Daylight Finds You
Crystal stared at the freshly made bed, her lips curling into a sneer at how it mocked her. A small victory, she called it, as though that was supposed to mean something. What good were tucked sheets and a folded comforter when she was alone?
In a fit of anger, her magic tore the sheets from their resting place and mussed up the whole bed. The comforter ended up halfway on the floor, the pillows rested askew at opposite corners, and the sheets twisted around themselves like windswept debris.
There. Now her bed looked as awful as she felt. How was that for a small victory?
Her tail lashed while she stormed her way out of the bedroom. She was angry. She was sad. She was angry that she was sad. All she wanted to do was just stay in bed and sleep until Silent came home, but whatever bit of rational thought she had held onto managed to urge her to do otherwise.
Bills had to be paid. It was a pathetic excuse to keep moving in the grand scheme of things, but it worked nonetheless. At least enough to get her out of bed.
What came after that? A shower? Right. A shower and then breakfast. That was how normal life went, and that was what she would do.
The hot water was a temporary comfort, a warm hug that eased the tension in her muscles. But when the shower was over, all she was left with a bitter cold that soaked in all the way to her bones. Drying out her mane was a tedious chore and no matter what she did, there was no volume to it. The blonde and pink locks were more like a blanket draped listlessly over her head.
Oh, what was the point? She had no plans to go out, so she dropped the brush onto the counter and contemplated makeup. That also seemed like a useless endeavor, so she just turned away and left the idea of primping for mares who cared. She certainly didn't. She would just have some breakfast, work on her novel, and eventually go to sleep to start the whole pointless process all over again the next day.
Her stomach, however, refused to cooperate when it came time to pick something to eat. Nothing seemed appetizing. She didn't want anything in the pantry or the fridge, and she most certainly didn't want to go out. Was she even hungry at all? A churning, twisting sensation deep within said no—no, she most certainly was not.
Crystal snorted as she turned away from the kitchen and dragged herself onto the couch. It was fine. Breakfast was just one meal out of several. Perhaps lunch would be a better time. For now, however, she was going to write.
Or so she told herself. Hours slipped by at an agonizingly slow pace. She tried lying on the couch, sprawling on the rug, sitting on the bed, and even pacing with her notebook levitating in front of her. There was no muse, no inspiration, no spark of creativity at all. A part of her wondered if she'd ever had any of it at all, or if she had simply gotten lucky a few times and that wellspring had dried up.
A whimper bubbled up and she clenched her eyes shut. Her notebook fell to the floor with a despondent thump, followed by silence. The lack of sound was slowly filled with a buzzing noise.
Recently, she had come to the uncomfortable revelation that silence wasn't actually silent. Something was always lurking, ready to fill her ears with noise that didn't exist. If she didn't know any better, she would have thought she was going insane.
Crystal's eyes snapped open and she glared down at the notebook. Going insane! Her? After hardly a few days alone? What sort of weak-willed mare was she to be so lost after so short a time?
No, she refused to be a wilting flower. She would stand tall. She wouldn't succumb to things like this. She…
She was crying.
"No, no, no," she mumbled, nearly hitting herself from how quickly her hoof flew to wipe the tears away. "Don't be a stupid filly."
The harder she fought, the weaker she felt. A shudder seized her muscles and she dropped down to the floor as a sob racked through her very core. The anger was lost to a wave of self-loathing, which receded rather suddenly back into an ocean of grief.
How long would he be gone? How long was she supposed to do this? Would it ever get easier? Why hadn't she been prepared for this?
A heavy knock resounding in the silence snapped her out of the suffocating thoughts. She quickly wiped her eyes and called, "One moment!"
Before she opened the door, she practiced smiling a few times until she was satisfied. The forced turn of her lips grew sincere when she saw the mare standing at her doorstep. "Painted?"
"Hi, darlin'!" Painted Wave grinned. "Hope I'm not dropping in unannounced at a bad time."
Crystal shook her head. "Not at all!" She stepped to the side and gestured her in. "I would say you couldn't have shown up at a better time."
Painted set a full satchel by the door and whistled as she looked around. "Nice place you've got here! But since it's named after you, that's not much of a surprise."
