To Fly Free

by Emma Anarchy

Falling is Just Like Flying

"I'm sorry Mrs. Breeze, but there is no way other to stop it."
My mother Ocean Breeze held on to me like I was her anchor to the world, she was shaking uncontrollably and with each sob held me tighter. We were sitting in the Ponyville hospital after an appointment and we had received some heart breaking news. Ever since I was a little filly I have had trouble with flying, I was a slow learner but I had just been able to run the full track yesterday. The problem I had with my wings was a disease, it was rare, but unfortunately I had it and in the worst place possible. My wings were weak and my feathers were thin and all because of this sickness. Now I had been told it was going to be difficult, but not fatal. But today I was told otherwise.

Through the entire thing I had been strong. I had let them touch me, poke and prod me; I stood tall as they told us the sickness was getting worse, but it wasn't until they brought up the operation I broke. I felt as if I was going deaf, slowly drifting away, dying inside. They told me the operation would involve cutting the central magic nerves in my wings, and as a result I might never fly again. I knew that if I didn't go through with this I would die anyway, but to lose my wings? My mother cried while my father Forest Breeze comforted her. I said nothing, and I did nothing but shed a single silent tear.

The days before the operation were filled with a sense of oncoming doom. I didn't go to school for the rest of the year and instead took every opportunity I got to fly, rest on clouds, glide and just enjoying my freedom. But then each time I glanced at my wings, my beautiful flawless wings I couldn't help by cry. I tried to saver every moment with them, but the days went by too fast. The next thing I knew, I was walking slowly dragging my hooves toward the hospital. Both of my parents had to wait outside while I was under, so I said a tearful goodbye and followed the nurse. We walked down a winding maze of hallways that seemed to never end, and for a moment I hope they never would. But finally we reached a ward and she gave me a bed and a nightgown to put on. The nurse left, telling me she would be back soon. When she left I cried; I was the only one in the ward so all I could hear was the reverberating sound of my shaky sobs. The nurse came back with two doctors and they wheeled me into an operation room. As I breathed in the anesthetic I flapped my wings and felt the soft wind they created one last time, and then I blacked out.

I woke to the sound of soft mutters and whimpering, I blinked a few times and the world around me came into focus. My mother and father were sitting by my bed, both of them holding my hoof, my father gentlely stroking it. I looked around and then remembering why I was in the hospital. I sat up so quickly I made my parents jump. I looked at my back but strangely my wings were still there. I moved them tenderly and they didn't hurt. For a moment I was puzzled but then when I tried to get out of bed my father stopped me. He shook his head and said,
"No sweetie, don't try to fly, it will just break my heart more because I know you c-can't." His voice cracked and he looked away from me to hide his tears. I sat back down and looked at the machine I was connected to. It was a magic transferrer gently replacing the cloud magic I had lost during the operation. As soon as the shock of it all really hit me that I would never fly again, never dance with the birds or sing with the wind when the doctor came in. I pleaded with him to find away to make my wings work but he just told me there was no way he could and that he way very sorry but there was nothing he could do.

As we left the hospital a day later I was still in a wheel chair, magic still flowing into my body and my wings hidden behind a cloak. I couldn't bare to look at them now so my mother had made me a brown cloak. It was plain and simple but it made me feel better because she had gone to Zecora and gotten some herbs and the scent was heavenly. If only the reason for it was so. As an attempt to cheer me up my parents, got me the new Sherlock Holmes book that just came out. It was called The Reichenbach Fall. It was the last book of the second series, and it was so exciting, I almost forgot about my wings. As I neared the end of the book I read one line that made me think, it was spoken by the villian of the story but it was very meaningful to me. The line was "Falling is just like flying, only with a more permanent destination." I thought about it and remembered that when I had my working wings, I would fly up really high then release them and fall for a while then catch myself before I hit the ground. But without my wings I would not be able to stop the fall, so I had no hope left. I sighed and turned out the light.

* * *

One day I felt bored and went into the outskirts of the Ever Free Forest. I decided to look for some new herbs and make a new scent for my cloak. As I walked I saw some birds flying, enjoying their time. I sat and watched them thinking about my own wings. Then for the first time in a whole year I took of my cloak to look. My wings were still beautiful I could still move them and care for them normally but they couldn't channel enough magic to get me off the ground. The feathers were no longer sickly looking but thick and healthy, but of course they had no use. I retied my cloak around my neck and was about to leave the small clearing when I heard a rustle in the bushes, so I ducked down and pulled up my hood. I saw two ponies with nets and crossbows, poachers. They were headed towards the birds I had been watching. When I realized what they were going to do I was too late, the crossbow fired and the net was swung. The most beautiful bird of them all was shot out of the air but not dead, they had cut off its wings and ran away with them. I ran to the poor creature, and found it had lost most of its blood. I held it in my hooves as it died, mourning for it as I knew no one else would be able to. When all life had left it I screamed and stood up I flared my wings in anger though the poachers were long gone,
"You monsters!," I shouted "you killed her, you took her wings and killed her!" I was so angry I could do nothing but yell. I yelled until I couldn't make a sound, then I cried myself to sleep over the dead bird's body.

