The Sparkle family are going on vacation. While family holidays are often difficult, Twilight knows this one is going to be particularly bad. Mostly because her father doesn't.
Words cannot describe the level of feels this story insights in me, or how horny it makes me. This chapter was well worth the wait, and I look forward to more.
And so, ladies and gentlecolts, the die is finally cast - this time for real. A mistake made once in ignorance, twice in desperate half-awareness, has been made one more time in the full, terrible, gleaming light of truth.
Only one question remains as the die tumbles along the table, scattering hearts and minds and all else in its wake - just how terrible a price will Fate demand of our dual sinners?
I was so hoping to see this continued and this did not disappoint on any level... It's been a while since I was torn so evenly between lust and anguish. Thank you for this gift, terrible though it is to bare...
... It's just not fair. Something so simple and primal as love should never become such burden on one's mind. The artificial barriers that we place between one another to define ourselves and our relationship to the world around us so often stand between us and what we truly need and desire... a feeling I've come to know all too well of late... That said, when I was younger I would have given anything to be in Twilight's hooves, tied in the desperate embrace of intimacy with the man I loved and trusted more than anyone in the entire world. I hope for her sake that Night Light grows to accept that their love has changed rather than just abandoning it altogether...
So, curious, how does this not have either sad or dark attached to it? They're both very, very damaged here. This ain't ending with a happily ever after unless we wanna ignore all semblance of rational psychology.
5305887 5306604 I took far too long regardless. I definitely want to get the next chapter out quicker than this one, however long that may be.
5306044 Agh! This whole time I thought Night Light had a star inside the moon, not another crescent. The problems with being such a sparsely shown character, I guess.
5306814 While I definitely agree that the characters are very damaged, the dark tag on fimfiction usually refers to a ton of other stuff that doesn't and won't feature here. I haven't put it on because I worry it would attract people who would be disappointed at the lack of that stuff, and put off people who would otherwise enjoy the story. The flashback scene with the other stallion in this chapter is as dark as I'm planing to have this go, though I guess the general depravity throughout still qualifies. The main reason is, like I said, not that I don't think this deserves it, but because it's a different, more psychologically 'dark' story that isn't normally what the tag applies to.
As for Sad, I'm still debating that one. I have my own personal dislike of that tag, but I also have the advantage of foresight and so far the story hasn't deviated so far from my original plans that it warrants tagging. As with any romance (though this is admittedly a little different) there's going to be ups and downs, and we just happen to be at the very bottom of a very steep 'down'. If the story goes much further without picking up I probably will stick a tag on it just to be safe.
5306997 Aw, I was kind of hoping nobody would catch that possibility until I could explore it next chapter. You guys are too quick at stuff like that. There's still one hint nobody seems to have spotted yet though, so hooray for small victories.
FML, man, this was so worth the wait. I agree that this should probably have a [Dark] tag, because this is some seriously messed up psychological shit right here. Granted, the way the tags are defined is pretty limiting, but still. I'm only mildly ashamed that something so mental and deep gets me so bothered under the collar. And other places, but I digress.
when i saw the notification in my updates with the title "mis-shapes" with the author's icon of a changeling next to it i thought this was some changeling fic i had favorited for tracking which left me very confused cause i couldn't think of what fic i had remembered faving would have this kind of update but then it turned out to actually be this fic and then i was happy :D ..... ....ready to cry or at least feel for sure T^T .....
Love this story worth the wait, totally. It's a beautiful masterpiece that gives me so many feels and one being sexy-time feels is great. The ending though, i'm shaking just writing this paragraph... for multiple reasons
good show man, i absolutely love storys that dive deeper into the darker/deviant side of psyche and this is pure gold! cant even fap to it now because im to busy enjoying the plot xD
This chapter was beautifully done. And while it was a long wait, it was definitely worth that wait. Polished and well-thought out, and damn, this was sexy. Okay, it was hot.
And as painful as it may be for the characters, I love how you're maintaining the aspect of realism to such a difficult turn in their relationship. It does add to the eroticism, but more importantly it really makes this a story rather than simple clop. Well done.
