual title is "Patron of the Outcasts". He champions those who, in essence, don't fit in.
And you don't get much more 'not fitting in' than Discord.
7721061 Thanks for that, explains everything
What do you expect when he looks like that?
It's honestly great.
I love this fic.
Perhaps not.
7720945 more of a mid tier, like most deadric weapons.
Omg sheogorath is my favourite daedric prince and with discord in the mix plus being written by tatsurou this story looks great!
7720322 Wait your turn, there needs to be fanart of baby Discord, Sheogorath and Haskil first, then Malacath can have his turn.
7720300 Speaking of, perhaps Discord and Nocturnal could have epic games of hide and seek? Patron Daedric Prince of thieves vs the Lord of Chaos, tell me you wouldn't pay to see that.
7720491 Indeed. Debauchery at it's finest. Especially when you considered how Discord wanted to hang with Spike and Big Mac at first.
7720661 Now I imagine Twilight doing the Oghma Infinium quest...
epic chapter and i think Malacath would make a nice uncle for Discord.
i wonder when Sanguine, Nocturnal, Azura, Meridia, Mehrune Dagon, Molag Bal, Mephalla, Hircine, Hermaeus Mora (would like to see an epic prank on him which was mentioned in the comment section), Peryite, Boethiah will show up and how they woukd react to Discord..... oh did i miss one?
7721516 I do not think Sheogorath would let his son near Mehrune Dagon simply for the fact he is the lord of destruction.
...Okay, that was absolutely adorable.
7721516 well there is 17 and you've listed 11. Add She and Mal while minusing Jyg and that goes to13 with 16 total, I just can't remember what the others are.
7721621
yeah and if Mehrune Dagon should appear then i wager Sheogorath and probably Malacath as well (and maybe other Deadric princes that showed up that ends up liking Discord) will blast Mehrune Dagon to the Moon.... well their version of it at least.
probably blast Molag Bal to the moon as well.
7721669
found the remaing ones i missed. (checked uesp skyrim wiki)
Vaermina, Clavicus Vile and Namira.
7721061 Malaceth also bears the title of Keeper of the Sworn Oath and Bloody Curse. Still, I can see the God of the Orcs having a good time with little Discord...perhaps even allowing him to see that which lies in the centre of the Ashpits. Now, the other Princes? Sanguine would love him, but that guy loves just about anyone who shows him a good time. Hercine wouldnt care in the slightest as Discord doest hunt. Azura might like him..might not, hard to say. I think she still might be pissed at the Dwemer...
Meridia should be Discord's first crush.
... Aaaaaaaaaaand now I'm imaging Malacath as Chuck Norris.
... Give me a minute....
Ah!
"The Dunmer are not naturally dark-skinned, they are simply black and blue from Malacath's tests/beatings."
"The Backbone of Malacath's realm, Ashpit, is an actual backbone. Only Malacath knows what happened to the rest of the skeleton."
"The Dragonborn did not defeat Alduin. Malacath simply bitch-slapped the overgrown lizard because he was sick of all that shouting."
7722178
Okay, that is hilarious and awesome.
So is Macalath gonna get Pinkie?
7721905 Beware! If that happens, I WILL press the 'panic' button!!
7722732 I mean when he's older.
7723125
Dude, that thought didn't enter my mind until you mentioned it.
Now I'm stuck in the very worse part of the gutter, HELP!!!!
Daww
7721790
... I much rather he get blasted by a souless mortal again
7726404
There are some things money can't buy.
For everything else, there's Wabbajack.