* * *
I woke with a start, I was back in my own bed. The whole thing had been a dream, but a very realistic one. I turned on the light and looked at myself in the mirror. As I stared at my reflection I thought about the dream and soon came to a realization, I was the bird, I was the one who had my wings taken from me or as good as. They killed me from the inside out becasue they had taken my freedom. The next morning I told my parents about the dream and raged at them about the doctors, the operation, and everything that made me miserable. They sat silently until I was finished and none of us spoke until my mother sighed and reminded me of all the reason the operation had taken place. She reminded me of the fatal disease and told me to be thankful they at least let me keep the wing and they were not amputated.
"I know this has been hard for you dear, but we all are just happy you are alive." She looked at me sympathetically I sighed,
" Okay mom, I'm sorry, I just wish I could fly again and have fun with the wind and the air and all of the sky..." My voice trailed off wistfully as I thought about flying again. My mother and father each put a wing around me and hugged me tight. Their embrace and full support was all I needed to feel better in that moment.

My life had been getting better. I was finally happy with my arrangements. My wings were strong and I could still use them for other things except flying and the operation had happened over five years ago. I still didn't have my cutie mark but it didn't matter to me, my flank was covered by my cloak anyway. Two years earlier my family had moved away to Appaloosa and I was still in Ponyville. I had found a nice job and I was happy. But then of course disaster struck as it always does,just when I think things are taking a turn for the better my world gets torn apart and shred to bits leaving me to pick up the pieces of my broken heart. One fateful Saturday I was approached by Derpy our local mail mare. I greeted her with a smile she did not return and she handed me a parchment scroll, tipped her hat and left without a word, all of which is extreamly uncharacteristic for Derpy. I opened the scroll and read it by the second sentence my heart had stopped. The parchment fell to the ground from my loose hooves in slow motion as it sank in. My mother and father were dead, both killed by a train wreck going from Appaloosa to Ponyville. They had been coming to see me for my birthday today and died in the process. Their names were among the many others that did not survive, one name in particular made me feel even worse than I already did. The name Dinky Doo stood out along side my the names of my parents. I picked up the parchment and walked over to Derpy's house. With each slow step the pain only got worse and my heart sunk lower, I'm sure that if I could cry my heart out I would but I needed to be strong. I let a single tear slide down my cheek before I knocked on the door. It was answered with tears and a hug from the poor mail mare I hated to see her this way she was always so cheery and to see her so broken and upset just wasn't right. We sat together and mourned our losses over warm tea and muffins, remembering our loved ones and the good times together.

By the time I had turned sixteen it was four years to the day I had lost my parents forever. I had retreated to the Ever Free Forest and lived near Zecora for about three and a half years. She kept me up with what was going on in Ponyville and gave me herbal remedies for pains in my wings from time to time. Otherwise I was on my own. I made a home in a hallow tree near the center of the forest, it was peaceful and also near the most beautiful water fall anypony has ever seen. I became aquatinted with the timber wolves in the area soon after finding the waterfall . At first I feared them and kept as far away as possible but then slowly over time we became friends. The timber Wolves soon became protective of me and when ever somepony traveled to deep into the forest they would go after them. My wolves never hurt anyone but just to make sure with some help from Zecora I put a charm on them so they could not fatally injure somepony.

My wolves were what kept me going, they were my family especially Elefteria. She was the most elegantly created timber wolf in the world I created her my self out of an old tree that fell in a storm. I wanted her to mean something, to stand out among the others to be a symbol of hope for not just me but the other timber wolves as well. So on her back I carved to delicate wings, intricately carved but the strongest part of her body. These wings would never fail her as mine failed me. I named her Elefteria because in Greek it means freedom in the most powerful way. As I carved her I whispered her name over and over. When I had finished her she became my life and my cutie mark. When I placed her down compleated a white light flashed on my flank and I looked down and saw it. It had taken sixteen years but it was finally here. My cutie mark was a wolf paw with wings behind it, because of my new cutie mark I gave myself a new name, Wolf Wind. She was my source of light and happiness. Elefteria was the sweetest pup you will ever meet and never fought over food. I thought her at a young age to fly and she got the hang of it very quickly and soon it was they only way she wanted to move; with her wings. She grew into a strong timber wolf and became large enough for me to ride on her back. We flew all over the forest and explored every nook and cranny of the castle of the two sisters. We found a manticore cave, the zebra kingdom, and the most amazing plant ever, the Zap Apple tree. I studied the cycle of the tree and found that on the eighth full moon of the year all the timber wolves in forest would gather around the tree thicket and watch the leaves grow right before their eyes.

