Right Where I Belong
Keep moving forward. That had been Crystal's mantra all morning. Don't stop, don't think, don't do anything except find a way to keep moving forward. As long as she did that, she was fine.
Definitely don't dwell on the fact that Silent was still in Equestria. Or how she'd been plagued by nightmares and terror when he wasn't even in danger. Or how she wasn't sure how she was going to get through the next week… month… two months… How long would he be gone?
Crystal shook her head and lightly slapped a hoof to her cheek. Stop thinking. Keep writing.
The royal stable was beautifully built, with intricate stonework and cobblestone floors. The sheep poked their heads through the slats of their stalls to peer at Shepherd, some curious, others wary. He spied a couple barrels set against one wall that, upon closer inspection, were filled with—
Pausing a moment to consult the book she had borrowed on raising sheep, she frowned. The diet of sheep consisted mainly of plants. Would those be stored in a barrel? Did they eat oats? She needed to consult a shepherd on the matter.
That interruption was all it took to throw her off course. The quill levitated above the page, waiting for instructions that never came. Her mind was blank again.
She groaned and rubbed at her eyes. Was it time for a break? Perhaps she could just lie down and close her eyes. Not sleep, of course—just rest for a moment. She scooped up her writing supplies in her magic and moved them over to the coffee table so she could stretch out on the couch.
A feeling of relaxation and numbness soothed her body into a comfortable state. The edges of her worried mind dulled. Her eyelids felt heavy, but she tried to keep them open just a little while longer.
What if she just slept until he came home? That would be fine, wouldn't it? Then she wouldn't have to keep herself busy. And it was so comfortable to just put her head down and close her eyes…
The lock jiggled before clicking into place, and the door creaked open. She jerked her head up, freezing when she saw Silent Knight standing there.
"Silent?!" She scrambled to her hooves and tried to jump off the couch, but there was no floor; instead, she fell.
Silent remained at the doorway that now hovered above her, growing further away as she plunged into darkness. She could do nothing except fall and watch the distance between them grow, a scream trapped in her throat. He just stared, making no effort to save her, his expression blank and void of emotion.
"Wake up," a voice thundered in her ear and her body seized up before it felt like she hit the cushion.
Her heavy breathing was the only sound she could hear for a moment until a pounding heartbeat overtook it. No, no, no! She wasn't supposed to fall asleep, and this was exactly why.
That voice, though… It was familiar, and not just because it had been in her nightmares last night and the night before. Or was that familiarity just a figment of her imagination, too?
It didn't matter. What mattered was she no longer allowed to close her eyes. She couldn't be trusted with not falling asleep, and one nightmare per day was more than enough for her.
Her magic snatched her notebook and quill. Keep moving forward. The stablehoof story wasn't holding her interest at that moment, so it was time to work on The Desert Rose.
What did she have so far? A protagonist and her family, a setting, and a vague idea of a plot that ended with the protagonist accepting she didn't want a romance. Velvet was right… How was she going to sell that to her readers?
Perhaps if there was still romance, but it didn't directly involve Fatinah. Crystal's ears perked up and she started to take notes. That could work! Fatinah could help her sister or a best friend find love, and through those efforts learn more about herself.
Crystal jotted down the final thought before she smiled with satisfaction. Finally! Progress! Now all she needed to do was—
Knock knock, knock knock.
—not panic. Unfortunately, her heart didn't get the memo and it went off to the races without her. What if she had just fallen asleep again? A trembling hoof reached out to test the ground. It was solid. A second hoof followed it, then a third, then the fourth.
She was standing. That was a good start. Taking a step forward brought her closer to the door instead of just walking in place. So far, so good.
Knock knock.
Oh, right, she hadn't said anything. "Coming!" she tried to call, but her voice was a raspy mess. Her vocal chords must have forgotten how to work, given that she hadn't spoken aloud since the lunch with Cadence.
When she pulled the door open, her suspicion that she was dreaming was confirmed as far as she was concerned. Princess Luna was standing on her welcome mat.
"Hello, Crystal." And she was speaking.
Crystal just stared at first, then looked around. She was still in the Crystal Empire, right?
Princess Luna laughed softly and shook her head. "You are not dreaming. May we come in?"
"We?" Crystal squeaked. Had Luna reverted to her old manner of speech?
"Yes, we," came a voice from out in the hall. Luna stepped inside so that a pegasus mare could follow her: Willowy Tempest, her personal aide. Right at her heels were two house guards, Miley Hooves coming inside and the other taking up position at the door.
