Twiluna Fan(clop?)fic. Twi and Luna magically bound to each other. Gryphons massing at the borders. Chrysalis trying to get back into Equestria. Discord being Discord. Canterlot Nobles trying to tear Princess Twi's authority apart. YAY!
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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I see we're not finished torturing Rarity yet. And I see that the reasoning for it is just as threadbare and pointlessly sadistic as it was before.
I still kinda like this story, but several plot-points, this one in particular, are so toxic that they are overshadowing what good this story has to offer. At this point, my experience reading this is still barely a net positive, and I'd like to keep it that way.
I'm out.
8517658
Yeah I stopped seriously reading this for the same reason. I keep trying to get back in to it but....
8517658 8517777 Thank you both for your feedback, and for sticking with this for as long as you have, I do appreciate the time you've given this story.
Ugh, this is why I don't like nurses. I'm oddly interested in the diamond dog pack. That could make an interesting little side story or what have you telling the tale of how they got their territory.
hahahahahaa love this story
Ya... if I’m Rairity I’m not forgiving Rainbowdash for a looooooong ass time.
The whole corrupted element thing kinda threw me for a loop,
8517658
I still love that Rainbow's attempt at murder isn't even a social faux-pas, let alone a crime. But a third-party sabotaging your prank? BLOOD PRICE.
8519042 Trust me, there is going be significant awkwardness/waterfalls of tears/arguments/group hugs/squeaker-bat brawls before all is said and done.
I said it before, and I'll say it again: When I first charted out the rough draft of Sympathy, I sat down and wondered which of the five remaining Element Bearers (given that Twilight had ascended to alicorn stats) would not only provide the biggest gut-punch to 'lose' their Element, but how would they survive the loss, and how would it affect the group as a whole.
Rarity ended up, after a very long mental struggle between picking her, Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie for the unfortunate role of lame duck, because not only had she showed significant non-generous actions in the show up until the 'divergence' between my little fanfic and the actual show, but because unlike the other two, if Rarity fell off the friendship wagon and things went sour between her and the rest of the girls, she wouldn't be crippled, financially, socially or otherwise. She's also shown a rather noticeable gap between her long-term goals, joining the elite in Canterlot, and being Generous, and let's be honest Canterlot's nobility are a bunch of selfish ponut-suckers at the best of times, and even if Rarity had made it into their ranks, odds are the Element of Generosity would have exploded in her face sooner rather than later.
The fact it was aiming to make her self-destruct simply adds a whole new twist to the saga.
She's not living with the Cakes, so she has her own roof over her own head, while Pinkie is not only a boarder but has shown a tendency to turn into a paranoid delusional mess if and when she 'loses' friends, and the last thing we needs is an undercurrent of 'Cupcakes' in an already dark fanfiction.
She's not aspiring to join the Wonderbolts like Rainbow Dash is, one of the most heavily-scrutinized groups in the country and, as we've now learned, are also home to at least two members of the Royal Agents, who are investigating corrupt Pegasi in Cloudsdale belonging to the ancient bloodlines ... which would put Rainbow Dash in significant trouble due to her bravado and the fact her parents live in Cloudsdale and are cloud cuckoolanders on a league of their own.
With all the intrigue and spiteful maneuvers in Canterlot, even if Rarity 'lost' her place on the team, given her connections and her relative fame, faking it until she made it into the ranks of at least the lesser nobility would be well within her reach. That said, while Rarity is going to eventually be off doing her own thing and proving that she's not some puppet, and that she doesn't need to hang onto the other girls to be something special, they aren't going to cut ties over what happened with the Cake's cake, it's just going to make the air rather awkward for a while.
8519145 making a new post because holy **** the other one was a long bastard.
The reason that people get confused about the differences in punishment is because A) I didn't explain it well enough and B) people don't look at the undercurrent.
Consider that Ponies are, as equines, a race that goes into a annual breeding frenzy in spring to early summer. Mares, regardless of sexual orientation, become extremely receptive towards Stallions, and Stallions in turn, regardless of their sexual orientation, become very receptive towards Mares. It's Hormone Hell.
