Don't Buck With my Heart
Chapter 10
Don't Buck With my Heart
A school bell rings in my ears briefly. I can’t believe what I am seeing. I’m in what looks like an elementary school classroom.
“I’m...I’m at school?” I ask out loud putting my hands on my desk. “H-h-hands...” A flood of relief washes over me. ”It was all just a dream...but why...am I at school? And...Why am I talking to myself out loud?”
I had graduated almost twenty years ago and elementary school was like a dusty fossil of my childhood.
And what a rather unpleasant example of a fossil. The sharp teeth of memories from a time long past drudged themselves out of the beds that they had been laid in.
Had anyone seen me as a child, they would most likely think several things.
“That kid is going to blow something up someday.”, “How can they carry all those books and papers?”, “Why is he always running?” or “Ugh, he smells like he needs a shower, does he even use deodorant?”. As a kid I was the star of my very own “after school special” as it would be. I was a geeky kid with an understanding of way too many things that just weren’t my grade level. That might have been what made it so hard to fit in. And when that happened I would start to grow frustrated and worried. This would normally be followed by some sort of temper tantrum and the inability to fully express why I was so flustered.
I would spend hours on end on the floor of the library in either the science, comics, young adult, or fantasy sections. There I would be in my own little world, exploring various topics.
Science, physics, the paranormal, biology, comic books, books that contained political cartoons and ‘How to Draw’ books. These were my friends growing up. When I was failing to adapt to normal school classes as other kids were meant to, my mother decided that I should be in special education. I didn’t care when it was happening, but later in life, I felt that it was unnecessary. When I hit middle school and felt that I didn’t need these classes, I confronted the teachers and my mother about it. They gave me nothing but the excuses that I had been given the entire time I had been in elementary school. Each one was kinda different from the rest, but I noticed a downward trend in the quality of excuses they used on me. Three main excuses to be exact.
“Special Ed isn’t for just the handicapped, it is also for kids who might be more intelligent than others in their classes. For ‘special’ kids.”
“You have A.D.D.”
And finally “You have an attitude problem.”
High school I decided that I had enough of it. I told my teachers and mom that I didn’t want this anymore. I didn’t belong in these classes. I was smarter than this. Secretly I always felt that I was smarter than this and my mother only had put me in the classes because she couldn’t understand me.
Looking back as an adult, I still think it was something like that, but there might be a few flaws in my logic. However I still didn’t think that the classes helped me any. After all, when I got out of high school, I was ill prepared for the world in any way shape, or form. Getting a job was difficult, I found that interacting with people was hard, so I was SOL when it came most any form of social interaction. I had to learn things that I was meant to learn in elementary school shortly after graduation.
I think that was what drew me to My Little Ponies: Friendship is Magic as an adult. Even years later, I could relate to Twilight Sparkle in a way that just struck a cord. She was a lone recluse who just didn’t fit in and was always studying. Always with her head in the books and always trying to learn something new. While the show was on, I found community with other bronies. I didn’t feel that I had to hide anything. When the show came to a close, I was a little more disappointed and devastated than I let on.
I.. guess I let my depression hurt my girlfriend more than I thought...
But now it seems, somehow, I am back in elementary school. I am sat in this mellow yellow desk, atop which there is a number 2 pencil and a bright shining apple for the teacher. In what looks like a standard classroom, I can’t help but feel a might bit unnerved.
“There’s something odd about this that I can’t quite place.” I say out loud.
Instead of a standard frame around the chalkboard, there is almost a whimsical gold frame with three diamond shapes over the top. The walls are a dusty wine colour and are decorated with odd banners, paper stars, moons, and crude little drawings. The sound of chattering comes from the other side of the classroom door. As it opens a womanly teacher’s voice sings out.
“Alright students, in an orderly manner, single file, no pushing please!”
I felt the need to hide behind the desk I was seated at. After all it seemed I was here before anyone else was.
That’s when a single file line of little unicorns came walking in. I stared at them with open eyed wonder and confusion. Had it been a dream? What was this?
I looked back down at my hands.. Yes they were still hands...I let out a sigh of relief. A relief that was short lived however. A pale pink unicorn with a glittering white mane stopped talking with her friends.
“Oh Look who’s early for class...Yet again!” She said laughing and flipping her mane.
Two other unicorns, one a sky blue and the other an almost lemon yellow with a blue mane giggled. I couldn’t help but feel a bit of shame and embarrassment over this.. I hadn’t a clue why. I was too early?