5307579 In regards to the whole other hint...Is it, by any chance, the fact that he didn't even lay a hoof on her until he finished, and even afterwards seemed shocked at Twilight hugging him?
5323886 That's mostly just tying in with Twilight's realisation at the end of the chapter. The 'hint' is something Night Light says, but it might be a little tough to spot its meaning until later, if people ever look back at this bit.
We already know the Sparkle marriage is hitting a rough patch, as claimed by Night Light. However, I firmly believe he thinks his marriage is worth saving. Despite him going to that place, I think he went there in order to fool himself into believing it was Velvet.
Judging from the make out session in the bedroom, Night Light is truly trying to repair any problems he has with his marriage. It's hard to judge that from one sex scene and a few fragments of conversation, but I'd bet money on he's not lying in that regard. He loves Velvet, and really wants to spend this vacation to repair those problems he mentioned, but just hit a rocky patch with the hoof cuff place. Getting a little pent up, I believe he wanted to convince himself he was having sex with his wife. As long as he was blindfolded, he could pretend it was her.
I say this because of this last chapter. Now there's no doubt Night Light desires Twilight on an at least physical level. This is supported due to the fact he didn't push her away this time. Not actually looking at Twilight wasn't only him trying to mentally suppress what was going on, he was returning back to that room in his head, back when although he was with another mare, it was still Velvet in his head. Yes, he says Twilight's name, but I think Grimm was trying to pull a fast one. There's Twilight Sparkle, and there's Twilight Velvet. I think he was actually calling out for Velvet in the heat of the moment.
That feels cliffhanger at the end, left my heart empty and It hurts. It's a good hurt though, Grimm. I will wait for the next chapter, as good things come to those who wait.
I don't think I could enjoy the sex scene in the sense that one usually enjoys those kinds of scenes. For me, this fic is enthralling not for the clop but for the plot. The damaged emotions of Twilight and her father and the way that the sex is led up to and plays out makes the thing entirely unerotic for me, which I'm thinking was one of the objectives of the author.
Damn it, Twilight is off her nut. Her actions, her words and her body language make this really dark for her. She refuses to let her father go and goads and guilts him into having sex with her. She's put way to much stock in their first random encounter being a signal of deeper connection; those "I don't forgive you" and "You lied" parts cinch that for me. I think he loves his daughter like any father would, but that love has driven him to acquiesce to her demands and desires in a way that no father should.
And yet while he's given in, he in no way wants it to stick. That much is obvious by him not looking at or holding her. He's a father manipulated by his daughter, as far as I can see it. True, he's probably damaged in some way, but that just adds to his vulnerability. Even during the sex it's almost entirely her taking charge, doing something and him being passive. He's acting as a lightning rod for Twilight's selfish desires.
And yes, Twilight is being unbelievably, irrationally selfish. She's got what she wanted now, but it's not enough. She's wants her father and her in a romantic, passionate relationship, and that's never ever going to happen. I'm just waiting for her to begin overtly blackmailing Night Light, probably with the old "I'll tell Mum" shtick.
I'm hoping for a happy ending, with a return to some semblance of normalcy for the Sparkle Family and for the father-daughter relationship of Night Light and Twilight in particular. But I think this is only going to get worse before it gets better.
PS: I'm kinda weirded out by all the people supporting Twilight and admonishing her dad for not playing a more active part. She's been pretty damn rapey throughout all of this.
PPS: I'm wondering what Night Light's deal was when he was cheating on Velvet at that BDSM place. I mean it can't be for the intimacy or connection with those ponies, since it's just an anonymous, purely carnal fuck-and-leave. I'm guessing its something he did one-time to let of some frustration and steam after a particularly heated argument or rough patch. Maybe counteracting a feeling of impotence he had at home or in the relationship with his wife, as the dominance he had over the mares there probably gave him a feeling of control or empowerment. Maybe it was just some tit-for-tat cheating as revenge on his wife for any unfaithfulness? Who really knows other than the author?
