Cloud Dream,a Pegasus who can't fly, is rejected from his home in Trottingham and came to Ponyville where he has heard of the six ponies that seem to continuously save Equestria. He has more specifically heard of two Pegasus, Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy, whom he feels can help him fly and achieve his dream of controlling lighting clouds.
Alright everyone, So since my first story didn't go over too well I'm going to try this one. If you read my other story (written in the stars, which i deleted) I appreciate constructive criticism not just "this sucks" so if that's all you're going to say about it, don't comment I will delete it.
Chapters (9)
Hope you guys like this one better than my other disaster
>romance tag
>oc
no just no
This was good! You did a good job developing your character and actually made it not a Mary-Sue on basically your first try!
Only a few grammar mistakes and great plot idea! Just needs a little bit of editing. Great job!
I epicly failed the first time...
742342
its only chapter 1 -.-
742342
its only chapter 1 -.-
742375
thank you so much :) I hope you keep reading for the rest
oh so tell me what will be the ship then?
742411
and ruin it? do you go to the end of the book and figure out the end after the first chapter?
742426
damn i'm going to assume its Cloud Dream x rainbow dash then
I don´t know why there are downvotes. It´s very well written and you are great at making things exciting!
Keep going! ^^
... You've improved soooooo much since the last chapter!
Great job! Keep it up!
746333
thank you so much <3
742342 And your problem is what? Just stop trolling other people who want to try something out. Rome wasn´t built in a day you know? -.-
Hi there.
a good start, but try to mix the beginning of your sentences up.
"His coat was a brilliant white... He had heard about the small town all his life... He heard some of...He especially wanted to meet the legendary pegasus pony who successfully created a Rainboom, and also represented one of the elements in the Elements of Harmony... He had heard all about the six ponies...
780241
Thanks, I've gotten that a few times now. I'll do my best
...I am speechless! You just keep getting better and better!
When I was reading Twilight's line 'Will he be okay, Doctor?' I thought of soap operas. 
YOU KEEP ON GETTING BETTER!!! AGGGGHHHH!!! *Ahem* Sorry... got a little overly excited...
I was thinking Trixie when that pony was at the poster. Two things... well three. 1: If he's the Princess's cousin and he's a prince, why isn't he an allicorn? B: I usually don't mess around with royalty related ponies... Just be careful. And 6: You have done an amazing job! Keep it up!
791308
You're so sweet thank you :D If you look back to episode 3 in season 1 when Twilight has the tickets to the gala Rarity talks about finding "him" and mentions she wants to meet Princess Celestia's nephew (oddly enough) and when they show him he's only a unicorn so i figured it'd be okay. I know it's rocky ground to mess with royalty but I do my research :)
>> BlueHibiscus Oh yeah! Good. Just wanted you to know! Keep up the good work!
Also, how do you do that >> thing?!
792185
I dunno, the site does it automatically for me :D
Wierd...
oh wait let me guess he got his cutie mark
1077793
Hold your horses geez :D DOn't spoil it.
oh sorry 1079656 that was not my intention
1079771
Haha it's cool, it is pretty obvious
thats why i said it hehe :)
Touching personally I don't like mane six x mane six its way to weird too me thats why I like this fic
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