My name is Beatboxing Brass. I'm 19 years old. I have no experience with a weapon of any kind. Oh, and I'm going to the wastelands. I wonder how this will turn out.
A 14 year old writer that has a dream of one day being able to write a New York Times Bestseller. Favorite pony is Sunset Shimmer. Also, a part time youtuber for a bit extra money.
My name is Beatboxing Brass. I'm 19 years old. I have no experience with a weapon of any kind. Oh, and I'm going to the wastelands. I wonder how this will turn out.
NobbleyKyle I gave him some advice. I didn't really have much "good" with the entire thing being instant. It was a PM.
6032537 Thank you for the advice. I really think that I've been trying to keep it in one tense. I hope that people will get to realize I'm trying my best, and I hope to keep on editing when I can. Also, when I'm done writing I was thinking of going back over the whole story and edit it. Again, thank you. I will take the advice into consideration.
And hey, nobody makes a great and fantastic first story. Try typing a chapter and reading it before you publish it. That's what I do, and don't forget, I am also willing to help if needed.
Hey! I just want to say I hope you improve your writing. This story could definitely be awesome if the chapters were a bit longer and had more detail. GL! :)
Please show don't tell. You told. But hey, first story's always rough. It just feels so... rushed. Introduce in a more tactful way. The transition between Brass' monolog and the jump to reality was as abrupt as Rush Limbaugh's change of opinion once someone discovers his hypocrisy. I do hope you edit. So... much... wasted... potential! I want to get to know your fine OC.