“Oh, don’t give them too hard of a time Pearly White.” Said the sky blue unicorn. “They just really like to study is all!”
“Pfffft, If that’s what they like...” She rolled her eyes and followed the class in suit as they all sat down. What was going on? Right, don’t fret about it. It’s not important. You’re in school. School work is important.
“Alright my little ponies..” The teacher began. “Settle down and Please pass your homework up to the front of the class.”
There was the familiar shuffling of papers from the back rows going to the front. I reach my hand back to grab the papers only to find that they hover and land on my desk in a neat manner. Pearly White and her friends giggle at me. The teacher walks past the rows of desks picking up the stacks of homework with her magic. She then idly flips through them. Then she comes to my row. Flipping through them, she looks confused. She looks at me.
“It appears that I am missing your homework...” She blinks. “And that is very odd because I am never missing your homework..” I look around, all the unicorns are looking at me, I notice that some of them are whispering. Pearly is next to me, idly drawing something.
“Um...Homework. Right..” I turn to my right to look for a backpack, only to find that there is none. I pat myself down as if I had placed it somewhere on my person. The teacher looks at me with rather kind eyes.
“Did you leave it in your desk maybe?” She asks.
“Oh! Yes, my desk.. How um silly of me..” I respond. Without thinking I open up the desk. There’s my homework, but I also hear the clattering of a pencil dropping and then something heavy. Laughter from the rest of the class is invoked almost immediately. I take out my homework and slump.
“Please stop that all of you.” The teacher says. “I am sure this apple was for me anyway” She picks it up with her magic and sets it on her desk.
“Alright class today we are going to work with more advanced levitation techniques.” She began turning her back to the class and writing on the board. That’s when I felt something land in my hair.
Picking it out I found it was a little paper airplane.
Pearly White looked at me and gave me the look of “Pass it along”, whiles the other unicorn on the other side of me was giving me the “Give it here” gestures. I found myself very confused, couldn’t they just pass it using magic? I shook my head and put it on my desk. I looked at the airplane intently...The two of them smirked and kept giving me the signals to pass the message.. whatever that was along.
“No way I am going to give these two the satisfaction of me getting caught with their message.” I thought to myself. I looked intently at the airplane and found my curiosity poking me. I carefully opened it while the teacher still had her back to the class.. I gasp and look a bit shocked at what I saw drawn on the paper.
It was a childish drawing of the teacher with a huge teeth and an even bigger butt. Wavy lines were above her. A speech bubble read “It’s Alright!”That’s when I noticed the teacher nearly hovering over me. Her face was red and not very happy.
“You think this is funny young lady?” She asked me.
Young lady?
“Um yes...I mean No! No It isn’t funny, but I-I Didn’t draw it!” I stammered.
“Oh Teacher, Yes she did, I saaaw her!” Pearly White said in a whiny innocent sounding voice.
“Her?” I said out loud. “And I did not-” But the teacher cut me off.
“I can not have little ponies in my class acting like this and disrespectful manner to her teachers.” She said with an air of authority.
“P-ponies?” I began, I looked at where my hands were, now there weren’t hands. Now there were tan coloured hooves on my desk. Out of the corner of my eye I saw a reflection of myself in the classroom window. “Her?!” The reflection I saw was that of a little filly with dark brown hair, a tan coat and blue eyes.
“I want to see You after class” She said.
“After Class?! NO!” I shouted.
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“NO! NOT AFTER CLASS!” My eyes snapped open and my heart was racing.
“AH!” Came another scream.
The world came into focus, but cold sweat was running down my face. It didn’t help matters that I didn’t have any idea of where I was. The teacher’s words were still ringing in my ears and I was breathing heavily. The world finally came into focus and I found myself laying on something soft.
“Only a dream.. Only a dre-” I cut off as I realized what my voice sounded like again. Looking down I tried to assess where I was. It didn’t look like the library. I was laying on what appeared to be a bed of some kind, across from me there were what appeared to be bunk beds. But between them there was a window, out of which was some rather fast moving scenery.
I lifted my head and found that there was a sound that I knew. The “Chunka-chunka-chunka!” of a train. Then I recognized the gentle rocking of a train car.
“Great. Waking up in strange places again.” I think to myself sighing. I attempt to move only to find a tight squeezing on my ankles. I lift my head and look down my muzzle. My hooves are still hogtied together apparently.
“Yup. Still a ...pony..” I say resisting my urge to swear. I can feel my ears drooping. The way that my neck is stretching isn’t how necks should stretch. They shouldn’t be this long and they shouldn’t have this much flexibility.
