Prank War
When Cadance awoke she was still tired from the night before. She had spent a good few hours with her aunts, relishing the company, and helping Luna tease the heck out of Celestia. It was one of the most enjoyable things she had done since she came to Equestria, but the long day, and subsequent night had taken it's toll on her, forcing her to bid her aunts goodnight and crash on her bed.
Yawning loudly, she checked her clock, finding it to be almost noon. She rolled out of bed, still somewhat dead on her hooves, and shuffled to her bathroom, before taking care of business. After the few years she had been here, she now hardly noted how weird it was to go to relieve herself. Trying to do it as a pony took away from the shock of trying to do it as a female. All said and done, she headed out for lunch.
Once at the dinning room she saw Celestia was already there eating her lunch. She smirked at Cadance;
“Well look who has risen from the dead.”
Cadance levelled her with a glare; “Considering the events of the past couple days, I earned a lie-in. I was the one keeping ponies calm while you sunbathed in the sun.”
“I wasn't in the sun.” Cadance looked at Celestia with a shocked and confused expression. “I hid in a cave near Ponyville when I felt my sister's release, not wanting to confront her unless Twilight failed. How do you think I was there so quick on her victory?” Celestia then look at her confused. “Why would you think she had the power to banish me to the sun? I needed the Elements of Harmony to do that a thousand years ago.” Cadance just sat there, unable to refute her logic, finally reaching the conclusion:
-'OH YOU TROLL!'-
“Everypony just assumed she did that since you just vanished.”
“Well, they're wrong.” Admitting defeat, Cadance just shrugged and turned to her meal. A flower filled sandwich awaited her. It seemed like the usual faire, a mixture of flowers, but it also contained a blue flower she couldn’t say she’d seen the castle serve before. A quick sniff didn’t reveal any secrets, so she took a bite. It was surprisingly pretty tasty, and from the quickly hidden smile she thought she saw Celestia make, she assumed it was a ingredient trial – perhaps it would now be served more often.
“By the way, thank you for that lovely prank, it took me half the night to finally convince Luna that you are my in truth my niece, and not my daughter.”
“How did she respond?” Cadance asked curiously.
“Oh she laughed it off, saying that it was good that somepony else can prank me.” Somehow Celestia manage to pull off a predatory grin with equine features. It unnerved Cadance a bit seeing that. “I will get you back for that.” Then her smile grew mischievous and playful. “But on to more serious things. In a couple days, I want you to help my sister adjust to the changes these past thousand years, bring her upto speed. I would like to do it myself, but the needs of the country demand my attention again.” Celestia said dejectedly.
“Things will be different this time around aunty. Ponies enjoy the night hours now. I have no problem helping Aunty Luna.” Cadance gave her aunt an evil grin of her own. “Besides, she can tell me embarrassing stories about you.” Celestia's eyes shrunk to pinpricks and her ears flattened to her skull, forming a frown.
-'AH! So that's where Twilight got that look.'-
After lunch, Cadance helped Shining pack the bulk of Twilight's stuff, ready to be sent to Ponyville. For a mare seemingly obsessed with organisation, she had jumped at the chance to live in Ponyville whilst completely forgetting to take her own belongings. After that, it was quiet chillaxing till bed.
* * * * * *
The following morning, Cadance woke up at her usual time, stretched and yawned. She frowned when her yawn didn't sound right, it was too high for her voice. She rubbed her eyes, and looked around blearily. Her bed seemed bigger. Confused by all this, she put it up to not being awake yet and headed to the bathroom. Once again, everything seemed higher or taller then they should be. As she walked to the bathroom she caught sight of her length mirror nearby. What she saw caused her to stop dead, and her eyes bulged. She ran over and took a long look at her form. She wasn't Cadance anymore. But she knew this form, she’d seen it before.
She. Was. Fluffle. Puff.
It took all of her willpower not to scream to high heavens.
