Fluttershy's Birthday and what happened a few months later

Fluttershy's First Birthday since her wedding! Everypony's excited! Discord has some big plans for the big day, but Fluttershy's got a big surprise for him herself..... Find out in Fluttershy's Birthday!

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Comments ( 12 )

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durandana

durandana #1 · Jan 30th, 2014 · · ·

Chaos-Sonata

Chaos-Sonata #2 · Jan 30th, 2014 · · ·

Kinda rushed but I love it!

DisneyFanatic23

DisneyFanatic23 #3 · Jan 30th, 2014 · · ·

The other, however, was the exact opposite, She had a pink coat with a white and purple mane and her eyes, were magenta and swirly, like a lollipop, she also had Discord's powers.

Wait a minute...
Screwball, right? Love her!

Three-Patch-Problem

Three-Patch-Problem #4 · Jan 30th, 2014 · · ·

Sorry It was so rushed! School night my apologies if you all are right now. This is my first story , but they say practice makes perfect..
>>>>>DisneyFanatic23: Yes that is Screwball, I put that in to see if anypony would notice.
So Congrats!

fluttershy1121

fluttershy1121 #5 · Feb 1st, 2014 · · ·

"Excuse me Discord" she said as she ran to the bathroom and proceeded to vomit

Needs to be a period there at the end.

"I'm pregnant! With twin fillies!"she said annoyed at his lack of attentiveness.

Before this, there needs to be space.

"Happy Birthday My little Pony."

Between Birthday and my, there needs to be a comma.

Discord asked from outside the bathroom door."Yes. I'm fine, I must have eaten something odd last night."

Between the period and the quote, SPACE!

That is not all, but there is a lot more errors in this story. And it fells kind of rushed. But I am liking this story!

Three-Patch-Problem

Three-Patch-Problem #6 · Feb 2nd, 2014 · · ·

>>>Fluttershy1121: Thanks! Again, this is my first story, so thank you for not being rude about corrections. I really hope to get better at this! Guess I'll be editing tonight, haha!

Brony God