Crystal didn't quite recognize the second guard, a delicate-looking unicorn with a dark blue coat under her armor. She did, however, know the lieutenant's pin the mare wore. This was Luna's new House Guard commander—Silent's replacement.
"Oh, right. Of course!" Crystal smiled. "Hello, Willow, Miley. Would any of you like some tea?"
Luna stopped in the middle of the room and took a moment to look around. Miley was doing her very best to stay professional and remain two paces behind the princess, but she did sneak in a smile and a wave before resuming her serious expression.
While Luna surveyed the surroundings, Willow cleared her throat and said, "No, but thank you. We don't plan to be here very long. Isn't that right, Princess?"
"You have made a lovely home here, Crystal," Luna said in an absent tone. "Your walls are bare, however."
Crystal flinched when Luna's gaze landed on her. The weight of it was too much to bear and she felt compelled to lower her own to the floor. "I—"
The weight grew heavier. Was Luna somehow forcing her into honesty? Or was it her own loneliness that made her want to tell the truth?
Telling even a simple white lie seemed impossible with Luna staring at her so intensely. In a quiet voice, Crystal admitted, "I want to wait until Silent comes home so we can pick pictures to put up together."
Luna hummed thoughtfully. "I see."
When Crystal glanced up, she saw Luna's gentle, motherly smile looking back at her. "Luna?"
"Willowy is right. We will not be here very long, and neither will you." Luna put a hoof on Crystal's shoulder, interrupting her before she could say anything. "I am here to take you home."
"Home?" Crystal glanced between the hoof, Willow, Miley, and Luna. "I don't understand. I am home."
"I told you she'd say that," Willow mumbled, shaking her head.
Luna's eyes grew soft and she gave the shoulder a squeeze. "I will not allow you to remain here without support. I have been blind enough already to the suffering of those close to me. That is why I will not allow you to endure yours alone."
Crystal sucked in a breath and held it to keep from betraying the surge of feelings that rose up from Luna's words. Instead, she forced the best smile she could manage. "But I—Luna, with all due respect, I don't…" She trailed off, looking away and over at the couch. "I don't want to leave this place. This is the home Silent and I made, even if it was only a short time."
"So you plan to remain here with your nightmares?" Luna inclined her head to put it in Crystal's line of sight. The crease between her furrowed brow seemed almost pained. "I cannot save you every night."
"Save me? What do you—" Crystal's eyes went wide as it clicked into place. The voice. The figure. The strange sense of familiarity. "It was you?"
With a small nod, Luna replied, "It was, but I have many ponies under my care. There are many who are plagued by nightmares after the declaration. I cannot guarantee that I can be there for you each time you have one… So I want you to come with us to Canterlot where you can get the support, help, and love that you need."
Willow cleared her throat, reaching into the planner she had tucked into the crook of one foreleg and retrieving a pamphlet. "There is a support group for military spouses that meets once a week that the princess and I believe would be a good idea for you."
"A support group?" Crystal bit her lower lip and gave a quick shake of her head, though she did accept the pamphlet in her magic. "I don't need therapy. There's nothing surprising about having nightmares, given the circumstances."
Luna withdrew her hoof while a soft sigh escaped her. "While that is true, nightmares can be consuming. I cannot stand by and allow a pony I care for to suffer. Not again."
Not again? Crystal could understand those words coming from Princess Celestia, but who had Luna lost? What was the story there?
Crystal didn't respond at first, merely standing there and sorting through her thoughts. Willow was lost in the planner and mumbling to herself. Luna, on the other hoof, stared directly at Crystal with a forlorn look in her eyes.
It was that sadness that convinced Crystal to reply, "All right."
Luna's ears perked and relief washed over her face with a smile. "All right?"
"All right," Crystal repeated, nodding. "I'll spend the weekdays in Canterlot and the weekends here." She raised a hoof when Luna opened her mouth. "Silent bought me an unlimited train pass, so the only thing I'll spend is time."
After a moment, Luna's smile widened. "That is a fair compromise, and I accept. Pack your things and we shall take the next train as soon as you are ready."
Crystal simply nodded and walked into the bedroom to pack a suitcase. Where was she going to stay while in Canterlot? She didn't want to impose on Velvet and make Nightingale feel uncomfortable. And she certainly wasn't going to stay at the castle. That just left one place she could think of… as much as she dreaded to even consider it.
♡
"Hi, Mother."
Upper Crust just stared, eyes wide in surprise, flinching when Jet Set called from inside, "Who is it, dear?"
Crystal's ears flicked back. "May I come in?"