-'HOW!?- How was she Fuffle Puff? It was bad enough being the Pretty Pink Pony Princess but this pink fluff ball?' She sat on her hunches, or at least tried to. She ended up rolling onto her back. -'This is just great.'- She thought back to what she did yesterday that might have caused this. She got up late yesterday after the REALLY long night and party that followed. She went to the dinning room, had lunch with her aunt Celestia where she had that tasty sandwich.......that was there waiting for her. It was a flower sandwich - with blue flowers. Blue. Flowers. -'Well played aunty, well played.'- Now she had to go about find that Supernatural remedies book for the Poison Joke cure.
It didn't take her long to find out she didn't have a copy of the book in her quarters. With a heavy sigh, she went to her desk and hopped onto the chair.
-'Having no magic sucks!'- She thought as she had to grab a quill with her mouth. She was too fluffy to use a hoof. She wrote out a request for the book, and made up a cover story about being ill, and not wanting to spread it to others. She placed the note on the table by the door, pulled the rope for the serving bell, then rushed into her bedroom and closed the door. She waited, and soon she heard the door open.
“Yes Princess?” There was a pause “Prin....” The maid that answered the door spotted the letter. After a few minutes. “I'll get that right away your highness, I hope you’re not too unwell.” Cadance then heard the door open and close again. With nothing else to do, she waited for the maid's return.
Meanwhile she checked out her changed body. While she was visually large, she didn’t feel heavy at all. If anything she felt lighter. She tried jumping, only to find she hit the ceiling. –‘Holy crap, does gravity not care about this body?- After a few minutes of bouncing around, she ended with a triple backflip rather hard, and all of a sudden, a few feathers fell out of her fluff. Deciding to check what else was in there, she stuck a hoof in.
Pillows. What she found was pillows, more and more and more. Slowly running out of floor space, she soon found herself next to the window. She had a perfect view of the garden on a sunny day, but today, she had a clear view of her dear aunty Celestia, sitting down at a table to enjoy some tea and snacks.
The setup was just too perfect.
Using the pillows, she started assembling a pillow cannon. (Don't ask her how she knew how to make one. It's in the Pinkie Pie zone, don't question it.) She was interrupted by the sound of her door opening, then soon closing again. She poked her head out of her bedroom door, and saw the book lying on the table. She had placed another message asking the maid to wait on the other side of the door and she could hear her shuffling outside.
She went through the book to find the entry on the Poison Joke. Once she had it, she wrote down the ingredients, and slipped it under the door for the maid. A muffled 'yes your highness' was heard, and Cadance went back to her cannon. Once completed, she took aim and her aunt. Just as Celestia was about to take a sip of her tea, Cadance pressed the fire button. There was a muffled ‘pomf’, and then a fainter one became impaled on Celestia’s horn. She didn’t even flinch, and resumed drinking her tea. Her staff and guards were all too stunned to act.
IT. IS. ON!
She pressed the fire button multiple times till Celestia was buried in pillows. It was hilarious seeing ponies freak out as their princess was assaulted by pillows. Her giggling was interrupted by the sound of the outer door opening. She stayed quiet as she heard something be set down and the door closing. She opened her bedroom door and saw a basket with the items she requested. She quickly gathered them, and the book, and raced to her bathroom.
After following the instructions CAREFULLY, she dived into the bath (which was more like a jacuzzi). After a few seconds she rose up again and looked down at her right fore hoof. It was normal again, and she sighed in contentment, (Yes it was pink, but she’d come to terms with that years ago. Being FLUFFY pink she couldn’t stand.) She was just about to lean back and enjoy the bath, when her doors burst open and a pair of Royal Guards came in.
“WHAT THE HAY!?” She yelped in surprise. The two guards then looked at her, and at least one had the decency to blush and avert his gaze. (Hey, if I have to be stuck as a girl then I better be a hot one. Of the tomboyish kind.............. DON'T JUDGE ME!)
“Sorry princess, but Princess Celestia was assaulted and we are making sure that the royal family is safe and secure.” Feining concern she asks a question she already knew the answer to.
“Is my aunt okay? What happened?”
“Yes, she is fine. She was assaulted by......pillows.” One guard said. Cadacne gave a 'huh' look before she started laughing.