5361757 You're pretty spot on with most of this comment, to be honest. I'm surprised at how many people are wholeheartedly on Twilight's side too, but I like to think that it's largely because the story's entirely from Twilight's perspective and it's hard to see past a POV character's rationalisations (also Twilight's a beloved character so people are naturally sympathetic).
I think it's hard to blame Twilight, though. Yes, she's being selfish, and yes, she's seeing irrational importance in that one event, but even in the first confession Night Light didn't do all that much to dissuade her.
I don't want the characters to fall into black and white 'bad and good', because that's super boring. Part of the reason I stuck entirely with Twilight's viewpoint is that hers is probably the most difficult to understand, and I'm taking the fact that so many seem to be supporting her as a 'win' in that regard. Mostly I wanted to write a story where everyone's not suddenly 100% okay with the fact that it's incest, because personally I don't think that inner turmoil ever gets explored to its fullest potential. Hopefully I can do that while keeping all the characters in that grey area where people can sympathise with their actions even if they disagree. That's the goal, at least.
5362421 I like the idea behind inner turmoil and there isn't always a right answer, but if the Internet has taught me anything its f@ck it. Thank you Internet for destroying my morals.
I'm siding with Twilight. I also call her bluff and raise let's get the whole family involved. You just can't have sex without Cadence! I am suprised Velvet isn't getting any, she's a knockout.
I hate myself for reading this story, I really do. However, ignoring the pornographic content and seeing this as just another piece of literature, this was a well thought-out story. The pacing was impeccable, Night's responses were true-to-life, and the suspense was perfect. The entire mini-arc setting up her desperate lust felt almost like filler, but put in the grand scheme of things shows that you planned out this story from beginning to end, each sentence deliberately set in its place for a reason. I dislike this ship, mainly because this type of incest is a turn-off for me, but the story itself was interesting and amusing at times. Kudos to you for writing a clop-fic that's not just about mindless sex.
I feel awful for Night Light, Sure he made a mistake, But you have to have some pretty shitty luck if of all the ponies you end up screwing ends up being your daughter! But now Twilight Is being possessive of him and is going as far as holding it against him as an excuse to have sex with him.
I understand Twilights Peril (emotionally speaking) but the same must be said for Night Light. For starters his "Dirty Secret" that he thought he had, is out, and he unknowingly had sex with his on daughter. I'm not surprised in the slightest that he didn't sleep for three days! Though what really must have been tearing at him, must have been the knowing that because of Twilights advances from earlier on, it was always going to degenerate into pretty much rape.
Forget the sex, the fuckin molotov cocktail of emotions is overwhelming. And also heavily tying into the pity inducing similarities of something so enjoyable for a person that there's no way they'll let go of it. Funny to think this whole mess could've been avoided by someone keeping their mouth shut.
5509599 He may have been emotionally torn, but that was purely consensual sex. He loves Twilight, even if it wasn't intended to be romantically, and he gave in because she desperately needed him to. He helped create this problem, and he had to help her work through it however he could.
Aw man... This story has so many feels in it... Really beautiful...
And hey! Totally awesome that the chapter's finally out!
Worth the wait. Now I just hope for some sort of resolution, but this needed to happen one way or another.
Words cannot describe the level of feels this story insights in me, or how horny it makes me. This chapter was well worth the wait, and I look forward to more.
This is so, utterly depressing.
5305374 Totally worth the wait. Too bad it took a couple of months though.
And so, ladies and gentlecolts, the die is finally cast - this time for real. A mistake made once in ignorance, twice in desperate half-awareness, has been made one more time in the full, terrible, gleaming light of truth.
Only one question remains as the die tumbles along the table, scattering hearts and minds and all else in its wake - just how terrible a price will Fate demand of our dual sinners?
I found a couple of things you may want to edit.
I pretty sure that Night Light's marks were a pair of crescent moon and not stars.
This is truly a masterpiece. And oh god that last line............. My heart can't take it! TTATT
Rejection at its highest point........
This is the BEST, FYI.