"What?" Upper Crust blinked, then took a step to the side. "Of course. Of course you may." Her brow furrowed, but she kept quiet while Crystal walked past her.
Jet Set glanced up from his newspaper and a smile spread across his face. "Crystal?" He folded up the paper and set it aside so he could sit up straight. "My darling, what are you doing here?"
Crystal hesitated. She wasn't ready to have this conversation just yet. Instead, she smiled, set her suitcase by the stairs, and walked over to sit on the couch. "I am spending a few days in Canterlot and was hoping I could stay here, if that's all right."
"Of course it is." Jet Set looked at Upper Crust as she lingered at the door. "Isn't it, dear?"
"Yes." Upper Crust took a step forward, hesitated, then walked the rest of the way to sit beside Crystal. "Your old room is still a bedroom, so you're welcome to sleep there." She glanced at the door. "Is your husband not joining you for this trip?"
"It's just me," Crystal replied in a voice she hoped wasn't too quiet. She tried to smile wider to cover up the nerves fluttering in her stomach. "How have the two of you been?"
Jet Set sighed and tapped the newspaper with one hoof. "As well as can be expected with the dreadful times. It's truly an appalling thing. Equestria, at war? I never thought I'd see such a headline. It's really taken its toll. Why, some of our friends have even volunteered."
"Truly dreadful," Upper Crust parroted, her wary gaze locked on Crystal's form.
"But enough about such things." Jet Set waved a hoof, smiling. "How is life in the Crystal Empire? Tell us all about it!"
Crystal's smile grew more sincere as she relaxed into the couch. "Oh, the Empire is lovely. The ponies there are just so wonderful. Nothing like—" She cleared her throat. "Nothing like what you'd expect from ponies who have been gone for so long."
Jet Set hummed in agreement. "Yes, yes, quite. I would imagine the culture shock would take some adjustment, but it sounds as though you like it well enough."
"Where is your husband?" Upper Crust said, her tone somewhat pressing, almost insistent.
There it was. Crystal's stomach dropped and she shook her head. "If you're asking, then I think you know the answer, Mother."
Jet Set sat upright. "You don't mean—"
"—he volunteered?" Upper Crust shook her head and sighed. "I see. I understand, darling. We completely support your decision."
"My decision?" Crystal frowned lightly. "What do you mean by that?"
"Isn't it obvious?" Upper Crust gestured at the suitcase with one hoof. "You've come to stay here while you sort out the details of your marriage."
Crystal's ear flicked. "The 'details of my marriage'? What do you mean by that?"
Jet Set cleared his throat. "What I think your mother is trying to say is that we understand why you would want to… move back to Canterlot."
"I'm not moving back to Canterlot. I'm simply here for a few days." A feeling of uncertainty mixed with preemptive irritation stirred her to jolt upright. "This has nothing to do with my marriage."
"Well, then, perhaps this would be a good time to consider… alternatives," Jet Set said in a cautious tone. "I know you love Silent Knight, but love isn't going to take care of you while he's at war."
Upper Crust huffed. "And it certainly won't take care of you if he, Celestia forbid, dies."
Tears stung at the corners of Crystal's eyes, but her flaring anger staved them off. "How can you even say such a thing?!" She wanted to lash out and strike her mother. Throw something against the wall. Instead, she simply trembled. "He's not going to die!"
"We're just thinking of your best interests, dear." Jet Set tapped his hooves together. "We don't like the idea any more than you do."
"Nopony would blame you, darling," Upper Crust said, reaching out to put her hoof on Crystal's. "Divorces aren't unheard of."
Crystal recoiled and stood up, glaring at her mother. "Divorce?! I'm not getting a divorce, Mother!"
Jet Set clicked his tongue against the roof of his mouth. "You should at least consider it, dear. He did leave you, after all."
"Leave me?!" Crystal turned her glare on him as a boiling heat spread through her veins. "He didn't leave me! He volunteered at the behest of the princesses to do his duty! To uphold his oath!"
"And what of his oath to you?" Upper Crust shook her head. "There are plenty of guards that could volunteer in his place. Any number of them would suffice. He, however, is a husband, and should have respected that if he thought himself a good husband. Why did he have to volunteer?"
A bitter laugh escaped her and she took a few steps back to put distance between herself and them. "Why? Why! Because he had to volunteer, in the stead of those who can't." She glared at her father again and spat with bitter emphasis, "And in the stead of those who won't."
"Crystal Wishes!" Jet Set frowned as he sat up in his seat. "That's quite unfair. What good would I be over there?"
Her eyes narrowed as the anger boiled within her chest. "What good are you here?"