“Oh That's rich. Tell me, did Shining or my aunt put you up to this?” The two guards just looked confused before saying.
“Your highness we are serious. Princess Celestia was assaulted by pillows.” She eyed them before asking.
“Okay if true, then how is my aunt taking it?”
“Well,” One guard said scratching the back of his neck. “Well some said they heard....giggling under the pillows.”
-'Wow, her life must be really dull if a pillow assault gets her to giggle. I must prank her more then, and I may have help now.'- aloud she said. “Well regardless I am fine so you may return to your duties. Shoo. Go on – get!” With some stuttering they leave, and Cadance went back to enjoying her bath.
* * * * * *
It was early evening when Cadance went to dinner. She had spent a few hours watching poor Shining and the other guards race around trying to find the master of pillows. They won't find her.
Stepping into the dinning room she saw both of her aunts, with Luna still in Woona form. Celestia notices her first.
“Ah, Cadance. I trust you had a good day?” She asked with a knowing glint in her eye.
“Why yes, the story of my great and powerful aunt buried under pillows made my day.” Luna had a look of confusion on her.
“Sister, is pillow burying a new tradition in thine kingdom?”
“No Luna, I believe it was an attempt at revenge for yesterday's lunch surprise.” Cadance took a menu not trusting Celestia to not try anything else.
“Well Poison Joke can backfire if the victim knows how to use it right.” Luna eyed her sister and her niece a couple times before saying.
“Thou is having a prank war with our niece, and thou didn't include us?”
“Well, I kinda did with our meeting aunty. The prank was solely aimed at Celestia. You presented a too good of an opportunity to pass up.” In a dead pan look Luna addressed Celestia.
“Sister, we like our new niece. However, are thee sure she isn't a blood relation to us?” Celestia actually looked at Cadance seriously before answering.
“You know, I'm not so sure anymore.” Cadance's response was to give and impish smirk before going back to the menu. She was just about to place her order when she saw a scroll appear in front of Celestia. Her aunt opened and read it before starting her own letter.
“What is it aunty?” She asked.
“Oh it's just Twilight. I gave her two tickets to the Grand Galloping Gala. However she doesn't want to go without her friends, so I'm going to send seven back to her.”
“Aunty, why are you torturing her? The gala is THE most boring thing the Kingdom does. I'm surprised you endure the thing. That kind of event was never sort of Twilight's thing. Hay, I stopped going years ago.”
“Well I’m hoping they can liven it up this year.” Celestia finished her letter and put the tickets in, and before Cadance could say more it was off. Cadance just face hoofed, and vowed vengeance for the unleashing of Trollestia on her favorite filly.
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Wow, I did not expect this to pop up right after reading the previous chapter.
I guess Cadance will attend the Grand Galloping Gala as well now, since she knows the chaos that will happen. Oh, and not going would be pointless from a story-mechanical standpoint
Cadance has a niece and a sister now? lol I think you meant Luna right?
Fun chapter btw cant wait for the next one!
... She didn't make an orbital pillow cannon? For shame Cadance! Also, it's Flufflepuff. Ain't gotta explain how she got in orbit.
Update!! Yay!
Edit. Can we see prank war part 2? Not necessarily as next chapter, but sometime later would be, I think, better.
While it's not a filler chapter, it has a nice feel to it. It showed how Celestia takes pranks seriously.
I wonder when it will be taken too seriously and result in disaster, minor or major one.
O my this is just to good. and Fluffle. Puff this is a supper good touch.
let the prank war begin.
here is a little treat for every one.
img08.deviantart.net/7396/i/2015/110/0/a/fluffle_puff_s_cutiemark_by_votederpycausemufins-d6hibus.jpg
Harts Fire
Well, reusing comics and memes is fine and good, but kinda unoriginal...
Still, good to read anyway.
I believe that things will be a lot more lively with Cadance this time...
Welp, I have people giving me odd looks as I sit here cackling. Again.
Moreplease.
Only problem I see is the past and present tense mix ups, otherwise great chapter :)
how can twilight be send to ponyville when she is already there?