"Named after me?" Crystal blinked, then laughed and waved a hoof at her. "Oh, don't be silly. The Empire was named such a long time ago."
"Semantics!" Painted plopped down on the couch, stretching out and propping her head up with one forehoof. Her expression shifted to a soft, somber smile. "He volunteered, didn't he?"
Crystal's jaw tightened and her gaze darted away. "Yes," she replied in a more delicate voice than she intended. She sucked in a quick breath to try to regain composure.
"You don't have to act like that with me." Painted sat up and patted the space beside her. "Why don't you sit down and tell me about how you're doing?"
"I—" Crystal gave a quick shake of her head. "I haven't offered you tea yet. Would you like some?"
With a light snort, Painted patted the cushion again. "I'd like for you to treat me like a friend and not a guest."
Crystal resisted for a moment longer, then relented by walking over and taking a seat. "I don't see why I should treat a guest better than a friend."
"I didn't hop a train for tea time." Painted wrapped a foreleg around Crystal's shoulders. "I came to make sure you were doin' all right, among other things."
It was hard to keep her voice even, but she did her best. "What other things?"
"All in due time, Mrs. Deflecting Wishes." Painted's voice lowered to a soft, soothing tone as she continued, "You're a newlywed mare whose husband has volunteered for war. You think a fake smile is going to fool me? Really? I'm almost insulted."
Her best wasn't good enough. "I—I don't—" All at once, the tears returned in full force and fell down her cheeks while she blubbered through a response. "I don't want to in-inconvenience you aft-after you came all this wa-way!"
Painted pulled her close and hugged her, one hoof stroking her back. "Shh, shh. It's okay. This is what I'm here for. Why don't you just cry a bit and then we'll talk?"
It was an easy suggestion to follow. Crystal buried her face against Painted's neck and cried the tears she wanted to hide. Wanted to pretend weren't there. "It d-doesn't change anything to cry," she muttered bitterly.
"What?" Painted pulled back and held Crystal by her shoulders at foreleg's length. "What did you just say?"
Crystal sniffled and averted her gaze, ears folding back. "It doesn't change anything to cry."
One of Painted's brows arched, then she withdrew her hooves to fold them over her chest. "Well, that's a load of ponyfeathers. Of course it changes something. Just look at you—your eyes are red and puffy. That's a pretty noticeable change, I'd say."
"Ohh…" A small laugh sputtered past Crystal's lips and she lightly pushed Painted. "I don't mean like tha-that."
With a small grin, Painted nodded. "I know. But look, it made you laugh." She sighed and leaned back into the couch, her eyes closing halfway and her head tilting back. "I'm not going to sugarcoat it. Things aren't going to get easier. It's only been a few days, for Celestia's sake. This is a lot to take in and a tiny sum of days isn't nearly long enough to adjust."
Painted lolled her head to the side to look at Crystal with a somber frown. "I can't promise that you'll feel better in a week. It might take a month. But you're tough under that pretty little face, and you know what? It's okay to cry. It's better than bottlin' it up and making a hard situation even harder."
"But—" Crystal bit her lower lip and hesitated a moment. "But what good does it do? What good does any of it do? Crying won't keep him safe!"
"Not crying won't, either, now will it? So what harm in there is crying?" The frown lifted into a small smile. "You feel better without all that negative energy in your chest, don't you?"
Crystal blinked a few times. She couldn't deny it: the tension had relieved. The feeling that she was going to fall apart wasn't gone, but it wasn't at the forefront of her mind. She relented with a small, meek nod. "Actually, I do."
"Exactly. Crying is your body's way of making room for other thoughts and feelings to have a chance to breathe. Quit suffocating yourself." Painted paused to let her words settle in before she nodded, her magic lighting up and pulling the large satchel open. "Now, if you're up to it, I have two other reasons why I'm here."
"Oh, of course." Crystal wiped her eyes and put on her best sincere smile. "What are they?"
A stack of cards and an object wrapped in cloth lifted into view, floated over, and lowered onto the coffee table. "First thing's first." Painted took Crystal's hooves in her own. "I wanted to let you know as soon as I could. I'm going to be traveling for work for a while and won't have my art supplies with me."
Crystal tilted her head. "Traveling? Really?" Her ears wiggled with interest. "Are you going somewhere fun?"