I was so hoping to see this continued and this did not disappoint on any level... It's been a while since I was torn so evenly between lust and anguish. Thank you for this gift, terrible though it is to bare...
... It's just not fair. Something so simple and primal as love should never become such burden on one's mind. The artificial barriers that we place between one another to define ourselves and our relationship to the world around us so often stand between us and what we truly need and desire... a feeling I've come to know all too well of late... That said, when I was younger I would have given anything to be in Twilight's hooves, tied in the desperate embrace of intimacy with the man I loved and trusted more than anyone in the entire world. I hope for her sake that Night Light grows to accept that their love has changed rather than just abandoning it altogether...
This is the best incest fic I've seen in a good long while and it just keeps getting better.
5305887 Never rush a good story.
The wait was worth it. Oh dear sweet Celestia was it worth it. I love this fic so much, and I can't wait for more.
Your work is top quality and this story has been one of the best one this site. Pleas keep doing what your doing!
So, curious, how does this not have either sad or dark attached to it? They're both very, very damaged here. This ain't ending with a happily ever after unless we wanna ignore all semblance of rational psychology.
more more more!
Twilight... Velvet?
Oh... Poor Twily.
As others said before, the wait was totally worthy. This chapter is so.... so full of emotions for both Night Light and Twilight. It's just perfect.
I can't wait to see how this is gonna end, but also I'm afraid of the very possible sad/bad ending.
5305887
5306604
I took far too long regardless. I definitely want to get the next chapter out quicker than this one, however long that may be.
5306044
Agh! This whole time I thought Night Light had a star inside the moon, not another crescent. The problems with being such a sparsely shown character, I guess.
5306450
THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST
Seriously though, thanks a lot!
5306814
While I definitely agree that the characters are very damaged, the dark tag on fimfiction usually refers to a ton of other stuff that doesn't and won't feature here. I haven't put it on because I worry it would attract people who would be disappointed at the lack of that stuff, and put off people who would otherwise enjoy the story. The flashback scene with the other stallion in this chapter is as dark as I'm planing to have this go, though I guess the general depravity throughout still qualifies. The main reason is, like I said, not that I don't think this deserves it, but because it's a different, more psychologically 'dark' story that isn't normally what the tag applies to.
As for Sad, I'm still debating that one. I have my own personal dislike of that tag, but I also have the advantage of foresight and so far the story hasn't deviated so far from my original plans that it warrants tagging. As with any romance (though this is admittedly a little different) there's going to be ups and downs, and we just happen to be at the very bottom of a very steep 'down'. If the story goes much further without picking up I probably will stick a tag on it just to be safe.
5306997
Aw, I was kind of hoping nobody would catch that possibility until I could explore it next chapter. You guys are too quick at stuff like that. There's still one hint nobody seems to have spotted yet though, so hooray for small victories.
FML, man, this was so worth the wait. I agree that this should probably have a [Dark] tag, because this is some seriously messed up psychological shit right here. Granted, the way the tags are defined is pretty limiting, but still. I'm only mildly ashamed that something so mental and deep gets me so bothered under the collar. And other places, but I digress.
Dat wham line, though...
5307579
Sorry about that
Worth the wait, let me say. Worth it.
And seriously Night, look at your daughter while she ruts the fuck outta you! I mean come on man, show some respect!
Geez, I can't even clop. It's too powerful. Amazing work.
when i saw the notification in my updates with the title "mis-shapes" with the author's icon of a changeling next to it i thought this was some changeling fic i had favorited for tracking which left me very confused cause i couldn't think of what fic i had remembered faving would have this kind of update
but then it turned out to actually be this fic and then i was happy :D .....
....ready to cry or at least feel for sure T^T .....
Love this story worth the wait, totally. It's a beautiful masterpiece that gives me so many feels and one being sexy-time feels is great. The ending though, i'm shaking just writing this paragraph... for multiple reasons
ooooo dat scandal at the end there lol.....