Beautiful was all my wolves were, beautiful. But one night some stupid ponies were camping to close to the waterfall and my wolves scared them off in the second night they were just leaving anyway so no harm done. Or so I thought, those stupid ponies hadn't put out their campfire properly and it started to grow. It took over the surrounding area and burned it all. My wolves panicked and did their best to protect both me and the Zap Apple tree. Before the flames could reach the tree I grabbed three apples off its branches then ran. The tree's roots burned and it fell into the waterfall turning the water different colors of the rainbow. Elefteria was right behind me along with at least twenty other timber wolves. As we ran I saw pegasai bringing coulds over the forest and putting out the forest fire. I quickened my pace toward Zecora's hut but I tripped on a root and a large burning tree fell right behind me.I looked back for my wolves in a panic, there was the burning tree, and behind it a horror scene. Ten of my wolves had been crushed and burned to a crisp, all the others ran around in a frenzy, some of them with their tails on fire and the worst of it all, my Elefteria's wings were on the ground burning away her body nowhere to be found.

I got up and ran, I didn't look back or hesitate, but I let the tears fall fast and free. I lost had everything my wings,my parents,and now my friends and my home. All my losses were my own fault, my wings I could have kept my flight if I had just payed better attention, I could have saved my parents if I had stayed in better touch, and I could have prevented the forest fire if I haddent been so ignorant to all the safety hazards. All that had gone wrong was my doing. I had been so selfish and only caring about my flight my stupid wings were the least of my problems all the time, but I was just to dumb to see the other things in the world that were beautiful. I missed it all and I could have done so much more to help. I leaned against a tree and full on cried. I screamed and yelled tears pouring down my face. I couldn't do it anymore, I couldn't hold in all the pain any longer. The hood of my cloak fell over my eyes and I breathed in the calming aroma. The sent was faint but still as soothing as ever. Lotus flowers and sweet grass, rosemary,thyme, and the slightest hint of pine wood. All the smells reminded me of all of the loved ones I had lost, and why.

I needed freedom from the emotions taking over me. If only my wings were free of the binds of earthly limitation, I could escape from all this sadness and just be free. I looked up at the full September moon looking down at me, the same moon that had smiled at me when flew, and the same one who smiled when I didn't. If I could fly it wouldn't make a difference to anyone, if I didn't exist no one would care. they would forget me, that strangle made me happy. I could disappear and none would stop me. I laughed at myself and sat down on the soft leaf covered forest floor. I laughed like a crazy pony, thinking of how stupid I had been and all the ways I had ruiend the lives of others. I had been selfish to want to fly again I should have know it was impossible. But then again I thought I would never have a home never have a friend or or a family again. I remembered all that I had done that had made me happy, soon my tears turned to ones of joy. I rested my head on a root of the great oak tree and whispered to it everything I wanted to tell my parents, my wolves and the world. All the secrets I had discovered in this life. Then with the power of my wolves' spirits with me I called upon the forest and all it's great power.
The trees nearest to me then showed their true selves, the powerful beings they where and lifted me up to the highest cloud in the sky. I sat down on the soft curls of cloud and let the surround me compleatly. The cloud was soft and smooth cool and moist it was everything I needed to feel alive again.

I stood up on the cloud a found I was so high up that Ponyville looked like a small speck and Canterlot was only a shimmering light in the distance. The wind whirled around me blowing my my cape, mane and tail all over. It was nothing short of beautiful. Their was no smell of the town up here, no sound but the wind and my own breathing. I spread my wings and felt the breeze move through each feather. The feeling was like one you feel after removing a cast and feeling fresh air on you body again. I breathed in and out I wanted to see my family in this moment, they should all be here with me. But they weren't and that was my own mistake. All the things I wanted couldn't happen I realized. Nothing great can be achieved without a sacrifice. I flapped my wings and looked up at the sky and smiled then in peace I steped forward off the cloud. I saw my father and as he smiled at he me flew along side me. My mother laughed and as we flew together dared me to keep up. My wolves were there panting and smiling their little wolfie smiles the ran below me chasing me and my parents. We were all laghing together.
Smiling together.
Running together.
Falling together.
Falling together.
Flying together.
Flying.

Author's Note:

So that was it and yes I know it was not worth writing ect, ect... But I had fun
This is a dream I once had about my self and I woke up and started writing so here you go. Please feel free to give any constructive criticism. Thanks a ton for reading!

Comments

[PegaSeraph]

Nice story,(and totally worth writing) have a like

some things though...
But today I was told other wise. otherwise.(I think?)

and gave me herbal so others from time to time.

?

[Emma Anarchy]

6082660
Oops thanks. I will fix that.

[Nope Nope Nope]

Sad. But amazing. I made your OC a Stand, because she deserved it.

Stand Name: Fly Again (Theme song of Rainbow Sea)
User: Wolf Wind
Stand Type: Bounded Ability Stand
Strength: E
Speed: A
Range: B
Precision: A
Durability: E
Potential: A
Appearance/Ability: This Stand appears as a rainbow-colored wristband. This Stand grants the user the ability to levitate and "shoot" forward objects, including organisms like herself. The height of the levitation and the speed of the "shooting" depends on how much of the user's will and desire is put into it. For unknown reasons, it also grants the user the ability to breath in vacuum to liquid-filled environments.