"Fun?" Painted snorted. "I wish. It's going to be a bunch of business stuff in a couple places. I'll be lucky if I'm not bored into old age by the time it's all over."
"Well, that's unfortunate to hear. But I suppose business isn't always glitz and glam for an artist." After a pause, she added in a quieter voice, "So you'll be gone quite a while by the sounds of it, then?"
Painted nodded, and her magic brought over the stack of cards. "Yeah. I don't know exactly how long, but I know you're working on a new novel so I wanted to make sure you weren't left high and dry when it's done. I have some business cards for a couple artists whose work I think you might like."
Crystal's heart sunk just as low as her ears drooped. Painted was the artist she had worked with since she had the freedom to choose one outside of Reindom House's art team. They had worked together on covers and promotional materials, but beyond that, Painted was a dear friend.
The idea of another artist being in charge of her covers felt wrong somehow, but she forced herself to nod. "You didn't have to, but I appreciate that you did. It won't be the same without your creative genius, though."
A grin tore across Painted's muzzle. "I know, but you'll manage. Just make sure to save a copy of it for me when it's done, all right?"
"Absolutely!" Crystal nodded again, more emphatic this time. "I wouldn't dream of doing otherwise!"
Painted laughed. The sound quieted as she turned her head to survey the room, her gaze taking in the full sight of it. "I wish I could have done this sooner given the circumstances, but I've also got a late housewarming gift for you."
"A housewarming gift? Oh, no, no, Painted, it's absolutely fine, we don't—I don't—" The words became trapped in her throat and she struggled against a surge of emotion. Whose home was it now? It was still 'we' and 'our', wasn't it? Of course it was!
Raising a hoof to stop her and levitating the wrapped item, Painted shook her head. "Just let me do this, all right? I brought it all this way just for you." She smiled. "I know you're surrounded by 'em on all sides here, but I wanted you to have one that had a bit more to it than just a shiny polished surface."
With a soft rustling sound, the bindings on the foreleg-length bundle unraveled and layers of thick cloth were pulled back, one by one. The rustling sound became a soft hum and when the last bit of cloth was unwrapped, the light in the room seemed to shift around the many facets of a single white crystal.
The breath Crystal had held disappeared suddenly in a soft gasp. She had seen it many times hanging over Painted's easel, sparking to life under the guidance of iridescent magic to create wonderful works of art.
Ripples of magic that kept the crystal aloft passed through the facets and, within the center, transformed into a rainbow of all shades and hues that danced among each other, swirling and leaping together but never muddying.
Painted watched the shifting colors for a moment before her gaze darted back to Crystal. The soft smile on her face grew into a beam and a firmness entered her voice as she said, "This is now yours. It has spent a good long while singing to me while I create, and now it will sing for you as you do the same. Put it somewhere where it'll catch the sun and it'll sing even louder."
There was a long pause as Crystal just tried to get her thoughts back on a mental path. This was no ordinary crystal. No, this was something cherished, something important, and not something to be given away as a simple housewarming gift.
Crystal's brow furrowed as she met Painted's gaze, uncertainty facing off against resolution. "Are you… sure? Painted, this—this is too precious for me to take like a bottle of wine or a set of cutlery!"
Painted's beaming smile quirked into an askew grin. "Mind's already made up. I'm not changin' it." She stood from the couch and started toward the door. "So—catch!" The crystal whistled as the iridescent magic chucked it in Crystal's direction.
It spun around in a slow trajectory, but fast enough for Crystal to squeak in surprise. She caught it in her own magic before it got too far, and she squeaked again when it seemed to react to her aetherial touch. An array of swirling ribbons in every shade of pink imaginable overtook the full-spectrum rainbow within the crystal.
While she was captivated by the sight, she was moved to tears by the harmonic chime that resonated through the air, a bittersweet yet perfect combination of hope and melancholy. It was almost as though the crystal, touched by her magic, reflected her soul.
Emotions swelled in her chest as she looked up at Painted and stammered, "I-I, I can't, Painted…"
Painted tossed her satchel over her back and winked. "Yes, you can. I know you can. It's yours now. Treat it and yourself with love, all right? I've got a train to catch, so don't make me late by arguing."