And with that, she snatched her suitcase in her magic and stormed out the door. When it slammed shut behind her, her resolve broke and tears fell down her cheeks while she walked blindly down a street. She had to get away. She didn't care where she ended up. Just as long as it was as far away from her parents as she could get.
How could they even suggest such a thing? The very notion twisted her stomach into a knot. It was almost as though they'd been thinking it and just waiting to spring the awful idea on her!
Why had she thought she could spend so much as a minute with them, much less several days? As her hooves carried her across the city, she just tried to breathe without choking on a sob. It wasn't until she had calmed down that she realized where she was going.
Thinking about it, she should have just gone there to begin with. It made perfect sense—much more sense than going to her parents'. When she finally arrived at the door, she sucked in a breath, knocked, and smiled when a mare answered.
"I'm sorry to show up out of the blue," she said, ducking her head, "but could I stay with you for a few days?"
Winterspear didn't miss a beat. She put a hoof on Crystal's shoulder and guided her inside. "Absolutely. Come on in."
Wandering everywhere
Each way I turn is wrong
How I'm wishing
I could be there
Right where I belong
If you have enjoyed this story so far, please consider taking a look at Anzel and my's website QuillnBlade.com for extra content such as mini stories, an Ask Us form to submit questions, responses to said questions, and special rewards for the awesome folks who support our Patreon.
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Wow...her parents will never change...sad really...
DIVORCE?! The absolute gall of Crystal's parents to even SUGGEST such an ugly, ignorant, stupid, insensitive, and divisive thing like that. I mean have their hearts gone black as ebony to suggest such a thing?! They'll have a better chance at picking up a pin with their hooves than hammering that kind of ungodly idea into Crystal's head!
I approve of this so hard I want to upvote the story again. I love to agonize over little details at times.
Not that Luna can see the future here (or can she...), but I believe she actually might be saving two ponies with her actions. If Silent Knight has any hope of surviving this war he will need one bright spot in the darkness. If Crystal were left adrift in the turbulent sea of her own fears, no one would be left to guide him home.
I think part of why that scuffle with the parents was so painful to Crystal is that deep down, for a least one moment, she has had those same thoughts.
7184337 Wow, you have a lot of feelings on this matter. Haven't you read the prequel? This makes perfect sense considering their previous opinions on Crystal and Silent's relationship as well as the, ahem, upper-crust thinking they have. Neither of them have a spouse at war or any similar problems plaguing them at the moment, so of course they'll be a little insensitive.
7184454 Well, divorce happens to be one of my berserk buttons. You know, like how Edward Elric goes all ballistic when other people call him short in Fullmetal Alchemist?
First off - Love that your adding more details about what Crystal is writing, that's been one of my favorite minor details that really add to the story. That was another awesome chapter! I'm loving how Crystal's inner turmoil and struggle is being written, especially with the constant reminders to herself to keep going.
While the opinion that Crystal's parents had wasn't exactly the best, I'm half glad it was said because I would much rather the concept be painted in such a negative light off the bat then having Crystal half consider it for a second months down the line or when she is at her weakest.
I'm also really looking forward to Luna and Winterspear playing (hopefully) a larger part in the story.
Also those two last words from Luna in this sentence.
There is so much underlying emotion and power behind those words, and if it was anything less I feel it would have made Luna a tad bit shallow character wise, but because those two words were added in at the perfect moment it really gave a huge depth to Luna's character. That being said I'm doubly excited to see Luna and Crystal interact more, because the conversations will be so enjoyable to read especially if Luna drops little tidbits like that.
As always great chapter and keep up the good work, can't wait for the next one!
Well... still hate Jet Set and Upper Crust
I could use an Eversor if I wanted them spread out over several dozen meters; or a Venenum, nice and painful. A Vindicare would be efficient but too quick. I could contact a death cul- huh, what? Ahem, oh nothing. Nothing at all.
7184480 ... why? My parent are divorced and I couldn't care less.
Well, at least some things never change.
THE NERVE OF THEM TO NOT SUPPORT THEIR ONE AND ONLY DAUGHTER!!! Ugh!!!
Anyway, I saw your story on the featured list tonight, Congrats again.
7184584 Suit yourself.
7184633 That's exactly what I was thinking.
7184707 They may have lost their only chance to see their grandfoals if Silent ever comes back. They only ever think if themselves and never look to the future. That is what I got out of the conversation.
NEVER LOOK BACK Crystal!! You don't need them! Spend some time with Papa Pizza.
