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A Simple Story

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Inkpot has a new story and he will be damned if his competition beats him out again. With this twist ending there is no way she can out do him on this one. He just has to get to his editors office, just don't get distracted

My first story ever so read it and weep and insult me lots, thanks!

Chapters (1)

Comments ( 3 )

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A Follower

A Follower #1 · Mar 28th, 2015 · 1 · ·

Oh no, its the pink one.

Its like this has happened in a dream or something.

it's

"Come on Inky it's just a silly ol' nickname don't get you cupcakes in a bundle!

your

Well that was different. I was wondering what the whole déjà vu thing was about, but now I understand. Very creative.

ChangelingLumin

ChangelingLumin #2 · Mar 28th, 2015 · · ·

Props to you for writing a story within a story. I have yet to see something like this.

However, there seems to be a lack of description as to what's happening around your characters, and most of the time you TELL not SHOW. Apart from a few grammar errors that can easily be fixed, that is the only problem I have with this story.

Not bad for a first fic. It just needs more work put into it.

scorpion1m