Her chin trembled, but she smiled and nodded. She got up from the couch and hurried over to embrace Painted in a tight hug. "A-All right. But when you get back, I'll return it to you."
"We'll see about that." She placed a soft kiss on Crystal's forehead. "Take care, sweetie. Remember what I said."
Crystal nodded again. "I will… I promise." She took a step back and inhaled deeply to regain her composure. "Have a safe trip."
And with that, Painted disappeared from view when the door closed behind her, and Crystal tried to be strong. Doubt and worry plagued her mind. Was Painted off to the war? Why would she be? There was no need for artists in a war!
Crystal had to know. She threw the door open and ran out to catch her before she could get too far, but Painted was nowhere in sight. Her eyes darted to spy a guard going one way and a large, shaggy grey mare going the other.
A lump formed in her throat, but she smiled as she retreated back inside. It must have been just as painful for her to leave as it was for Crystal, so she had already fled. Slowly, she slumped to the floor under the weight of uncertainty.
We'll see about that. What ominous parting words. She couldn't shake the feeling of worry that clouded her mind. First her husband, then her sanity, and now her friend? What else would the war take from her?
Crying didn't change anything… but Painted said it was okay to cry, and so she did.
There will be time on this journey
All you'll see is darkness
Out there somewhere daylight finds you
If you keep believing
If you have enjoyed this story so far, please consider taking a look at Anzel and my's website QuillnBlade.com for extra content such as mini stories, an Ask Us form to submit questions, responses to said questions, and special rewards for the awesome folks who support our Patreon.
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How are you doing that? I started my journey with Quill & Blade on Anzel's side, finding your work a captivating and sweet addendum. Now I am beginning to feel the flow of your stories as even more appealing... The emotions seem more vivid, the nuances of love look more alluring... This delicate, fragile, uncertain anticipation is just... just... Gah, stop playing tricks on my mind, woman!
Nobody dare drop Crystal Wishes a hint because of the "Trials", do you hear me? I want to see some anguish of dubiety for the sake of my mental well-being.
I APPROVE OF THIS CHAPTE--Okay, I'm biased, but screw it, WELL DONE SOULBAE <3
Poor Crystal I wish you had more friends in your new home, go have tea with Cadance.
7139987 Ugh, this is just so fitting. The chapter together with song just reminds me of this one evening, around 3 years ago, me sitting on a bench with my grandmother in front of her dacha, just listening to the song and to her talking about how my grandfather had to go to war against germany (i.e. my other grandfather) and how glad she was when he came back home to her.
Damn you Crystal Wishes for making me feel so warm and fluffy! :D
I'm guessing painted was recalled for government work. If she was volunteering, she would have said so, I think.
I get that this whole "war " thing is very traumatizing for Equestrians, but at the same it it's only been a few days. I feel like Crystal would still be in the denial stage. He'll, Silent probably hasn't even left Equestria yet. He's likely to be sitting around some depot for the next month and a half until the clerks can figure out what pen to use to fill out the paperwork. Ah, the military.
7139956 Oh, don't you worry. Where Anzel skipped a year, we will only skip a few months here and there. You will get your well-being pleasure.
7139974 akjhthrt Thank youu
I'm so glad you liked the scene ;~;
7140003 That sounds like a pretty good idea ;D Hmm
7140052 I'm happy to deliver!
7140070 Who knows!
7140097 No one goes through the stages in the same order, at the same rate, etc. Crystal has lived a sheltered life where very little has gone wrong.
This is... without a doubt in my opinion... your best chapter of anything I've read from you Crystal. It resonates like the gift Painted gave...
7140110 Yeah, that's quite clear.
7140110
I do hope so. And I am expecting only the most exquisite writing from you, Crystal. For I know well that you can deliver.
Impress me. Impress us all.
7140124 Ahhh, thank you so much. That means a lot to me. It's a major moment in Crystal's life, so I want to make sure it's represented properly.
7140127 I'll make sure in the future that characters wait the requisite number of days before going into an emotional state for ya.
7140133 I'll do my best!!
Anger provides a power boost?
Hello propaganda campaign.
7140137 :3 I shared these thoughts with you; now I will share them here. They are my reasons for appreciating this chapter massively.