I want to read about more pranks, like Celestia's coat being dyed blue, or a whoopie cushion with an amplification spell on it to make it sound like Celestia just ripped the loudest one in history. Or something like that.
6377218 fixed
6377711 the prank war will be throughout the story at times.
Moree
this is fantastic 
5979528 Hm in this particular instance no since he essentially died and was reincarnated as a chick, so if she is attracted to guys now that makes her a straight female. On the other had if a guy turned into or took over a females body with the goal of having sex with a guy he was probably gay to begin with but after the transformation/body swap still ends up a straight female.
LOL pillow canon activate. AIM.... FIRE!!!
When I read the line about the spam firing of pillows I kinda expected Lulu to be the one getting hit.
At least there is some variance here. Thats good.
Keep being amazing.
6379296 nah , luna is general safe from pranks unless she teams up with her sister.
6379362
But why wouldn't she team up with cadence? Maybe to get Celestia back for her banishment, (OK probably not that) or things Celestia did to her when they were younger.
Thats just me and what I'd like to see but its up to you.
6379522 I never said that Luna would ever team up with Tia. only that's the only way she won't be safe.
Cadance could solve a lot of problems with a warning letter to Twilight to avoid the gala.
6380031 d'aaawwww
Yus! Great chapter, loved the Fluffle Puff inclusion.
6381457 I figured that was the worst Poison Joke could do to her.
Pffffbbbbbbttt
Loved the update and I look forward to the next!
6382473 Born for Loyalty is next and it's a BIG chapter
6382514 I see
Big updates are always nice to see :)
6381468
I wonder if she would eat poison joke on purpose for Halloween?
6391243 no she won't touch again on purpose. She doesn't want to be Fluffle Puff. EVER again.
6391267
Not even for the Pinkie Pie like powers or to troll ponies and or changelings?
6391280 nope, not worth being seen as the cute pink fuzz ball.
She is working really hard to overcome the cuteness of pink in her normal form.
She's trying to make Cadance into Xena Warrior Princess, being Fluffle Puff would harm that. not to mention trying to communicate.
6391326
.But it wouldn't be her, just a weird fluffy pink pony, right?
6392284 all it would take is one pony seeing her dive into the cure bath. No this is a one time event.
I love seeing this natural banter between them.
So. Awesome.
6394060 which two?
6394065 All three of them... I hope to read more soon.
6394077 Well that's good. Be a bit working on an epic chapter for Born for Loyalty.
6405051 well about to post a new chapter for another story so keep alert.
6405853 Read further.
6405865 That's the PROBLEM though, you're first two or three chapters have to be the hook line sinker. If people come into the story and see something they don't like in the first few chapters they will RARELY continue on to the next few, and even in those cases it's pretty much out of boredom. Your problem is not that people won't read longer, but that they DONT WANT TO. Not shouting by the way, only putting emphasis on those words.
I didn't read farther because i lost interest in your character. I didn't read farther because i no longer wished to know more or experience the story. People downvoted my comment for a multitude of reasons, one might be that they didn't read my disclaimer and thought i was just hating and downvoted your story (i didn't... i have yet to downvote a single story on this site) others might say i was making a biased opinion while still others might allude to the fact that i said i wouldn't read more and was making an uneducated opinion about your story.
I digress, your story obviously holds some appeal as many people have liked it, nothing about that can ever be denied. However, it still stands that i did not find the first two chapters enjoyable and therefore will not find the others enjoyable as well for the simple fact that i will always remember that first two chapter impression.
First impressions mean EVERYTHING and if you wanted me to read more or for him to read more, then you need to give us something to grab on, something interesting. You have not done that with this story.
Again, not saying it's horrible, everyone has different tastes. However i do find your reply as a writer to 'read more' very crude and unneccessary. You might as well have not replied at all. Seriously, as a writer myself i get very in depth with my readers whenever they voice a complaint or concern, i'm a lost cause i know that, but he might still have read your story and enjoyed it. The problem being that you didn't really do anything by saying 'read it'.
That's on the basis of comment etiquette and explanations so i'll not continue. Once again, i wish you the best.
