• Published 30th Mar 2014
  • 1,712 Views, 19 Comments

Destinies For A Day - Yappyjack



Twilight is in her library and she finds a spell called Destinies For A Day. Twilight Finds no harm in the spell...once she casted it of corse.

  • ...
3
 19
 1,712

Back to Normal

Yesterday Twilight's friends became alicorns and today is a new day which Twilight will use to salve this problem.
Twilight got up that morning, expecting her friends to come back to her house.

There was a knock at the door, and Twilight trotted down the stairs. She opened the door to let her friends in. Twilight gasped. they were back to normal. "Girls, this is getting weird now. What happened?" Twilight asked, still half shocked.

"We don't know. We went to bed alicorns, and we woke up normal." Applejack explained.

"Twilight, did you cast a spell to make us normal again?" Rainbow Dash asked.

"No I didn't." Twilight said flipping through the book that gave her the spell.

"Well something must have happened dear." Rarity said.

"We want to be alicorns again." Pinkie Pie said.

This caused Twilight to stop flipping the pages of the book and turn around. "You...you do?" Twilight was now in full shock, were these really her friends? Did she hear wrong?

"Well... we don't if, you don't want us to." Fluttershy spoke up.

Twilight still stood in shock. When Twilight could get herself to think she smiled. Her friends smiled back. Twilight looked at the book and thought.

Twilight looked at the spell over and over again, but couldn't figure out why one dat they are alicorns and the next day they are normal again. Twilight was sure to find the answer.

Wile Twilight looked over the book, her friends talked about why they liked being alicorns.
Rarity liked it because it made her feel like she was royalty.
Pinkie Pie liked it because she could make cupcakes ten times faster with magic.
Fluttershy liked it because the magic could help her heal animal faster and better.
Applejack liked it because it helped her get apples off the trees in bigger amounts.
Rainbow Dash liked it because she could fly faster.

Twilight still couldn't find the answer. She walked up to her balcony to get some fresh air. Twilight was working hard in her mind, or maybe just working too hard.

"I don't know what to do." Twilight said still thinking about the spell.

"You are trying a bit hard Twilight." A voice said.

Twilight looked around to see Princess Celestia. "Hello Princess Celestia." Twilight said with discouragement.

The Princess wrapped a wing around Twilight. "I know you are trying Twilight. But you need to remember what your book said,
This spell will give the ones closest to your heart, their Destinies For A Day." Celestia said.

Twilight looked up at the Princess. "You are right. Destinies For A Day." Twilight finally under stood. "Thank you Princess." Twilight said. Twilight ran down the stairs to the library and Celestia left.

"Girls!" Twilight yelled. "I understand now." Twilight continued.

"Understand what dear?" Rarity asked.

"The spell that I cast was called, Destinies For A Day." Twilight explained.

"So, it was only supposed to be for a day?" Rainbow Dash asked.

"Yep." Twilight replied.

"Can yall make us alicorns again?" Applejack asked.

Twilight shook her head and said, "Don't worry girls, remember that one day you will have your Destinies Forever."

Comments ( 18 )

The writing could be more in depth, but the plot of the story was really nice!

It was a good story, a few spelling mistakes here and there and it could be a bit longer and more in depth but otherwise really good.
If you need an editor I'd be glad to help.

I will keep that in mind :twilightsmile: Thank-you:raritywink:

I liked the concept. It felt rushed. Not that I mind but if you could make their hardships more known and follow the 6 around and see how they are dealing with things.

This whole story would be nicer if you just made it a one-shot, compiled it all into one. The chapters are awfully short.
And that's were the problem lies. You see, apart from the grammar mistakes, the idea was interesting. And could have been more expanded upon!
1,686 words is not a lot, and a story like this could have used more. Like 5,000 words, for example. Or split it into chapters, but made them longer. Now, I am not saying that you can't write a good story with only that many words. You can, but that's a different case.
One of the reasons MLP is good, is because the characters all act and react in different ways. So maybe you could show that they weren't all that happy. (For example, if Rarity would have to stay like that forever, she'd have to remake all her dresses. And she could be worried about that.)
It would be nice if you could actually show us their full day with their new bodies. Like, what would be the reaction of the other ponies in Ponyville? Or their families? Their other friends?
Maybe one of them would have a problem with controlling their wings? Or they would scratch their head, only to feel a horn sticking on top of it?
You should just really take your time in writing and publishing stories. Take time to show the story unfolding. It's better to publish a story later, if it means that other people and you will enjoy it more.

I know how bad I have been doing and I not saying that's what you said or mean.
I am known for my very short stories, maybe I can update these stories, make them better and longer, you know.:pinkiesmile:
I don't take offense to anything that you said.:twilightsmile:
I actually find these kind of comments to be quite helpful.:raritywink:
I am glad that you tell me where the mistakes are so that I can fix them.
I had had an idea to show a new story and what the scheme of it is, and also get some advice on parts of the story that I will put in.
After reading this comment please look at my newest Blog to see what I am saying.
Thanks for the help.:twilightsmile:

4188130
Well, I'm glad that you understand! I myself am still new to writing.
I'm glad you can take something out of my comments. You know, people learn all their life. It's important to listen to others, but also listen to yourself... But I'm getting off topic.
Shorts stories are fine! In fact, they're awesome! But it really depends on what you want to show. For example, you wouldn't want to write an epic adventure dark war fanfic with a romance subplot in 600 words! But that doesn't mean you can't write such short stories.
Ever heard of flash-fiction?

A bit short, but nice. :pinkiesmile:

How did you get your story out with only 580 words and below?!?!?!?! :pinkiegasp:

4745650
I didn't I had to wright the first two chapters before I could publish it.:raritywink:

4755619 REALLY THAT'S ALL YOU HAVE TO DO!!?!?!?!!?!? Crud me..............:facehoof:

Thanks

Even though "The Mane 6 turns into alicorns" plot has been done a lot since Magical Mystery Cure, I still quite enjoy them. But with this story, however, could have been fleshed out more so that it could be more interesting. I know that the spell is called "Destinies for a Day", but maybe you could've had multiple chapters that described everypony's day as an alicorn.

5352070

I have been thinking about editing some of my chapters for my shorter stories...:duck:

So, I might come back and add some more later when I'm not working on SO MUCH SCHOOLWORK!!! (The horror:raritydespair:)

5352985

I feel you, man/madam. :fluttershysad:

It's actually a great story. Many people might complain about it being short, but I like short chapters. It had some spelling errors and stuff but that's fine. It has a great plot and all. I actually like it.

6928831 Thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed it!:twilightsmile:

Login or register to comment