7184768 That's a good point: she can always spend time with her grandparents along her aunts, uncles, and their relations.
Wow, drama bomb. I feel like I'm really watching one of those TV series with your writing.
7184678 That... Is not a viable answer to my question. I asked you "why", remember?
At the very beginning of this chapter I started to wonder how much longer we would be seeing Crystal suffering alone. That isn't to say that part of the story went on too long, I think it went on for a good amount of time. My point is that I'm happy she's finally getting out. What she's been doing isn't all that healthy. Yes, she's had a few good cries, but I don't think she's completely stopped holding it in (I suppose I could be wrong, but that's how it looks to me). I hope she goes to that support group.
Alienating Your Kids for Fun and Profit!
Man, I was hoping at least Jet would be a bit less assholeish about it.
Takes a sip of Coke and sets the cup down. Stares at this chapter and slowly draws yet another sip. "Crystal, the pony, your parents are total f'n chumps."
Okay, either Crystal's parents are exceedingly insensitive and out of touch, or they really want her to divorce Silent (I think Jet Set is the former and Upper Crust is the latter, based on what we know of them)
For the best really. I never cared for Luna's dream schenanigans meself. Dreams, and nightmares, are a means of dealing with trauma and sorting through personal issues and its a very bad idea to futz with 'em.
And may I give a hearty and soul felt f
ck you to Canterlots resident salty c
nts Jet Set and Upper Crust. Once God gets back into the smiting business and has soundly squished my good self like the sad cockroach of a man I am, may he then attend to the more joysome and world benefitting task of turning Upper into a pillar of salt to be licked by the homeless (I know what your thinking... aren't they suffering enough
) and may Jet be afflicted with c
ck pox
Ok.
Jet Set. Upper Crust. I've basically made a career out of standing up for the two of you. Especially you, Upper Crust. I don't regret even a second of it.
But this time, I can't help either of you.
Upper Crust. You're swell. You've got a very misguided and abrasive way of being swell, but you really are where your daughter is concerned.
Jet Set. You're a pretty good guy. You stuck by the love of your life, even at a seemingly great personal cost to yourself. And you've done well to support your daughter as she set out into the world.
But this.
This, right here. It's a problem both of you have, but I really want to hammer it home. This is why Upper Crust's parents don't like you.
It's not because you haven't done a day of labor in your life, not really. It's because of this. It's because of your flat refusal to accept the reality that there might be aspects and areas of life in which you are not an expert. In which you don't have all the answers, and don't know better than everyone else.
That's why the majority of readers here don't like you. It isn't because you're unlikable. It's because you're intolerable. It's because you won't consider alternative viewpoints and accept that they may have merit even when they aren't your own. It's because you refuse to let others in, unless doing so somehow aligns with your interests, and makes you look like vultures.
I'm sorry. I love you both, but right now, I can't fucking stand either one of you. You're on your own this time.
Good luck.
7185000 dude this was awesome! Made my night with this comment
Although Crystal's parents are clearly being dicks here, as I said before back in the chapter when Silent decided he was just going to drop everything and go to war, I kind of do hope they break up because to be honest I just don't see their relationship. In many ways, Crystal x Silent feels like the 'designated couple' of the fic--even though they don't really seem to work very well together; Silent desperately needs to shape up in all aspects of his relationship with Crystal.
In many ways, it's Crystal who's done all the romance in the relationship, and made sacrifices (like moving to CE and being cut off from all her everything), while Silent has done nothing, in turn, to earn her affections. Moreover, what he does do all the time is often hurtful to his wife--someone he's supposed to be in love with. I think Crystal is always going to come secondary to Silent's one true love--his job--and unless he changes (and I doubt he will) Crystal needs to wake up and realize that.
7185101
THIS.
This is what I've been feeling the past chapters. Like...10+
The romance feels strained, if there at all.
I support what her parents were doing; if Silent isn't going to do more than pay lip service to their marriage... *cough cough* ...then, yes, the option of divorce should be brought up as being on the table.
But as the very first conversation topic as your obviously distressed child walks through the door?! (hold on, I'm going to need more exclamation points)
I don't hate Crusty because of this 7185000 so much. It's more because, in Crusty's self-centric world, her daughter, as a separate thinking and feeling person who relies on Crusty for basic support, doesn't even enter the running in importance behind Crusty's own goals for Crystal. Crystal doesn't seem to be a person to Crusty, but an object. A well appreciated object, but an object none-the-less. She's not on the shelf you intended? Why, just move her to a different one...
"What good are you here?" YOU GO GIRL! Where does the line to walk up and punch Crusty and Jet start?