A purple face and hair pop down from the top bunk.
“Oh good! You’re finally awake!” An upside-down Twilight Sparkle said.
“GAH!” I yelp in shock and quickly raise my head. I quickly find that this is a bad idea as my head conks into an over hanging object.
“Oh Son of a...” I want to curse out a storm but instead what happens is a pained squeak. The world refocuses and a concerned Twilight is back in my face.
“Ouch! Are you alright?” She asks me.
“Oh yes Twilight. I am just hunky dory peachy keen!” I say shaking my head of the dizzy feeling.
Twilight blinks and comes down from the upper bunk.
“Does that mean you ...are ok or not?” She asks me.
I try my best not to glare annoyed at her. I’m finding it really hard not to. Whiles the feeling of rage has been softened by sleep, it hasn’t gone back to whatever dark corner it crawled out from. I lay my head back down.
“No Twilight. I am not Ok.” I growl. “I have been evicted out of my reality, had my life stolen, been smashed through a glass window, freaked out, Had A Mental Break Down, Had My Name Stolen, Was Branded, Was Hog Tied, And I keep Waking Up In Strange Places!” She backs away a little bit.
“Great, I am sure now all the mane six think that I am a complete mental case and most likely need to be put down. How could things get any more awkward?” I wonder.
My body decides to answer that question in the most unpleasant of manners. First my stomach gurgles and my mouth feels parched. Then I can feel something stretch and squeeze in my intestines and a pressure on my bladder.
“Uuuugh...And to top it all off. I’m hungry, thirsty and really need to go to the bathroom.” I explain.
Twilight looks at me questioningly, had it not been for the fact that everything in my body just cried out in desperation, I don’t think she would even consider untying me. I haven’t exactly done anything friendly or even show I am in the slightest trustworthy.
“I’ll get AppleJack.” Twilight says in a nervous manner. I hear the sound of sliding doors as Twilight goes to the next cart.
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402816
Inorite? Hey, wait....so do you...;)
406142
A lot of back and forth and side to side. Let's start advertizing and make some real Money!
belive thatthe interaction with the interaction with the other world is the weak point to your story and I find myself more then alittle confused by it
2115537 Dreams Happen.
So, difficulty socializing and understanding other pon-er-people. Lack of or unusual emotional responses. A terrible love life filled with bitterness and rejection, and negligence on one's own part. Persipacity during childhood. Extreme anxiety when achieving one's greatest dream, simply because it didn't happen the way you wanted.
) will bring more awareness to the importance of reaching these individuals. With a little prompting they often can come do great things and, without a little prompting... I don't even like to think about it. We need more studies! Bigger, longer, fastidiouser!
Oh yeah clearly it's A.D.D. bring out the ritalin guys.
The saddest thing about an autism diagnosis though is that treatments do exist for enabling autistic children to recover some abilities they conspicuously lack and . In particular oxytocin inhalations coupled with counseling involving artificial social situation games seem to have a lasting and profound effect on many. But it's not yet an accepted treatment and studies are still pending or not very well known (they don't call it REsearch because you discover it the first time around after all).
But hopefully the presence of an autistic character in FiM (I'm looking at you Twilight~
Oh uh, cool chapter too!
3601112 I sorta dislike how that field often reaches for random medications nowadays. There's a reason the field is called a 'practice' and not a science, more often than not they are doing a lot of guesswork with little science to back it up. One of the few effective ways I've seen work is counseling or community group sessions such as specialized camps. This allows the person to get the experience needed to overcome the issues while the other ways are just as bad if not worse than ignoring it.
3601112
I'd just like to point out that being OCD and intelligent does not mean you are autistic. Stop using 4chan diagnosis.
407084 Listen to me! Listen to me, my children! Listen to me! Gather around to hear the sound of my voice...
Hoo boy the random capitalization issue really shows in this line.
8755735
A different time and a different place... One day, I may go back over it and see what needs changing.
So this character seems very autistic to me. ADD and Autism have very similar symptoms (really that word isn't right cause neither are a disease or aything really wrong just different) but a lot of the social aspects of Heartbreak scream autism over ADD, like the frustration and having 'tantrums' cause that sounds like having meltdowns, which is a thing very common to autistic people when they get over whelmed, but my experience and reading says that isn't a very common thing for ADD, though to be fair the two tend to be very comorbid so.
10054745
I hope that isn't a deal breaker...