The Pinkie

by Three-Patch-Problem

Quoth the Pinkie

Once Upon A Nightmare Night dreary, While I wrote reports, weak and weary,

To the Ruler of Equestria, Princess Celestia, my mentor--

While I focused, on my studies, about the things I learned from my buddies, suddenly there came a knocking,

As if somepony gently rocking, rocking against my library door.

"Probably a trick-or-treater," I muttered, "rocking against my library door-

Only this and nothing more."

Ah, distinctly I looked over, on that cold and bleak October;

And the dying wind, moaning like a forgotten ghost outside my door.

Eagerly I wished the the morrow; vainly I had sought to borrow

From my books void of sorrow, of the conquer of chaos galore-

For the rare and bizarre draconequus whom was given the name Discord.

Nameless here for evermore.

And the silken, sad, uncertain tapping of each purple curtain

Thrilled and made me more and more uncertain, my heart filled with terror

of which I had never felt before. My books did not provide me comfort anymore.

So that now, to still the beating of my heart, I stood repeating

"It's some visitor, asking entrance at my library door-

Some late visitor, entreating entrance at my library door;

That it is and nothing more."

Presently my soul grew stronger; hesitating then no longer,

"Sir," said I, "or Ma'am, truly your forgiveness I implore;

But the fact is I was writing, and so gently you came knocking,

And so faintly you came rocking, rocking against my library door,

That I was sure, how could somepony want to rock against my library door,

That I scarce was sure I heard you"- here I opened the door;-

Darkness there and nothing more.

Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there wondering, fearing,

Doubting, dreaming dreams no mare ever dared to dream before;

But the silence was unbroken, and the stillness gave no token,

And the only word there spoken was the whispered word, "Discord?"

This I whispered, as an the word was spoken back in a voice never heard before, "Discord?"

Merely this and nothing more.

Back into the library turning, all my soul within me burning,

And I wondering if this was simply heart burn from the burritos I remorse.

Soon I heard a rocking somewhat louder than before.

"Surely," said I, "surely that is Spike returning from trick-or-treating night of lore.

Let me see, then, what is that, and this mystery I explore;

It's probably the wind and nothing more.

Open here I flung the shutter, when, with a flirty look and flutter,

In there stepped a pink mare of the Ponyville days of yore;

Not the slightest sound made she; not a minute stopped or stayed she;

But with the grace of a lord or lady, perched on my glass door,

Perched upon the bust of Princess Celestia just above my balcony door,

Perched and sat, and nothing more.

Then this bright pink mare, transforming my sad face to smiling,

By the odd and cheerful countenance it wore,

"Though free candy hath been offered, you've come to visit this mare who hath laundered,

many a night with no restrain, I had hoped to come and visit once again.

Ghastly dressed as a raven upon my balcony door,

On this most wonderful of nights, Tell me what your wish is and allow me to make it so"

Quoth the Pinkie "Candy low."

Much I marveled at my feathered friend to hear discourse so plainly,

Though it's answer little meaning- little reverance it bore;

For we cannot help agreeing that no living pony being

Ever yet was so blessed with seeing a mare above her balcony door-

Bird or beast upon the sculptured bust above her balcony she soared,

With such a phrase as "Candy Low."

But the Pinkie, sitting lonely on the bright purple bust, spoke only

That one phrase, as if her soul in that one word did it reside.

Nothing farther then she uttered- not a feather then she fluttered-

Till I scarcely more than muttered "Other friends have flown before-

On the morrow she will leave me, as my hopes have flown before."

And then Pinkie looked up at me with hollow eyes and flat pink hair,

She spoke to words, quietly just so,

Quoth the Pinkie "Candy Low."

Startled by this sweet odd plea, she looked on patiently

As I pondered what could this mean, this odd phrase

"Candy Low?" I paced as she waited, her smile ever disappearing,

Replaced by a look of anger and depression,

I was comforted by the thought that this was just a phase.

She grumbled gibberish under her breath,

And looked ready to face her death,

Upon my balcony door.

But the Pinkie still softly groaning,

Straight I wheeled a cushioned seat in front of the mare, and bust and door;

Then, upon a velvet sinking, I brought forth some tea for drinking,

And Pinkie's smile grew as she saw the sugar bowl.

I began to realize, I was hungry,

As from my stomach, came a rumbling,

I used my magic to summon some biscuits from behind the pantry door,

Quoth the Pinkie, "Candy Low."

---

Spike walked into the library, after thanking Applejack for taking himself and the Cutie Mark Crusaders out for

trick-or-treating, he picked up his bag, heavy with candy and dragged it in. He felt something was wrong so he ran into Twilight's room to see her looking frazzled on the floor.The window was open, and there was sugar covering everything.

"Twilight, what happened in here?" Spike yelled. Twilight continued to mutter and run her hooves through her tail.

Spike bopped her on the head with his broom, and she stared at him. He felt weird, he smelled burnt sugar, and felt breath on his neck. He turned around to see Pinkie Pie holding an ax. He screamed and dropped his precious candy bag.

Pinkie grabbed in and dumped the bag, wrappers and all, in her large mouth. Spike fell to the floor, leaning his head back, he released a loud scream that could be heard all over Equestria.

"NO!!!"

The End.

Author's Note:

I hope you enjoyed!

Comments

[Dan]

I love you, you magnificent SOB.

[Ephemeral Prose]

Hate to be this nitpicky, but with poetry it's kinda relevant. Your meter with the mock raven poem is totally off. This isn't to say most of it isn't clever, but it definitely felt lacking in that regard.

[Three-Patch-Problem]

4399866 Eh, It was made thanks to a dare and a birthday present to a friend. Her favorite character is Pinkie Pie and her favorite poem is The Raven, so I'm sorry if you or anyone else finds it disappointing. I made it in a day, I was running short on time before her birthday, and I wanted to email it to her, I thought I'd post it here too. So there's some back story if you wanted a reason. Also I had some trouble coming up with enough rhymes for the parody.
And I believe that nobody, especially me, could match Edgar Allan Poe's genius.

Your Faithful Author,
Three-Patch-Problem.

[Three-Patch-Problem]

4399777 Thank you very much! *hugs*