7185101
7185110
I see we're ignoring the attempts at being romantic throughout Secrets/Hopes, fair enough. But, might I ask, how DO you feel about military families? Call it a personal curiosity.
Also, have you considered that part of the reason Crystal feels so torn up about all this and that we get the worst of it in the fic where she is the star is that she was brought up in a little bubble where she wanted for nothing and never knew anything about what joining the guard/military actually meant aside from (and Crystal will have to forgive me for grossly oversimplifying) "hunky muscular stallions in shiny armor who saved the princess/mare from evil"? Because that is literally the character Crystal started out as and slowly but surely lost along the way of becoming an adult and then realizing that Silent might actually die in war.
I'm just curious because, having read QnB verse from the start, I've watched Silent fumble through romance, Crystal try to be patient, and both find a happy middle ground for the relationship to stand on all the way up until marriage. The war caused a problem because of their upbringings and Silent's devotion to right what he felt was a wrong he caused. And, if you read his side of things Secrets, she is literally on his mind at all times he's not fighting or mourning those he's lost along the way. If you don't, can't help you, because all you're going to know is that Crystal misses him and everyone around her says "ditch the guy you fell in love with because he went off to serve and protect others like he swore to do, your word shouldn't mean anything because something something he went to war".
In short, I'm on the opposite side of this fence. Completely.
So, I'm with the everyone-is-angry-at-Crystal's-parents group that comprises...everyone.
I like that Luna is potentially getting back in the spotlight, I feel like she was a huge part of the story and provided the only arcing plot in a slice-of-life story concerning her history and powers (and I LOVE the slice-of-life part of the story as well of course). That was kind of lost for a while so I hope it's coming back.
With her showing a motherly side to Crystal maybe they will become close like Silent and Luna became close. I can only hope...
7185151
How do I feel about them? I respect them. I'm not in the military; and whether or not anyone agrees with the politics of it all, I respect and support both they and their families. They've got a different kind of strength to go through what they do.
I think the clincher is that it DOES seem to be a bit one sided. Yes, Crystal is on Silent's mind; but his duty seems to dominate his life to the point of overriding any second-though. (volunteer as opposed to draft, ect.)
The attempted romance pretty much puttered out though...once they got engaged and married.
Which....is actually a rather dark reality, from what I understand for a lot of couples.
7185188 So, basically, he's bad because he volunteered to go to a war that he literally had a hoof in starting instead of staying home. And we're ignoring that prior to leaving, he did everything he could to give her a comfortable lifestyle with the means he had (despite not knowing that she could basically buy whatever because of her money). Oh, and your point on sacrificing for her amounts to ... what? Him not just quitting? Him saying "lolno, I started a war but I'm gonna stay here and make kissyfaces"? Silent Knight has always been about owning up to his actions and their consequences from chapter one of Memoirs.
I'd explain the intricacies of actual relationships and how they do go through ups and downs in terms of passion, but I'm far too sober for that conversation. I'm out.
7185214
.....I was trying to have a civil discussion, but if you want to be ornery, that's your deal.
I never said he's bad. I am trying to convey that while his actions make sense, it's not coming off as fair to Crystal. The situation is much more complex than just 'he's a jerk,' but the relationship seems to be more focused (effort wise,) on Crystal's end.
Wow, I knew Crystal's parents were bad, but I didn't expect that.
7185188 For me, I think the main challenge I seem to see with people is that they treat Silent Knight's "job" as "just another job." That seems to be a major point of contention. They attribute to him the same level of "choice" that we have in our daily lives. The truth of the matter is he lacks that level of choice due to the oaths he took. So the big argument I see tossed around a lot is that he "should not" have volunteered for the war. By doing so he has "left" Crystal.
Here are my issues with that thought process.
1. This, to me, is an all or nothing situation. Silent Knight cannot be special. Thus if he "should not" have volunteered than we have to extrapolate that no royal guard should have volunteered except the orphans who have no loved ones what so ever. Chances are anypony that volunteers is leaving a loved one or two.
2. Providing #1 is the case, then "volunteer" would immediately shift to "assigned." Which, somehow, seems more palatable to readers. They want the choice to be "out of his control."
And that is inherently what it comes down to. They're asking for a TON of volunteers. It always starts with volunteering so that those in less critical situations can stand in for those with "more to lose" so to speak. When it comes to volunteering for dangerous things a logical progression I've seen is that typically (and this is a BROAD generalization) you'll see young single people jump in first. Then married people without children. Then married people with older children. And, last of all, married people with young children. When you ask for a LOT of volunteers you're going to run those initial groups out pretty fast.