I would just like to point out something
6321202
This, look at the votes. Yeah, some people are unredeemable and should be shot on sight. Seriously, we need that person's IP so we can go to his house and kick him. Hell i even alluded to finding more of your works i might enjoy. Seriously, some people on this fanbase are total ass holes and i don't have enough curse words to fully describe people who downvote comments because of the person who wrote them.
6406025 what more could you want. Trying to think of Dave logically. He just realized he is stuck as Cadance. The chapters are set to show him first adjusting to a pony form and once that is mastered his personality comes out. If you were Dave how would you respond to that situation? Did you expect Nyx to be who she is at the end of her story at the beginning? You do yourself a disservice by not reading further.
This story is more popular then I imagine it would be. So i must be doing something right for people to move past those early chapters to keep them and like them.
6406072 Edit: okay so i kinda just re-read your comment and didn't really answer one of your questions.
I should warn you just like i warn my parents, you NEVER EVER EVER EVER EVER FOREVER EVER ask me this question (the if you were question, not the specific question). Not because i hate it, but because i am a VERY weird person.
First step, identify yourself
"Cadence?"
Second step, pretend to be that 'person'
"Yes?"
Third step, draw it out a bit.
"How do you feel?"
"A bit woozy, my head hurts, what happened?"
Fourth step, after i establish some names and my surroundings i initiate plan Ass hole phase one.
"You got any beer? Actually my first question should be is this body of age? What's the age of maturity here, how can you tell since you're all horses?"
Fifth step, after the following silence, admit your lie and face the consequences, knowing that, if you die, you die laughing.
"Actually let's start from the beginning, hi my name is ____ and i'm currently stuck in a pink pony body. I was male before so my downstairs is looking a bit more empty than normal."
Either
A. You get confusing stares and explain yourself further
B. You get pinned to a wall and accused of being a changeling in which case defened yourself vocally until incinerated or let down.
Edit MK2:
Okay i lied, upon waking up and seeing all the ponies (not knowing they existed) i would stare at them until i looked and found i was a pony then i would scream bloody murder.
After meeting faust i would strangle her senseless and demand to be in a body that's not as girly or be replaced, otherwise i would threaten to paint my room white or some other stupid thing like that, after being denied i would constantly hiss and bare my teeth at everyone until i'm excluded from everyone and then i would happily learn the spell for hiding horn (after figuring out that you can't just saw it off), get my coat and mane dyed, and go off and live peacefully in the countryside. That's not exactly a happy ending so i didn't say it at first. No i'm not a big people or pony person. Any attempt at restraining me would end badly, past depression and secret hatred of myself being taken into account.
Well to be honest, like i said, people have a very different viewpoint on things. What i find absolutely detestable someone else might find to be the most amazing thing in the world while still others might find it only slightly irritating and still others find it amusing and are willing to push past it.
My qualm is that it happened all too quickly. I've already read lots of stories where the human gets turned into a pony, i find the stories to actually be among my favorite due to the human's spontaneous reactions, witty humor, and often times, cursing. This causes a lot of comedy at the expense of the characters.
What more could i want, nobody is perfect and i'll not claim to have the best opinion, but here is mine.
Your beginning is cookie cutter, i think i've said that before.
The human tells us quite immediately that he has no family and nothing to go back to so obviously there's nothing holding him back, which i find to be a missed opportunity as you could reference it via memories or happy memories, like a pony reminding him/her of a special someone.
That part is ignorable, though i find it annoying.
The real kicker is that he just so willingly ditches his previous role with no qualms whatsoever.
When i say qualms i mean... seriously, there really were no questions, he wasn't nearly as curious. He wasn't defensive (another side effect of the 'my life was horrid' plot line). My god, if i suddenly woke up as a pony i'd wonder why, after finding out why i'd wonder why me, after finding that out i'd wonder WHY THE FUCK AM I PINK HOLY SHIT I HAVE A VAGINA WHY AM I TALLER THAN THESE THINGS AND WHY ARE THERE TWO BIGGER PONIES AND THIS ONE SEEMS LIKE MY FRIEND WHO THE HELL ARE ALL THESE PEOPLE!?!?!?!?
