My Little Random

by UniqueSKD

This Coffee Smells Like Plot!

Author's Note:

WARNING! This chapter should be skipped if you are sickened easily.

Also, this part is inspired by a hilarious scene from 'Austin Powers 2: The Spy Who Shagged Me'.

Rainbow Dash let out a loud sigh as she rested her head on her hooves, boredom written all over her face. She'd go to the washroom and clean the marker pen off the first chance she got.

Until then, she was trying her best to tolerate Twilight's explanation of flight physics and mathematics on an over-sized chalkboard. Rainbow Dash had only come to the book-smart alicorn to find out if it was possible to pull off a certain trick she was trying out, and somehow Twilight had trailed off onto boring equations and theoretical mumbo-jumbo that were of no interest to the cyan pegasus.

Celestia darn it, Twilight. I see your mouth moving, but all I keep hearing is 'blah, blah, blah'..., Rainbow thought to herself as she elected to slump down at the desk which Twilight had 'ever so kindly' provided for her before her hour-long lecture. Even now, the alicorn princess was sketching multiple diagrams of various somersaults and aerial spins, labeling them with complicated science-y stuff.

Rainbow decided now was as good a time as any to find an excuse to slip away from the alicorn. Unfortunately for the pegasus, Twilight had locked the basement door behind them when she had magically dragged her down here, so it would be difficult trying to escape without the alicorn noticing and causing an awkward moment. So that left the option of finding something to distract her for a while.

Rainbow was kind of thirsty, actually. And as luck would have had it, Twilight just so happened to have a coffee machine down here in the basement. Probably for all those late-night readings and studies she must have done, no doubt.

Pushing herself away from her desk, Rainbow Dash fell onto all fours and walked over the coffee machine. "Hey, Twi, I'm gonna grab a drink if you don't mind," the pegasus called out to her friend, still in the process of sketching an image of a loop-de-loop, again with complicated maths and stuff.

Twilight just waved a hoof, not really paying much attention at the moment.

Rainbow Dash pushed down on a switch to turn on the coffee machine. A light came on, and the air around the device suddenly got warmer, suggesting it was heating up the caffeinated liquid inside. Rainbow Dash just leaned again the table, rubbing her hoof against her leg and inspecting it as she waited for the coffee to be ready.

And Twilight was still drawing stuff. Great...

The device pinged, alerting the pegasus that it was done. She took a mug that was next to the device and placed it in a slot on the machine, and pushed down on another switch, causing the brown liquid to pour out from a small nozzle. When the mug was nearly full, Rainbow Dash released her hold on the switch, and the nozzle stopped pouring its contents.

Taking the mug from out of the slot, Rainbow Dash held the drink in her hooves, letting the hot drink warm them for a moment. She then brought the mug close to her lips, until a strange and foul smell entered her nostrils.

Her eyes widening from the smell, Rainbow Dash brought the mug away from her face, looking down at it in confusion. Bringing it close to her and taking a sniff, her face contorted into a look of repulse as she identified the source of the strange stench.

"Hey, Twilight!" Rainbow called out to the alicorn, who was, unsurprisingly, STILL drawing diagrams and labeling them with things that made no sense to the rainbow-maned mare at all. Twilight stopped what she was doing and turned her head to show she was listening. "Yes, Rainbow? What is it?" she asked.

Rainbow raised her mug of coffee and pointed at it with her free hoof. "I think there's something wrong with your coffee machine, cause' your coffee smells like plot!"

Twilight gave her friend a confused look, before looking over to what Rainbow Dash must have assumed was a coffee machine, which if the pegasus had bothered to look at the side of, would have seen it was in fact a toiletry disposal unit used for collecting... 'biologically-created waste', we will say. Her eyes widened and her jaw fell open in horror when she put two and two together, realizing that it made four.

"Rainbow Dash, that coffee IS plot!", the alicorn cried out to her friend.

Rainbow Dash looked at her mug, then to Twilight, then back to her mug. She then looked back to Twilight and let out a sigh of relief. "Oh, thank Celestia, it's not just me who thinks so."

Twilight could only cover her mouth with her hooves and cringe as Rainbow Dash put the mug to her mouth and took a swig of something more vile and disgusting since the creation of Marmite.

As Rainbow Dash brought the mug away from her lips, leaving brown mustache stain on her upper-lip, she smacked her lips and said to the princess, who was heaving and retching heavily, "It's got a bit of a nutty taste to it, Twilight."

Comments

[Zytharros]

...
Where's my brain bleach?
Lalalalalalalalalalalalalalala.......
Magikarp Girl! Go! Use Splash attack!

[UniqueSKD]

4162867 Oh, you read the new chapter, I see? XD

Well, it gets a lot more weird and worse.

[SolongStarbird]

hnnnng... keck!

[xXDavis2211Xx]

[Forgotten Legends]

- Hey Rainbow would you like some ecoli with your coffee?

- What do you mean?

- Or would you like some toilet paper?

- "Looks down" You mean I just drank...

- Yes you did

- 'Turns green then Pukes"

- I told you that coffee was plot..

[Rootbeer Dew]

Need. Vodka. STAT.

[Forgotten Legends]

Yo Unique here is the video for it

Personally yours is funnier

[Ice Star]

4163986

Oh gosh...some one please perform an exorsicim on the unholy chapter that this is....

[thatonerandombrony]

Hnng...hnng
[youtube=https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=YQ-ZWsVeoKI]
00:6-the end is relevant.

[luna the writer]

Amazing!!!!!!!!!!!