The thing about Hopes thus far is that Crystal's life has really become a reflection of Silent. Her thoughts and actions have really mirrored what has been going on in his life -- to the point where, here , she straight up wonders if she ever had a creative spark. It appears snuffed out by the weight of Silent's war. Then Painted shows up with a gift that can resonate with her own magical energy and sing. Perhaps this is the point where things begin to rebound.... as the gift is the perfect metaphor for looking at one's own magic. It literally gives the ability to appreciate magic in a way in which Crystal is not accustomed. The gravity of the scene was also something we haven't really seen before. The chapter, frankly, was decidedly different than the others. It still had the Crystal butter effect, but there was something else wandering about -- something that screams, "This chapter is important. Remember me."
this is another good chapter filled with emotion, you are good at conveying that.
keep up the good work.
did i mention it was good?
Just like Trials, this has Bad End written all over it. I swear, Crystal Wishes, if you make me cry, I'll never forgive you!
No, that's mean... ok, I'll forgive you, but I'm going to make you wait at least a day!
Crystal... why do you do this to us? Why?!? I can only imagine how things are going to go once she learns of the Harmony.
img.buzzfeed.com/buzzfeed-static/static/enhanced/webdr05/2013/4/25/17/anigif_enhanced-buzz-26703-1366924828-0.gif
There is no escape from the feels...
I would go on a really long rethoric about this chapter here, but there's no way I can word my thoughts about it as eloquently as this entire chapter was.
Whether that makes sense or not (because sometimes I don't make sense) I'm giving this my highest praise.
For a simple visit to be so powerful, this is an outstanding chapter.
WAAAAAAAAAAH!
My feels. You hit them. Awesome chapter. But sad. Very sad.
oh my gaud!!!!
WHYYYYY THE FEEEELLLLSSSS
This was a simply amazing chapter and wait for the next! Are you going to have a 1 year later thing as well like SN did? Or are you going to havve some connecting story in between? I CAN'T WAIT TO FIND OUT!
7140097 Yeah, seems like we always end up waiting for the civies to find that god damn pen or something
Then they try to tell you that the paper work has been delayed and I just give them the "Are you shitting me?" look and its all good
So, is Painted actually off to the war? And more importantly, does she have a spare?
It still amazes me how well you and Anzel's stories complement one another. It very much reflects your characters themselves. Anzel's writing is direct, to the point, and free of prevention much like Silent himself, and your writing is so emotional, flowery, and descriptive, just like Crystal. So this was a dang good chapter.
Maybe one day I'll run out of good things to say about y'all, but that day is not today.
7140154 I think anger always provides a power boost! Adrenaline, baby!
7140160 Good comment! You're doing really good. Have a good day!
7140206 Hmm... Well, I can't make any promises one way or the other...
7140227 It's definitely going to be an exceptionally monumental event.
7140249 I'm really thrilled folks enjoyed this chapter so much. It's an important one, as Wing caught onto, and I wanted it to have the effect it's had, judging by the comments.
7140275 I can't even apologize, either! I'm just not sorry!
7140322 Stay tuned! All shall be revealed in due time!
7140438 I can't imagine what role she'd fill at the war beyond "Crystal overreacts to most everything"
7140550 Thank you!!
Yes, I definitely try to write Wishes and Hopes from inside Crystal's head. She is quite the emotional mare, and though I hope it doesn't get annoying to read, I do try to make sure that shows through in the story.
7140154
My thoughts exactly.
Way to go Painted!
I think I know what she meant with
As others said before me, this chapter may only just be "Painted just dropping by, and dropping some stuff off" but it's really a strong chapter that speaks volumes emotionally.
And while we're on the topic, what a roller-coaster of emotions Crystal had here.
Be looking forward to more, this is really a subject I can't help but feel derserves a the light you shed on it
How long will he be gone?" A question asked time and time again by the military spouse... I have to say this chapter was a feels trip, and Painted is acting her surely self, but I think crystal needed painted's viewpoint. And that was a really touching thing, giving up her crystal to crystal like that. I cant wait for the next chapter.
Of all the ponies to show up, Painted was about the last one I expected.
Great chapter nonetheless, very emotional.
7140660 Oh snap. I didn't think of that. I don't know how the war is going, but if Equestria thinks that its citizens might be particularly vulnerable to being swayed even a little bit...