Now, consider that Princess Celestia, being a massive softy towards children and desperately trying to bludgeon the three feuding tribes into civilized beings, the same three tribes who almost froze the entire world into a solid ice-cube because of their genocidal feud that spawned the Windegoes and drove the survivors across the roof of the world and into the lands that would eventually be called Equestria. She and Luna have had to develop laws from the ground up, from a feudalistic state that the tribes were accustomed to to the more modern interpretations that is far more what she wants the mortals to uphold.
Obviously, laws that can both excuse individuals who are unfortunately forced into situations where their biology takes over their conscious minds, and laws that can suitably punish those who would abuse said situations to satisfy sexual appetites regardless of their unwilling partner(s) desires, have been put into place. Laws that would likewise come down like the literal fist of god on pedophilic individuals would be foremost on Celestia's to-do list in this regard.
Rainbow Dash certainly assaulted Rarity, and while she might have got a lighter sentence due to the aphrodisiacs affecting her mental state, she did commit assault on an otherwise innocent party.
Rarity and the Cakes, on the other hand (hoof?) were responsible for one of those situations that falls under the 'predatory sexual assault' laws, even if it was done accidentally, and would likely have been sent to Horseshoe Bay prison as well as having a heinous criminal record attached to their names that, if not already crippling their businesses, then would have destroyed them socially and probably prevented them from ever opening or operating a business anywhere near where a school or places where children congregate.
Rainbow assaulted another adult while under mind-altering substances she had been unwillingly exposed to.
The Cakes and, to a lesser extent Rarity, were involved in a prank that resulted in three adults and three under-aged individuals being poisoned with aphrodisiacs, one of those adults then went out and had we're-pretty-sure-it-was-consensual sex two other adults while in a state where Applejack would have had sex with anything that stood still after the count of three.
And Nurse Redheart, despite her perpetually sour disposition, has a duty of care as a member of the medical profession. If Luna and Twilight hadn't stepped in to settle the matter quietly, Redheart would have been compelled by law to report the Cakes, Rarity, and possibly Applejack if Zecora or Fluttershy had made a complaint about what she did to them, and holy shit would things have gone down the crapper for all and sundry.
8519485
Okay, last one. Promise.
The problem is, if Equestrian standards of justice are supposed to reflect those that exist in developed countries in the 'real world,' then Rarity can't realistically be charged, because what she did wouldn't be illegal. There's even a pretentious latin legal maxim people use to describe the principle: 'Actus reus non facit reum nisi mens sit rea.' The Cakes would likely be slapped with charges related to the use of controlled substances, but the same would be true for them regarding the "predatory sexual assault" charges. Luna's attempt to paint this all in a more sinister light would get laughed out of every court in the modern world. And that goes double for Redheart's complaints this chapter.
More importantly, my problem isn't so much that Rarity is threatened with false charges, and then bullied into a settlement by a trusted authority figure. It's that on top of all this, her and her friends are acting just OoC enough that the conflict that arises feels fake. To be blunt, as it stands, I don't want them to reconcile, because any reconciliation I can imagine would feel just as cheap and insincere as the incident that started the whole thing.
I'm almost afraid of what Rarity will be like once she's able to move again.
8519485
Rarity attempted a good-faith harmless prank that was sabotaged by apparently psychopathic bakers, and got roundly shat on for it. RBD searched the entire town for Rarity after the effects of the cake had worn off, with intent to do her grievous bodily harm, and succeeded in this (honestly what she did should've been instantly lethal, given how it was described), and got...a minor scheduling bump? And literally none of her friends' attitudes toward RBD changed even slightly in the immediate aftermath of her attempted murder of one of their mutual friends, as if it didn't even happen. She was shooting the breeze with AJ in the immediate aftermath of events.
Now that it comes out that Rarity was also under the effects of mind control, I have to wonder if she's going to be getting an official apology...