Wow that was, really bloody good I couldnt stop reading at all it was mesmerising.
very good sir.
holy shit this was way worth the wait
good show man, i absolutely love storys that dive deeper into the darker/deviant side of psyche and this is pure gold! cant even fap to it now because im to busy enjoying the plot xD
A very hot chapter. But a bit of a warning if its not something you intended, I get a murder/suicide vibe coming from this stories future.
5311061 Yandere, man
This chapter was beautifully done. And while it was a long wait, it was definitely worth that wait. Polished and well-thought out, and damn, this was sexy. Okay, it was hot.
And as painful as it may be for the characters, I love how you're maintaining the aspect of realism to such a difficult turn in their relationship. It does add to the eroticism, but more importantly it really makes this a story rather than simple clop. Well done.
Just read it.
Thinking about what that conversation would be like.
5307579
In regards to the whole other hint...Is it, by any chance, the fact that he didn't even lay a hoof on her until he finished, and even afterwards seemed shocked at Twilight hugging him?
5323886
That's mostly just tying in with Twilight's realisation at the end of the chapter. The 'hint' is something Night Light says, but it might be a little tough to spot its meaning until later, if people ever look back at this bit.
I hear that train a comin', and I'm not going to like it when it arrives. Because I think I know why Night Light acted so awkward during the sex.
Okay, here's my theory.
We already know the Sparkle marriage is hitting a rough patch, as claimed by Night Light. However, I firmly believe he thinks his marriage is worth saving. Despite him going to that place, I think he went there in order to fool himself into believing it was Velvet.
Judging from the make out session in the bedroom, Night Light is truly trying to repair any problems he has with his marriage. It's hard to judge that from one sex scene and a few fragments of conversation, but I'd bet money on he's not lying in that regard. He loves Velvet, and really wants to spend this vacation to repair those problems he mentioned, but just hit a rocky patch with the hoof cuff place. Getting a little pent up, I believe he wanted to convince himself he was having sex with his wife. As long as he was blindfolded, he could pretend it was her.
I say this because of this last chapter. Now there's no doubt Night Light desires Twilight on an at least physical level. This is supported due to the fact he didn't push her away this time. Not actually looking at Twilight wasn't only him trying to mentally suppress what was going on, he was returning back to that room in his head, back when although he was with another mare, it was still Velvet in his head. Yes, he says Twilight's name, but I think Grimm was trying to pull a fast one. There's Twilight Sparkle, and there's Twilight Velvet. I think he was actually calling out for Velvet in the heat of the moment.
Well, that's what I got.
Ouch
That feels cliffhanger at the end, left my heart empty and It hurts. It's a good hurt though, Grimm. I will wait for the next chapter, as good things come to those who wait.
This was so SO good! I only regret that I can't favorite it twice!
I don't think I could enjoy the sex scene in the sense that one usually enjoys those kinds of scenes. For me, this fic is enthralling not for the clop but for the plot. The damaged emotions of Twilight and her father and the way that the sex is led up to and plays out makes the thing entirely unerotic for me, which I'm thinking was one of the objectives of the author.
Damn it, Twilight is off her nut. Her actions, her words and her body language make this really dark for her. She refuses to let her father go and goads and guilts him into having sex with her. She's put way to much stock in their first random encounter being a signal of deeper connection; those "I don't forgive you" and "You lied" parts cinch that for me. I think he loves his daughter like any father would, but that love has driven him to acquiesce to her demands and desires in a way that no father should.
And yet while he's given in, he in no way wants it to stick. That much is obvious by him not looking at or holding her. He's a father manipulated by his daughter, as far as I can see it. True, he's probably damaged in some way, but that just adds to his vulnerability. Even during the sex it's almost entirely her taking charge, doing something and him being passive. He's acting as a lightning rod for Twilight's selfish desires.
And yes, Twilight is being unbelievably, irrationally selfish. She's got what she wanted now, but it's not enough. She's wants her father and her in a romantic, passionate relationship, and that's never ever going to happen. I'm just waiting for her to begin overtly blackmailing Night Light, probably with the old "I'll tell Mum" shtick.
I'm hoping for a happy ending, with a return to some semblance of normalcy for the Sparkle Family and for the father-daughter relationship of Night Light and Twilight in particular. But I think this is only going to get worse before it gets better.