Silent Knight falls into the second category. Additionally, he is highly skilled, a combat veteran, and feels responsible for what is going on. Does he have a choice? Inarguably, by the strictest definition, yes. Is it a real choice though or mostly the illusion of one given where he is? I'd argue the latter.
It comes down to this for me. Silent Knight was a royal guard when they met. Silent Knight was a royal guard when he proposed and she said yes. Silent Knight was a royal guard when they took their vows. Crystal Wishes married into the royal guard knowing logically what she was getting into even if she wasn't emotionally prepared for it.
The same happens to our military personnel every day. As much as people want to pretend Silent Knight is "so much different" or that "folks don't make these kinds of decisions" they do. It is as simple as that. It isn't easy being a military spouse or child and I think Crystal is doing an excellent job of portraying that.
I just struggle because when I see the thought process of Jet Set and Upper Crust I know I've seen similar in comments and such and I can only extrapolate that to "all soldiers." Silent Knight isn't a special case just because every military decision he made didn't come with someone saying "These are your orders, go." Life is never that neat and tidy.
7185245
That sums things up very well. Perhaps the point of disconnect was, at least for me, expecting a fairy-tale romance (aka, the lighthearted themes of previous stories,), but, got a more realistic taste instead, as things progressed (which, I might add, is an amazing feature of your writing and story.)
Makes much more sense when you look at it with more of a realistic eye. I find it rather fascinating you treating Silent as not special, when all his actions show him as such, but at the same time.....not. (If I had a beard I'd stroke it in thought.)
7185254 I thank you :D That is the duality of the role for him really. Silent Knight obviously has special elements to him as the protagonist but, to a certain degree, I try to focus his military life around the experiences of those I know and love in a similar role. His family faces the same challenges they faced/face.
That is one of the keys to Hopes, honoring the military spouse. Which, you are absolutely right about your view of this story vs the first. This is a very different kind of story!
7185264
Aaaaaah. When presented like that, it makes much more sense, and all the better, I think.
Welp. Time to jump onto the wagon headed for Crystal's parents. I need to bring my pitchfork! =P
7185000
...dude...have you ever considered becoming a lawyer? Because if I ever needed one, I'd hire you.
7185307
"Legal trouble? Hope you know Phyco!"
I've thought about it, but it's expensive and I don't know if I have quite the right temperament for it.
7185151
I have no opinion on them, and even if I did I don't think it would relevant to the problems in this relationship, at least not overtly.
Much of their relationship seems to be Silent stumbling, and Crystal making excuses or, as you put it 'being patient' with him without him every improving in any great way. This is the source of the issue I have with the relationship, it comes down to Silent basically doing very little, and Crystal making all the compromises and suffering the most for this pony she loves--but apparently doesn't care enough about her to confide in her or consult her before volunteering to go to war.
7185214
One of the consequences of getting married is, either explicitly or implicitly, making that other person a core part of your life, to care about them and to think about them and then act on those thoughts, not merely think them, which Silent doesn't seem to want to do.
He's bad because he volunteered to go to war without ever considering his newly wed wife, or factoring her into his plans or actions for the future--and it's volunteer duty, it isn't the same as being assigned somewhere he has no choice in the matter. And by "consider" I mean sitting down with her and talking about it before making any decisions on what to do, even if he really wanted to go ahead and volunteer for it because of guilt.
7185245
My problem isn't that he volunteered, my problem is that he volunteered without talking it over with Crystal. At all.
It's unfair to suggest that people are upset with Silent volunteering for a war, and that this somehow can be generally applied to all soldiers, because the problem--at least for me--isn't the fact that he's going to war, it's the fact that he's making a huge life altering decision for both himself and his spouse without actually talking to her about it, and this sort of carelessness seems to be a pattern for Silent Knight.
Jet Set...Upper Crust...you two...
You know, my feelings towards them until this moment were feelings of neutrality. I didn't like them or hate them, just accepted them as part of the story.
But THIS? Telling Crystal they'd UNDERSTAND if she wants to DIVORCE Silent Knight because he "LEFT" her?!? For Celestia's sake, he's fulfilling an oath he made BEFORE they ever married! Something Crystal seems to grasp.
Ok, yes I'm aware Jet Set and Upper Crust don't want to or aren't able to see this from a different perspective. But still! She's their daughter! You'd think they'd at LEAST use a little tact and not be so...so insensitive. The way it's said, it seems that Upper Crust, at least, would be DELIGHTED if SK and CW divorced...