*cough* i apologize, long day, and not hard, just Looooooooooooooooooooong. Anyways, as i think my more vocal side has demonstrated, your character really doesn't show any emotion other than 'oh well' and while there are some people out there like that, they are like that mostly because they are hollow shells of what they once were. They are eager to have something else fill them up because they do not want to be themselves. If that's your character then i don't want to read this story as that means it's kinda morbid.
Either way there wasn't enough of what I personally, was looking for.
*wake up*
"Cadence?"
"Who the fuck is cadence?"
"W-wha..."
laughing insues.
I apologize for being a bit of an ass here, but it's not that hard. Given some other comments i've seen you obviously wish to have this be a comedy of sorts, so having some at the beginning to help the reader more establish a likeness in the character would be a benefit, not a hinderance. I really don't see how anybody could find a simple misconception, or a word out of place, or maybe even a hilarious question to faust 'do i have to be that pink or can i dye my fur like... black or something?' to be an overall downgrade on the story.
What i'm saying TL;DR is that i don't identify with your character and honestly you are spending too much time obsessing as to why i don't like it.
Though i will say that i do enjoy the discussions, it's a hobby of mine really, i love discussions and the fact that you are paying attention to a single reader's comments shows a lot more about you than i originally thought, (positive i swear). So overall this conversation really isn't a loss for you.
6406412 then you would like Born for Loyalty more.
This one his life was literally crap which is the irony that ends up as the Alicorn of Love. Born for Loyalty the guy actually had a family that he loved and lost.
6406461 I realize you are getting tired of my antics and long winded posts, i do apologize for defacing your comments section, but you haven't really offered a rebuttal for my argument which is the point of this conversation no?
Anyways, never heard of that story, link me maybe?
Other than that if you have no further comment about what posted near the end (simply making the beginning a little more comedic) then we really have no further area to discuss. I've found that my 'reviews', more like bastardized versions of reviews, are either helpful or somewhat insightful so i don't feel like i've been unfair to you in expressing my point of view and also don't think i stated that i think your story is inherently bad.
Still wish you good luck
6406482 at least you care to feedback even if we disagree in the end.
here's a story that my get you a bit more
http://www.fimfiction.net/story/236850/born-for-loyalty
6406487 Though i might check that out... i fail to see how we disagreed really.
I think we both agree that
A. He really didn't put up much of a hissy fit
B. He slipped into the new shoes (pun intended) quite quickly
C. He had nothing to live for back home.
What i think you mean to say we disagree on is opinions and those don't matter much.
I find that, having
A. means your character really doesn't have much comedic value at the beginning and restricts him more.
B. means that there's no awkward hilarious scene of him learning to fly, walk, talk, not curse, learn everyone's names
C. means there's no 'flashback' chapter, or intermediate points where he or she compares ponies to people he knew, which can be either good or bad.
Maybe i'm dragging this out too long...
6406515 1: he did scream in Royal Canterlot voice for 5 minutes.
2: he does have some trouble learning how to walk on four legs.
3: Later you do see him trying to fight his new bodies instincts and asserts himself more as time goes on.
6406550
A. I WAS USING LETTERS DAMMIT! WHY DID YOU MESS UP MY LETTERS
B. Hmm... must have forgotten about that, however during the faust scene i didn't really see him minding at all that he was pink or putting up any constituencies concerning her 'job' for him
C. Hmm again, must have forgotten, though i can't be blamed since i file away everything under 'i'll forget this now but need it later' category in my brain. Glad you have a little bit of that, but that's only really a small token compared to some of the points i discussed
D. No offense, but that's kinda expected, what i was looking for in the beginning was bit more from him arguing with faust and being a bit more vocal to the ponies and somewhat truthful, fighting the instinct to jump on a erect penius while in heat really isn't all that different from regular mares considering they aren't whores, just means he isn't completely okay with getting fucked.
Unless you meant something else?
E. Sorry i bastardized the comments section on your other story
6406594 no more like finding males hot. As it goes on you see less Cadance and more Xena Warrior Princess.