PS: I'm kinda weirded out by all the people supporting Twilight and admonishing her dad for not playing a more active part. She's been pretty damn rapey throughout all of this.
PPS: I'm wondering what Night Light's deal was when he was cheating on Velvet at that BDSM place. I mean it can't be for the intimacy or connection with those ponies, since it's just an anonymous, purely carnal fuck-and-leave. I'm guessing its something he did one-time to let of some frustration and steam after a particularly heated argument or rough patch. Maybe counteracting a feeling of impotence he had at home or in the relationship with his wife, as the dominance he had over the mares there probably gave him a feeling of control or empowerment. Maybe it was just some tit-for-tat cheating as revenge on his wife for any unfaithfulness? Who really knows other than the author?
5361757
You're pretty spot on with most of this comment, to be honest. I'm surprised at how many people are wholeheartedly on Twilight's side too, but I like to think that it's largely because the story's entirely from Twilight's perspective and it's hard to see past a POV character's rationalisations (also Twilight's a beloved character so people are naturally sympathetic).
I think it's hard to blame Twilight, though. Yes, she's being selfish, and yes, she's seeing irrational importance in that one event, but even in the first confession Night Light didn't do all that much to dissuade her.
I don't want the characters to fall into black and white 'bad and good', because that's super boring. Part of the reason I stuck entirely with Twilight's viewpoint is that hers is probably the most difficult to understand, and I'm taking the fact that so many seem to be supporting her as a 'win' in that regard. Mostly I wanted to write a story where everyone's not suddenly 100% okay with the fact that it's incest, because personally I don't think that inner turmoil ever gets explored to its fullest potential. Hopefully I can do that while keeping all the characters in that grey area where people can sympathise with their actions even if they disagree. That's the goal, at least.
5362421
I like the idea behind inner turmoil and there isn't always a right answer, but if the Internet has taught me anything its f@ck it. Thank you Internet for destroying my morals.
I'm siding with Twilight. I also call her bluff and raise let's get the whole family involved. You just can't have sex without Cadence! I am suprised Velvet isn't getting any, she's a knockout.
Anyway great story so far.
I hate myself for reading this story, I really do. However, ignoring the pornographic content and seeing this as just another piece of literature, this was a well thought-out story. The pacing was impeccable, Night's responses were true-to-life, and the suspense was perfect. The entire mini-arc setting up her desperate lust felt almost like filler, but put in the grand scheme of things shows that you planned out this story from beginning to end, each sentence deliberately set in its place for a reason. I dislike this ship, mainly because this type of incest is a turn-off for me, but the story itself was interesting and amusing at times. Kudos to you for writing a clop-fic that's not just about mindless sex.
I love this. The build up was well worth the wait. Can't wait to see what happens next!
I feel awful for Night Light, Sure he made a mistake, But you have to have some pretty shitty luck if of all the ponies you end up screwing ends up being your daughter! But now Twilight Is being possessive of him and is going as far as holding it against him as an excuse to have sex with him.
I understand Twilights Peril (emotionally speaking) but the same must be said for Night Light. For starters his "Dirty Secret" that he thought he had, is out, and he unknowingly had sex with his on daughter. I'm not surprised in the slightest that he didn't sleep for three days! Though what really must have been tearing at him, must have been the knowing that because of Twilights advances from earlier on, it was always going to degenerate into pretty much rape.
How is he staying sane!
Forget the sex, the fuckin molotov cocktail of emotions is overwhelming.
And also heavily tying into the pity inducing similarities of something so enjoyable for a person that there's no way they'll let go of it.
Funny to think this whole mess could've been avoided by someone keeping their mouth shut.
5531012
But then this wouldn't be as sexy.
There is so much feels in this... Feeeeeeelss...
5509599 He may have been emotionally torn, but that was purely consensual sex. He loves Twilight, even if it wasn't intended to be romantically, and he gave in because she desperately needed him to. He helped create this problem, and he had to help her work through it however he could.
moar!!!!!!!!