In my opinion, Crystal Wishes...until they drop that mindset, you're better off without them.
On a side note, it's nice to see Luna showing up. Winterspear too.
7185344
In many of his choices they did not have a discussion. This was, explicitly, a time they did even if he did show up with a pre-conceived idea of what he should do. We can't say there was no way for Crystal to talk him out of it. Was it likely? No, but to say in this instance there was no discussion isn't really fair to him.
They discussed it, he explained why, and after he did so she didn't really continue to fight him going. Was it great communication? Again no, but he didn't just send her a letter and head off. He went home, he faced her, and they had it out.
This point is brought up often enough to me that I felt it was necessary to be stated. Does it apply to everyone's objections? Certainly not.
It is more of a point to have folks think the situation over. To break free of Upper Crusts idea because, as I pointed out before when using her an example, that is exactly what she is saying even if she doesn't understand it.
If your spouse leaves for the war, divorce them.
As far as his carelessness I don't want to get into too much of a debate. He obviously has issues, there is no doubt there. Again, though, there are a few examples of this but I see it portrayed as if he is constantly doing it and really it just isn't there in the material. Certainly not Crystal and I's intent. Though we are not by any stretch perfect writers.
In the end being in the military leads to certain obligations and mindsets that differ from what we might expect in our daily lives. Volunteer doesn't mean the same thing. They have deeper consequences of not.
One final bit:
Yes, and that goes both ways. Crystal married a royal guard, not a pony that later joined the royal guard. Hopes is all about her learning what that actually means.
Crystal is a core part of his life but so is his service. Nobody changes overnight. He has literally been trained to be a soldier his whole life and he's been married less than one year.
Is it really fair to expect him to miraculously become a perfect husband in such a short period of time?
I should point out I'm really just in this for the discussion of the issues we're trying to portray in the stories. I'm perfectly fine with you being upset with him ;) I don't take it personally. I'm just explaining his mindset is all.
7185344
He volunteered to be an advisor. Equestria was not going into this war as a belligerent, but merely to offer support for their ally. He would not have seen combat, would not have been in a position where he would be at direct risk, and would have been back in short order.
This was before, keep in mind, it became clear what an absolute quagmire the war was going to be, and by the time the information was present for that determination to be made, Sundramore had killed a lot of Equestrian ponies and the war became personal. Even if he hadn't volunteered, he would have been drafted, and we would be in exactly the same position we're in right now with the only difference being that Silent Knight — ostensibly — would not have had the agency to make the decision himself.
It might just be me, but when we get down to the brass tacks, I don't see any real distinction, because no matter what, you should not be mad at Silent Knight over this.
You should be mad at Defense Minister Sombra, because this is his fault. Silent Knight was there when the Happiness went down, but who put the Happiness there? Who made the decisions that led to Silent Knight being in a position where he would be faced with death, and eventually be drafted?
Silent Knight's only real crime here was making a decision with information that was not accurate, when he had been led to believe it was. Should he have guessed that it would shake down the way it has? Maybe, but that doesn't make him a poor husband.
It just means that there's one of him born every minute.
My reaction towards Crystal's parents: ...seriously?
Perks of having friends in high places right there.
Such wonderful, merciless pragmatism! Oh, Crystal, thank you, these kind of moments are right up my alley! Crystal Wishes might be zealously opposed to this idea (and I am on her side here, let us be clear) but this thought, this option shall remain in her mind now. Upper Crust and Jet Set have sown a weed that shall linger and spread in her head the more she will face despair and loneliness... Brilliant! Absolutely marvelous!
7185331
Catchy.
And yeah, you're right. It is insanely expensive.
Well... I can kinda understand where Jet Set and Upper Crust are coming from. I don't think I'll be too happy if my son-in-law(not that I actually have one) just upped and volunteered to go to fight someone else's war and my daughter(also don't have one) comes back home in a pretty bad state(The last few chapters have been hard on the poor girl, the constant nightmares probably won't help either).
Excellent writing as always Crystal Wishes.
Wooo Luna! Im glad that she came into the picture, and that she still cares for Crystal as well. And She does have a good idea. I cant really fault Crystal to ask to stay with her parents.. but im sort of surprised to see that she didnt see that coming given their track record. Anywho, It is nice to see Winterspear and to see how she will be able to help Crystal. I cant wait for the next chapter!
7185479 Its always the things people assume and say without knowing the full story that are the hardest thoughts to kill. I believe you may be right, It is gonna weed around in her head for a long while. -Grins and sips some wine- Let the mind games begin yes?