8520679
The problem with rarity's situation in regards to the start of it, is that she didn't provide proper instructions on how the product was to be produced and delivered, the cakes recieved a vague statement that can be interpreted and misinterpreted any number of ways,
"Give them something to keep them awake all night."
add stimulents "to keep them awake all night.",
add apphrodesiacts "to keep them awake all night.",
Add Laxitives "to keep them awake all night.",
add 'magical potion alternative' "to keep them awake all night.",
add ipecac "to keep them awake all night.",
add Alcohol "to keep them awake all night.",[that was a joke, ha, ha, fat chance.]
Ect.
Suffice to say the Order should not have been left to interpretation, that is the firs mistake, the second was on the professional, in their case, the Cakes should have ignored the special request that was vaguely worded as something to keep the Apples awake all night, and instead make a regular dessert cake that would have added a bit of extra sugar to their systems for the crusaders to crash on later, instead they tried to do what many modern companies do and attempt to interpred the directions to the best of their abilities without all of the needed information on the situation that they were getting into, and instead of sending an apphrodesiac laced cake to an adult party at the apples farm, "which should have been the first red flag since the apples are upstanding folks and would never debase their pride by having adult orgies on their properties like the nobles of Canterlot. " they end up sending it to a sleep over with the Apples, Rainbow Dash, and the CMC.
modern law would dictate that the business would recieve all of the blame, because they would be the ones responsible for misinterpreting the order, and the person who orders the product or service would be unchallenged because they are supposedly innocent of any mischief or wrong doing. however this does not work in a world where magic is on the table since misinterpretations are far more common when a vaguely worded statement has more solutions that are left to the imagination than in reality where the solutions can be grounded on science at the very least. and I imagine that Rarity must have done this particular prank at least once before to another pony or group of ponies otherwise Mrs cake would not have changed Mr.cakes correct assumption to begin with.
Though I agree with you on the case of Rainbow Dash she got off rather too lightly for her assault on Rarity, she should have atleast gotten a restraining order from Rarity, if not more. Also as an afterthought they should not have gone to Twilight who is not in the best of conditions mentally at the moment.
I have read many stories and professionally written books, but i keep gravitating towards the dresden files.
Jim butcher literraly beats the hell out of Harry every book before his redemption/success. Sometimes just for the hell of it. But in the end, harry does get rewarded.
That Rarity will get better off than she was? No doubt there. Honestly she is now more comedy than anything, but now she has a chance to grow. To become more. To explore more.
And i have just reread through the story, and i think i can see some things being hinted at how many bullets twilight has been dodging.
1. During her ascension, what would getting pregnant do? Yeah that. An immortally pregnant goddess housing a child of both genders and the element of magic? The question then is she always pregnant and the baby sharing in the immortality, never birthed? Let us call that the nope end.
2. Constant ramping stress without a release? That could have the affect of making her an immortally paranoid goddess of magic. Insane and striking those who stress her out.
3. Half succupony/herm pony. Goddess of magic and fertility. Consent not as important. Bad end.
I could go on, but wow.
Suffice to say, thank you for writing this! Having fun with it. And Rarity arc could have been so wonderfully dark, but i like the comedy it is easing into as well.
People arguing law and ethics about a porn story written about a cartoon show originally meant for young girls... I find that funnier than anything else in the comments.
While the Rarity side story seems a little harsh, I think the humor of the situation more than cancels out the moral ramifications. I enjoy the story for what it is, porn with a plot. At least it isn't pizza guys getting paid in sex level of plot.
8523193
With all due respect, I am pretty sure that Rarity specified what she meant by "keep them up".
In fact, I remember the bakers' dialoguestrongly implyingthat she specifiedparticular ingredients, and in fact ingredientsbest-known for their stimulant effects, and left the bakers with the task of including them all and not making the cake taste horrible (that was what was giving Mr Cake trouble, the fact that the cake would taste horrible).It was Cup who decided that the order was ambiguous and that she should interpret it to mean something completely different.
From Ch35
From Ch36
--------
Actually:
From Ch33
Rarity does not mention particular ingredients, but she does strongly hint that she intends for the cake to be served to children, and specifically mentions that the CMCs will be present when the cake is eaten.
On another note: The cake was huge, wasn't it? Did Mrs Cake think Rarity was trying to seduce the entire squadron?