Wahahahaaaaaa! *sob*
My feels....and...is that a reference, I see, to Phil Collins' "Look Through My Eyes" in the chapter title? That's one of my favorite songs!!!
This story has 'impending doom' written all over it.
7141187 Nailed it!
Ah yeah it is understandable what Crystal Wishes is going through right now. She is in a real slump that she needs to get out of. Good thing Painted Wave was there to help. This reminds me of what families of deployed soldiers experience. Eventually, in about a month, the family fully adjusts and moves forward. I know it may be difficult for Crystal, but I'm sure she will adjust to it. Its going to be a bit of an effort, but I think she will turn out all right.
The wisdom that Painted gave to Crystal will definitely help her cope with her husband's absence.
Will the time skip in Trials happen here, too?
I really liked this chapter - I've been feeling emotional and squishy-hearted lately and this was a slightly-happy-melancholy cherry on top that both brightened my spirits and... made my heart squishier? Hmm. Oh well.
I want to make jokes and witty comments, but this chapter... I can't, in good conscience, do it!
I'm totally not out of witty-isms, it's just all consideration for the ambience!
Oh, wow. Yeah... Such an evocative sequence of emotion. And one that I know well, so... Realistic.
/hug Crystal
EDIT: Poof goes the Velvet!
7142004
/salute for accurate comment XD
7140640
And the next time I'm serving cake, you can't have seconds!
7140825 Oh, yeah? Well, we'll see about that, in regards to you thinking you know what she meant by we'll see about that!
I like to think that some of the simplest moments (someone dropping by, dropping stuff off) can be profound in how they affect us. And judging by the comments I think I captured that sentiment successfully!
7140847 With the mantra Crystal's been repeating, I think "It's okay to cry" is a good replacement. It's not healthy to bottle things up!
7140878 Surprise Painted Wave Attack!! It's super effective.
7141023
7141187 You are correct! Painted picked the song for this chapter given the guest star.
7141402 Oh noes!
7141444 It definitely is not an easy adjustment, especially not the first time it happens. But there are ways to get through, and having friends to be there for you is but one of them.
7141712 Yup!
7141806 You should probably see a doctor about that squishy heart, I don't think that's a normal thing!
Hopes and Trials will not follow the same path of timeskips.
7142004 Well, now I know I did something right if you[/o] can't joke around (too much)! Yeah. The sentiment you quoted is one I'm familiar with, too.
7143080 Yeah thats true, I know that one from personal experience.
i was gonna ask about the time skip in triles happaning here but that was already answered
so im just gonna leave a
here and wish you a good day
That sounds like a very important gem.
I feel like this'll be the last time we see painted.
Not necessarily because she dies or anything, this just felt kind of like she's being put on a bus. Hope it isn't a trend.
I missed commenting before a new chapter went up!
Geeze, good thing for Painted Wave, because holy crap was that day going badly.
Much better.
Now that's kind of suspicious. Calling it now, Painted is a secret alicorn and has secret alicorn business to attend to.
Okay, maybe not.
I vote Rossby.
Ooo, now that's a present.
That was a pretty helpful visit, probably more helpful than Velvet's to be honest.
Hmn, I'm kind of liking my secret alicorn theory.
Old story but I thought it was funny that my phone buzzed almost immediately after I read this:
The lack of sound was slowly filled with a buzzing noise.
XD XD XD
Sweet Celestia, if only Crystal knew how many grypons Silent (dread) Knight had to kill to get home to his wife.
*Reads a lot more chapters ahead* oh, that's how
Yesterday it was bed, shower, make-up and breakfast.
Velvet gave voice to her anger, Painted, her denial. She's going to need those connections to keep her grounded.
But... it's going to get worse, before it gets better.
And with that, Painted disappeared from view when the door closed behind her, and Crystal tried to be strong. Doubt and worry plagued her mind. Was Painted off to the war? Why would she be? There was no need for artists in a war!
.......Oh but there is, they all are artists, it's a terrible, morbid, and disturbing art...one that I can't pretend to comprehend....terrible, such a terrible art indeed.
Painted isn’t, but Grey Maelstrom is. Oh, the foreshadowing is great here.